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Secret of Life - Part II

Michael K. 10 Sep 99 - 11:34 AM
Bert 10 Sep 99 - 11:59 AM
katlaughing 10 Sep 99 - 12:50 PM
Lonesome EJ 10 Sep 99 - 02:18 PM
Roger in Baltimore 10 Sep 99 - 03:23 PM
Bev and Jerry 11 Sep 99 - 02:30 PM
Bill D 11 Sep 99 - 05:54 PM
Bill D 11 Sep 99 - 05:57 PM
Bev and Jerry 12 Sep 99 - 05:08 PM
katlaughing 12 Sep 99 - 05:24 PM
WyoWoman 12 Sep 99 - 05:55 PM
Bill D 12 Sep 99 - 07:57 PM
Celtic-End Singer 12 Sep 99 - 08:15 PM
phil jl 12 Sep 99 - 08:37 PM
phil jl 12 Sep 99 - 08:56 PM
Bill D 12 Sep 99 - 09:10 PM
Big Mick 12 Sep 99 - 09:19 PM
Bill D 12 Sep 99 - 09:23 PM
WyoWoman 12 Sep 99 - 10:32 PM
raredance 12 Sep 99 - 10:44 PM
Art Thieme 13 Sep 99 - 01:42 PM
Allan C. 13 Sep 99 - 01:57 PM
Jeri 13 Sep 99 - 02:24 PM
Bert 13 Sep 99 - 02:28 PM
Penny S. 14 Sep 99 - 05:12 PM
Peter T. 14 Sep 99 - 05:30 PM
Easy Rider 15 Sep 99 - 09:55 AM
Lonesome EJ 17 Feb 00 - 04:36 PM
katlaughing 17 Feb 00 - 05:15 PM
GUEST 17 Feb 00 - 07:34 PM
Amos 17 Feb 00 - 08:42 PM
Sorcha 17 Feb 00 - 08:48 PM
Troll 17 Feb 00 - 09:53 PM
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Subject: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Michael K.
Date: 10 Sep 99 - 11:34 AM

(By the way, I thought Catspaw49's response, in the original thread was brilliant!)

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? (Part II)

Machiavelli: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The ends of crossing the road justify whatever motive there was.

L.A. Police Department: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.

Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not cross the road.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken nature.

Carl Jung: The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and,therefore, synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being.

John Locke: Because he was exercising his natural right to liberty.

Albert Camus: It doesn't matter; the chicken's actions have no meaning except to him.

Scully: It was a simple bio-mechanical reflex that is commonly found in chickens.

Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.

Oliver Stone: The question is not 'Why did the chicken cross the road?' but is rather 'Who was crossing the road at the same time whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?'

Jerry Seinfeld: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, 'What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?'

Immanuel Kant: The chicken, being an autonomous being, chose to cross the road of his own free will.

Plato: For the greater good.

Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.

Jean-Paul Sartre: In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken found it necessary to cross the road.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

The Sphinx: You tell me.

O.J.: It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bert
Date: 10 Sep 99 - 11:59 AM

George Bush - Read my lips The chicken did not cross the road.

Neil Bush - To get to Silverado

Why did the Mudcat chicken cross the road? To get to the Grits thread.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: katlaughing
Date: 10 Sep 99 - 12:50 PM

Mae West: I told it to come see me, sometime!

Valley Girl: Like ya know, it was like really weird, ya know, but, well, it ah, let's see, uh.....what was the question?

Yankee: it couldn't get theyuh from heyuh, ayuh.

Andy Williams: to dream the impossible dream.

Senator (take yer pick): well, my learned colleague failed to approve the most efficient, tax-cutting bill of this century. This bill could've saved every American a ton of money and put a chicken in every pot. Now, due to my esteemed colleague's short-sighted policies, the chicken is free to cross the road, anytimne at all, while millions of our fellow Americans go to bed hungry, wondering why their elected officials have let them down. Come the next election, they will remember, I and my party did not want to let the chicken cross the road.

Buddha: to embrace suffering,(no chicken feed on the other side of the road); letting go of all wordly concerns. Knowing that suffering is a part of life; a path to spiritual nirvana.

Fundamentalist (NOI): to be sayuhved, Brother, to be sayuhved, in the bosom of our lord, for the light of our savior shines brightest on the right side of the road and our little brother, little Chicken Little, saw that light, praise be!

Basta!

kat


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 10 Sep 99 - 02:18 PM

ANTONIO CARLOS JOBIM:
Tall and sleek and plump and tasty
The Hen from Ipanema goes walking
And when she crosses
Each puzzle-solver goes "hmmmm..."

When she moves so quick and jerky
that's when you know that she's no turkey
but when she crosses
each one she passes goes "...hmmm"

So the enigma continues
Avoiding a spot on our menus
She flaunts her mysterious venues
And each day she still crosses the street
her motives completely discreet

Tall and sleek and plump and tasty
The Hen from Ipanema goes walking
And when she passes
I ponder her destiny
what a sweet fricassee
she'd feed a family of three....

LEJ


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 10 Sep 99 - 03:23 PM

LEJ,

Wonderful! Makes me want to learn all those jazzy chords to sing this silly song! I remain constantly amazed at the creativity amongst Mudcatters.

Roger in Baltimore


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bev and Jerry
Date: 11 Sep 99 - 02:30 PM

JAMES WATT

If you've seen one chicken, you've seen them all.

JFK

Ich bin ein chicken

TEDDY ROOSEVELT

Speak softly and carry a big chicken


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Sep 99 - 05:54 PM

M C Escher: There is no other side to the road...not only that, the chicken cannot even go along the road without coming back again."

(Lordy, I'd like to SEE this with chickens!)


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Sep 99 - 05:57 PM

*sigh*...try again, Bill...and this time, put in the link...

M C Escher: There is no other side to the road...not only that, the chicken cannot even go along the road without coming back again."

(Lordy, I'd like to SEE this with chickens!)


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bev and Jerry
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 05:08 PM

I been a-crossing that Lincoln Highway,
I thought you knowed;
I been a-crossing that Sixty-six,
Way down the road.
Heavy load and a worried mind,
Lookin' for a chicken that's hard to find,
I been havin' some hard travelin', Lord

Bev and Jerry


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: katlaughing
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 05:24 PM

Bill! I love the Escher! Great stuff!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was all in his head.

OR: he didn't. It was all in your head.

katlaughng


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: WyoWoman
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 05:55 PM

Why did the psychic cross the road?

She was CHANNELING A CHICKEN!!!!!

ww


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 07:57 PM

well, when no one is looking, a hustling chicken can avoid chicken soup one more day!


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Celtic-End Singer
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 08:15 PM

Tony Blair: It had to reassess which side of the road it wanted to be on. Those old ideas of being on the other side of the road just aren't possible in today's modern economy.

Any Tory: Because the chicken had to learn to cross the road itself. It's no good carrying the chicken across the road, otherwise it'll just get lazy.

Sinn Fein spokesman: It actually took two chickens. One to cross the road and the other to claim responsibility


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: phil jl
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 08:37 PM

I'm unsure about some of the words in the song Danny Farrell. They are hard to understand in the Dubliner's recording and those in the database don't seem to quite make sense. Perhaps someone at Mudcat can help me.

In the second line of the first verse. What are 'worriors' ?

Last line, first verse. Should '..his travelling evil's clan' be '..the travelling people's plan' ?

Second line of chorus. Should '.. people please hater' be 'people's police hater'

Third line of chorus. What is a 'gorier' ?

Second and third lines of second verse. The words in the DB don't seem right.

Last line, third verse. Should '..takers' be '..tinkers'

Thanks for a very interesting web site

Phil


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: phil jl
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 08:56 PM

Sorry for my posting to this thread. This is the first time I have posted to Mudcat and even though I went through the steps carefully I still clicked on submit instead of clear when I found I had pasted my request into the wrong window.

I have now posted into a new thread.

Thank, Phil


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 09:10 PM

Slow Chicken: "They make those damn roads too wide; that guy in the last pic has an unfair advantage...but at least it's warm on this side..."


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Big Mick
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 09:19 PM

Shit, Bill, you have got to stop. You are killing me, man!!!! I had no more than stopped laughing over the first pic and I see the second one. ...........LMAO

Big Mick


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 09:23 PM

*grin*....awww...you say the NICEST things, Mick...


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: WyoWoman
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 10:32 PM

That second one is obsceeeeen.

Poor Phil -- wandering in to the Secret of Life on his first visit to the 'Cat.

Welcome, Phil -- I'd like to say it isn't usually this nutty, but, well, as a former Girl Sprout, I feel honor bound to tell the truth. Sometimes, it's completely insane here. BUT -- you can almost always find someone to actually help you with music-related questions, in addition to meeting all your chicken-joke needs.

Someone should head over to the Tavern. Poor 'Spaw is wandering around in there by himself, bumping into Doors.

WyoWoman


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: raredance
Date: 12 Sep 99 - 10:44 PM

He was chasing a VW Beetle but when he got to the other side he had a sever case of the chicken car gone blues.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Art Thieme
Date: 13 Sep 99 - 01:42 PM

He'd run out of condoms & the drug store was over there.

Art


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Allan C.
Date: 13 Sep 99 - 01:57 PM

condom = Bobbit baggie


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Jeri
Date: 13 Sep 99 - 02:24 PM

The ones with the spermicide noneggsatall 9. They prevent chirpies, and no will have to ask which came first.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Bert
Date: 13 Sep 99 - 02:28 PM

Hey Bill D! Those ants are walking ALONG the road. Of course if the chicken 'were' to cross a Mobius Road then it still wouldn't get to the other side! Hmmm.

Bert.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Penny S.
Date: 14 Sep 99 - 05:12 PM

I heard a Max Miller version once which sounded as though it might be an original - for some foul reason. The sort of joke which need to be sent up by changing to the well known version. The sort which might come from some Tudor book of Merry Jests.

Penny


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Peter T.
Date: 14 Sep 99 - 05:30 PM

Just caught up with LEJ's Jobim, what a laugh!
yours, Peter T.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Easy Rider
Date: 15 Sep 99 - 09:55 AM

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

MICHAEL K: She was on a quest for a superb vintage 1950 Martin Dreadnought.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 04:36 PM

this was a fun thread, but I have an alterior motive for refreshing it. I want to enter "Hen from Ipanema" in Aine/Kat's Song Challenge #8. Yeah, I know it's Brazil and not England...


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: katlaughing
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 05:15 PM

So, copy and paste to the challenge thread, mon LeeJ! It's a worthy entry!**BG**


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: GUEST
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 07:34 PM

What nonsense! Because the rooster was on the other side.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Amos
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 08:42 PM

Sexist Pig Slanders Honor, Intellect and Self Determination of Chicken
Sow Says She'll Handle It!
Story at 5:00.


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Sorcha
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 08:48 PM

GOOD GRIEF, CHARLIE BROWN!


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Subject: RE: Secret of Life - Part II
From: Troll
Date: 17 Feb 00 - 09:53 PM

I always thought that the chicken crossed the road 'cause it was the possums day off.

troll


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