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Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)

DigiTrad:
GLENCOE
SHORES OF SUTHERLAND
SMILE IN YOUR SLEEP


Related threads:
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Lyr Add: The Fire Raisers (Jim Mclean) (1)


Jim McLean 13 May 18 - 07:01 AM
GUEST,Gallus Moll (away from home!) 13 May 18 - 07:20 AM
Jim McLean 13 May 18 - 07:53 AM
Tattie Bogle 13 May 18 - 03:25 PM
Dave Hanson 14 May 18 - 02:24 AM
Peter the Squeezer 16 May 18 - 02:19 PM
GUEST,Pat Cooksey. 17 May 18 - 05:20 AM
Richard Mellish 17 May 18 - 07:06 AM
Dave Hanson 17 May 18 - 08:06 AM
Richard Mellish 17 May 18 - 08:55 AM
Jim McLean 17 May 18 - 10:55 AM
Jim McLean 17 May 18 - 11:30 AM
Jos 17 May 18 - 11:54 AM
Jim McLean 17 May 18 - 11:55 AM
Jos 17 May 18 - 12:04 PM
Gallus Moll 17 May 18 - 01:15 PM
Jos 17 May 18 - 01:31 PM
Pete MacGregor 17 May 18 - 02:56 PM
Dave Hanson 17 May 18 - 03:11 PM
Jim McLean 17 May 18 - 04:15 PM
Tattie Bogle 17 May 18 - 05:08 PM
Jim McLean 18 May 18 - 04:09 AM
GUEST 19 May 18 - 09:42 AM
goatfell 19 May 18 - 11:40 AM
GUEST,Observer 19 May 18 - 12:42 PM
Tattie Bogle 19 May 18 - 03:01 PM
GUEST,bradfordian 21 May 18 - 01:09 PM
Jim McLean 22 May 18 - 03:54 AM
banjoman 22 May 18 - 05:11 AM
GUEST,Observer 22 May 18 - 06:02 AM
Jim McLean 22 May 18 - 11:02 AM
GUEST,Observer 22 May 18 - 12:51 PM
GUEST,Observer 23 May 18 - 03:44 AM
Jim McLean 23 May 18 - 04:20 AM
GUEST,Observer 23 May 18 - 05:58 AM
Jim McLean 23 May 18 - 06:47 AM
Johnny J 23 May 18 - 07:33 AM
GUEST,Observer 23 May 18 - 07:39 AM
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Subject: Lyr Add: Royal wedding
From: Jim McLean
Date: 13 May 18 - 07:01 AM

I once was a lady who knew her own mind.
I stood up for women and all of mankind.
But along came Prince Harry to make me his bride
So I knelt down before him and swallowed my pride,
    With a toorali oorali oorali ay.

I won't need to wait for a passport like some,
Prince Harry just whispered a word to his mum
Who spoke to Theresa and they all did their bit,
They Windrushed me a passport so now I'm a Brit.
    With a ....

My wedding will cost just a few hundred grand
For horses, policemen and soldiers so grand.
And some of the public will get an invite,
But bring your own picnic for money is tight.
      With a ....

No tax on our bedrooms, you've paid for our rent,
No mortgage or gas bills, not even a cent.
And soon there'll be babies, one, two maybe three.
I won't have to worry for EVERYTHING'S FREE!
                                       
      With a ....

I'll never be Queen, there're too many up front.
Camellia and Catherine both in the hunt.
So maybe I'll move to a wee Scottish glen
For Scotland will be a Republic by then."
      With a ....


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding
From: GUEST,Gallus Moll (away from home!)
Date: 13 May 18 - 07:20 AM

Thank you Jim....another great piece of social commmentary to add to your brilliant body of work!
Thank goodness for a counter to all the sycophantic sh*te and union jackism sweeping these islands; less up here than where you are, must be difficult ignoring it all down South!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding
From: Jim McLean
Date: 13 May 18 - 07:53 AM

To be honest, BGM, I'm not really aware of much Royal fervour here in North London, Highgate borders. It's mainly the press and TV who are pushing the wedding, I see nothing in the streets but I wouldn't rule out Windsor!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 13 May 18 - 03:25 PM

Good to see that ye cannae keep a guid songwriter doon, Jim!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 14 May 18 - 02:24 AM

Nice one Jim.

Dave H


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Peter the Squeezer
Date: 16 May 18 - 02:19 PM

Like it!!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Pat Cooksey.
Date: 17 May 18 - 05:20 AM

Nice one Jim.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Richard Mellish
Date: 17 May 18 - 07:06 AM

Not bad, except for "Prince Harry just whispered a word to his mum".

Tricky: she's been dead for some while. His grandmother however ...


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 17 May 18 - 08:06 AM

pedant.


Dave H


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Richard Mellish
Date: 17 May 18 - 08:55 AM

I can delight in being a pedant sometimes, but I don't count as pendantry pointing out that Prince Harry's mother is long (sadly) deceased.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 17 May 18 - 10:55 AM

Richard, thanks, your 'dead right' of course!!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 17 May 18 - 11:30 AM

Just change Prince Charles for Harry in verse 2.
Thanks again Richard.

I once was a lady who knew her own mind.
I stood up for women and all of mankind.
But along came Prince Harry to make me his bride
So I knelt down before him and swallowed my pride,
    With a toorali oorali oorali ay.

I won't need to wait for a passport like some,
Prince Charles just whispered a word to his mum
Who spoke to Theresa and they all did their bit,
They Windrushed me a passport so now I'm a Brit.
    With a ....

My wedding will cost just a few hundred grand
For horses, policemen and soldiers so grand.
And some of the public will get an invite,
But bring your own picnic for money is tight.
      With a ....

No tax on our bedrooms, you've paid for our rent,
No mortgage or gas bills, not even a cent.
And soon there'll be babies, one, two maybe three.
I won't have to worry for EVERYTHING'S FREE!
                                       
      With a ....

I'll never be Queen, there're too many up front.
Camellia and Catherine both in the hunt.
So maybe I'll move to a wee Scottish glen
For Scotland will be a Republic by then."
      With a ....


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jos
Date: 17 May 18 - 11:54 AM

... or keep 'Prince Harry' and change 'mum' to 'gran'.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 17 May 18 - 11:55 AM

Gran doesn't rhyme with some, Jos.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jos
Date: 17 May 18 - 12:04 PM

OK, Prince Charles it is.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Gallus Moll
Date: 17 May 18 - 01:15 PM

is it Camellia --- of Camilla?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jos
Date: 17 May 18 - 01:31 PM

Should be Camilla.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Pete MacGregor
Date: 17 May 18 - 02:56 PM

Sorry , I can't get beyond

Ah! ça ira, ça ira, ça ira
les aristocrates à la lanterne!

We're being too nice to these parasites.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 17 May 18 - 03:11 PM

Should be Carmilla, as in, ' Carmilla ' by Sheridan Le Fanu, [ Bram Stokers nephew ]

Dave H


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 17 May 18 - 04:15 PM

It should be Camilla but I'm not very good at Royal names!! I tend to call them by any old name.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 17 May 18 - 05:08 PM

Good to see this is provoking more interest as the day approaches!
Though you haven't specified a tune, Jim, it seems to me it fits to "Threshing Machine/Sweet Betsy from Pike".
And just to be completely topical, how about an additional verse re Meghan's Dad's various machinations? Might fit after v2?
"I hoped that my Dad might walk me down the aisle,
But he's let loose the cameras on his new wedding style,
He said it was all done in best of intent,
But now he's in hospital getting his stent.
Toora-loo, etc"


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 18 May 18 - 04:09 AM

Tattie Bogle, the tune is Villikins and his Dinah, also know to Scots as "The Wee Magic Stane" and to others as "A Soldier and a Sailer".
As to extra verses, good on ye, but I try to stick to the "truth" (?) and reports about Mr Markle are all hear say based on a PR machine. Who knows, maybe he isn't sick at all.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST
Date: 19 May 18 - 09:42 AM

Watched it and the music was superb.

Had a bit of a chuckle though considering the other big events of the day considering Wills being Patron of the FA. Brought to mind a verse of a Glasgow song I think is called "The Wedding". It starts:

"There's a weddin' in a wee church
Tae the side o' Glasgae Greem
Tween a lassie and a sodjer hame on leave
And there's roses and carnations
and white lilies for the bride
and her faither's got the shotgun up his sleeve


One of the verses goes

Will ye tak this wummin tae be
Yer lawful wedded wife
Tae stand by her until the bitter end
Ah for God's sake get a move on
And get this bloody ower
And we'll maybe get a pint afore the game.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: goatfell
Date: 19 May 18 - 11:40 AM

Great song


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Observer
Date: 19 May 18 - 12:42 PM

Not wishing to venture below the line but to answer the following question which might be a bit confusing for a Yank put by keberoxu:

Subject: RE: BS: of dukes and duchesses
From: keberoxu
Date: 19 May 18 - 12:00 PM

Now all we need is a Duke of Lancaster
and they can re-enact
the War of the Roses.


No need there already is a Duke of Lancaster - She's commonly referred to as The Queen.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 19 May 18 - 03:01 PM

Thanks for the tune info, Jim!
As for "the truth" - who knows?!
Glad to see some other posts on this thread have apparently been removed!


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,bradfordian
Date: 21 May 18 - 01:09 PM

Taken the liberty of a couple of minor alterations now the event is past tense.
Also replaced republic in last verse for independent because Megs would otherwise have no chance of being a queen. That ok Jim?

Royal wedding (Jim McLean)

I once was a lady who knew her own mind.
I stood up for women and all of mankind.
But along came Prince Harry to make me his bride
So I knelt down before him and swallowed my pride,
    With a toorali oorali oorali ay.

I didn’t have to wait for a passport like some,
Prince Charles just whispered a word to his mum
Who spoke to Theresa and they all did their bit,
They Windrushed me a passport so now I'm a Brit.
    With a toorali oorali oorali ay.

My wedding it cost just a few hundred grand
For horses, policemen and soldiers so grand.
And some of the public they got an invite,
But brought their own picnic for money is tight.
      With a toorali oorali oorali ay.

No tax on our bedrooms, you pay for our rent,
No mortgage or gas bills, not even a cent.
And soon there'll be babies, one, two maybe three.
I won't have to worry for EVERYTHING'S FREE!
With a toorali oorali oorali ay

I'll never be Queen, there're too many up front.
Camilla and Catherine, both in the hunt.
So maybe I'll move to a wee Scottish glen
For Scotland will be independent by then."
      With a toorali oorali oorali ay.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 22 May 18 - 03:54 AM

Hi Bradfordian, both words rely on wishes to come true. I'm a Republican and one relies on the other. Either word suits me but Republican is a stronger commitment as far as I am concerned. There may be Independence voters who are not Republicans but they wouldn't like the song anyway.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: banjoman
Date: 22 May 18 - 05:11 AM

It sickens me that we are now getting re-runs of the wedding and no doubt today will be headlined as the first public duty of the "Newlyweds" hosting a garden party at Buck House which I presume we are all paying for.
A great song which fits my sentiments thanks


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Observer
Date: 22 May 18 - 06:02 AM

I went through the following exercise with another song on the "Folk History" thread - Errors, misinformation and inaccuracies detailed in italics. I know it the song was written and intended as a bit of a dig but it does show how "folk history" cannot be relied upon, not that this little ditty will have any legs at all - instantly, and thankfully, forgettable.

Jim McLean's Wedding Song

I once was a lady who knew her own mind.
I stood up for women and all of mankind.
But along came Prince Harry to make me his bride
So I knelt down before him and swallowed my pride,
    With a toorali oorali oorali ay.

I won't need to wait for a passport like some,
Prince Charles just whispered a word to his mum
Who spoke to Theresa and they all did their bit,
They Windrushed me a passport so now I'm a Brit.

    With a ....

My wedding will cost just a few hundred grand
For horses, policemen and soldiers so grand.
And some of the public will get an invite,
But bring your own picnic for money is tight.

      With a ....

No tax on our bedrooms, you've paid for our rent,
No mortgage or gas bills, not even a cent.
And soon there'll be babies, one, two maybe three.
I won't have to worry for EVERYTHING'S FREE!

                                       
      With a ....

I'll never be Queen, there're too many up front.
Camellia and Catherine both in the hunt.
So maybe I'll move to a wee Scottish glen
For Scotland will be a Republic by then."
      With a ....

Not really much left of the song that reflects reality, but that was never the intention of the composer of this little ditty.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 22 May 18 - 11:02 AM

I think GUEST:Observer is in denial.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Observer
Date: 22 May 18 - 12:51 PM

Don't think so Jim. Do you want me to take you through them?

1: So I knelt down before him and swallowed my pride

Never happened pure invention and judging by what she said at her speech at the wedding she has clearly declared her intentions.

2: Second Verse
I won't need to wait for a passport like some,
Prince Charles just whispered a word to his mum
Who spoke to Theresa and they all did their bit,
They Windrushed me a passport so now I'm a Brit.


Meghan Markle's application was handled exactly like any other. The BBC did a report on the process the application process was begun in January 2017 - but never mind Jim never let details or the truth interfere with your attempt at humour.

3: Third Verse:
My wedding will cost just a few hundred grand
For horses, policemen and soldiers so grand.
And some of the public will get an invite,
But bring your own picnic for money is tight.


There have only been largely uniformed guestimates of what people think the wedding has cost - none of the costs guessed at have been confirmed by anyone. The major cost centres around security and ignores the fact that all the police and armed forces personnel present would all have been paid whether they were in Windsor or not. The traditional costs for a wedding were met by Prince Charles (Meghan Markle apparently bought her own dress). All 1,200 guests invited to view the wedding from inside the lower ward of Windsor Castle were given a "goodie bag" with a drink and something to eat - some are currently on sale on e-bay for £1,000 according to today's newspapers. Of the figures being bandied about wedding cost £32 million income over £100 million.

4: Fourth Verse:
No tax on our bedrooms, you've paid for our rent,
No mortgage or gas bills, not even a cent.
And soon there'll be babies, one, two maybe three.
I won't have to worry for EVERYTHING'S FREE!


This may come as a great shock to you Jim but, oddly enough, the vast majority of people in the UK do not pay tax on their bedrooms (IIRC you have to be in receipt of housing benefit before that applies). No taxpayer pays a penny for any property either owned by the Royal family, or the Crown Estate. As the entire Royal Family pay tax I dare say they also pay their household bills and everything is as free for them as it is for any other citizen. The total expenses incurred by the entire Royal Family are paid for from the incomes from The Crown Estate, the Duchy of Lancaster and the Duchy of Cornwall (Very transparent, reported annually and fully audited - look them up). Once all those expenses have been met the profits from the Crown Estate, the Duchy of Lancaster and the Duchy of Cornwall are fully taxed and contribute hundreds of millions to the Treasury each year.

5: For Scotland will be a Republic by then."

Dream on - if the SNP went for a second Independence Referendum today, they would suffer a greater defeat than they did in 2014. So far the SNP have failed Scotland miserably a fact that has not escaped the notice of the electorate of Scotland. On Brexit here is an example of the SNP idiocy: Scotland's trade with the rest of the UK is worth just over £50bn, Scotland's trade with the EU is worth £12.4bn - Guess which one the SNP feel is more important to Scotland? You got it the SNP opt for trade with the EU as being more important.

All the above easily checked.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Observer
Date: 23 May 18 - 03:44 AM

RE: Point 3 in my last post.

According to Jim McLean's whinge.

And some of the public will get an invite,
But bring your own picnic for money is tight.


The truth of the matter:

" All 1,200 guests invited to view the wedding from inside the lower ward of Windsor Castle were given a "goodie bag" with a drink and something to eat - some are currently on sale on e-bay for £1,000 according to today's newspapers."

Yertis:

Goodie Bag Sale

Not bad eh Jim? Front row seats for a view of the arrivals plus a £21,400 bonus on top - care to write a verse about that?


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 23 May 18 - 04:20 AM

Dear GUEST:Observer, I think in this age of food banks, rough sleepers, homeless society it was a breath of fresh air to spend £30 million on a royal wedding between a couple of millionaires. I reckon the royal family, including Prince Charles, paid for some of it with their own money and I'm glad we gave them that money in the first place.
I suggest you write your own song in praise of that dysfunctional, extremely wealthy family supported by us who "let them eat goody bags" is seen as a magnanimous gesture.
The lies told by the Unionists in the last Scottish Indy referendum have been exposed. "Stay in the Union and we'll keep you in the EU" (?) and as far as Brexit goes Theresa May and her supporters argue that Scotland voted to stay in the UK and that vote should be respected. Scotland also voted to remain in the EU but that vote can be ignored. We shall be independent and my wish is to be a republic also.
I await your song (or ditty).


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Observer
Date: 23 May 18 - 05:58 AM

Jim, why you persist in the lies and total misrepresentations I have not got the foggiest clue. Do you rely on such to provide the rather shaky base for your nationalist republicanism?

1. Please tell me when, there were no food banks (In one form or another), no rough sleepers, no homeless. Now what the Royal Family does for charities both domestic and international is well known and recognised, through their patronage they help raise hundreds of millions each year - what do you do Jim?

2. Please tell us all where it is confirmed that the wedding cost £30 million? In my post I went to great length to state that all figures reported were unconfirmed guestimates. As I also stated in building that guestimate the cost of the police and armed forces presence was included - those costs would have to have been paid irrespective of what was going on that week-end, so they are false costs.

3. Please tell us what money you, or any other tax-payer, gives to the Royal Family? Where the money comes from that pays for them is clearly stated in Hansard and in the audited accounts of The Crown Estate, The Duchy of Lancaster and The Duchy of Cornwall. Before members of the Royal Family pay their income tax the profit generated by those three property and asset management portfolio contributes hundreds of millions of pounds to the Exchequer - my guess is they all pay a great deal more in tax than you do Jim.

4. I do not think the Unionists did say Stay in the Union and we'll keep you in the EU, although I do note that you qualified that with a question mark. What the Unionists most definitely did point out to the Scottish electorate in the campaign before the Independence Referendum was the fact, backed up by both the President of the EU Commission and by the President of the EU, that if Scotland voted for independence it would find itself out of the EU, see the difference songsmith?. On the other-hand in the run up to the Independence Referendum, Alex Salmond lied to the Scottish electorate by persistently making the claim that Scotland would retain it's membership. With respect to any IndyRef2 I see the SNP no longer try to maintain or cling to this fallacy.

I feel no need to write songs about the Royal Family, I see that you for some reason do, all based on falsehood and motivated by hatred, envy and spite.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Jim McLean
Date: 23 May 18 - 06:47 AM

So, GUEST: Onserver, I still await your ditty defending the Royal family. I couldn't disagree more with you and have made my position clear. The facts are simple: a disfunctional wealthy family living off the backs of taxpayers, only there because of history rather than personal endeavour. Totally undemocratic where the unelected head of state is praised for keeping her mouth shut.
This is the song thread section so move your complaints to the section below or write me a song.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: Johnny J
Date: 23 May 18 - 07:33 AM

Jim and everyone else is entitled to write a song even if some of us don't agree with its sentiments.

Also, we are all entitled to comment and disagree where we see fit. Whether or not this should be above or below "the line" here, I don't know? We're discussing a song though and it's sometimes difficult to separate everything between here and "General Discussions".

My view re the Royal Family, for what it's worth, is that a majority of people seem to want to retain The Monarchy and are obviously content to pay a proportion of their taxes towards this end. Many of them may be less happy with having to contribute to many other things including even things such as welfare, health, etc which we here would also consider to be very important. However, we live in a democracy and can make our views known in the ballot box providing that politicians give a lead. None of the major parties have been prepared to stand on a Republican "ticket" so far. They realise that such a move wouldn't get a lot of support.

As for who is paying for what, The Royal Family already have their own money and wealth. How they acquired it in the first place, of course, is also a contentious issue. However, what we pay for today is in terms of remuneration and expenses for duties they may perform and their security etc which is not the same thing as "keeping them" which is often implied. A subtle difference.


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Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Royal wedding (McLean)
From: GUEST,Observer
Date: 23 May 18 - 07:39 AM

Of course you disagree with me Mr. McLean - you deal in lies and misrepresentation, I prefer the truth and the real world

From the thread below the line:

Subject: RE: BS: The Royal Wedding
From: Howard Jones
Date: 23 May 18 - 04:50 AM

The £30m figure is pure speculation, and includes the private costs which were paid by the Royal Family from their personal funds. The taxpayer paid only for security - the costs have not been published but for William and Kate's wedding were £6.35m BBC News   This is roughly the same as what it costs the Met to police football matches in London (they were able to recover only 5% of the costs) over which no one bats an eye.

The Sovereign Grant is paid for out of the profits of the Crown Estate, which in 2016/17 yielded £328.8m to the Treasury. In the same year the Sovereign Grant was £42.8m. It is due to nearly double, but that is due to the exceptional costs of carrying out essential repair work to Buckingham Palace (which belongs to the state, not to the Queen, and the work would need doing whether it is to house the head of state or turned into a hostel for the homeless). There are additional security costs in addition to the Sovereign Grant of around £100m but the total costs are still less than the overall return from the Crown Estate.

My point is that this costs the ordinary taxpayer nothing, and there is more than enough surplus from the Crown Estate income to cover the occasional exceptional cost of something like a royal wedding. That's without the tourist income the royal family attracts, estimated at around £550m. There may be very good reasons for preferring something different over a monarchy, but the cost should not be one of them.


So Jim your - The facts are simple: a disfunctional wealthy family living off the backs of taxpayers, only there because of history rather than personal endeavour. - Is a total falsehood:

They do not live off the backs of taxpayers (they are taxpayers themselves, who pay a great deal more in tax than you do Jim)

They are there as Head of State by invitation of the sovereign Parliament of the United Kingdom and have been since the accession to the throne by King George I in 1714.

Best not talk about "facts" Jim until you find out what a fact is.


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Mudcat time: 23 May 9:31 AM EDT

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