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Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort

frogprince 21 Nov 17 - 12:04 PM
ranger1 21 Nov 17 - 10:18 AM
Nigel Paterson 21 Nov 17 - 06:07 AM
Ebbie 21 Nov 17 - 03:22 AM
ChanteyLass 20 Nov 17 - 08:40 PM
frogprince 20 Nov 17 - 07:31 PM
bobad 20 Nov 17 - 07:11 PM
gnu 20 Nov 17 - 06:27 PM
keberoxu 20 Nov 17 - 06:00 PM
maeve 20 Nov 17 - 05:41 PM
frogprince 20 Nov 17 - 05:12 PM
Pete from seven stars link 19 Nov 17 - 04:28 PM
Nigel Paterson 19 Nov 17 - 07:40 AM
ranger1 18 Nov 17 - 11:01 PM
ChanteyLass 18 Nov 17 - 07:15 PM
Janie 18 Nov 17 - 02:54 PM
frogprince 18 Nov 17 - 02:34 PM
ChanteyLass 16 Nov 17 - 10:30 PM
gnu 13 Nov 17 - 06:28 PM
Sandra in Sydney 13 Nov 17 - 12:46 AM
ChanteyLass 12 Nov 17 - 09:35 PM
keberoxu 12 Nov 17 - 07:17 PM
Sandra in Sydney 10 Nov 17 - 09:55 AM
Acme 08 Nov 17 - 09:38 PM
ChanteyLass 08 Nov 17 - 09:23 PM
Pete from seven stars link 08 Nov 17 - 12:03 PM
keberoxu 07 Nov 17 - 02:38 PM
keberoxu 05 Nov 17 - 07:14 PM
ChanteyLass 03 Nov 17 - 07:31 PM
ChanteyLass 03 Nov 17 - 07:00 PM
ranger1 03 Nov 17 - 11:03 AM
frogprince 03 Nov 17 - 12:33 AM
ChanteyLass 02 Nov 17 - 05:43 PM
ranger1 02 Nov 17 - 12:11 PM
Sandra in Sydney 02 Nov 17 - 08:18 AM
ranger1 02 Nov 17 - 08:09 AM
ranger1 01 Nov 17 - 10:38 PM
ChanteyLass 01 Nov 17 - 10:06 PM
ranger1 01 Nov 17 - 07:42 PM
Rapparee 26 Oct 17 - 09:23 PM
keberoxu 25 Oct 17 - 02:44 PM
Pete from seven stars link 23 Oct 17 - 06:27 PM
Janie 22 Oct 17 - 11:18 AM
ranger1 22 Oct 17 - 12:36 AM
keberoxu 21 Oct 17 - 11:07 PM
ChanteyLass 21 Oct 17 - 08:35 PM
keberoxu 21 Oct 17 - 06:16 PM
ChanteyLass 19 Oct 17 - 08:38 PM
Rapparee 19 Oct 17 - 08:25 PM
gnu 18 Oct 17 - 07:28 PM
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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 21 Nov 17 - 12:04 PM

Nigel: Oh yes...oh yes.
Thanks, all of ya.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 21 Nov 17 - 10:18 AM

Meeting you and Judy was a joy. I sorrow in your physical loss, but I am glad she is free from the pain of losing herself.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 21 Nov 17 - 06:07 AM

Dear Dean, these uncredited words will have to speak for me:

"When we take our vows and say, "until death us do part," we are fooling ourselves. Death only brings a physical departure. A marriage and the bond between a husband and wife make two people into one. That means that even when we lose our wife, we are still left with that special love that burns inside and never dies. That internal love burns on even when our wife is no longer with us. Clinging to that love inside us, even though it can never be physically expressed again, can carry and sustain us in her passing". (edited)

                                                                Much love to You, your Family & Friends,
                                                                                                                                  Nigel.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Ebbie
Date: 21 Nov 17 - 03:22 AM

"As it turned out, I had years more of loving her, and of being loved by her."
That was my first thought, Dean. For that, both of you can be congratulated. The love you shared is a special thing, something that many,many people never have.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 08:40 PM

You were blessed to have Judy in your life, and she was blessed to have you in hers. I hope memories of your good times together will comfort you.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 07:31 PM

I can, and will, carry on. I had something of a rehearsal, five years ago, for losing Judy. As it turned out, I had years more of loving her, and of being loved by her. There are good hearts in the world; Judy's was one of them.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: bobad
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 07:11 PM

Condolences on your loss Dean.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 06:27 PM

froggy... I have no words. None that could convey my feelings. I read of your relationship with her in the past in your posts many times. I hope you can carry on, dear friend.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 06:00 PM

Just this moment read your post, frogprince.

All day I have been wondering
why I feel as though
I am being crushed absolutely flat as an envelope.
Now that I have your news,
I believe I know why.

Keep breathing, good and trusted friend, even if you feel squashed flat.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: maeve
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 05:41 PM

Dean, my heart is full of sorrow for you, and overflowing with gratitude that your dear Judy, loved deeply and faithfully, has been released from that confusion, pain and suffering.

Thank you for your courage in caring for her as she needed to be cared for. Thank you for opening this window into your life. I salute you both.

Gardenmaeve


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 20 Nov 17 - 05:12 PM

About nine this morning, as I was about to start down to the care home to spend time with Judy, my phone rang. She is gone. I went down to see her. It was plain that she had slept peacefully, and slipped away. Cremation is arranged, I've chosen a simple urn. The pain is what it is, but no more miserable confusion and frustration for her.

             Dean


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 19 Nov 17 - 04:28 PM

Sorry to hear this Dean. So hard. She does have the love of a good man , but it's tough bless you


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 19 Nov 17 - 07:40 AM

Dean, I really don't know what to say...your situation & the burden you have to bear is at the outer reaches of life's vicissitudes. That you have my love & long distance support goes without question. Finding the strength & courage to post says much about you, Dean.
                Holding you & Judy close in my thoughts,
                                                                                    Nigel.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 18 Nov 17 - 11:01 PM

Hugs, to both you and Judy.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 18 Nov 17 - 07:15 PM

Dean, you've made a wise but difficult decision. I'm sending love to you and your wife, and if I could find heart-mending glue, I would send it, too.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Janie
Date: 18 Nov 17 - 02:54 PM

Ahhh....Dean. Was just about to post myself that I am not afraid of experiencing my heart breaking, but need folks around who understand and will keep me safe without trying to keep it from happening.

Breathing with you.

Love, Janie


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 18 Nov 17 - 02:34 PM

I'll put this here, and on another thread; it's taken me a few days to do it. For any here who wouldn't know, my wife suffered total heart blockage in June 2012. It was twenty minutes between total arrest and resucitation. She recovered with no real physical disability at all. She has been able to do her own personal care, other than keeping track of pills and insulin. It's been up to me to cook and keep track of any schedules, but, no big deal; we've traveled to interesting places and life has been good.

Life-long diabetics are very subject to dementia, and to early onset. Judy's neurologist confirmed probable alzheimer's a year or so ago. Her ability to do things for herself began slipping away. We arranged a care-giver for three days of the week, and with that respite, we've been doing okay. A couple of weeks ago, her condition dropped off abruptly, to where she would not allow me to give her necessary care safely at home. Our care-giver came in daily while I arranged placement in a nearby facility; even so, I had take her for emergency hospitalization for a couple of days before we got her situated.

In the hospital she was restless, but cooperative with nurses and doctors. We took her to the care home Friday morning, a week ago. Thursday they asked me to come in for a meeting. She has been refusing to take her meds, or get up for meals. We arranged hospice status. By their definitions for hospice, they will continue the same care she would have received, so far as remains possible without force or restraint. They will not send her for hospitalization. We had completed a DNR a couple of years ago.

I think she is in the hands of good people, who will do the best that can be done. But my heart is in pieces.
                            Dean.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 16 Nov 17 - 10:30 PM

Refresh!


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 13 Nov 17 - 06:28 PM

Haven't read many posts for a long time. Dealing with 'stuff'. My heart goes out with joy to some and sorrow with others. I now fill my days with trivial pursuits on Facebook between chores. Keeps my mind off of 'stuff'. Bless you all.

6000+ posts! Like Acme said... "Good thread, Janie."

Peace. Out.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 13 Nov 17 - 12:46 AM

some people leave a great hole when they die.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 12 Nov 17 - 09:35 PM

My daughter-in-law's stepfather, whom I wrote about on Nov. 3, came home for a few days and died last Sunday. The memorial service was today. Since my son married my daughter-in-law 8 years ago, I have spent most major holidays with her mother, stepfather, and the rest of her family, and I was invited to enter the church and sit with the family for the mamorial service. After that, there was a collation in the church hall, and then the family invited me to join them for dinner at a nearby restaurant. The family, including his wife, is bearing up well. I will miss this kind, caring man; his family and friends will miss him more.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 12 Nov 17 - 07:17 PM

Nigel, hope you are in less pain these days.

Janie, you asked for us to support you while you supported those who most needed you.
Still keeping you in my heart.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 10 Nov 17 - 09:55 AM

well done kids! & well done parents who raised them.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Acme
Date: 08 Nov 17 - 09:38 PM

For the good news portion of this thread - today was my daughter's first day as a full-time librarian in a job with benefits. She was in a local museum librarian fellowship (2 years) and they liked her, so after 8 months in that job they let her know a librarian position was open. She applied, and it was hers within hours.

My heart if full and my job is done - both kids are employed with benefits and are debt free because their father helped them with the costs at the university. They did the work, but met our mutual goal.

6000. Good thread, Janie.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 08 Nov 17 - 09:23 PM

It sounds like a lovely and meaningful service, Pete, well worth adding to your memories of Tommy.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 08 Nov 17 - 12:03 PM

Thanks keberoxu. Though obviously sad , the service lived up to being a celebration of tommys life . It was conducted by a man who's been at the church longer than we have ( from our youth ) , so knew tommy and us . He made it very personal , with stories of tommy doing things like going over to the flowers to touch and smell . Becky bravely delivered a lovely tribute, on auto pilot , she said , but which failed her at the committal .tributes also from his head teacher , and a nurse involved for most of his life . The worship section included songs he seemed to most enjoy at church and school .his favourite song we are sure was my song ' monkey biz' was played with photos projected on the screen . The church was packed , and the ladies provided abundant refreshments. Though it was a hard day , and we have an aching hole in our lives , it was comforting that so many people turned out for him, and us . Thanks again for your all your thought and prayers for us          Blessings    Pete


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 07 Nov 17 - 02:38 PM

Check in with everybody when you're good and ready,
Pete from seven stars,
and not one instant before.
This cannot have been easy or painless for you and your family.

The rest of us hold you as we are able,
with wordless empathy,
with respect and admiration.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 05 Nov 17 - 07:14 PM

Thinking of Pete and his family
as they get ready for what Pete called, above,
"thanksgiving for Tommy's life."


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 03 Nov 17 - 07:31 PM

On a more serious note:

A week ago a woman I've known and sung with (strictly for fun) that I met two years ago had survived Stage 2 breast cancer a few years before we met. At least that's what she thought. Last year she couldn't get out of bed one morning and was rushed to the hospital--actually three hospitals because the first two weren't equipped to treat her. The third hospital is affiliated with a prestigious university. The staff there diagnosed her with Stage 4 cancer. Wth treatment she has done surprisingly well but told me last week she has decided to halt treatment. I was startled because it seemed like she was having few side effects especially when compared to what she said she'd experienced with Stage 2.

My daughter-in-law's stepfather has also decided to come home from a hospital and get hospice care. I had no idea his situation was so serious. A few weeks ago I'd asked my daughter-in-law how her mother and stepfather were. She'd said that her mom was well but her stepfather was having some health problems that were slowing him down. She didn't elaborate, and I didn't pry. I knew her dad had become insulin-dependent and a little more than a year ago had had a serious back problem. Two weeks ago I sent him a birthday card and his wife emailed that he'd been in the hospital for five weeks and my card had brought a smile to his face. Again I didn't press for details. I thought the hospital staff was trying to balance his insulin, pain meds for his back, and other meds but couldn't get the balance right, that he was having side effects or something. Then last night his wife posted on Facebook that in spite of chemo (which I didn't know about) and dialysis (which I didn't know about) his condition was deteriorating more rapidly than expected. That's why he's decided to come home and get hospice care.

Of course I respect their decisions, but I was unprepared for this news from either of them, so I'm stunned.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 03 Nov 17 - 07:00 PM

Laughter is the best medicine--unless you laugh so hard it hurts.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 03 Nov 17 - 11:03 AM

Dean - cellar!


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 03 Nov 17 - 12:33 AM

Tami, are you sure you're not just pullin' our chain ?


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 02 Nov 17 - 05:43 PM

Yay, ranger1! Dance away!


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 02 Nov 17 - 12:11 PM

I dunno if I danced, but I did cackle gleefully as I flushed the toilet.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 02 Nov 17 - 08:18 AM

& happy dance?


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 02 Nov 17 - 08:09 AM

Water working this AM. Oh, happy day!


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 01 Nov 17 - 10:38 PM

And when I got home from Jason's, my landlady's house was lit up. Ah! Still no running water, hoping the pressure switch didn't get blown by the power surge and brown out around midnight on Sunday.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 01 Nov 17 - 10:06 PM

Ranger1, I used to live in a house that lost power and water for days at a time, and I didn't have a generator. I did have a fireplace and an outhouse, though. It was no fun, and at my age I'm glad I no longer live there. Stay warm, dry, and safe.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 01 Nov 17 - 07:42 PM

And now on day three of storm-caused power outage. My neighborhood isn't scheduled to be restored until Friday night. No lights, no heat, no water. One tree down blocking me into the driveway, it tore the phone lines off my landlady's house, but no other property damage. And we've got the generator hooked up and running the refrigerators for the two properties, so all our food won't spoil. Could be a lot worse. I have drinking water, it's not too cold outside, and the biggest inconvenience is having to hike through the woods to the pond with a couple of gallon jugs to haul water to flush the toilet.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Oct 17 - 09:23 PM

It was a long process, but she's at peace now. Thanks for the thoughts


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 25 Oct 17 - 02:44 PM

Thinking of Rapparee / Rapaire and his whole family
as the first-year anniversary approaches
of the difficult passing-away of one of his siblings.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete from seven stars link
Date: 23 Oct 17 - 06:27 PM

Yes , a fitting and evocative piece .                            We are in the aching void in between time now . Tommys thanksgiving for his life is not till 7 November . We have had lots of people visiting and we expect a lot to the service at our church. It will be hard , but we are comforted by there being so many who thought so much of him. Thanks for your support and expressions of love and sympathy too.                Blessings.    Pete


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Janie
Date: 22 Oct 17 - 11:18 AM

That is beautiful, Tami. Thank you.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ranger1
Date: 22 Oct 17 - 12:36 AM

Leaving this here, because it's a beautiful song and may offer some comfort. Come the Wind


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 21 Oct 17 - 11:07 PM

So do I !!


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 21 Oct 17 - 08:35 PM

Keberoxu, I hope you find comfort.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: keberoxu
Date: 21 Oct 17 - 06:16 PM

Some losses take a long, long time for the ache to ease.

Thinking of everyone who has reason to ache with loss today,
while aching with memories, myself,
of losses from a while ago.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 19 Oct 17 - 08:38 PM

I've been away and am trying to catch up. I'm glad to read some good news.
Wendy, I'm delighted to hear that Billy is doing so well.
Nigel, it's good to have you back aboard.
Janie, while you care for your friend, I hope you can care for yourself, too.
Pete, I'm distressed to read the sad news about Tommy. I wish I could think of something to ease your sorrow. You and Becky took such good care of him. He was blessed to receive so much love.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Oct 17 - 08:25 PM

I have no words to add to what has been said, Pete. Remember though that he is now at rest, all troubles over.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 18 Oct 17 - 07:28 PM

What Janie said. I still have no words of my own.


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