Proverbs For The New Millennium

Subject: Proverbs For The Millennium
From: Neil Lowe
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 08:52 AM

Like Kat, I too hate the BS designation. But for those of us who have not figured out from the title that this is BS, let me state unequivocally that THIS IS BS. If you clicked here by mistake, please accept my humble apology for wasting your time. Thank you.

--adapted from The Unabashed Librarian:

Home is where you hang your @.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single click.

Speak softly and carry a cellular phone.

Pentium wise; pen and paper foolish.

The modem is the message.

The geek shall inherit the earth.

Fax is stranger than fiction.

What boots up must come down.

Windows will never cease.

There's no place like

As pentinence for my sins I plan to submit a Lyric Add later.

Regards, Neil

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Neil Lowe
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 08:54 AM

Addendum: the last one should read: There's no place like http://www.home.com

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 09:51 AM

"Hi, my name is Mindspring, and I'll be your server tonight"

"Build a better mouse, and you'll beat a path to the world's door"

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: MMario
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 10:05 AM

Be it ever so humble, there's no place like your homepage.

A click in time, saves nine.

The modem makes the man.

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Mbo
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 10:07 AM

In space, no one can see your screen.

ROAMING in the gloaming can be expensive.

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Mbo
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 10:08 AM

In space, no one can see your screen.

ROAMING in the gloaming can be expensive.

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: katlaughing
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 10:18 AM

A rolling ball gathers no moss.

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Mbo
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 10:22 AM

He's tied to his motherboard's daisy chains.

I'm going to sit right down and write myself an e-mail, and pretend it came from you...

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: The Shambles
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 02:48 PM

FU2...?

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Charlie Baum
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 03:41 PM

Write me a letter
Send it by e-mail
Send it in care of
www.birminghamjail.gov

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Jeri
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 04:46 PM

Well, as long as Charlie wrote a song first...I sent this to the rec.music.folk newsgroup a while back.

Daisy, Daisy read my chain letter do
You may think I'm crazy, but I swear it all is true
Then send it to five others
Their sisters and their brothers
And you will stash
A lot of cash
Off this e-mail I sent to you

Moron, moron, I read your chain letter through
I'd be crazy to do what you said to do
So take your bloody spamming
Dispose of it by cramming
I hope you're flamed
By all those named
When the e-mail comes back to you

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: katlaughing
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 06:31 PM

LMAOWROTF, Jeri!

I don't care how they did back home; THIS is MY domain!

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Mbo
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 08:11 PM

Ohhh what a tangled web browser we need, when we practise to receive.

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 08:44 PM

Don't change servers in the middle of a bit-stream(?)

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Mbo
Date: 09 Dec 99 - 09:10 PM

Don't put the driver before the device.

You can lead a browser to a website, but you can't make it connect.

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: annamill
Date: 10 Dec 99 - 12:38 PM

Shambles is back!! Welcome back Shambles!! I know I've been away for a while. When did this happen?

Love, annap

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: MMario
Date: 10 Dec 99 - 12:50 PM

Never cut the line that connects you.

Don't be a troll in the forum.

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: paddymac
Date: 10 Dec 99 - 05:06 PM

Hilarious. But I like Larry's "save some liver cells for old age".

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Roger the skiffler
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 03:59 AM

One I've used in the Tavern threads:
In the virtual ballroom, no-one can tread on your toes.
RtS

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Bugsy
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 04:23 AM

One my mother told me, which carried me through over half this century:

"Always wear clean underwear. You never know when you might be run over"

(involved in an automobile accident)

CHeers

Bugsy

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: Micca
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 09:20 AM

One is reminded of the immaculate Tom Lehrer one " Life is like a sewer, what you get out of it depends on what you put into it"

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: paddymac
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 12:56 PM

Geez, Bugsy, I thought that one originated with my Grandma.

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: jeffp
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 01:18 PM

Y2K? Because one K just isn't enough.

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 01:25 PM

Okay, folks, there ain't gonna be no Armageddon, so get on with your lives.

Cybersex is safe sex: your site or mine?

--seed (off and running on a rare Monday work day).

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: InOBU
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 03:32 PM

To add a bit to Jeffp... Y2K? Because one is not enough, and three is too bloody many!
All the best
Larry (lacking lots of liver)

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: kendall
Date: 13 Dec 99 - 07:37 PM

I'm not the man I used to think I was

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: bseed(charleskratz)
Date: 14 Dec 99 - 02:59 AM

Gawd, ain't that the truth, Kendall. In a time of deep depression 35 or so years ago I wrote this song. Pardon its irreverence, folks.

A SHITTY SHITTY WORLD (tune: De Titanic, long verses, Jesse James)


(chorus)
It's a shitty, shitty world,
It's a shitty, shitty world,
It's a shitty, shitty world,
I'm telling you.
It's a shitty, shitty world
And I'd like to leave it,
But I guess I'll stick around a week or two.

I dreamed of a world all bright and new
Where the air smells fresh and sweet,
Where the sun shines down out of heaven up above,
And the flowers bloom all around your feet,
But it takes a lot of shit to make the roses grow,
So I guess that world I dream of just can't be--
But I'll never ever know until I leave this shitty world,
So, my friends, you have seen the last of me.

There are lots of shitty places in this shitty shitty world;
I've been stuck in quite a few.
If there are any places where the shit ain't so deep,
I don't think I can point them out for you.

There are lots of shitty people in this shitty shitty world,
Yes, I've known quite a few.
I used to think that I was made out of finer stuff,
But now I know that that just isn't true.*

It's a shitty, shitty world, it's a shitty, shitty world,
Oh, where did all the shit come from,
I guess the good lord up above has been shitting on us,
From the day the world begun.

*I used to sing the last two lines of this verse

I know that I'm made out of finer stuff
But I'm not very sure about you.


--seed

Subject: RE: Proverbs For The New Millennium
From: kendall
Date: 14 Dec 99 - 01:08 PM

my sentiments exactly!! thanks seed