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Song Challenge! 2.0 - Fit 10

mousethief 10 Oct 10 - 09:29 PM
Amos 11 Oct 10 - 01:39 PM
GUEST,georgiansilver 12 Oct 10 - 04:46 AM
Matthew Edwards 12 Oct 10 - 08:47 AM
mousethief 12 Oct 10 - 03:07 PM
mousethief 12 Oct 10 - 03:19 PM
mousethief 12 Oct 10 - 03:22 PM
Amos 12 Oct 10 - 03:37 PM
MMario 12 Oct 10 - 04:32 PM
mousethief 14 Oct 10 - 12:18 AM
Matthew Edwards 14 Oct 10 - 09:55 AM
mousethief 14 Oct 10 - 11:40 AM
Matthew Edwards 14 Oct 10 - 11:48 AM
Amos 14 Oct 10 - 12:10 PM
Matthew Edwards 15 Oct 10 - 08:40 AM
GUEST,Neil D 15 Oct 10 - 08:51 AM
GUEST,Al Boyce 15 Oct 10 - 06:18 PM
mousethief 15 Oct 10 - 07:55 PM
Flash Company 19 Oct 10 - 10:20 AM
mousethief 20 Oct 10 - 12:32 PM
mousethief 25 Oct 10 - 12:04 AM
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Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 10 Oct 10 - 09:29 PM

SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10

Okay, after bears and parrots, we're leaving the zoological gardens. Or, well, this one is about the FBI. You decide.

FBI busted tracking student; demands GPS spy gear return

Several days ago a 20-year-old student discovered a GPS tracking device hidden on his car. After his friend posted a picture of it online, speculating about its ties to a secret FBI investigation, the feds themselves came a-knockin', according to Wired.com. They wanted their toy back.

Based on the discussion with the six FBI agents who arrived at his doorstep, Yassir Afifi believes he'd been under surveillance for three to six months. When Wired asked an FBI spokesman about the case, he did not acknowledge ownership of the device, but said that there was an "ongoing investigation."


Yeah. It's not ours, but give it back. Anyway can we think of any wry songs for this one?


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Amos
Date: 11 Oct 10 - 01:39 PM

I've been worrying
'Bout my job
Since I started tracking down that yuppie slob
Where the bug went, I can't say,
When if tuned in to its note, it had gone away.

Gone away!
Since yesterday!
Now I find that it's very hard to think
Since I lost the Bureau's tracker,
And I fear a slip of pink.

He found the bug
SHowed it to Jed.
A goddam geek with
A devil in his head
He took a picture
With his iPhone
And my boss said "You can't handl;e this alone!"

Gone away!
Since yesterday!
Now I find that it's very hard to think
Since I lost the Bureau's tracker,
And I fear a slip of pink.

We came to call
At Yassir's dorm
With five strong-armed louts along to threaten pain
But he said the thing was lost
And that Jed was not available to explain

Gone away!
Since yesterday!
Now I find that it's very hard to think
Since I lost the Bureau's tracker,
And I fear a slip of pink.


We went back to
Our tracking van
When the signal strong and clear again began!
It was loud and clear
A good seven bars!
From a NASA robot on a trip to Mars!

Gone away!
Since yesterday!
Now I find that it's very hard to think
Since I lost the Bureau's tracker,
And I fear a slip of pink.
Now I've lost the Bureau's tracker
And I fear a slip of pink.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: GUEST,georgiansilver
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 04:46 AM

Come on lets crawl, lets crawl, lets crawl.
To the ugly bug ball, to the ball to the ball.
We are going to get tracked folks, One and all.
At the ugly bug ball!

Sorry no time for anything more... away from home at family crisis. Best wishes, Mike.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Matthew Edwards
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 08:47 AM

More fast footwork from Amos there, with some nice nifty rhymes. All the best to Mike and family, and hoping the crisis is soon resolved.

Here's a short contribution in verse:-

Special Intelligence

We're Special Agents in the Feds
We like to track down pinks and reds;
And anyone we think is no good -
We'll place a bug beneath your hood.

And if you have a funny name,
We'll track you down just the same;
We've bought our bug from Radio Shack,
If you find it please give it back.

In this case its sad to tell
We didn't hide it very well;
Our op it seems was rather bungled
And so alas! the bugger's buggered.

Matthew

On the site Alex linked above to there was one truly frightening comment on this story which read:-
"As for myself, I don't fear this kind of oversight. For those of you who do, I would seriously question your loyalty, motive, or common sense."


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 03:07 PM

Ah yes, nobody with nothing to hide is ever hounded by the government. What a log of schlock!

Anyway how about some BLOBs!
  • A paranoid BLOB to Amos for the sorrowful:
    Now I've lost the Bureau's tracker
    And I fear a slip of pink.
  • A fatalist BLOB to Georgiansilver for the all-too-true:
    We are going to get tracked folks, One and all.
  • And finally a political BLOB to Matthew Edwards for the xenophilic:
    And if you have a funny name,
    We'll track you down just the same
Keep up the goo work!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 03:19 PM

Okay, a quickie with apologies to Ragni, Rado & MacDermot:

Initials

F-B-I put the G-P-S in Afifi's Chevrolet
When he found it, what did he do?
Post on the blogosphere with photos, too

F-B-I
G-P-S
Blog-o-sphere
What a mess

F-B-I
S-O-B's
A-F-U
L-O-L

F. B. I. G. P. S. A. F. U.
F --- B --- I


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 03:22 PM

Um, keep up the good work!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Amos
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 03:37 PM

LOL!! A great children's song for the Brave New Era ahead, Alex!!!


A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: MMario
Date: 12 Oct 10 - 04:32 PM

I know a young student who found him a bug
I don't know how, he found him a bug.
He found the bug right under his bumper
Who it belonged to, now that was a stumper.
So he published a picture out on the web
and then the EFF Bee of I certainly said:

We planted no bug, not a one,no siree;
it isn't ours; As you plainly see.
It isn't out bug, from under your bumper
Who planted it there, is surely a stumper.

It isn't our bug, no it isn't at all
Some other agency set it to crawl.
It isn't our bug, from under your bumper
Who put it there, is surely a stumper.

It isn't our bug; for bugs we do lack
We never bugged you; that is a fact
It isn't our bug; why don't you believe
It isn't our bug - and we want it BACK!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 12:18 AM

Here's a head-wagging Silver-BLOB to MMario for the inexplicable:
It isn't our bug; why don't you believe
It isn't our bug - and we want it BACK!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Matthew Edwards
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 09:55 AM

The FBI Rules of Deniability

There are some things we deny because we aren't involved.
There are some things we deny because we are involved.
There are other things we deny because we don't know whether we are involved or not.
And then there are ongoing investigations.

And don't quote me; because I haven't just told you this.

Matthew


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 11:40 AM

Is that a song, or did you just copy-and-paste from their website?


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Matthew Edwards
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 11:48 AM

@mousethief - Ha! :-)

As for the first question, I don't think it could possibly be fitted to a tune but I'm willing to be surprised.
I could tell you whether I found it on their website, but then I'd have to terminate you with extreme prejudice.

Matthew


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Amos
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 12:10 PM

With a little tweaking it would fit to the tune of "The Blues My Naughty Sweetie Gives To Me".

"...And there are sins deserving trial which we meet with full denial while we fund them with the taxes you provide

And there are secret revelations and obscure assassinations
That would make the toughestsoldier want to hide.
..."


Etc. Etc. AND etc.


A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Matthew Edwards
Date: 15 Oct 10 - 08:40 AM

You guys want TUNES???? OK, OK, OK - here's something even a three-year-old can sing along to.

Bug Song

I went a-driving in my car, car,
I went a-driving in my car, car,
I drove all around, in and out of town,
I went a-driving in my car.

I went for to change the oil, oil,
I went for to change the oil, oil,
The engine was thirsty, and looked pretty dusty,
I went for to change the oil.

The mechanic noticed a wire, wire,
The mechanic noticed a wire, wire,
He gave a little tug, and pulled out a bug,
The mechanic noticed a wire.

He yanked out a little bitty bug, bug,
He yanked out a little bitty bug, bug,
It was silver and black with a battery pack,
He yanked out a little bitty bug.

I posted the photo on the web, web,
I posted the photo on the web, web,
Much to my surprise it was an Orion Guardian ST820 tracking device,
I posted the photo on the web.

I found out it was a tracker, tracker,
I found out it was a tracker, tracker,
Yes oh yes, it had GPS,
I found out it was a tracker.

I got a visit from six Feds, Feds,
I got a visit from six Feds, Feds,
With a Federal operative, you gotta be cooperative,
I got a visit from six Feds.

They asked for their little bug back, back,
They asked for their little bug back, back,
"Its Federal prop'ty, so you better not get snotty,"
They asked for their little bug back.

So now I go driving in my car, car,
So now I go driving in my car, car,
I have no fears, cos I know the Government cares,
When I go driving in my car.

Matthew Edwards (with apologies to Woody Guthrie, and to the parents of any three-year-olds who won't stop singing)


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: GUEST,Neil D
Date: 15 Oct 10 - 08:51 AM

Very clever Matthew. I especially like "with a Federal operative, you gotta be cooperative". I would have joined in the merriment on this one but I just couldn't think of anything funny to rhyme about it.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: GUEST,Al Boyce
Date: 15 Oct 10 - 06:18 PM

Just browsing around and saw the Song Challenge revived! This one's fast and dirty, but I wanted to get in on it quick!

YASSIR, THAT'S MY KAYBEE
Tune: Yes Sir, That's My Baby
Original: Writer(s): Gus Kahn/Walter Donaldson
New Lyrics: Al Boyce (aka Trapper)

Yassir, that's my KayBee
Spy Toy, Don't mean maybe
Yassir, let me say be cool

Yassir, we're all G-Men
Can't say to where it's beamin'
Yassir, give us back our tool

By the way, we will say
Saw it's photo on Facebook yesterday

Yassir, that's my KayBee
Spy Toy, Don't mean maybe
Yassir, let me say be cool


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 15 Oct 10 - 07:55 PM

Okay, you guys are awesome. Here are some well-deserved Silver BLOBs!
  • An eminently deniable BLOB to Matthew Edwards for the insightful:
    There are other things we deny because we don't know whether we are involved or not.
  • And a mouthful o' BLOB again to Matthew Edwards for the meter-busting:
    Much to my surprise it was an Orion Guardian ST820 tracking device,
  • And finally a Broadway BLOB to Al Boyce for the toe-tappin':
    Yassir, we're all G-Men
    Can't say to where it's beamin'
What a delightful set o' BLOBs! You guys rock! Or, well, folk.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: Flash Company
Date: 19 Oct 10 - 10:20 AM

There's a bug on my dashboard,Mr FBI Agent,
There's a bug on my dasboard, Mr Agent , a bug

I'll call round and collect it, dear Yassir, dear Yassir
Be round in the morning before you are up!

So the bug then is yours, Mr FBI Agent,
I guess I can take it, it was put there by you!

That is not what I told you, Dear Yassir, dear Yassir,
I never conceded that the bug might be ours!

Then why do you want it? Mr FBI Agent,
Oh, why do you want it, Oh pray tell me why.

Fot our investigations , Dear Yassir, dear Yassir
We need to discover why your car has been bugged!

But I thought I might sell it, Mr FBI Agent,
I'll put it on E-Bay for a dollar or two.

We will know if you try that, Dear Yassir, dear Yassir,
I would not advise it, it would'n't be wise.

But how will you know? Mr FBI Agent,
Yes how will you find out, oh please tell me how?

There's a bug on your dashboard, Dear Yassir, dear Yassir,
There's a bug on your dashboard, dear Yassir A BUG!

FC


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 20 Oct 10 - 12:32 PM

Welcome to the challenge, Flash Company! What a great entrance! Before we proceed to the Cow Chips I must give you a Silver BLOB for the nicely-rhymed:
We will know if you try that, Dear Yassir, dear Yassir,
I would not advise it, it would'n't be wise.


Back in a few with the Cow Chips.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! 2.0 - Fit 10
From: mousethief
Date: 25 Oct 10 - 12:04 AM

Okay I have a moment to spare, and who deserves it more than our Challengees? (My daughter is getting married this week (Tuesday, don't ask) and it's been topsy turvy.)

So without further ado, we have Golden Cow Chip Awards!

The Golden Cow Chip Award with Harp Ribbon (for making the Judges fall on the floor laughing OR make them short out their keyboard with tears) is hereby awarded to:
  • Amos for "I've been worrying 'bout my job"
  • Matthew Edwards for "Special Intelligence"
  • MMario for "I know a young student who found him a bug"
Golden Cow Chip Award with Guinness Crest (for causing both Harp Ribbon conditions within one song) is hereby awarded to:
  • Flash Company for "There's a bug on my dashboard"
The Golden Cow Chip Award with Shamrock Cluster (for a very high level of imagination, imagery, and/or creative use of language in a song) is hereby awarded to:
  • Matthew Edwards for "The FBI Rules of Deniability"
The Golden Cow Chip Award with with Mt. Rainier Medallion (for closely and hilariously following the pattern of its original) is hereby awarded to:
  • Georgiansilver for "Come on let's crawl"
  • Al Boyce for "Yassir, That's My Kaybee"
The Golden Cow Chip Award with Memorial MMario Silverplated Spittoon (for evoking an instantaneous bubbling up of frothy mirth from out of the lips of the Judges and onto their monitor screen) is hereby awarded to:
  • Matthew Edwards for "Bug Song"


Join us for Fit 11 at a thread near you!


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