BS: A Fantasy of mine.

Subject: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 01:34 AM

I am at a gas station, dude pulls up in an old car with rims, tires, and day glo paint job that cost more than the car. He is trying to prove that the stereo cost more than all of the above. He goes into the store leaving me and only me to listen to music I do not like. What is to stop me from walking up to the car, reaching into the open window and grabbing the keys and tossing them into the neighboring trees?

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 04:19 AM

It's theft (as a matter of UK law) - probably, although there is an issue about intent permanently to deprive.

I don't immediately see why you should not turn his amplifier off (so long as you plan to enjoy the fight when he emerges bent on killing you for the insult).

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 04:48 AM

I guess that's the problem with this 'right to bear arms' business. His machine gun probably cost as much as his stereo and his car.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Musket
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 04:49 AM

Hello Sailor!

Carry on listening, you may widen your musical horizon.

Now, if we could only work on your other horizons.......

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 04:59 AM

And who appointed Jack, I should like to know, as unquestioned universal arbiter of and censor to everyone's musical tastes and preferences?

A bit of tolerance, Jack? A bit of modesty? A bit of bugger·off·if·you··don't·like·it?

And is this the most appropriate forum on which to exercise one's sadistic fantasies? I know of some others much better adapted for such a purpose!

〠☺〠~M~〠☺〠

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Megan L
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 05:07 AM

it is no wonder he was upset the guy was listening to his girfriend playing this

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnomad
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 05:31 AM

I don't know the relative agility you v.numbnuts, but unless the balance is significantly in his favour, then the answer to your question is only yourself.

Of course that doesn't answer the significant question of what might be the consequences of such an act, such as that he hangs around for ages waiting for his pal with the equally appalling taste who has a tow truck (That sort-of assumes your fantasy includes your wishing to remain at the gas station. Takes all sorts.) Or that he might just grab that shotgun out of the back and ... convince you to go get his keys.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Ed T
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 05:48 AM

Maybe, it's time to feed your anger monkey a banana?

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Ed T
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 06:35 AM

There is oxytocin that makes one care and feel empathy towards other people, and testosterone, a potent oxytocin inhibitor. When extra testosterone is given to men, they become more selfish and more entitled. High-testosterone individuals tend to "agressively enforce the rules and punish others for not cooperating".

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: DMcG
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 10:59 AM

I heard some comedian once saying his fantasy was to get the largest and loudest car stereo system he could and drive around playing Radio 4 at full volume. For the non-UK people, that is a (fairly) serious, speech-based radio station...

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 11:12 AM

The question before the court is "What is to stop me?"

Well, Jack, I sympathize, but the big problem is that the guy will see you do it from inside the station and will come out and punch you.

Meanwhile, what's to keep you from opening your windows, turning your stereo on full blast and setting up a counterattack? Lambaste 'em with some Beethoven, maybe. If nothing else, it would complicate the simplistic sound of thug music.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: bobad
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 11:18 AM

Have you always been a control freak?

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 11:25 AM

Many years ago, the guy across the street from me started playing rock music on his porch.. at volume 7 out ot 10, I think.

After 15 min or so, I sat a speaker in my screen door, aimed it at him and put on some serious bagpipe music.
Took....oh... about 5 minutes and he turned it WAY down.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Bert
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 11:45 AM

We did that to a loud neighbor once Bill, only we used a tape of Breton Folk Music. Worked like a charm.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Musket
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 11:53 AM

I suppose we all have the odd fantasy.

Mine tend to be about me being happy rather than upsetting a stranger. Even if his taste in music isn't the same as mine.

Happiness is when you find a wholesaler who sells baby oil in 5 litre containers....

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 12:41 PM

It looks like many of you missed the point that since he is in the store, and can't really hear it the "music" is for me to hear, not him.

When this actually happens, the "music" is invariably a combination of sampled bass and drumbeats interspersed with egotistical cursing, imagine Mather blather on shore leave.

I guess rather than tossing them into the bushes, I could deliver them to him in the store and say. "In spite of what your music says, I do not have intercourse with either of my parents and I am not interested in the sexual habits or bling collection of your various hip hop "artists."

And while we are talking fantasies, There is another I have involving a tow truck, a car crusher, a sturdy chair, some duct tape and a Donovan CD on an infinite loop.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 02:34 PM

I tend to think JtS is venting frustration with all rude people. I certainly know my frustration seems to grow day by day these days. People seem to be increasingly losing The Golden Rule in favour of gaining selfish, childish and downright rude behaviour.

Not only has the young gentleman been extremely rude, he actually has done so ON PURPOSE... who leaves, if not the engine running, the keys in the ignition in the accessory (or on position in late model vehicles)? Only a very rude person. I certainly understand the frustration with rude behaviour and see NO connection with wishing to censor anyone elses' musical tastes.

My fantasy is to, when someone cuts me off in the grocery store aisle or blocks the entire aisle, OBVIOUSLY sees me but ignores me until I say, "Excuse me, may I get by?" and then say, "Sorry.", reply, "No yer not."

Ohhhh wait, that's not a fantasy. My fantasy is to say, rather, "Excuse me. You can see me here. Get some manners and move yer rude ass outta my way you ignorant fuck."

As for being punched, that would be a bonus as our stores have video security cameras.

JtS is not the intolerant party in his fantasy although I would say my ending would be somewhat different. I usually hawk a big loogie on the window... again, not a fantasy.

I should say, however, that as I have lost my physical prowess due to disease and injury, I seldom do such anymore, but seem to want to do so with, as a said above, rising frequency and I find that a very sad commentary on the state of our society manners and upbringing as a whole.

JtS... next time ya see that prick, call me. A properly placed 2" #12 wood screw works exceptionally well (REAR tire, of course... I am not THAT miserable a fantasizer). >;-)

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Don Firth
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 03:06 PM

My sympathies are with Jack. If this gink has his car radio turned up loud enough to implode someone's eardrums and shatter tempered glass windshields, he is intruding on other peoples' space.

There have been a number of times when some brain dead entity has sat in front of my abode at some Gawdawful hour of the night in his tricked up van with the monster speakers and caused the entire neighborhood to pulsate.

I would not really blame anyone for responding with a shotgun blast from an upper window in order to restore peace and quite to the neighborhood. Not necessarily to slay the miscreant, but to deliver an emphatic message and an implied warning.

Aren't there laws against "disturbing the peace?"

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST,Musket sans cookie
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 06:05 PM

Shanty rap....

Bugger shore leave. Go on YouTube and look up Paul Whitehouse and Harry Enfield doing The Self Righteous Brothers.

This thread reminds me of them, funnily enough.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Ebbie
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 07:13 PM

Rather than removing the keys from the offending car why not just turn down the radio volume? Quicker and less likely to spark confrontation.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: katlaughing
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 07:35 PM

Egg-zackly, Ebbie. Since it seems like a transient situation, I'd do my business and leave before doing anything about the music. I have done like BillD only used classical symphonic. The neighbours seemed to get the message.

Musket, I'm off to hear The Self Righteous Bros. now. Thanks for the tip!

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 09:48 PM

Women! SIGH!!! Turn it down? That is simply not a man's fantasy. A man's fantasy is fighting injustice in the face of peril... period. Even if it requires drastic and violent measures, a true fantasy man will step up and get the job done because we are fantasy men who will not tolerate rude bullies. You are welcome, in our own dreams.

Your reality may differ, offer void where prohibited by pussies.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: frogprince
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 10:25 PM

On monday nights in summer, our little "city" has cruise night downtown. Sometimes well over a hundred very eclectic cars turn out: everything from a monstrous 1914 Pierce Arrow to rat rods to fairly radical customs, with some rods and muscle cars with absolute brute engines. The monster horsepower jobs pull into the parking area revving and thundering. It's the right time and place for it, and everyone just grins. Then thursday night, on the old courthouse lawn right in the same area, is concert night; the music volume for this series has been kept very moderate. Seldom or never you don't see more than one yahoo sit on the street within a few yards of the music and gun the hell out of a hopped up engine running little or nothing for a muffler. They have to know damn well what they're doing. My fantasy? Stepping over by them at the edge of the street, and finding out if it's true that a .357 will pierce an engine block.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Little Hawk
Date: 12 Oct 12 - 10:46 PM

We all have fantasies like that from time to time, Jack.

It's fun, isn't it? It provides a small sense of grim satisfaction.

I used to fantasize about blowing my entire high school up (because of all the sadistic bullies there).

Nowadays, though, kids seem to actually be DOING stuff like that! They sure weren't back then. Things have definitely changed.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: DMcG
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 03:11 AM

I used to fantasize about blowing my entire high school up (because of all the sadistic bullies there).

Nowadays, though, kids seem to actually be DOING stuff like that! They sure weren't back then. Things have definitely changed.

Not sure about that one. Part of my primary school burnt down and we pupils all understood that it was a certain classmate of mine who paid a visit out of hours ...

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: saulgoldie
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 09:36 AM

No fantasy: I was in the express lane, "15 items or less(sic)." A well-dressed and appointed women--fur, expensive jewelry--with a slight accent, but who clearly "knew the ropes" was in line in front of me and several others and had more like 25 items by my quick count, and not even multiples of apples or mangos. "Here, let me help you count your items," says I. She thinks about pulling the "I am a confused foreigner and I don't understand your American rules," But quickly realizes that everyone in line *knows* that she really *does* understand. Huffing, she gathers her shtuff and goes to another aisle to the soft delighted cheers from the other customers, and the stifled smirk from the clerk. No fantasy; it really happened!

OTOH, if someone is blasting music from their car window as described, I usually just shoot them a disgusted look, and carry on, glad that I most likely won't see them again. However, if I *were* to see them regularly, I might tell them, "You know, I have trouble with my ears, and your loud music causes me physical pain. Would you mind, please turning it down? Thank you!"

That would be more likely to get cooperation, even if gruding cooperation, and no fists. I mean, how can they get angry about a genuine and non-threatening personal appeal like that? But that is not a fun fantasy. But most of my fun fantasies would also likely have unpleasant consequences.

Saul

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Bert
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 11:21 AM

One of these days I'm going to get a big amplifier and a mic and record the stuff and play it back just as loud but with a small delay.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: kendall
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 11:35 AM

Leave. go to another station.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 12:56 PM

"Huffing, she gathers her shtuff and goes to another aisle to the soft delighted cheers from the other customers, and the stifled smirk from the clerk."

.,,.

Why did the checkout person 'smirk'? Why, I mean to imply by the question, are they not instructed to refuse to check out baskets with more than the max # of items specified by the checkout, but to direct them, after the have queued and reached the till, to another checkout. Surely that would be the most effective way of dealing with such selfish nuisances.

The is not to detract from your effective achievement, Saul; but just to suggest that if the shop were doing its job, it would not have been necessary.

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Ebbie
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 02:30 PM

From observation I think it's the honor system, M. They are told that most people will follow the directive and that if someone doesn't, serve them anyway. I have never seen anyone's count being challenged.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: saulgoldie
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 02:45 PM

I have asked a few clerks about it. They said that they are directed by their managers to "not make a scene" about it. I suspect that many of them would be glad to be more assertive on behalf of the rule-obeying and annoyed other customers if they had managerial support.

Saul

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 04:42 PM

I saw the front end manager come to tell a woman she could NOT check out with 30 items in the 8 item line. She refused. She was not mentally (debatable?) or physically challenged nor did she seem under the influence. They had to check her out. I wanted to say to her male partner who was pushing the cart, "Yer a pussy whipped asshole to let your ignorant bitch embarrass you like that." But I didn't, partially for reasons I cited above. I returned my plums to the bin and left.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 05:21 PM

I see. Thank you, Ebbie & Saul & Gnu. Not sure how that would be dealt with in one of our UK supermarkets. My feeling is that the goods would not be checked out. Anyone know?

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 07:31 PM

gnu - I woulda showed her "Little Tommy" (my Thompson submachine gun) and said "Tommy says you got too much stuff in yer cart for this line. Move to the other line before Tommy gets really mad."

Actually, the gun that works best for this is a pump shotgun. You pump it once to load a round in the chamber and it makes that sound. People are always persuaded.

See the hotel scene with Steve McQueen and Ali McGraw in "The Getaway" for a great demonstration of the maximum persuasion a pump gun can provide.

- Chongo

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 08:01 PM

Pump guns are shit. Chongo may shoot but he don't do it right if he is usin any kinda pump. Now, yer Win Defender would be right up his ass. 13 X two and three quarter on board? That is seriously a fuckup if you can deliver. But, unless you are in a firefight, pumps are shit.

The O/U Baikal 12 full over modified is, hands down, the best* ever. Wouldn't suit Chongo but he is just an ape.

*I would put my Russian Baikal up against any other gun in the world, including my Bro's custom made in Belgium Browning that he won major skeet and trap tournaments with in Europe in the military any dusk in the bush when the wind dies and you can't even hear yourself think for the silence.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Henry Krinkle
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 08:09 PM

I liked the old Remington Model 11 I used to have. Made in the 20's or 30's.
(:-( ))=

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 08:12 PM

Yeah, sure, gnu...but pump guns DO work great for scaring people into changing grocery lines. You gotta admit that, eh?

And whaddya mean, "just an ape"? I've seen way dumber lifeforms than apes at the local Walmart.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 08:15 PM

"any dusk in the bush when the wind dies and you can't even hear yourself think for the silence." requires clarification.

Nooo... it doesn't really. Better it brings a new story...

I'll be brief. Tonight I am sad. I am not able to sit on a pine log that is two hours away from where I sit as I type. I see the very spot in my mind, near a beaver dam... TOO many poplars (some will get that joke). I wanted to be there. I wanted to hear nothing so deeply that it chilled me and I had to snap my fingers near each ear to see if they still worked... if I was still alive, truly alive. I know you don't understand... I wish I could show you.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 08:20 PM

Actually, I think I do understand. I've had moments like that too, but not in quite some time.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 08:25 PM

Walmart has he best prices for ammo or what passes for ammo these days. SheeeeeIT. Since the Yanbks took over CIL I can't buy a decent shotgun shell. DON'T get ne started on THAT. I gave up huntin years ago but that there still pisses me off big time.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: LadyJean
Date: 13 Oct 12 - 11:34 PM

Every now and again, I am plagued by some young male who likes to sit on the bus and rap. I suppose he likes having a captive audience. I have no objection to rap music. I just don't care to listen to it. Especially not on the bus, when I have something to read.

I keep hoping the next time one of those bus rappers sits down the guy in the seat behind him will start playing an accordion.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: Ebbie
Date: 14 Oct 12 - 03:00 AM

Here in Juneau, Alaska, when a person on the bus starts making too much noise, the driver shuts him/her down. That includes Walkmans. A leaking headphone attracts the attention right away.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Oct 12 - 09:34 PM

"One of these days I'm going to get a big amplifier and a mic and record the stuff and play it back just as loud but with a small delay."

Bert, that's beautifully diabolical. You are the master of revenge.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: frogprince
Date: 14 Oct 12 - 10:47 PM

A couple of others that I've come back to over quite a few years:

To get a seasonal job at the post office, and send back Santa Clause letters marked "deceased".

To open a cafe, put up a sign that says "TOPLESS WAITRESSES", and hire only (fully dressed) flat-chested gals as servers.

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST,Shimrod
Date: 15 Oct 12 - 04:36 AM

OK, here's my fantasy:

It's a pleasant summers day and I'm walking down my local high street. A moron, in a 'hot hatch' (if that's the right term?) stops at traffic lights. He's loudly revving a big, noisy engine and he's got his driver's window rolled down and his stereo is blaring out bass heavy 'post-music noise' at maximum volume. I search in my pockets and find that I just happen to have a tear gas grenade - fancy that! I pull the pin and toss it through the open driver's window. The moron hurls himself out of his vehicle coughing and wheezing, eyes streaming. I then find that I also happen to possess a baseball bat - or perhaps, being English, a cricket bat. I use this implement, whatever it happens to be, to belabour the moron's kneecaps with. After a suitable amount of belabouring I toss the implement over my shoulder and stroll on, a happy smile on my face.

This has been an exceptionally violent, but satisfying, fantasy!

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 15 Oct 12 - 05:04 AM

Blimey ~~ if I had some of the fantasies of some of you guys, I should keep them strictly to myself, not proclaim them on an open forum.

Not that I have, of course!


heh heh heh heh

~M~

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 15 Oct 12 - 11:56 AM

Or so you claim...

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 15 Oct 12 - 12:21 PM

heh heh heh in ♠♠♠♠♠

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: gnu
Date: 15 Oct 12 - 02:37 PM

A cousin of mine, "A", and his cousin, "B", are very large lads. In their mid-twenties, they arrived home to find their apartment had been burgled. Something caught A's eye through the living room wondow. The assumed thief, laden with two duffle bags, was struggling over a snowbank between the parking lots of their and the neighbouring apartment buiding. They dashed to A's truck, raced out of their lot and blocked the entrance of the next door parking lot as they saw the asumed thief closing the trunk of his car.

They confronted him and asked to see the contents of the duffle bags. He agreed. As soon as he was out of the car he ran. Bad move. When all three returned to the car, the assumed thief was much more cooperative. The bags were stuffed with their stuff. B asked for the keys and then said, "Get in the trunk." Obviously VERY frightened, he asked what they were going to do and B said, "Call the cops." Tears. He pleaded with them not to do so. They took pity on him. And, they took the duffle bags, his wallet and and his keys. While looking at the thief's driver's licence, B said, "I have nine brothers and I am the runt of the litter. If I ever see you around here again, we WILL find you."

Not a fantasy but a "vicarious"?

Subject: RE: BS: A Fantasy of mine.
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 15 Oct 12 - 06:39 PM

Good to hear, gnu.