Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)

Subject: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 10 Oct 11 - 09:25 AM

Re: Fascinating Aida. I've got the words to two of their popular songs: Dogging and Cheap Flights but have come up dry on the words to Tesco Saves ("Jesus saves but Tesco saves you more"). It is more suitable for a family audience than the other two. Has anyone got it? Videos are on Youtube but there are a lot of quick words in there.

RtS

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 12 Oct 11 - 05:51 AM

refresh

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 12 Oct 11 - 02:15 PM

Tesco may save but Fascinating Asda will match it.

I'll get my coat (From Sainsburys)

:D tG

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 12 Oct 11 - 06:23 PM

Tesco may save, but Sir Patrick Spens...

Kitty (also searching for coat)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 13 Oct 11 - 07:09 AM

Apparently the lyrics are printed in the CD liner notes. But I did find this on some random blog


Recently, it's come to my attention
Gordon Brown has buggered up my pension
This is very hard for us to weather;
Why the *!%@ d'ya think we're back together?

Other standout lyrics:

"Tesco Saves! Tesco Saves!
Oh, Jesus saves, but Tesco saves you more!
The good Lord may deliver you,
But Tesco can deliver too..."

"I watched two people fall in love
And one of them was you"

"Increasing immigration worries and bewilders;
On the other hand it leads to Polish builders;
They look rather sexy when they're working in their jerkins;
And it's very pleasant when they offer us their gerkins"

"(Heather Mills) Vengeful monoped
She is hopping mad
Hoppity hoppity hop"

"...although her cheeks were parted,
She spoilt it when she farted...
Bri and I were thrilled to bits;
I love to feel a copper's truncheon in between me tits"

Subject: Lyr Add: TESCO SAVES (Fascinating Aida)
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 24 Oct 11 - 06:09 PM

I found the album on Spotify and transcribed this. There are a few gaps where I couldn't understand. You can hear a somewhat abbreviated version performed by some amateurs at YouTube.


TESCO SAVES
As sung by Fascinating Aida on their album "Silver Jubilee" (2010)

Oh, there's a five letter word that brings salvation. (Yeah, salvation!)
Yes, there's a five-letter word to bring you peace of mind.
So let the whole congregation
Raise their hearts in exultation.
For now we see where once we all were blind. (We were blind!)
Five little letters bringin' hope to all mankind.
Let me hear you say T! (T!)
Let me hear you say E! (E!)
Let me hear you say S! (S!) C! (C!) O! (O!)
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Jesus saves but Tesco saves you more! (Saves you more!)
The special...
'Cause man can't live by bread alone,
Even though they bake it all in store. (Bake in store!)
You'll smell it as you glide in through the automatic door.
Come on in! Come on in!
Why wait until you die to go to heaven (heaven knows)
When paradise awaits you in those well-stocked aisles?
From Australian cream from Devon
... displayed in ... eleven.
Their pharmacist will help you with your piles.
They sell unattractive clothing in a range of ugly styles.
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Jesus saves but Tesco saves you more! (Saves you more!)
The good Lord may deliver you,
But Tesco can deliver too.
... is all you've ever dreamed.
You'll truly know redemption when your vouchers are redeemed.
Within these walls you'll see such revelations.
You will find the Tesco sign is just a Holy Grail,
And in the coming by-and-by,
From their web site in the sky,
You'll marvel at their range of goods on sale.
So sinners, come and join the pilgrims on the Tesco trail.
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Jesus saves but Tesco saves you more (more, more),
The Mount of Olives, the Fatted Calf,
Some DVDs to make you laugh,
And don't ignore their range of gourmet dishes. (Gourmet!)
You'll find them in the bakery between the loaves and fishes.
Hallelu! Hallelujah! Go down, Moses!
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Jesus saves but Tesco saves you more! (Saves you more!)
There's plenty of endangered cod,
Luscious racks of Lamb of God.
Don't forget insurance for your budgie.
Then go and grab yourself a bumper pack of something fudgy.

[SPOKEN] I feel the spirit, sister!
Yes the sprit of ...
I feel the spirit too, sister!
Will you take over from me at the cee-lestial organ?
(I will, sister!)
Brethren, let us embrace the Tesco way of life,
For they can supply gas, electricity, mobile phone, legal advice, internet and banking.
Thou shalt brave the world omnipotent,
And wish them success with their brand new store in Nanking.
Thou shalt be inexorably drawn towards the expensive items
By the teams of retail psychologists
Who are paid shitloads to manipulate your psyche.
Thou shalt not worship at the shrines of Aldi and Lidl,
For yea, verily, they are false gods. (False gods, false gods!)
What are they, my sisters? (False gods!)
What are they, my brothers and sisters? (False gods!)
Say it loud! (False gods!)
Say it louder! (False gods!)
And anyways, their carrying bags are ...
Thou shalt purchase strawberries in winter,
Nuked tomatoes all the way from Californ-eye-ay.
And apples—apples, apples, apples—that have spent a year in refrigeration.
Yea, thou shalt also purchase bags of chlorine-washed salad leaves,
Especially prepared for you
In countries where people are dying of starvation.
Thou shalt shun the independent record store
And use the Tesco web site to stream your favorite songs.
Thou shalt pop in for a pint o' milk
And somehow end up spending forty-seven pounds.
I have been moved. I have been moved.
Now you move!

[SINGING] Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Tesco saves! (Tesco saves!)
Jesus saves but Tesco saves you more! (More and more each day!)
Their stores are found both near and far,
Lots of space to park your car.
Prime locations! Sites, they sure can pick 'em. (They pick 'em.)
And sometimes they collapse on railway tracks like in High Wycombe.
Tesco saves ...
Tesco saves you more ...
So all you chil'en, fight the fight.
Ye unbelievers, see the light.
It's time to lift thine eyes unto the stars (unto the stars)
'Cause next month Tesco opens up its flagship store on Mars.
...
Tesco saves you more
Yeah, Lord!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 24 Oct 11 - 06:47 PM

The first two missing are:

  The special offer on Toblerones

  Are displayed in aisle eleven


Mick

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 24 Oct 11 - 06:50 PM

Sorry - that should be Toblerone (singular).

Mick

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 24 Oct 11 - 07:13 PM

And I think the 3rd might be:

  That club-card offers all you've ever dreamed

(These are from the youtube version. I looked at that when the request was first made, but didn't have time to go through it).

Mick

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 25 Oct 11 - 06:16 AM

Thanks, guys!

RtS

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: GUEST,David
Date: 04 Jan 19 - 06:08 PM

This ought to do it, except for the lines about Australian Cream?

https://lyricstranslate.com/en/fascinating-aida-tesco-saves-lyrics.html

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Tesco Saves (Fascinating Aida)
From: Gallus Moll
Date: 05 Jan 19 - 10:15 PM

Love Fascinating Aida!
Specially We're So Sorry Scotland!