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MudCat Tavern - Round 12

MMario 23 Sep 99 - 09:59 AM
Bert 23 Sep 99 - 10:25 AM
MMario 23 Sep 99 - 11:04 AM
Mían 23 Sep 99 - 01:00 PM
MMario 23 Sep 99 - 02:02 PM
Mían 23 Sep 99 - 02:50 PM
Lonesome EJ 23 Sep 99 - 04:02 PM
MMario 23 Sep 99 - 04:24 PM
Mían 23 Sep 99 - 06:48 PM
Susan A-R 23 Sep 99 - 10:59 PM
catspaw49 24 Sep 99 - 12:06 AM
katlaughing 24 Sep 99 - 12:48 AM
Mían 24 Sep 99 - 12:34 PM
MMario 24 Sep 99 - 12:46 PM
paddymac 24 Sep 99 - 01:41 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Sep 99 - 02:04 PM
Mían 24 Sep 99 - 02:18 PM
MMario 24 Sep 99 - 02:58 PM
Big Mick 24 Sep 99 - 07:05 PM
Mían 24 Sep 99 - 07:40 PM
catspaw49 24 Sep 99 - 08:00 PM
Mían 24 Sep 99 - 08:13 PM
Susan A-R 24 Sep 99 - 08:23 PM
harpgirl 24 Sep 99 - 08:33 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Sep 99 - 08:46 PM
harpgirl 24 Sep 99 - 09:10 PM
24 Sep 99 - 09:30 PM
Jeri 24 Sep 99 - 10:52 PM
Cap't Bob 24 Sep 99 - 11:50 PM
Quirk Malarkey 25 Sep 99 - 12:18 AM
Quirk Malarkey 25 Sep 99 - 12:22 AM
25 Sep 99 - 09:51 AM
DougR 25 Sep 99 - 01:17 PM
Lonesome EJ 25 Sep 99 - 03:24 PM
Dave Swan 25 Sep 99 - 05:16 PM
bseed(charleskratz) 25 Sep 99 - 05:30 PM
bbc 25 Sep 99 - 05:57 PM
catspaw49 25 Sep 99 - 06:48 PM
bseed(charleskratz) 25 Sep 99 - 07:37 PM
Dave Swan 25 Sep 99 - 08:10 PM
Jeri 25 Sep 99 - 08:31 PM
Jeri 25 Sep 99 - 09:11 PM
Joe Offer 26 Sep 99 - 04:04 AM
Neil Lowe 26 Sep 99 - 08:37 AM
Jeri 26 Sep 99 - 09:29 AM
_gargoyle 26 Sep 99 - 11:46 PM
WyoWoman 27 Sep 99 - 12:46 AM
MMario 27 Sep 99 - 08:34 AM
Neil Lowe 27 Sep 99 - 08:36 AM
katlaughing 27 Sep 99 - 09:49 AM
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Subject: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 09:59 AM

just moving the Tavern to a new location--the neighborhood was beginning to get crowded.

Older threads are here

Information below was stolen from Jeri, fair und square. -Joe Offer-

I have to mow the lawn, which explains why I just spent a chunk of time compiling all the virtual boozing threads into one handy little table. It also has a link to this thread, in case you can't remember where you are...

THE VIRTUAL MUDCAT TAVERN/PUB
Mudcat Tavern
Mudcat Tavern -- Round 2
Mudcat Tavern -- Round 3!
Mudcat Tavern- Round FOUR!!
Mudcat Tavern - Round 5
Mudcat Tavern - Round 6
MudCat Tavern - Round 7
Mudcat Pub - Round 8
Mudcat Tavern -Round 9
RE- Mudcat Tavern - Round 10
Mudcat Tavern - Round 11
MudCat Tavern - Round 12


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Bert
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 10:25 AM

Then you get to buy the first round. I couldn't move us 'cos you bleeders av gorn an spent all me beezan.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 11:04 AM

Bert - considering how we've all been drinkin' on your tab for quite a while now....I guess I can stand you a round. But only one, mind you....I'm a civil servant...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 01:00 PM

only one round? how civil can you be? :-)


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 02:02 PM

Mian - I am REMARKABLY civil for someone who is currently supporting 47 school districts networks (over 11,000 workstations, 400+ servers) over the phone - - Can you smile and say: Your computer is dead? When you turn it on, what happens? No power light? Is it plugged in? no, that's your network cable. Yes, it needs electricity.....You're having a power outage? That would explain why your computer isn't working. Thank you. Have a nice day"

I'm going to take some tawny port out to the BBQ pit and watch flames for a bit...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 02:50 PM

she takes up a flask of mead and joins him. she puts her feet up to relax. she sticks them in the firepit by mistake. the resulting sound reveals a new form of ...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 04:02 PM

Bert, everybody, great news! VISA has upped Bert's credit limit to 2500 simoleans. Heck, the House will even stand a round of drinks in salute to our good friend's sterling credit! Order up!


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 04:24 PM

WOW! 2500 simoleans! Lessee, if I remember, the current exchange rate is 1 simolean is 256.314159 antedeluvian arkbits, and an arkbit is 6.66 phonetican sylabuls and a sylabul is worth 1000 whurds. Anyone know what the exchange rate of whurds for dollars is? Or since his credit is sterling, maybe we should figure it in pounds? *grin*

Mian - are you done playing in the fire pit? I wanna roast some chestnuts....


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 06:48 PM

I will have a shot of 12 (no, not 18 but thanks fer askin) yr old MacAllan (hic, MacCallan) if you do not mind, good slur. uh, sir. what? oh, neat. thank you sandmatch. so much. it will taste good with those token rings frying up on the barby. hand that over gently, gently. All my paws are scorched.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Susan A-R
Date: 23 Sep 99 - 10:59 PM

Rats! I missed Mick's grand entrance, a tavern-moving, and a foot scorching, and a round on Bert and a round on MMario, and all, Well, I'm awake now and will await events. Not awake enough yet to set 'em in motion.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 12:06 AM

Hey group.What's up besides Bert's credit limit.......Tell you what Bert, to celebrate I'll buy you one...hell, how about a round for the joint...HEY LEEJ, you still got that jug I brought back from down Rockcastle county? Pour everybody a Mason jar of that stuff...y'all love it, REALLY SMOOTH.........uh keep it away from the firepit Mian or you're gonna' have a lot more scorched than paws!.........AHHHHH, mighty fine ain't it?.......uh, Mario...help Bert up off the floor...Lemmee smell yours a second Bert........LEEJ, You Cheap Fockin' Detective!!!..You gave Bert that stuff that Cletus and Paw brewed up in that Peterbilt radiator!!!...SusAR, do you think you could drop Bert at the ER on your way home? It'll be Okay Bert...just a quick stomach pump and you'll be right as rain in a few weeks...........Bye now.............Damn Leej, I shoulda' figured....typical briarhopper humor.........was kinda' funny though the way he hit the floor like a sack of spuds.........And speaking of which, seen Mick the Spud?......I gotta' head on out........Keep an eye on Mian around that firepit with that jar of 'Shine................

Spaw


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 12:48 AM

bbc, thanks for the hint.....Moonchild, gorgeous picture!


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 12:34 PM

she wakes up wondering where the el...? an old fella comes in, leans over & whispers, "stick to the Cratur, the best thing in nature, for sinking yer sorrows and raising yer joys..."


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 12:46 PM

THAT's the song I was trying to think of the other day! Thank YOU!

gee--green flames....how'd that happen...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: paddymac
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 01:41 PM

WAIT! WAIT! SusAR - you can't leave with giving us a party piece. How 'bout some more of those wonderful dulcet words. Sombeiody pass that damn jug oveer this way so I can really appreciate SusAR's words.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 02:04 PM

A guy was hitch-hiking through Rockcastle County Kentucky, when a battered old Ford pick-up pulled over. He ran up to the open passenger door and was shocked to see a toothless farmer pointing a double-barrel at him. " Git in," said the farmer, who proceeded to turn off the main road onto a rutted gravel track that wound up and over a ridge. The farmer finally stopped in a clearing, where he pulled off a cover of leaves and branches, exposing a still. Next to the still was a cracked gallon jug, which the farmer filled from the tap on the cooking kettle. He held it out to the hitch-hiker, who took it with some reluctance. The farmer clicked off the safety on the scattergun, and pointed it at the poor guy's head. " Drink, " he ordered.

The guy took a big slug of something that tasted like a cross between isopropyl alcohol and varnish, and found himself flat on his back staring at an interesting array of pops, flashes and shimmering stars in the air all around him. Finally, the farmer nudged him, taking the jug from him and handing him the shotgun.

" Now," he said. " You hold the gun on me while I take a drink."


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 02:18 PM

what the hell is Cratur anyway?


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 02:58 PM

I've heard two explanations for this....

1) it is a mangling of the phrase "wee drop o' the creature"

2) it refers to "crater" --a cup/bowl/mazer/goblet/glass for holding beverage type thingie


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Big Mick
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 07:05 PM

#1 above is correct except in the use of the word "mangle". It is the word creature which is a slang term for whiskey pronounced with certain Irish brogues. MMario's knees would be in trouble calling this "mangling" in certain pubs I hang in..........LOL.....

Big Mick who loves a drop o' the pure himself now and again.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 07:40 PM

now, gentlemen, would the creature be poteen or manufactured in a distillery, LTD ... or could both versions be critters? craturs, The Creature, featured creatures, Creature Features... (mumble mumble thud)

eh? did somebody say something?


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 08:00 PM

Hey group....Just stopped by to say I found Cleigh finally....Took him outa' that guy'a car just out of Gulfport.............I gotta' get home 'cause I think that Cletus is helping himself to the computer everytime I leave.........I got to run out for a few hours and I'm atraid he'll keep sneakin' back in and messing around....And after that deal at Jeri's place, I know I can't leave Cleigh with him anymore...........Anybody seen Bert? How's he doing?..........Damn but if Mian don't look bad...shitfaced as hell ain't she.....Leej, I'd watch her around that firepit...And what the hell is it that she's cooking on that spit Leej?........damn, but the smell would knock a buzzard off a shitwagon!!! What is..........uh..hmmmm......say there Leej....Uh yeah man, let me ask you.........What happened to that fourth flamingo?....Well 'cause I don't see it and...aw forget it........See you later .................oy..................

Spaw


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Mían
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 08:13 PM

mumble mumble thud



she begins to dream in html format...
she wakes up in the session tent in Sebastopol on Saturday and has a vague feeling she has been somewhere else the last cupla days...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Susan A-R
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 08:23 PM

What words?? Geeze, I keep missing important things. Say Spaw, I had a hell of a time gettin' Bert to the ER, ya see I don't drive, so I hoisted him up over my shoulders and carried hom off. Got some mighty strange looks too. Say Bert, I know that this is a personal question, but what do you weigh anyway??

I have had moonshine once, and it was smooth, and once was enough.

So'm I supposed to do a Party Piece?? like, um the Story that I Started at the Kirk Soire?? If so, maybe I will try a bit of that, no, no, I won't take it lying down.

Just a bit of the black vile stuff and I'll be ready . .

When first to the town I came for to stop I started up in business in my side street shop To the Kirk every Sunday I gaed twice as a rule And counted the collection for the Sunday school But my greatest ambition it was you see To tell a wee bit story at a Kirk Soire.

I think I'll go and have another Black Vile before our hero meets his comeuppance.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: harpgirl
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 08:33 PM

yeah Susan, Pat (PaddyMac) and I were out last Friday night singing with the premiere Pan pipe player (say that fast ten times) in town and a few others of our friends and one of his party pieces is "Blarney Roses". I also asked for "Why Paddy's Not at Work Today" He'll do almost anything if you wink at him and fill his glass...and I mean anything!!!harpgirl


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 08:46 PM

Well, Cats, I was somewhat doubtful when Mian said she had a pink turkey she wanted to roast, but I figured hell, it's the Mudcat. Still, I 've never seen any kind of turkey, no matter what the shade, whose legs bent backwards. She explained she had run over it with her truck, and like a fool, I believed her.

NEW RULE The fauna dwelling in and around the Tavern are not meant for the consumption of the guests!


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: harpgirl
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 09:10 PM

...Leej, does that mean we CAN consume the flora????


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From:
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 09:30 PM

Driving home this evening I had one of those wierd tricks of perspective your snses sometimes indulge in. As I crested the rise, instead of the view appearing to be the normal one across the valley, the sunset and clouds combined for a moment to make it look as if I was gazing out over an ocean bay, with islands scattered about, waves braking against their shores. It was momentary, but magical. Made me think of the door at the Tavern....


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Jeri
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 10:52 PM

Well, I had one hell of a day. Walked into an interview, walked out with a job. Went to the regular session which was anything but. Jeff Warner (who's a regular) brought Louis Killen, and we made the rafters to ring. One of the regulars has a tuner with a sound level meter on it. We topped 105 dB, acapella! I'd really appreciate a pint of the vile black stuff and a pink turkey sandwich.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Cap't Bob
Date: 24 Sep 99 - 11:50 PM

Oh no not again~~~~ that forth flamingo was probably my pet crow up to his old tricks again, mainly of getting into trouble ~ he must have found that can of pink paint back of the bar. Mian wouldn't have any luck trying to cook up that old crow ~~ he's used to being in hot water.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Quirk Malarkey
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 12:18 AM

the last time i confronted the oracle i was transported to a village. since this looks like a friendly place i would give up my marinade for crow and stand the bar a drink !


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Quirk Malarkey
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 12:22 AM

oh! and need a bar bodhran player ?


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From:
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 09:51 AM

sorry, not unless you can double as a tiple player...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: DougR
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 01:17 PM

Doesn't anybody drink around here anymore? bbc,lass, a Black and Tan if you please. I'm assuming you put the school work aside for the weekend. Though I guess that isn't necessarily so. My daughter teaches and I think she is as busy with school work on weekends as she is with school kids during the week. School teachers are the most under-appreciated folks in our society, I believe, and certainly the most under-paid!

DougR


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 03:24 PM

Hey, doodlezak, thanks for standing the bar a round! Please be careful where you point that bodhran, though. We've had several nasty accidents involving those things.:>}


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Dave Swan
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 05:16 PM

So your man stumbles into his local. His eyes are crosses, teeth are out, there's a split across the bridge of his misshapen nose. In a barely audible voice he mumbles his request for a pint.

"God, man, who did this to you?" asks the concerned and interested bartender.

"I'm after Tim Riley doing this to me" says your fella.

"Tim Riley ? Riley's a wee man, he couldn't have done this to you."

"Well," says your boy "he had a shovel in his hand, didn't he?"

The man behind the mahogany is aghast. "Riley had a shovel in his hand? And what did you have in yours?"

"Mrs. Riley's breast, but it's not much good in a fight."

And that, LEJ, is why I wanted to call our last cat Mrs. Riley's Breast. When he arrived on the doorstep he was short of his origial issue of teeth, toenails, fur and skin. Now he's healed and just grateful to have a job, sir. Great cat. Guess he really didn't need a handle like Mrs. Riley's Breast, but I did want to hear his name called by our vet's receptionist. Or to answer the question when someone in the vet's office asked the good natured question "What have you got in the box?"

Anyhow, a pint please. And if there's anything on the beer engine, that's me. Cheers, E.S.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 05:30 PM

Dave, good to see you back in the pub, and thanks to the missus for the pint of real (not cyber) ale the other night. I still haven't cracked open the SOBs' CD, but then I have a bunch of 'em I've bought recently, and I keep breaking my fingernails trying to get the damned things open. Which reminds me, Dan Milner's is sitting here unopened but highly anticipated, both because of the great house concert in Davis and all the glowing reviews in the thread announcing its release. Oh, to be in New York in February! --seed


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: bbc
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 05:57 PM

Ah, Doug, you're the only one I'm still serving drinks to. Yes, I put the schoolwork aside & did housework all day long. This is the 1st time I've sat down today. And I still have the schoolwork to do! Let's lift one w/ Jeri, though. That is really great news about the job. I hope I'll get details?! Neil, I will do my best to have a word w/ you soon! How about a drink in the meantime?

bbc


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: catspaw49
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 06:48 PM

Jer!!!!I'll buy a round for the house no matter who shows up.....CONGRATS!!! Get the good shine out Leej and Beebs, put on the safety glasses and get out the mason jars.........Everybody drinks...and no more of that other stuff Leej....I ain't seen Bert and I'm getting real worried that that stuff you gave him mighta' done him a serious injury........Thanks Beebs......hey Leej, don't give anymore of this stuff to Mian.....I think it's what cost us one of lamarca's flamingos!!! ........Hey .. El Swanno!!!! Fix my gorillla/fishnet clad friend here with some of that Corn.......you ain;t SEEN blue flames til you ignite a "Shine Rip" .......Oh hell Seed, go ahead and drink it man......you and I don't have enough gray matter cells left to cover a frog's ass anyway..................So what's the job Jeri???...Got anything to do with dragonflies, clams, feet, or hooters?.................Don't matter...Ol Spaw's just real happy for you (really!)...........Gotta go get the supper on the table....Bkack Walnut Pork Roast, acorn squash with hazelnut/apple compote, and 2-day cooked pintos with Apple Cobbler for dessert....Fall food.............later gang.......

Spaw


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 07:37 PM

Mian, would you happen to know Barney Brown, owner of Copperfield's books in Sebastopol and Santa Rosa? An old friend of mine. And is the Saturday tent session in Sebastopol a regular weekly, monthly, annual thing? --seed


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Dave Swan
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 08:10 PM

Jeri,

Congrats on the job, but aren't you supposed to be RETIRED ? If you're unclear on the loafing around doing nothing concept, see me for lessons and a free lecture/demonstration. I've got it down cold. ..WOW 'spaw, you're right. Gonna have to get me a gorilla suit with Nomex hairs, or tell folks I'm a mandrill in gorilla's clothing. bbc, have you got some dry ice I can sit on? Cheers, E.S.


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Jeri
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 08:31 PM

Ok, ok, it's a customer service telephone (no "cold" calling - couldn't stand that) job with a home improvement (windows & siding) co. Nothing fancy, but it's a small office where everybody gets along and wears jeans to work.

So, was anyone at all jealous that Louie Killen showed up at the session? I can't honestly think of a non-Mudcat performer I'd rather see walk through the door.

Shine, 'Spaw? You trying to kill my last brain cell?


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Jeri
Date: 25 Sep 99 - 09:11 PM

And Dave, I'm retired from the military. Ya can't live on that!


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Joe Offer
Date: 26 Sep 99 - 04:04 AM

Well, Jeri, I don't spend much time in bars, but I stopped in to make sure you weren't offended that I stole your clicky-thing table. Congratulations on the job.
and yes, I'm jealous that Lou Killen and Jeff Warner were at your session. Heck, the best-known person who shows up at the Sacramento session I attend is a guy named Joe Offer who sings camp songs.
-Joe Offer-


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Neil Lowe
Date: 26 Sep 99 - 08:37 AM

Hey, bbc! Welcome back! Glad you finally got to take a (small) break. God knows you deserve it. But as much virtual alcohol as gets consumed around this place...if that's your idea of a break, then I'll have Turkey rocks, make it a double. *BG*

Good to see you back in the Tavern.

Regards, Neil


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Jeri
Date: 26 Sep 99 - 09:29 AM

Joe, you can steal my clicky-thing tables whenever you want. You can leave off the part about avoiding the mowing of the lawn, though. :-)

Three part harmony on SPANISH LADIES with the first tune listed (minor key) being sung in three part harmony by Jeff, Lou, and Bruce, (who's been singing with Jeff a lot lately and is the guy who's been helping me with my voice) and the rest of us joining in on the 105 dB chorus. I will eventually shut up about this, but it was one of those magical nights you just don't want to get over...


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: _gargoyle
Date: 26 Sep 99 - 11:46 PM

Cat----Pause

I'm sittin' on the stool in the corner

Ya....still buyin'?


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: WyoWoman
Date: 27 Sep 99 - 12:46 AM

I've been sittin' in the dark for four hours because the electricity suddenly died in my neck o' the woods. Bereft of 'lecktricity, all I could do was light candles and play guitar. I'm so discouraged. I don't have time to play on a daily basis and it seems that my progress is absolutely infinitesimal... I AM making something that sounds like music a little bit, but I want to WAIL!!!

So, ker-app. Think I'll have myself a touch of Mr. Jameson's finest and see who's around here to commiserate. Who's barkeep tonight -- or are we on the honor system again?

WW


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: MMario
Date: 27 Sep 99 - 08:34 AM

Wyo - if I'd had to sit for four hours in the dark I WOULS have wailed - one way or the other.....*grin*


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: Neil Lowe
Date: 27 Sep 99 - 08:36 AM

It's a little late (or early, depending) but hey, I'll commiserate. Turkey rocks, barkeep, thank you. Sounds like you had the perfect ambiance for a music session...was there lightning, thunder, wind and rain also? Weather permitting I like to go outside on the front or back porch and serenade the neighbors, dogs, cats, what-have-you.

Don't be too discouraged. Progress does indeed come slow, it seems...I've been plunking away for nigh on 30 years off and on, and I haven't progressed much farther than the three-chord song....well, maybe I'm not the best one to be commiserating with you, on second thought (ahem)....hey, don't pay me no nevermind, do you know how many songs only have three chords? Billions...virtually all blues tunes, as well as lots of Country & Western and Bluegrass tunes, folk tunes too...and rock tunes...well, hell, nearly all songs have only three chords. Sometimes a song has only two...one in particular that readily comes to mind is a Hank Williams tune whose name eludes me at the moment,(Leej?) but it goes..."and that's all she wrote (Dear John)...I've sent your saddle home." Two chords. And sometimes only (count 'em) one. Really. One chord. John Lee Hooker does a tune about the Tupelo, Mississippi flood (blues enthusiasts, I apologize if I've got the location wrong)...one chord, probably E.

When I was having trouble changing chords fast enough, I'd try to think about something else while trying to play as slow as necessary to keep a steady rhythm while changing chords. Doesn't matter what you think about...I'd think about someone I hadn't seen in a long time, or a place I'd been to, and do the chord changes without trying to think about it. Seemed to help me with the speed, sort of along the lines of concentrating too hard gets in the way of progress.....

Then for me too what helped was to get out my little battery powered cassette player and play along with songs that sounded like they'd be easy to play. Like the one chord and two chord gems mentioned above. Then I could delude myself thusly: "Hey, I can play like John Lee Hooker and Hank Williams!" It would work for a little while.

And lastly, I'd try to make up my own stuff. That's the fun part. Trying to invent chords, twisting my fingers into pretzels, making up songs and verses...playing a chord and lifting one of my fingers to see how that changed the sound..playing games.

I can sympathize with you on the progress thing, really. But this time next year, I guarantee you'll be amazed at the progress you've made. I know it's hard to find time to practice...I try to play a little at least every day, even if it's only for 15 minutes. You'd be surprised even with that small amount of time how much it helps. And too , it seems like there's barriers that have to be broken through...seems as though you slog along forever, never seeming to make any progress, then one day....you wake up and boom! you suddenly can make that difficult chord change you've been practicing forever. Then you're on cloud 9 and all those sessions that ended in bloody fingers suddenly seem worthwhile. And you're happy that your guitar playing level has reached a new plateau.

It's been nice commiserating with you. Sadly, I have to earn a living, so I have to leave for now. Hope to see you back here soon and I'd love to hear about the progress you are certain to have made the next time we speak.

BTW, do you all still call an interstate on ramp, "Port of Entry" or something like that? Just curious.

Regards, Neil


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Subject: RE: MudCat Tavern - Round 12
From: katlaughing
Date: 27 Sep 99 - 09:49 AM

yea....and ya gotta have a visa to get in the state, through the Port of Entry!


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