do possums sing

Subject: do possums sing
From: McKnees
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 07:42 PM

I got to wondering if possums sing and if so what songs?

To dream the impossumal dream. or It's impossumal or perhaps this tape will self destruct in 5 seconds

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Alice
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 07:57 PM

call me irrepossumal

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Cap't Bob
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 08:49 PM

Possumtivily they sing ~ and they dance ~ and they cross roads. Oh well ~ two out of three ain't bad.

Cap't Bob

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: katlaughing
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 08:59 PM

It's impossumable!

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Alice
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 09:32 PM

Now, if Disney made a movie about singing possums, would Catspaw hate it? Gee, maybe that Disney movie has already been made... remember those nature flicks on Wonderful World of Color of all the 'cute' animals? Spaw, do I hear you screaming?

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Duane D.
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 10:09 PM

and they also drink their posstum.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Alice
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 10:43 PM

This thread is just begging for jokes about possum possteriors... something like Working On The Eery Anal... no, I guess that belongs in the amusing work song thread.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: catspaw49
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 10:56 PM

Hey....Possums not only sing (they don't whistle too good), but they write songs too. Go see the "Welcome Eddie" thread.

Spaw

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Art Thieme
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 11:09 PM

Sure they sing---Why do you think they call George Jones "Possum"???

They say there was a possum crossing the road when G.J. had his recent auto accident. The possum was trying to prove to the chicken that he could do that too! The result? More roadkill!! Almost 2 possums at one time!!!

Art

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Art Thieme
Date: 18 Aug 99 - 11:12 PM

Knock Kneed One,

You make a GREAT straight man! ;-)

Art

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 12:39 AM

there are no otter possum jokes left.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: harpgirl
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 12:57 AM

...watch out, all...I might possumly hurl!!

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:05 AM

Possum me that pitcher of ale, will ya? --seed

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Alice
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:15 AM

And now he is dead and he lay in his coffin,
Six jolly sailors to carry him along,
Six jolly maidens shall carry white roses,
Not for to smell him as you POSSUM by.

(THE YOUNG SAILOR CUT DOWN IN HIS PRIME)

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:26 AM

Great, Alice (I've heard the same verse in The Streets of Laredo, except in first person). --seed

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:29 AM

Alice, you send me off to dreamland on possumer wings.
But first I'll read a few words from Posstradamus.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Barbara
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:37 AM

And maybe if you exhume him, you can get Posstadamus to do it himself, possumously.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:42 AM

This is possumly the silliest thread ever. --seed

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:42 AM

Possumbly Barbara.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: katlaughing
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 01:58 AM

Seed: don't you mean in first possum?Heehee

The possumbilities appear to be endless.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: bassen
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 06:02 AM

All right, if you insist:

"Pa Sum's Sing"

- dedicated somewhat belatedly to LEJ for the most raucous laughter ever to ring out within the walls of the museum wherein I sit...

Am I blew?
Am I blew?
Ain't these tears in my eyes
Tellin' you?

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Art Thieme
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 10:01 AM

My dog ate two hundred dollar bills I had around the house. Now, I wasn't one to let that go. I fed that puppy 20 bottles of mineral oil, 2 entire boxes of X-lax, seven full boxes of granola and 50 prunes. But wouldn't you know, She couldn't poss 'em. They were counterfeit.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: joeler
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 10:19 AM

I'm sure they do, but, and don't get upset here, do they sing folk music?

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Art Thieme
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 10:23 AM

After that, the only song I could sing around the house without the dog barking angrily was "Old Blue"---'cause that's what that dog WAS--a very blue dog.

Art

P.S.---You may have noticed, I don't like to keep jokes to myself. I seem bound to p....m on to you fine folks.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Bert
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 10:45 AM

A great hippopossumus was standing one day....

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Bert
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 11:06 AM

Of course our very own Cleigh sings....

Let the wind blow high
Let the wind blow low
As down the street in my kilt I go
All the Lasses shout "Hello, Possum where's your trousers"

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: MMario
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 11:14 AM

Cleigh wears a kilt?

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Dave Swan
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 06:06 PM

P.J. is an honest to God possum wrangler in her day job, and sometimes I get to be a possum wrangler's helper (oh, the glamour) and to the best of our knowledge here's what a possum can do: Belch, fart, hiss, snarl, resist evolution, freeze up and stare, crunch a mean cricket, lip smack around a tasty dish of dog food and meal worms, eliminate, bluff, sneeze (they do that a lot), mumble and walk like a broken tricycle. What a possum can't do, no matter how many irresistable sing-a-long choruses are sung to him, right in his little grey ear, is sing. They just can't be bothered. Perhaps ol' Cliegh is a sub-species. E.S.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Jeri
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 06:13 PM

Psst, Dave...alien DNA...secret government experiments...whoops, gotta go hide in the bomb shelter - I thought I heard something outside, and the sneaky bastards know how to get the basement windows open. They keep installing listening devices that look just like cobwebs...

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 06:34 PM

Possum me, possum me mucho,
Each time I look in your eyes I hear music divine,
Possum me, possum me mucho,
Love me forever and say that you'll always be mine.

--seedwhorememberedthelinebreaksthistime

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: campfire
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 06:51 PM

And they have Possumality!

campfire

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: catspaw49
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 07:05 PM

Y'all been havin' a real good time here since I last checked in. I'm voting for "Possum Me Mucho" as the most.........well, whatever it and this thread represent(total lunacy), it got my vote for the most of it.

Somebody send the Insanevac Chopper to pick-up Seed.

Spaw

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Barbara
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 07:07 PM

Ya, seed, who remembered the line breaks this time; when you forget the word breaks, you turn into seed whore membered....
possumately yrs,

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: McKnees
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 07:17 PM

Thanks peoples, I needed the laugh, and Art I,m straight but not a guy. We don't have any of these wonderful animals in Scotland, but judging by the ammount that seem to perish on your roads it must be the equivilant of Hedgehogs. Which are little animals with lots of prick les most often seen in two dimensions. Sorry we don't suffer so much from PC here, should I have said dimensionally challenged.

Knock knee'd one

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 07:30 PM

Well, that too, maybe, Barbara...

--seedwhooughtakeephisstupidmouthshutandgetbacktowork

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: katlaughing
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 09:19 PM

ElSwanno & PJ....my friend, Kim, used to be a possum wrangler, too, of sorts. She was the designated looney at teh zoo she worked at who was willign tot ake on caring for the littlest critters who'd lost their moms to big ol'e three dimensional roadhogs! Sounds like hers had the same type of diet. We cared for one over a long weekend and I remember feeding it a lot of boiled eggs, as well.

KKOne: my son had a pet hedgehog for awhile and I had a friend from Germany who had one. The ones I've seen over here, from pet stores, are smaller than our grownup possums. I was surprised that the spines on a hedgehog don't prickle that much, at least not the one I was able to pet and hold.

Absopossumlutely Yours,

kat

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: catspaw49
Date: 19 Aug 99 - 09:40 PM

Dig it Knockers.....Art uses the term "Straight Man" in it's common form and it does not denote a gender. Perhaps the greatest "Straight Man" of all time was Margaret Dumont who did many of the Marx brothers films. Perhaps what truly made her great was that she REALLY DIDN'T GET THE JOKES!!! She made a special appearance on one of Groucho's TV specials just days before she died, virtually penniless. It was a great couple of minutes though to watch.......and she still didn't get the jokes.

And I'm glad to hear that PC is less of a problem there Knockers.

Spaw

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Bert
Date: 20 Aug 99 - 07:27 AM

Kat,

We used to feed our possums on catfood. They liked eggs but tended to be somewhat antisocial after eating them. They would eat almost anything but absolutely loved hot dogs.

Bert.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Barbara
Date: 20 Aug 99 - 10:30 AM

I think it was YOU, not the possum, being antisocial, Bert, and I've noticed that hot dogs are another antisocial pet food, no?

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: Bert
Date: 20 Aug 99 - 10:42 AM

I must admit that there are some advantages of keeping animals. But it wasn't me (that time).

Hot dogs have that effect on our dog but the possums seemed to handle them OK.

Subject: RE: do possums sing
From: katlaughing
Date: 20 Aug 99 - 04:37 PM

Bert: If you were a dawg would you want to eat something called a hot dawg? I mean what if that HOT dawg was your cute little friend "Fifi" from down the street, wasn't she a hot little number????:-)

katwhoeatsNOdawgs!