Know any autoharpy jokes?

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: banjoman
Date: 01 Dec 08 - 11:13 AM

Whats the difference between Autoharp players and a pot of natural yoghurt??

Natural yoghurt has a living culture

Pete

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Dec 08 - 08:21 PM

Yay, thanks folks thats a great start.

Cheers,

Andrez

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,Harttman
Date: 04 Jan 10 - 06:00 PM

what's the difference between an autoharp and a lawnmower?

If you borrow your neighbor's lawnmower for a month they ask to have it back.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: autoharper
Date: 04 Jan 10 - 06:08 PM

Did you here the one about the autoharp player who was so out-of-tune the other autoharp players noticed?

-Adam Miller

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 05 Jan 10 - 11:55 AM

Once--true story--I was coerced into tuning 14 autoharps in one afternoon. It waas NOT funny.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Bill D
Date: 05 Jan 10 - 01:17 PM

..and by the time you get to #14, 1-6 are out of tune again.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: PHJim
Date: 05 Jan 10 - 02:08 PM

Bryan Bowers tells a story about a woman who misheard and thought he played "auto parts".

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Ebbie
Date: 05 Jan 10 - 11:02 PM

Substitution here: It takes a village to tune an autoharp.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: PHJim
Date: 06 Jan 10 - 12:54 PM

Sorry if this has already been posted.

Q - What's the difference between a Harley and an Autoharp?
A - You can tune a Harley.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: catspaw49
Date: 06 Jan 10 - 12:59 PM

Yeah, but the autoharp doesn't leak oil.............Makes the joke on both things.


Spaw

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Art Thieme
Date: 07 Jan 10 - 12:15 PM

It was invented to be an IUD for Catherine The Great !!!

Art

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: DonMeixner
Date: 07 Jan 10 - 12:56 PM

Q: How do get and Autoharp player off your porch?
A: Pay him for the Pizza.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: terrier
Date: 07 Jan 10 - 06:32 PM

This thread has just sent me off to find zither playing on YouTube. This guy can sit on my porch anytime. Now I want a Zither!!
Anton Karas

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: autoharpbob
Date: 12 Apr 10 - 06:35 AM

Well I suppose we have to laugh or we start crying.....

Cathy Britell just did a concert at Sore Fingers with DAN CRARY as her accompanist. Obviously he did not feel the autoharp was a completely useless instrument. He did however make a joke, along these lines.

"Seems that there are several concert halls full of cobwebs and skeletons, where they decided to tune the autoharp to the guitar instead of the other way round!"

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,Brian Daniels
Date: 12 Apr 10 - 02:28 PM

I'm a banjo player so feel not too guilty about this combo banjo auto-harp joke.

Q: What do you call it when you toss a banjo into a dumpster and it hits an autoharp?

A: Perfect pitch

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: beeliner
Date: 16 Apr 10 - 01:32 AM

Bryan Bowers once told me he could not use an electronic tuner, because he felt that 'perfect' tuning was not right...the whole thing needs to be 'slightly' sharp at the lowed end and flat at the higher end!.

Just how sharp and how flat are we talking here? I'd like to try it.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Mr Red
Date: 16 Apr 10 - 06:41 AM

er- make the wire cutters sharp and the hammer flat?




I'll get my coat...........

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: autoharpbob
Date: 07 Jun 10 - 11:07 AM

One from Mike Fenton this last weekend -

Travelling through the amazon jungle in a canoe, the explorers heard the sound of drumming. They turned to their guide and asked what this meant.

"Drumming good. Tribe happy. No worries. When drums stop, that bad"

Further up river, the drumming suddenly stopped, and the explorers saw their guide cowering in the bottom of the canoe, shivering.

"Drumming stopped. Next come autoharp solo"

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,Bardan
Date: 08 Jun 10 - 04:33 AM

Surely it should be obvious why there aren't any autoharp jokes in the long list of *musical instrument* jokes?

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Jun 10 - 07:11 PM

*groan* these jokes where you just substitute 'autoharp' for 'banjo' or something else do get wearing.

c'mon... write one that's relevant or give up.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: DADGBE
Date: 09 Jun 10 - 01:01 AM

Some years ago I taught an autoharp class at the California Bluegrass Association's Father's day teaching camp. Yup, they actually hired me and I only had to pay 'em $500 to let me.

The class was looked down upon by the hot shots and was supposed to be for the blue haired wives of the 'real' musicians. Turned out that there were some fine players in attendance.

To bolster their egos and have fun with our second class status, I handed out home made buttons to the participants each day. They were as follows:

"I have more strings than you do!"
"It's an Autoharp. You got a problem with that?!" and,
"Autoharpers push my buttons!"

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,Acoustest
Date: 26 Jul 10 - 07:00 PM

Came to this thred VERY late, but,,,
Q: Know the difference between a banjo and an autoharp?
A: An autoharp burns longer!
(and I play both!)

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: PHJim
Date: 26 Jul 10 - 07:40 PM

An Autoharp/accordion duo was asked to play for a New Years' Party at an old folks' home. Glad to have a gig, they said,"Sure." and were a hit with the old hard-of-hearing seniors*. The administrator paid them and said,"That was great guys. Do you think you'll be available next New Years.
"Sure," said the Autoharp player,"Would it be all right if we left our stuff here?"


*No offence to seniors meant. I are one.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: PHJim
Date: 26 Jul 10 - 07:42 PM

Also no offence meant to Autoharpists nor accordion players. I fit in both of those catagories too.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,BillD2 (Yes, another harpist with the same m
Date: 31 May 12 - 09:13 PM

The autoharp might burn longer, but the long-necked thing dies from its incurable malignant quintifiliated banjoma.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Bill D
Date: 01 Jun 12 - 09:40 AM

The joke thread that never dies!

...or maybe *I* have been reincarnated..... *pinching self*.....

naawwww, I'm still here... I guess there can be several Bills with 'D' as last initial. But I never studied banjo diseases at Harvard Medical.

'Banjoma' sounds serious! You suppose that amputating that 5th string might save one?

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,Seonaid
Date: 01 Jun 12 - 03:55 PM

Autoharps: More twang for your buck!

(Our two instruments are named Otto and Harpo, BTW...)

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,Seonaid
Date: 01 Jun 12 - 04:05 PM

Autoharps: Strum-thing for everyone....

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: Bill D
Date: 01 Jun 12 - 04:22 PM

You Otto be ashamed.. that Marx you as high-strung

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: GUEST,corgimom
Date: 07 Oct 14 - 11:25 PM

Tuning an autoharp is like wrestling with an octopus. Just when you get one arm pinned another one slips out.

Subject: RE: Know any autoharpy jokes?
From: LadyJean
Date: 08 Oct 14 - 12:52 AM

I offered a lemonharp on mudcat last spring. It is now in Fredricksburg, I hope enjoying a fuller and happier life.

The friend's son, a blues guitarist, I asked to tune it for me, wound up taking it apart. So it didn't look so great when I gave it to the guy from Fredricksburg. I hope it looks better now.