BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 01 Oct 15 - 07:01 PM

Short clip... vintage, authentic Litella by Radner:

https://youtu.be/BqLUIoRB7Wg

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 26 Sep 15 - 10:58 AM

I'm not happy that some Facebook game is about Old Wives Tails! Old Wives work hard, and our Tails are nobody's business but our husbands'!!! And I do not like any part of my body called a Tail! That's Chopinesque!!! Lisa Loopner called me up about this, and she was very upset-- to think Todd might dare to call her an Old Tail when she grows up! This must be stopped!

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Janie
Date: 25 Aug 15 - 08:39 PM

Wish I had the wit of some of you phrase it for the game. This will have to do. Years ago, in a very rough and loud bar we did not usually attend, my sister tried to place a drink order for a Harvey Wallbanger over a loud crowd and louder band. She and the waitress shouted at each other repeatedly, until the waitress finally nodded that she had heard.

Ten minutes later she brought Sis a hard boiled egg.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Aug 15 - 11:00 PM

Megan, I was going to say that! My wife like to make bed coverings and my niece asked years ago, after reading a letter, if she was really guilty. Her mother, who also makes quilts, explained.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST,DrWord
Date: 24 Aug 15 - 10:45 PM

Incinerator. Good one.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 24 Aug 15 - 06:56 PM

Good one, Megan L! I didn't notice that!

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Megan L
Date: 24 Aug 15 - 11:33 AM

Spoonerisms,our neighbour came in just after her daughter had given birth and announced "the baby was so small when it was born the nurses put it straight in the incinerator."

Guest that was cruel calling chanty lass a sewer I didn't think her language was that bad. Mind you it may have been the chamber pot that caused the problem.

OK I'm going before I get lynched

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST,DrWord
Date: 24 Aug 15 - 11:08 AM

Along with Mrs Malaprop, Emily, and other mildly hearing impaired and/or low-verbal folk--several close relatives come to mind--is the Trailer Park Boys' subliterate character 'Ricky'. One of my aforementioned family is so fond of mangling the language that when I catch him yanking my chain I call him Ricky. Wish I could summon a splendid Rickyism for you ~ this is my kinda BS thread. Keep 'em comin'.
& keep on pickin'
dennis

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 24 Aug 15 - 09:18 AM

What is Tea Mobile up to, offering telephone discounts for GLTE people! First it was LGB people! A person just gets used to THAT and before you know it, it's discounts for Bruce Janney and little green men! Are those little green men really men... or are the little green women getting discounts too!?!? This is not fair! How can a pink company keep out all the colors except green! And what are those B people doing now without their discounts!?! Do the people in the Tea Party support this!?!?

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: michaelr
Date: 01 Jul 15 - 06:39 PM

Good one, Susan!

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 01 Jul 15 - 02:47 PM

What's all this about Madonna for FIFA president? What the heck would a singer know about soccer! And how can a old slut fix FIFA's PR problems anyway!

(BS: Maradonna for FIFA president?)

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Mr Red
Date: 01 Jun 15 - 05:54 AM

And playing the London derrier conjours strange toughts.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST, DTM
Date: 31 May 15 - 06:20 AM

I've always wondered how a Mexican got into the American National Anthem.
"Jose can you see, in the ......"

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST, topsie
Date: 31 May 15 - 04:12 AM

I never came across the word 'denier' in sewing classes - I only encountered it when buying stockings (which haven't done since about 1962) or tights (which happens only rarely). Strangely, it doesn't seem to apply to socks.

Oh yes ... the thread
I keep hearing about attacks on drink and cigarettes, and a tax on historic ruins in the Middle East. Very confusing.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 30 May 15 - 10:32 PM

GUEST, I have sewn and sowed and liked and been good at neither. Therefore I have done little of either! I learned the word denier in sewing classes in 7th and 8th grade. I barely passed those classes.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: michaelr
Date: 30 May 15 - 12:34 PM

What's all this I hear about Canadian Tarzans destroying the environment? There was only one Tarzan; he lived in Africa and was a friend of the environment! It just doesn't make sense.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 30 May 15 - 03:57 AM

I think the UK chancellor should be arrested for cruelty to animals. Why would he keep a budgie in a case and only let it out once a year?

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Little Robyn
Date: 30 May 15 - 12:43 AM

One of the electricians where I used to work wanted a pair of circular cutting snips - so he could cut circulars. We thought that was probably the best way to deal with a staff circular. He also said that the management was a laxative. We actually agreed with him on that one!

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST
Date: 30 May 15 - 12:38 AM

ChanteyLass, your post sent me to the dictionary to find out how you could have thought denier suggests fabric. And now I know, and I've concluded that since you already knew that you must be a sewer.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 29 May 15 - 07:45 PM

One of my many Emily Litella moments came when I started reading about someone referred to as a climate denier and wondered how fabrics had anything to do with climate and what that meant when the term was applied to someone.

While writing the previous paragraph, auto-correct changed Emily's name to Emily Literal. I guess my confusion over the word denier made me Emily Illiteral.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: lefthanded guitar
Date: 29 May 15 - 05:40 PM

Why are these ecology people taking over everthing, including our country and our national anthem???? I'm as much as a nature lover as anyone, but enough is enough!!!!

My country is a nation. My country is a republic. But last time I looked at the constitution; I can assure you that NO WHERE does it say that " my country is a tree."

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Mr Red
Date: 29 May 15 - 04:16 AM

send three and fourpence we're going to a dance WW1 example of:

What the UK used to refer to as "Chinese Whispers".

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: wysiwyg
Date: 28 May 15 - 12:53 PM

Why can't people just agree that yolk music is just about a chicken crossing a road, or maybe the true origin like whether the egg came first! And even if they can't agree, the wet rats up on the rope don't have to have blame war over it because it's not really about wgo put the mop in the dew pot! All they need to do is remember they're all sawing the same great thieme!

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST,crazy little woman
Date: 27 May 15 - 11:14 PM

I've looked hard on the net, but I can't find any mp3's of the Steel Ice Band.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: Mrrzy
Date: 27 May 15 - 08:58 PM

What's all this fuss about Emily the teller? People who work in banks deserve more respect!

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: michaelr
Date: 27 May 15 - 12:33 AM

What's all this I hear about Granny awards? Why should some young rock star get a Granny award?? My granny worked hard until she got old. It doesn't make sense!

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST
Date: 26 May 15 - 06:26 PM

"Heart castration" is typical of the mistakes people make in a second language. I think the Spanish word for castrate, castrar, also means weaken. Maybe Father Loi had a weak heart? Or maybe they said catheterization and he heard castration.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: GUEST
Date: 26 May 15 - 05:11 PM

StingRay is a brand of mobile phone spying device that the FBI has used. There was some controversy about them using it without a warrant.

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: CupOfTea
Date: 26 May 15 - 04:10 PM

heh. I never thought of Emily Litella, but we have a guy at work who gets things the wrong way around so often we call them "Bertisms." Bert is from the Dominican Republic, is VERY opinionated, passionate, and prolifically verbal at very high volume.

He got quite irate with us when we all fell into gales of laughter at his pronouncement that "Father Loi had a heart castration!" "It's not funny! Is very serious when they do that!"

Last week's rant was about the bad guys the FBI had found out about because "they gave them a stingray" This left us wondering... did the FBI have a laser ray they used in their sting?... could an FBI sports team be called "the Stingrays" Something fishy about the whole thing. We were giggling for hours.

The difference between Bert and Emily, is she'd be relieved she was wrong, but once Bert has an idea in his head, it's nearly impossible to change it, no matter how far-fetched.

Joanne in Cleveland

Subject: RE: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: michaelr
Date: 25 May 15 - 02:18 PM

Who are these women I keep hearing about - Marge and Tina - and why are they crying? There's even a song about them: "Don't cry for me, Marge and Tina!"

Subject: BS: Let's play 'Emily Litella'
From: michaelr
Date: 25 May 15 - 02:14 PM

Fans of Saturday Night Live will remember the late, lamented comedienne Gilda Radner's indelible characters, including Emily Litella, who
appeared on the fake-news "Weekend Update" segment opposite Chevy Chase and Jane Curtin. Emily would object to something that had been said on the broadcast, only to be informed that she had misheard a crucial word or expression (sort of a comedic mondegreen).
I have amused myself many times by coming up with similar situations, and think it may amuse others to play this game. I'll start it off with my next post.