Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Janie
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 10:01 PM

Holding all of you to the Light.

Janie

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: gnu
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 05:49 PM

David Nutall.... I can barely see to type... thank you. I had never read that before. I have heard same expressed in many ways but never in such clarity.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: KT
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 05:40 PM

Right on, gnu. Like the line in Janie's post said, "Is it okay if I stay here with you and cry for awhile..." Sometimes that's all there is to do.
KT

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: frogprince
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 01:57 PM

I've been sitting, unable to post for a while, too full of the combination of sorrow and of appreciation for what I've seen in people here.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: maeve
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 11:10 AM

I've always liked that, David.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,David Nuttall, Wakefield
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 11:06 AM

Please forgive me if others have alluded to these LINES in previous postings. I was a late starter on this prolonged metaphorical , nautical journey...but I hope this provides some comfort or food for thought.


                  THE SAILING SHIP

What is death ?
I am standing on the sea shore ,
A ship sails in the morning breeze and starts for the ocean.
She is an object of beauty and I stand watching her .
Til at last she fades on the horizon and someone at my side says :
"She is gone ."

Gone ! Where ?
Gone from my sight - that is all .
She is just as large in the masts , hull and spars as she was when I saw her
And just as able to bear her load of living freight to its destination.
The diminished size and total loss of sight is in me , not in her .


And just at the moment when someone at my side says ,
"She is gone "
There are others who are watching her coming and other voices take up a glad shout :
" There she comes "
- and that is dying . An horizon and just the limit of our sight .
Lift us up , Oh Lord , that we may see further .

BISHOP CHARLAES HENRY BRENT ( 1862 - 1926 )

David

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: billybob
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 07:27 AM

Dear Nigel and Ann

Everything that has been said by others,

Jane has brought us all together to be here in times of trouble and sadness, but to be here to travel together on the Rainbow to hold you and Ann in our hearts as we go through these troubled waters together.

So much wisdom, so much love, such a wonderful crew of beautiful people.

sending you both a blanket of love

Wendy and Billy
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 07:10 AM

Gnu's right. Not a dry eye here yesterday. We've all shared this journey with you since 12 January last year and to me it seems like we've lost one of us.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: maeve
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 06:26 AM

Nigel- It is your and Ann's time, Jane's husband's and childrens' time- of grieving. Feel what you feel, express that which you can express, and remember that there are many friends thinking of you all.

My grandmother outlived six of her nine children. "It's not supposed to be like this!" she said. She found ways to remember them while continuing to find joy in her life. You can too.

Make some music. It doesn't have to be beautiful or complete or be shared with anyone else. Hug Ann as often as possible. Focus on your breathing, on the world's beauty, on those who love you. Appreciate the depth and range of your emotions. Speak your love.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: katlaughing
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 05:09 AM

exactly, gnu...Nigel, swhout it out, write it out, however it helps let the anger out along with the tears.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: gnu
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 04:57 AM

Ditto Jeri.

Nigel, no need to conceal your anger. As for the tears, I doubt if there are any dry eyes in the Café.

Here.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 04:33 AM

I was also re-reading & crying

sandra

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 25 Mar 13 - 04:20 AM

I'm reading...crying...re-reading...listening...trying to visualise all of you...crying some more. Can't write much yet...hurting too much...the loss of our belovéd Daughter, Jane has hit us hard...lost many relatives & friends over the years, but this is of a different order & the order is wrong...aren't children supposed to outlive their parents? Can't conceal the anger in my grief. In time, we will find ways of living with the pain, I know that to be true, but right now, feelings are raw.
                        Knowing & feeling your Love & Compassion,
                                                                                           Nigel & Ann
                                                                                           xxxxxxxxxx

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Jeri
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 09:20 PM

My condolences.
Of all you can give someone, or all you can do for them, just being there for them is perhaps the only thing that matters. Thanks for sharing this journey with us.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 08:55 PM

I am so sorry. Thank you for letting us share your journey this far. I will be on board wherever this ship sails next. There is a new star in the heavens to help guide the way.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 01:15 PM

My thoughts are with you and with the others of Jane's family.

Pete

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,pete from seven stars link
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 12:57 PM

also feel like there are no words at this time of deep loss - just that friends are still here,as has already been expressed.
God bless    pete.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 12:07 PM

I have no words to comfort you. This is a brutal loss. I keep you and yours in my prayers.
Mary

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 12:06 PM

i give thanks she had a peaceful passing. My sorrow for you knows no bounds as does my love. What an incredible family you have to have such a special soul as Jane's, bringing a world of strangers together, as Spaw said, to become friends whilst she traveled the ulimate Journey.

With love, condolences, and a promise to continue with the others and you,

Kathleen LaFrance

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Janie
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 11:51 AM

"Is There Something I Can Do" (Five Star Iris)

Whoever made the claim that words could ease the pain
Never watched your tears fill up an ocean
Never saw your face, the moment you found out
That you'd have to live without, until heaven

Is there somethin' I can do other than being here for you to ease the pain
If I can keep you from fallin', fallin' down'
I'm sorry to sound selfish but I feel so helpless
Is it okay if I stay here with you and cry for awhile

Whoever made the claim that words could ease the pain
Never watched you fall apart, never put you back together
When you were broken down, into a million pieces
Scattered on the ground

Is there somethin' I can do
What can I say, what can I do

Music and Lyrics by Alan Schaefer and Dexter Green

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: frogprince
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 11:46 AM

Would that we could be with you in the flesh, to embrace you; that we could really offer more than words to give you strength, until healing can begin. Know that yours are not the only tears.

                   Dean.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Ebbie
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 11:38 AM

Arms spread wide: {{{{em>hug}}}}

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Maryrrf
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 11:11 AM

Nigel and Ann, I am so sorry. Even when it is expected, the blow comes hard. Jane's suffering has ended, and a part of the journey is over. Now begins the long process of healing.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: KT
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 10:56 AM

I'm so very sorry, Nigel.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 10:50 AM

so many beautiful thoughts

so much love

rest in peace, Jane, find peace Nigel & Anne & family

sandra

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: maeve
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 09:30 AM

Here is some of the music mentioned early in the thread:

"You'll Never Walk Alone" G&PM

Close to you ( I Watch the Sunrise)- Maureen Hegarty by Father John Glynn

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Megan L
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 09:20 AM

I remember as a child being very upset by the death of a school friend, Mum told me something then that I have held onto for the rest of my life.

She told me that when we are born the candle of our light is lit. it is as thin as a wax taper yet as we grow with each good choice we make, each wise thought or word that crosses our lips the thin taper gets dipped once more. With each dip the candle glows brighter and the number of dips is not solely dependent on age but on the light within the person.

Many see the end of life as the candle snuffed out but she told me that every person who loved one who died, every person who can share a memory of their kindness or wisdom carries a small piece of their candle added to their own.

As long as one person can remember something the person said or did the light from their candle will continue to light our path and drive away darkness.

Now is the time to do what you have to do but dont forget to be kind to yourselves and remember while you grieve each one of us is here to carry her candle one more step.

Thinking of all the family
Meg

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,Frug
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 09:15 AM

Deepest sympathies.

Frank

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 09:03 AM

It always hurts......but Jane no longer hurts and her pain is gone. For her family and friends the pain is so much greater. But even this great pain will be reduced with time and the love that was Jane will endure on and bring happier memories of more joyful times.

We wish you that healing peace which love brings over time and we thank Jane for letting us share this terrible journey for she has brought together a caring group of friends that she never met and most of whom will never meet each other. That in itself is a wonderful albeit painful legacy but one for which we are thankful.

We are here Nigel and Ann and we will be here to go the rest of the distance wth you with love and hope. Much Love.


Spaw/Pat/Patrick/Guy in Ohio

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: maeve
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 08:58 AM

I'm also thinking of Spaw, away for treatment, who told us, ..."hold me a good thought and I will do the same for all of you."

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,David Nuttall , Wakefield
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 08:18 AM

FAREWELL

Farewell to Thee ! But not farewell
To all my fondest thoughts of Thee ;
Within my heart they still shall dwell
And they shall cheer and comfort me.

Life seems more sweet that Thou didst live
And men more true Thou wert one ;
Nothing is lost that Thou didst give ,
Nothing destroyed that Thou hast done .

ANNE BRONTE ( 1820 - 1849 )

David

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,999
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 07:40 AM

I'm sorry, buddy.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Janie
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 07:38 AM

I'm so sorry, Nigel & Ann. So inadequate...words...

For what comfort it may bring, still here.

Janie

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: jacqui.c
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 07:30 AM

No words - still here.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: fat B****rd
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 07:13 AM

Please allow me to add my best thoughts,condolences and kindest regards to those of all your other friends here.
Charles Stenger

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: rumanci
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 07:02 AM

My heart bleeds for you Nigel and Ann and the whole family.
Sincerest condolences and strength to sustain you now.
Rest in peace dear beloved Jane
Love, hugs, all ways
Always
rum

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 06:56 AM

Oh, dear Nigel and Ann, deepest love and sympathy flowing your way. Still here, still singing, still gathered and hovering.

The evening of the day my beloved Byron died, our friends gathered with me and sang the night away. I felt wrapped in their love and support, as I hope you do now, in this dark time. You are deeply loved, and love never dies.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,David Nuttall , Wakefield
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 06:28 AM

Dear Nigel and Ann ,   I am so very,very sorry to hear of your immense sad loss . Jane , you , Ann and your family are uppermost in my thoughts . I trust you may come to find rest , peace and comfort in the times to come.

The support and genuine affection you have received ( and your reciprocal sincerity and warmth to others here ) are all testimony to the high regard in which you are all held....and I know it will continue to be so .

With sincere condolences.

David

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: maeve
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 06:09 AM

Goodbye, Jane. Well done the life and the battle. You are loved.

Sail away lady, sail away.

Nigel and Ann- Your deep sorrow is reflected and felt by many friends.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: billybob
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 05:46 AM

My Dear Nigel and Ann

Cannot find the words to say what is in my heart,God bless you both and may Jane rest in everlasting peace, free from pain but held in your love for ever.

Sending you our love
Wendy and Billy xxxxxxxx

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,Suzi
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 04:58 AM

So very sorry Nigei, Ann and of course Janes loving family. may Jane rest in perfect peace. Xxx

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: gnu
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 04:46 AM

My sincerest condolences to all.

Rest in peace, Jane.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 04:24 AM

My Dearest Friends, our belovéd daughter, Jane, lost her battle with cancer last night (Saturday). She died peacefully & painlessly, surrounded by her Family.
       Come to us, be with us, for we are truly bereft.
                      With Love to You All,
                                                      Nigel & Ann.
                                                      xxxxxxxxxx

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 24 Mar 13 - 02:30 AM

Wonderful, Maeve.

I agree with others that it is good to know that Jane's pain is under control. It is also good to know that so many people are keeping vigil at Jane's bedside while we keep vigil from a distance.

And Nigel, we'll be here when you are ready. No pressure!

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 23 Mar 13 - 09:41 PM

still sending love to all

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: billybob
Date: 23 Mar 13 - 08:21 PM

Still here
xxx

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: gnu
Date: 23 Mar 13 - 07:33 PM

Ditto Janie.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: Janie
Date: 23 Mar 13 - 06:18 PM

Lovely, maeve.

still here.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: GUEST,pete from seven stars link
Date: 23 Mar 13 - 02:24 PM

beautifully expressed and constructed verse ,maeve.
in all the sorrow it is at least good to know the pain control is fully effective.God bless   pete.

Subject: RE: Healing thoughts & prayers please (Nigel Paterson)
From: frogprince
Date: 23 Mar 13 - 11:00 AM

And that, Maeve, is sublime, bless your heart.