That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.

Subject: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Tim Leaning
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 10:33 AM

That Blitherscrum Folk Festival is shit.
They advertise it as Folk but then when you go its loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff
Discuss.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 10:47 AM

"its loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff "

Sounds more like that Crosby, Stills and Nash at Glastonbuggery.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Silas
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 10:51 AM

"loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff"

Love absoloutly LOVE IT!!!!!

LOL

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,bearded wazzock
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 10:51 AM

I hate bloody folk songs, and what's more if any of them smiled smugly at me I'd start a bloody thread on Mudcat about it!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Affronted of Blitherscrum
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 10:58 AM

Hear Hear! I really wish that Mudcat would stop beardy wazzocks talking about bloody shit folk songs, it's a bloody disgrace!

---

Hmmmm. It appears that the following all share the same computer: GUEST,Mr. Parsnip, GUEST,wazzock police, GUEST,Member of Bulboushead, GUEST,Dorothy Frottage, GUEST,Brynhildr, GUEST, Nu-Folkie, GUEST,Affronted of Blitherscrum, GUEST,bearded wazzock, et al. I have to say all these Guests make me nervous, but I'll let it go in the name of humor humour.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 10:59 AM

"They advertise it as Folk but then when you go its loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff "

Well clearly it's not really folk.... all real folkies know that all the real folk singers are dead.

.... and just because a song is old, doesn't make it a folk song, in fact all the folk songs are dead as well. Killed by the interweb and by simple working folk becoming literate.

Claerly you know nothing Mr Leaning, in fact you're sh+t.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Nu-Folkie
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:05 AM

Sadly I'm too young to have grown a beard yet, because I'm only twelve and three quarters. I'm looking forward to being a beardy wazzock soon though!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:07 AM

Yes, but was there a panel discussion on What is Folk?

(I've never heard the term 'wazzock' before. Did you just make it up, Tim? And is the accent on the 'waz-' or the '-zock'?)

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Rain Dog
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:10 AM

7 posts already to this thread. That proves beyond any shadow of a doubt Blitherscrum Folk Festival is shit. The whole of Mudcat has spoken. No, in fact the whole of the world has spoken.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:13 AM

This thread is wazzockist. There must be a law against it.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:13 AM

That's the trouble with folk. It's full of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff. If I hear one more song about maidenheads and strong cider I'll throw up.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:16 AM

"maidenheads and strong cider "

Maidenheads haven't existed since we discovered sex in 1965 - or was it 1695? Sod it, just pass the strong cider.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:16 AM

And what's wrong with Maidenhead? Maidenheadians will tell you it's a fine town. But us beardy old wazzocks know it's nearly as shit as Blitherscrum.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Brynhildr
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:17 AM

"beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs and stuff"

You bloody call that "singing"? I'm a professional in the music industry and all folk singers are total crap and pretentious as well. All other music is brilliant though. I know that because I'm a professional in the music industry.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:17 AM

Not all the bearded wazzocks are male, either !

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Manitas_at_home
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:19 AM

I think you'll find that most of the posters here are guests, in fact I suspect the whole thing is a wind-up.

PS Fred what have you got against Maidenhead? It seems such a nice place... at least it would be if it wasn't for the bloody Sloanes pouring out of the restaurants at closing time.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:19 AM

Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious: "Oh look at me, I'm a virgin".

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:21 AM

Never mind 'Wazzock?'. 'Virgin?'

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:23 AM

"I think you'll find that most of the posters here are guests, in fact I suspect the whole thing is a wind-up."

Yes, but how do we know? We might be offending someone, I think this thread should be closed NOW!!!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Dorothy Frottage
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:28 AM

Hi! I've just dropped in to stir up some shit. I'll post again in a minute under a different GUEST identity, that way you'll never suspect it's me!!! Tee hee!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:29 AM

"Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious"

theleveller, you really are a complete twat - why do't you just fuck off (all three of you)?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Member of Bulboushead
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:36 AM

>>>Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious: "Oh look at me, I'm a virgin".<<<

My band Bulboushead was at Blitherscrum and we were great! I'm going to tell my mum on you lot then you'll be sorry.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Manitas_at_home
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:38 AM

This thread wasn't meant to be anbout you... until now!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:41 AM

Maidenheads plural with a m. Not Maidenhead single with a M. I wanted to call my dog Maidenhead on the grounds that Maidenhead Berks.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:42 AM

They're all berks in Maidenhead. They should all fuck off.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Backwoodsman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:45 AM

"Maidenheads are so bloody pretentious: "Oh look at me, I'm a virgin". "

My wife's a Born-Again Virgin. She says virgins are shit, especially virgins from Blitherscrum and Maidenhead.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:48 AM

"loads of beardy wazzocks singing old bloody songs"

Are we using the 1954 definition of wazzock here or the hyphen-wazzock derivation, as in nu-wazzock, psych-wazzock or wazzock-rock?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:52 AM

"My wife's a Born-Again Virgin."

You should try some of that Niagara - belting.

Eyup, we've gone below the belt now. How BS is that?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,wazzock police
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 11:53 AM

'Are we using the 1954 definition of wazzock here or the hyphen-wazzock derivation, as in nu-wazzock, psych-wazzock or wazzock-rock?'

Ello ello ello, wots all this then?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:07 PM

LOL!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:08 PM

The On-Line Slang Dictionary defines a wazzock as "an idiot; an annoyingly stupid person".

Thus the term may not be entirely appertinant to Bitherscrum, other than at festival time.

BTW., it should be distinguished from wazzcocker, which is a noun meaning "Someone who likes to go and get wasted". Now that, I would have thought is a perfect summation of the Blitherscrum Festival regulars, bearded or not.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:10 PM

"bearded or not."

Don't be silly!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Pencil Beard
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:12 PM

And how about that bloody duo Sod Outage and Jimmy Oar? Who did they come as? That blatant refusal to take any risks WHATSOEVER with their so called "grime" and "dubstep" is a friggin' crime against folk music, so it is. And I bet they can't even grow a beard. Between them. Even a wilfully experimental one.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:12 PM

What's silly about that? Even the women at Blitherscrum have beards. Any more of this and I'll come and knock your eye out.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:16 PM

I'm sick of all this crap. I'm leaving - for good!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Mr. Parsnip
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:17 PM

Pish and tush! I'm not denying that some wazzocks may be beardy and that some beardys might be wazzocks, but not all of them sing old bloody songs and stuff at Blitherscrum!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:17 PM

Did you miss me?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:18 PM

"Even the women at Blitherscrum have beards"

Precisely.

But if you want to make something of it pal .......... I'll see you outside the Old Black Cock!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Ewan Mcoll
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:19 PM

Err...

Can anyone lend me a razor?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 12:21 PM

I'll tell you something else about the Blitherscrum crowd. Some of them are keg beer fiends. Many a time I've been stood at the beer tent wondering whether to have the Dogs Ballox, or the Farmers Faeces when a voice behind me has said "wot? no firkin keg?"

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Tim Leaning
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 01:47 PM

If these guests were at my house I would be nervous too.
See that Virgin Airways?
Run by a beardy wazzock! and what use is a virgin in one o them airoplane toilet?
Unless they got a beard of course.
I was saying to one o them mellow head fiddlers its all very well mate but you young uns should be writing new folks songs not singing all this old shit . you should just let it die and make some new ones while you wait for your ironic wazzock beard to grow.
That Blitherscrum is shite it is.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Arthur_itus
Date: 13 Oct 10 - 04:56 PM

I heard that Blitherscrum is to allow doggers and cottagers at their functions in future, becuase the police will protect them against the wazzocks and therefore they will have police prescence for nowt.

Tight fisted gits.

Is this Tim Leaning the organiser of Blitherscum?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 03:17 AM

I think you're all shite. I'm off to talk to some proper wazzocks on that fRoots board.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 03:45 AM

WTF is a blitherscrum anyway? Sounds like some sort of rugby manoeuvre ...."right lads, let's go for the blitherscrum, then throw a reverse shrewsbury with a double shepley.....a short cropredy round the flank and we're there – straight into the sidmouth".

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 04:06 AM

Leveller, you're a right flanker!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Stu
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 04:23 AM

Reminds me of that Phillip Larkin poem:

Blitherscum, Blitherscum,
with your beardy wazzocks
singing,
you are
shit.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 04:28 AM

I love this thread!

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: GUEST,Beardybanjiman
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 06:06 AM

"Is this Tim Leaning the organiser of Blitherscum?"

I hope not, it'll just be full of sniggysnoggy wazzocks with their painful insights into the worlds problems and songs written after the 13th century. Some of them choruses will be catchy enough to singalong to.

Won't be no room for 97 verse ballads nor shanties (sung without harmonies of course).

People might even enjoy themselves.....

That'd be shit.

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: Fred McCormick
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 08:15 AM

I'll tell you something else and all. Their singarounds are crap. I haven't been to one yet without somebody's sung:

"It fell about the Marmitemas,
When the leaves were sweetly blooming.
That he promised he'd take me up to the north lands.
Hey with a gay and a grinding."

Who wants to listen to that?

Subject: RE: That Blitherscrum? thats shit that is.
From: theleveller
Date: 14 Oct 10 - 08:23 AM

Well, that can't be a proper traddie wazzock song because they always start with "As I walked out one May morning on Radcliffe Highway", and end with someone getting shagged or killed (or both) - othewrwise it's not authentic