Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane

Subject: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Rusty Dobro
Date: 20 Dec 17 - 06:29 AM

I've been meaning to add this for some time, then found out today that there's a Dr Demento parody with the same title. Mine takes a different approach:

Libyan On A Jet Plane

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go,
I'm standing here at check-out four,
And Easyjet are just about to fly,
But the pilot’s nervous, he’s in a sweat,
I don’t think I’ll be boarding yet,
Already I’m a problem, and here’s why:
Security has come for me, all around surrounding me,
They hold me like they’ll never let me go.
’Cos I'm a Libyan on a jet plane, just trying to go home again.
I wish they’d let me go.
There's so many times I've caught this flight,
So many times, it’s all gone right,
I'll tell you that don't matter in the least,
I’ve told them that I live in Kent,
I pay my taxes, pay my rent,
But my passport shows I’m from the Middle East,
So ‘phone up my brief for me, tell him that they’re holding me,
They look as though they’ll never let me go.
I'm a Libyan on a jet plane, just trying to go home again.
I wish they’d let me go.
They’ve searched my bags and searched my shoes,
They’ve found no Semtex, found no fuse,
Any moment I’ll be in the skies,
But then I’m dragged behind a screen,
For rubber gloves and Vaseline,
And yes, it does bring tears into your eyes,
So hold up the flight for me, ’cos I’m walking with some difficulty,
Please let me stand up till we reach Heathrow,
‘Cos I’m a Libyan on a jet plane, feeling lots of rectal pain,
A Libyan on a jet plane, just trying to go home again,
I wish they’d let me go……..

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Rusty Dobro
Date: 20 Dec 17 - 06:33 AM

Coo!300,000 years of human evolution, and we end up with a machine that converts apostrophes to question marks.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 20 Dec 17 - 06:58 AM

I thought it was more like 200,000 years for humans.
And I think that a lot of that time involved neither evolution nor progress. Sometimes we even seem to be regressing.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 20 Dec 17 - 07:33 AM

I like it.
And if others do it would be pointless numerous people having to re-type it:

Libyan On A Jet Plane

All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go,
I'm standing here at check-out four,
And Easyjet are just about to fly,
But the pilot's nervous, he's in a sweat,
I don't think I'll be boarding yet,
Already I'm a problem, and here's why:
Security has come for me, all around surrounding me,
They hold me like they'll never let me go.
'Cos I'm a Libyan on a jet plane, just trying to go home again.
I wish they'd let me go.

There's so many times I've caught this flight,
So many times, it's all gone right,
I'll tell you that don't matter in the least,
I've told them that I live in Kent,
I pay my taxes, pay my rent,
But my passport shows I'm from the Middle East,
So 'phone up my brief for me, tell him that they're holding me,
They look as though they'll never let me go.
I'm a Libyan on a jet plane, just trying to go home again.
I wish they'd let me go.

They've searched my bags and searched my shoes,
They've found no Semtex, found no fuse,
Any moment I'll be in the skies,
But then I'm dragged behind a screen,
For rubber gloves and Vaseline,
And yes, it does bring tears into your eyes,
So hold up the flight for me, 'cos I'm walking with some difficulty,
Please let me stand up till we reach Heathrow,
'Cos I'm a Libyan on a jet plane, feeling lots of rectal pain,
A Libyan on a jet plane, just trying to go home again,
I wish they'd let me go. . .

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Rusty Dobro
Date: 20 Dec 17 - 08:21 AM

Thank you, Nigel! You are clearly a fully evolved human being.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 23 Dec 17 - 10:56 AM

I did wonder what this song might be about, being posted almost on the 29th anniversay of the PanAm disaster.
But although increasingly graphic as it gets to the "bottom" of it, a good song which makes a very valid point. Well done, Rusty!

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Rusty Dobro
Date: 24 Dec 17 - 03:40 AM

Thanks, TB - nowadays I tend to introduce it as 'my song for Donald'.
Incidentally, I've just realised second line should read 'check-in', not 'out'.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Libyan On A Jet Plane
From: Mrrzy
Date: 24 Dec 17 - 07:56 AM

Nicely done, indeed. I'll have to check out the other take.