ADD: Liarty - cosmotheka song

Subject: Lyr Req: Liarty - cosmotheka song
From: GUEST,MrCharles
Date: 26 Jul 18 - 06:08 PM

Earlier this year I was given by my godfather a couple of cosmotheka albums on cassette. One of the songs on one these cassettes was entitled Liarty. Now, a quick google search has revealed nothing about this song, but I would love to have the lyrics written down to learn. Can anyone help?

Subject: ADD: Liarty - cosmotheka song
From: GUEST,Bob the Shantyman
Date: 15 Feb 24 - 02:38 PM

LIARTY

The other night, dressed in my best, a trilby hat and fancy vest,
I took a stroll around the West, a gypsy girl I chanced to see.
Outside a boozer in The Strand, her hair a mess, she couldn’t stand.
I helped her up, she moved my hand, I said “I’ll take you home to tea”
She said “You are a Liarty, it’s half-past-ten and much too late for tea!”,
It’s supper time, and by the look of you, I’m in for mutton chop and baked potatoes too.

My missus said she’s like to go to spend a nice quiet week or so
With her Mam-ma in Felixstowe, “Most certainly” I said to Jane.
I packed her boxes up at once, I called a cab – I’m not a dunce,
I told her she could stop for months and as I locked her on the train,
I said “Goodbye-i-tee!” and as soon as she was out of sight you see,
I went and had a cup of tea with the woman round a number thirty-three.

I went and bought, one summer’s day, a pair of trousers, what a jay.
I put ‘em on and strange to say they fitted me like a balloon.
I do a turn on the Music Hall - I don’t sing quiet, I shout and bawl..
I bought ‘em for the stage, that’s all those pantaloons I bought in June
I sent ‘em to the laund-ery but when they came back they were too tight for me.
They shrank a bit, but hold your row, instead of baritone I sing soprano now.

I had an idea in my brain, to go and build an aeroplane.
I bought some old iron down the lane, and pinched a lot of other things
A pair of props from Mrs. Green, I stuck a sheet on in-between,
A small machine, some para-feen and then I went and spread my wings.
I tried to fly–i- tee and I stated off from Peckham Rye-i-tee.
I tumbled down upon St. Paul’s - with the steeple sticking up my overalls.

Subject: RE: ADD: Liarty - cosmotheka song
From: Long Firm Freddie
Date: 16 Feb 24 - 05:27 AM

Great job, Bob.

Here's a transcription of an original recording by Harry Champion:

LIARTY

The other night, dressed in my best, a trilby hat and fancy vest,
I took a stroll all round the West, a lady there gave me the wink.
Outside a bun shop in The Strand, her bun undone, she couldn’t stand.
I murmured as I took her hand I said “I thought you said you didn’t drink”
“You are a Liarty, you’ve not been drinking cups of Lyon’s tea!”,
“You’ve had a lot of diddly, so you needn’t come and try and diddle me.”

My missus said she’d like to go to spend a nice quiet week or so
With her Mam-ma in Felixstowe, “Oh certainly” I said to Jane.
I packed her boxes up at once, I called a cab – I’m not a dunce,
I told her she could stop for months and as I locked her in the train,
I said “Goodbye-i-tee!” then as soon as she was out of sight you see,
I went and had a cup of tea with the woman round at number thirty-three.

I went and bought, one summer’s day, a pair of trousers, what a jay.
I put ‘em on but strange to say they fitted me like a balloon.
They must have caught me with their tricks, they only charged me one and six
Now they can have them back for nix, those pantaloons I bought in June
I wore ‘em in July-i-tee when the rain was dropping from the sky-i-tee.
They’ve shrunk a bit, but hold your row, they’re a pair of Tommy’s knickerbockers now.

I had an idea in me brain, to make meself an aeroplane.
I bought some old iron down the lane, and pinched a lot of other things
A pair of props from Mrs. Green, I stuck a sheet on in-between,
A small machine, and para-feen then orf I went and spread me wings.
I tried to fly–i-tee and I started off from Peckham Rye-i-tee.
I tumbled down upon St. Paul’s - with the steeple sticking in my overalls.
I tumbled down St Paul’s, teapot sticking in me overalls!

LFF