BS: Things you should never do

Subject: BS: Things you should never do
From: Bert
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 06:19 PM

Introduce your kids to the delights of Turkish Coffee.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 06:24 PM

Tear your distal bicep tendon loose from its mooring at the elbow.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 06:29 PM

Offer to sell a seat in the US Senate to the highest bidder.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Melissa
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 06:32 PM

start a chainsaw braless.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 06:41 PM

fry bacon while nude

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Paul Burke
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:10 PM

Pick your nose while driving over speed bumps?

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:22 PM

Don't roller skate in a buffalo herd.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: gnu
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:30 PM

Tell a woman it's up to her as to whatever and you'll go along with whatever she decides. Just go ahead and make the decision like she said you should so you can be wrong and she can get pissed off at you no matter what you decide. Just get it over with on accounta she's gonna get pissed off no matter what decision you make.

Now, that might piss off some of the females herin, but I'd bet dollars to donuts the lads herein have been there and suffered that.

And I'll bet none of them will back me up... ya buncha pussies (Smart pussies?).

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:38 PM

Post like gnu just did.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:40 PM

Slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:41 PM

LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:43 PM

Scratch your wossname while breaking chilis to make a curry

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: gnu
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 07:45 PM

I agree, JtS.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 10:03 PM

Sneak up behind a large male chimp, sieze his balls in a grip of iron, and yell "Gotcha!"

Certain death. It works pretty much the same with grizzly bears, lions, etc.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,Dani
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 10:13 PM

Read this thread with a mouthful of wine...

Dani

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Rapparee
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 10:19 PM

Look down the barrel and say, "I wonder why it didn't go off?"

Try to cross the raging torrent on an old, wet, skinny log.

Say to yourself (and others), "Look, the ice is a quarter inch thick! It'll hold! I'll show you!"

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Bert
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 10:57 PM

How right you are gnu!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Don Firth
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 12:00 AM

Walk under a ladder when a painter is falling.

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 12:07 AM

Start a Mudcat thread and imagine that it won't turn inexplicably abusive at some unpredictable point!

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 05:01 AM

Scratch your wossname while breaking chilis to make a curry

Note to self, don't eat at Richard Bridge's after next Lower Stoke Winter Sing. Or the next. Or the next.

Gnu - that woman you described? I was married to a man like that. Always forced me to make decisions on "whatever" then argue me into tears about why I made said decision.

Ex husband: "Where do you want to go for your birthday dinner?"

Me: "Oh I don't mind."

Ex: "Come on! It is your birthday after all."

Me: "OK. How about that little Italian restaurant near Barrack Road Shopping Center."

Ex: "Why? What's wrong with Ponderosa?"

Me: "Well for one thing, the last time we were there, someone was standing on the counter right next to prepared food removing a dirty greasy vent from the over head air handling unit. And for another, it is my birthday and I would like to go to a nice family run intimate little restaurant."

Ex: "Oh it wasn't that bad. Ponderosa has a buffet and I have coupons."

Me: "I'd rather not go out, thanks. I'll go buy some steaks and well have a nice meal at home."

Ex: "Why are you being like this? Let's go to Ponderosa. They do steaks."

Me: approaching tears... "Fine, I guess I can find something on the salad bar." and under breath "happy fucking birthday to me."

Ex: shouting now... "What the fuck is your problem. Are you crying?"

Me: shouting back... "{{{YOU}}} asked me where {{{I}}} wanted to go. Leave me alone."

Ex: following me into bathroom... "This is emotional blackmail. What is wrong with Ponderosa?"

Me: sobbing now.. "Do you even bother listening to me? I answered that question already. You just aren't happy with it."   

This kind of scenario was acted out at least 3 times a week for 25 years of my life. He did it to our kids as well. He is this way with everyone. I am still surprised someone hasn't killed him. I am surprised I didn't kill him.

Things you should never do?

Never engage in any discussion with my ex husband. Not if you value your sanity.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 06:01 AM

Geeziz VT......May I congratulate you on getting at least the majority of your screws tightened back up?   Did you wind up killing the asshole?

Anyway.........things you should never do:

1-Tug on Superman's cape
2-Spit in the wind
3-Tear the mask off the old Lone Ranger
4-Mess around with Jim



Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:03 AM

It wasn't me! It was a friend from university after we both left and he was lecturing at Keele. He has already washed his hands - but in water which is not a solvent for the "hot" component of chili. I'm sure he washed his hands again after - but not for a while as he was too busy going "ow".

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Amergin
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:06 AM

sing Kevin Bloody Wilson songs at feminist conventions....

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:32 AM

Attach a rotary saw blade to a drill to cut wood.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: frogprince
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:51 AM

Puke into a gale if you're seasick.

Slice an inch or so off the width of a foot of board on the table saw without using a "push stick" carefully. (Oh well, it only took a couple of stitches.)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:52 AM

Eat yellow snow.

Dave H

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:55 AM

Light up a match so you can see if there's still enough battery fluid left inside that balky car battery...

(I saw someone do that, and the results were quite dramatic.)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 10:04 AM

Try to pick up a cat while you are using a blow dryer.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 10:11 AM

Drive across town with a nervous Siamese cat cradled gently in the passenger's arms to keep it from getting scared....

(DON'T do this on the freeway!)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 10:20 AM

Just talking to Raptor on the phone here, and he suggested...

"Don't wear a KKK outfit to an NBA game..."

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MarkS
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 10:20 AM

Throw s**t at an armed man.
Stand next to somebody who is throwing s**t at an armed man.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 10:31 AM

That's something every chimpanzee should know, and know well.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:44 AM

Pick your nose after you handled Naga Jolokia hot peppers, or rubbed A535 ointment on your joints.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Bill D
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:47 AM

Suggest that a redneck 'eschew obfuscation'.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:50 AM

Try to set off smartly on your Honda 500 without taking the disk lock off.

It only pulled some muscles in the end but it felt worse!

DtG

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:55 AM

let him sort the records after you broke up with him ...

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MAG
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:58 AM

(that was me; cookie out)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 12:01 PM

Run out of Dulce de Leche
Stop paying for private medical insurance

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 12:14 PM

Argue with an echo.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 01:01 PM

Step out of a limousine in front of several paparazzi when you are wearing a short skirt and no underwear.

(I heard that this happened somewhere. :)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 01:46 PM

""Pick your nose after you handled Naga Jolokia hot peppers, or rubbed A535 ointment on your joints""-or, if your a guy go to pee before washing the hot stuff of'n your hands..

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Dorothy Parshall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 02:23 PM

VT's response actually cheered me up! My ex was at least as bad. Wonderful that they are ex's.

Do not "should" on yourself. As in "I should try to be nice to...."(the ignorant SOB.) or I should phone ... " when that is the last thing in the world I want to so or need to do or...

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Don Firth
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 02:26 PM

Class break and we're all sitting around shooting the breeze. This guy says that he had a hemorrhoid operation just recently, and the doctor gave him a tube of soothing ointment to use after "doing his business." So one night he wakes from a sound sleep and has to go to the bathroom. He tidies up, and in his groggy state, reaches around on the back to the toilet for the tube of ointment.

He gets the Ben Gay by mistake.

He said that suddenly he was wide awake!!

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: bobad
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 02:30 PM

Accept one person's account of another person before hearing the other's version.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: bobad
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 02:30 PM

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Dorothy Parshall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 02:35 PM

Bobad gets the ten gold stars!!

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 02:52 PM

Never say "Yes" if your wife asks if her skirt or jeans make her ass look big.

My ex once asked if her new blue skirt made her look like a Mack truck, and I said, "No, dear; Mack trucks are always red."

True story.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 04:40 PM

Kendall... my answer was, "Actually, yes. Try that sexy black skirt you wore to your sister's wedding."

You fill in the rest of the story. Same result. >;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 04:46 PM

Use a poison ivy leaf as toilet paper, when short taken on a nature hike.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 04:47 PM

Tell the truth when your wife asks "how does this look" when trying on her favourite dress.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,donuel
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 04:59 PM

For a better view, never stand atop the mound of ice covering the handrails coated in smooth freezing mist atop Niagra Falls in January.

If you still insist upon standing atop the mound, never wear gloves since a good set of fingernails will act like icepicks to arrest your progress on the way down. Lastly, while clinging to the ice with the precipice of the falls yards away and your legs dragging in icewater, never be without friends above.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MAG
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 05:48 PM

I had one now-ex who tried to tell me how to dress and could be really nasty if I ignored his advice.

so I could say:

never take your guy's advice on how something looks. If he has an opinion, he's a control freak.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:17 PM

Walk down stairs wearing spurs
- Phil

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:38 PM

Or, squat.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:44 PM

Sometimes ya gotta squat... spurs or not.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Joe_F
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 08:32 PM

Pull out a plug by the cord.
Smoke in bed.
Leave here or there without pissing.
Stow the door key under the mat.
Dry a potholder in a microwave oven.
Use rotating machinery with long hair unsecured.
Stand in front of a goat, behind a mule, or anywhere around a fool.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 08:57 PM

Joe F..."Stand in front of a goat, behind a mule, or anywhere around a fool."

Finally! Some SOUND advice!

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:02 PM

Hand feed a Raccoon.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:30 PM

Hand feed a raccoon to a puma.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:41 PM

Hand feed a raccoon to a puma during half time.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:43 PM

If youa are an Austrailian, releal your true identity to a sheep.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 09:46 PM

Play leap frog with a Unicorn.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Clontarf83
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:16 PM

Things I have done or seen attempted:

Piss over the edge of the Cliffs of Moher (Ireland) in a high wind

Drink a litre and a half of Sangria in the afternoon in Torremolinos and then try to walk back to the hotel

Tune up by ear in a crowded room

Attend an Irish Christian Brothers School

Hold an objective discussion with your wife regarding her new hairdo

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 06:38 AM

Take a laxative and a sleeping pill at the same time.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Midchuck
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 07:04 AM

Take a laxative and a sleeping pill at the same time.

That's your wife's problem.

P.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 10:53 AM

Try to prove your sincerity by offering to make a $10,000 bet.

Refuse to turn off your cell phone when the flight attendant tells you it's time for takeoff.

(Hey, you'll never run out of these if you pay attention to current events!)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 11:27 AM

Gingrich has done more "never dos" then the rest of the GOP combined. Now he is leading.

Never underestimate the stupidity of the GOP base.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 12:05 PM

That's for damn sure.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 03:24 PM

They are not so much stupid as desperate.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 03:25 PM

Never argue with someone whose opinion you don't respect.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: kendall
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 04:22 PM

Never give advice. The wise don't need it and the stupid won't heed it.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 05:57 PM

Take a laxative and a sleeping pill at the same time as a long haul air trip.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 11 Dec 11 - 08:59 PM

Never make loud noises, act rude or silly, whip out your whanger or smoke in front of a Father Christmas! And most of all, NEVER get drunk and disorderly in the presence of a Father Christmas! There can only be one result to such foolish behaviour, it will be final, and it won't be nice.

Don't Do THIS!

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,Whistle Stop
Date: 12 Dec 11 - 08:43 AM

Be cruel to a heart that's true.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,Patsy
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 07:41 AM

Take a laxative the night before an important appointment or special occasion because if it seems it hasn't worked it is sure to at an inopportune moment later. Believe me.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 12:41 PM

(NEVER) Make fun of a vicious dog just because he is behind a wall or on a chain and appears to be unable to reach you at the moment.

They have very long memories. They do not forgive (unless you're part of their "family").

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 01:32 PM

But in Spain, it is OK to taunt a vicious dog. As long as your taunts are in English.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 02:10 PM

Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow. ~Aesop

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 02:24 PM

Have white wine with red meat.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 02:53 PM

Have red wine in beer mugs with red meat.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: The Sandman
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 05:38 PM

chongo a chimp,never do it

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,Pepe Gonzales
Date: 13 Dec 11 - 06:07 PM

No tienes razon, Jack.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,LongOlWoody
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 10:35 AM

Confuse your haemorrhoid ointment with the super glue

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,LongOlWoody
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 10:37 AM

Tell her its not the jeans that make her look fat.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Musket
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 11:16 AM

When your in laws buy you both a coffee percolator, don't thank them for such a perky copulator.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 01:18 PM

Confuse your dental cream with haemorrhoid ointment or super glue

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 01:22 PM

Relieve yourself of gas on an elevator, even if you are alone, and even if there is a possibility that it won't have bilge water aroma.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 01:23 PM

Confuse topical iodine with vegetable iodine.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 01:25 PM

Point and laugh at passers by genitalia, unless you are a chimp.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 01:27 PM

Assume that topical iodine is broadly topical.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: frogprince
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 01:46 PM

Is vegetable iodine for treating injured vegetables?

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Ed T
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 05:12 PM

""Is vegetable iodine for treating injured vegetables? ""

Veggies with a thyroid issue.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 05:13 PM

It's a darned good thing to take daily following nuclear plant meltdowns, whether in near or distant locations.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 15 Dec 11 - 05:31 PM

GOP agenda

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 12:27 AM

In Spain: use a knife as an aid to eating an egg, however cooked.

I understand that this is regarded as a terrible solecism and breach of etiquette, but cannot help wondering why.


Anyone know?

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 12:40 AM

A remnant of the dark ages? When the knife was needed to fend off starving wastrels and other egg stealing scum?

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 01:37 AM

That's one of the oddest things I've ever heard, MthGM.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 02:46 AM

Yes, it is odd, isn't it! But seems to be true. I first found it mentioned in Julian Fellowes' novel Snobs, and, checking up on google, found the following on a website:~

~~~
Table manners in Spain, Written by Ben Curtis

March 29th, 2007 at 6:57 pm

Posted in Defining the Spanish,Spanish Culture and News
~~

is it true that in Spain you should not eat eggs with a knife? is this rule universal or only for Spain? Sean
   
Yes, fried eggs should not be eaten with the help of a knife. They should always be cut with your fork or, if in trouble because they have "puntilla" (the crusty border), use a piece of bread to help the fork. Lluci

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: JennieG
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 02:55 AM

Never ever use your wife's hairspray in mistake for underarm deodorant.

Particularly when said wife wonders where her (seldom used, I must admit) hairspray has gone.......

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,Patsy
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 05:14 AM

Never take your temper out on anything technical i.e. the tv, mobile phone, printers, computers or suchlike. You may be tempted to give it a kick or chuck it out of the window but the effect will be costly.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 05:18 AM

Put '100'on any thread.

So ~~~ 101!

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 08:50 AM

Why would you want to eat an egg with a knife?

Maybe the prohibition is really against doing silly inappropriate things with utensils, like eating soup with a fork.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: GUEST,Black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 09:23 AM

Would that be the "Soup in a basket"?

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 11:26 AM

Jim Dixon ~ Nonsense. How can you eat a chicken on a raft {Royal Navy name for fried egg on a slice of toast or fried bread] without a knife — or scrambled or poached egg on toast, for that matter? These are the classic, most delicious, of breakfast egg dishes - along with soft-boiled egg, for which one will need a knife to cut the toast into the correct dipping 'soldiers'. The Spaniards, poor dears, seem wilfully to be depriving themselves of these incomparable delicacies!

Not olé····

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 11:39 AM

I love all those quaint descriptive terms the British use for food...

"chicken on a raft"
"pig in a blanket"
"bubble and squeak"
"spotted dick"
"bangers and mash"

Delightful expressions!

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 12:36 PM

When you asked about using a knife on an egg, I wasn't visualizing an egg on toast. That's not how eggs are generally served in the US. We eat our toast separately. When you're eating in a cafe, the toast usually arrives already cut in half diagonally, and there is no need to cut it further.

Maybe a more important question is: Why would you embarrass a guest by correcting their table manners? (Unless you were serving some unfamiliar food that they didn't know how to handle. I could have used some expert advice the one time I was served a lobster in Maine.)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Little Hawk
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 12:44 PM

Lobsters are best taken on with a vise, a hammer, and a small chain saw... ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: gnu
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 02:56 PM

Nah... a carving knife, properly used, and lobster "forks" (single tine) or just an ordinary fork wielded with adeptness. I hate it when a lobster is served spliced longitudinally. That's fer them fancy restaurants where them there patrons dunno how to crack a crawler.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 03:18 PM

---Maybe a more important question is: Why would you embarrass a guest by correcting their table manners?---

.,,.,.

Who has done that, Jim? I don't quite follow the point you are making in this post.

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Donuel
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 03:26 PM

Never tell a Bill Mahre joke at a republican ultra christian xmas party.

I did.

for almost 2 years I got over 450 hang up calls between 2 and 4AM after I told that Bill Mahre joke .

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 03:40 PM

Donuel: I assume you mean Bill Maher. Do you remember the joke?

M: I inferred that it had happened to you or to someone you know—otherwise, how did you learn that using a knife on an egg was "a terrible solecism and breach of etiquette"?

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 03:45 PM

Jim ~~I specified the nswer to this precisely in my post of 0246 a.m.

Subject: RE: BS: Things you should never do
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 16 Dec 11 - 04:23 PM

M: sorry, I missed that.

Is this rule universal or only for Spain?...
   
Yes...

That's not a very helpful way to answer a question, is it?