Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Peter T.
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 08:55 PM

This place is still just so 20th century. On yer bikes!!!21st Century Tavern Presents....

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 08:19 PM

...AAAWWWWWW...she says joining in the chorus of "Poor Baby's" coming from the bar....Put your rum on Bert's tab then, iffin you want to be spiky about it. Don't blame me for your predicament. I tried to talk them into filling the wash sink for you. Even had little plastic boats and bubble bath that smelled of rye. Alice wouldn't hear any of it. I think she likes the effects that a blast of cold water will have on a gent...That's all right. If you feel the need to pout some more, you can have a syringe free spot by the fire, and a warm blanket you can curl up under and give us all the look of death. Okay? Elle

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 08:06 PM

Nope! it wont fade by morning and it will take a bloody lot more than a pint to make the memory of that brush go away. You guys are really cruel, even me floggings did'nt hurt that much. Elle don't you dare come near me with that syringe again! It's not a vet I need, just more rum (actually after last night a cocoa and early to bed) Yours, (little Goodnight whine) Aye. Dave!!!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 07:35 PM

Caitrin dear, a pint to wrap my wee warm mitts around please. You're a damn sight easier on the eyes than the last barkeep.

Has BlackJack been drawing on the walls of the men's room again? No wonder Cleigh spends so much time in there...art appreciation, and a chance to look at normal toilet seats, I'm sure.

Aye Sparkly Dave, looks like you got the business end of a scrub brush whether you liked it or not. Scent of Pussers Rum again? No fear, have a pint on Bert and it will all be just a faded memory by morning.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Peter T.
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 06:18 PM

Dat ain't no pencil-din mustache, LEJ mon camarade, dat a smudge from de charcoal from de explose of de artistic Montmartre Can Can flooze exciteness due to de painting of de bonbon Mme. annap O naturelle, along de lines of along de lines. 'Ow I got to be O naturelle (blood type more maple syrup, you bet, honhon) can't bring into de 'ead. But de art is long, you bet. Yours, BlackJack Shellac.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 02:59 PM

Raining again Alice me love? why do I need a shower? I had one last month. How do yer spronounce B.A.T.H.? All hands to the pumps, these women are going to scrub me down mates; even though I told then about my shower last month. Strange creatures these women, always dhobeying and warshin things. Don't they know it's bad fer yer skin? Like it or not here I go. Hey watch out for that hose pressure Mbo I ain't on fire you know...Brrrrrrrrg cold and fresh! hey you know, this reminds me of the storm last week. Easy with that yard brush mates the bristles are a bit sharp..... Okay? can I go back in now ladies? I got me aftershave (pussers rum) on? You know I don't smell as bad as that damn Possum Cleigh.... Yours, (drippin wet)Aye. Dave

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Alice
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 02:38 PM

Dave (the ancient mariner), the shower is right this way... just follow me... it's very "refreshing".

alice

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 02:26 PM

Crawling back into the tavern, sluggishly climbing up to the bar. Barkeep another rum and Bushmills pleeeeeese and pass me that bastard dog that bit me last night,I'm gonna bite him back...Arrrgh.. hair of the dog? anymore of that Rover and ye'll be skinned laddie.....If I start singing I am the monarch of the sea, just throw me outside again mates. Yours,(alive,just)Aye Dave

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 09 Jan 00 - 12:06 PM

Hey, let's have a toast to the ECU Pirates! WHOO! Beat William & Mary (Black Billy Grimes & his Old Lady) into the ground. The general atmosphere is going to be great when I go back tomorrow! And for Dave, lets "Pour, oh pour the Pirate sherry, fill, oh fill the Pirate glass, and to make us more than merrier, let the pirate bumper pass!"

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 08 Jan 00 - 02:18 PM

Yeah Caitrin, I know all about those arches & domes, barrel vaults, groin vaults etc...Sorry, I don't know about high school, I didn't go. I dropped out of school at the end of first grade, and was home-schooled until it was time to take the GED when I was seventeen, and started college a few months later. Home-schooling--the greatest thing to happen in my life--if I hadn't been, I would have been a seriously different person. AND DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE SOCIAL PROBLEMS, HUH?!!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 07 Jan 00 - 11:32 PM

Sure, Caitrin. Tie this apron on, put on this coonskin cap and get some comfortable shoes. Here's a list of everyone's favorite drinks, and a recipe for Guinness Jello. Catspaw and the possum usually sit at the end of the bar under the Budweiser Clydesdale scale model. There are three barefoot idiot friends of his that come in from time to time, put their drinks on his tab. Keep the possum out of the peanuts. There's more beer downstairs, but Banjer falls asleep on the hatch-door about 11 PM, so get all your goods up before that. If you try to move him he yells "I'm right behind ye Colonel Pickett!" and will nail anybody in range with his rusty saber. A dark-haired kid will come in and act like he owns the place- don't card him. It's Max. Sometimes he crashes on the cot in the office. Oh, and this is Bert's tab, now standing at $4,337. VISA's phone number is at the top, if you need to get his credit limit raised. Don't mess with the guys in the corner booth- can't explain right now, but they're the ghosts of some departed beatnicks. Neil Lowe usually keeps them corralled. The strange guy that looks like Falstaff is MMario- he's always here, so you can leave him on the stool when you lock up. A Huge Red-headed loud guy will burst in on a fairly regular basis. That's Big Mick and he looks like a trouble-maker but he's not. Oh, and if "Koko" calls, he's not here. The guy with the pencil-thin moustache and beret doing a charcoal of annap by candle-light is Peter T. Don't ask him about his acting career unless you've got all night.If "Aye Dave" asks, yes it's alright if he leaves his harpoon in the kitchen while he goes to the bordello down the street. Tall skinny guy named seed, keep on eye on him- always getting loaded and getting up on stage with the band. Oh, and it's OK for the distinguished gray-haired guy to give massages to all the ladies. Name's Doug R and he's OK. If Wyowoman comes in, naked except for some bubblewrap, just make sure you hide the thumbtacks.

That's about it. BBC can help you with the rest. Good luck!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Caitrin
Date: 07 Jan 00 - 10:54 PM

Don't you remember high school, Mbo? one week before Christmas, one week after. We're lucky to get that much, with the way the calendar's been screwed up by all the time we were out because of flooding. And as for your art history class, here's the most important stuff about the Romans: concrete, arches, domes, and vaults. Assume everything is named after an emperor or Caesar.

LEJ, Can I be the apprentice bartender? I've always wanted to learn how, and now I'm actually old enough to! (In my state, at least.)

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 07 Jan 00 - 06:47 AM

Only Dirty People need to wash, aint no dirty people in here mate. Ten days without a bath? ha! not even time to change the linen yet. Yours, Aye. Dave

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Roger the skiffler
Date: 07 Jan 00 - 04:43 AM

Outta my way, give me a large 7-star. Just heard our friends Yorgos & Irini are letting out their flat above the taverna again and Yorgos has got a new acoustic guitar to replace the old beatup amplified acoustic he used to have. So add to Travellers Tips: places for music lovers to avoid this summer: Emborios on Kalymnos first week in July. First time we've ever returned to a Greek island. I've got a new passport so perhaps they won't notice. I'll take the old kazoo and a bunch of lyric sheets. If you see the goats throwing themselves off the mountain into the sea you'll know I'm at the seven Metaxa stage and switched from Puttin' on the Style to Blue Suede Shoes.
Must check in to the Neil Young Center to get some of the doc's calmin' down medicine
RtS

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Susan A-R
Date: 06 Jan 00 - 10:04 PM

The majority of us have bathed regularly, but the noisesome minority always wins out. Now Mbo, that General Tso's chicken stuff is mighty tasty. Just don't tell all of my hard-core vegetarian customers I said so.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: bflat
Date: 06 Jan 00 - 09:57 PM

I saw the lighton in the Tavern and thought I poke my head in. From the looks of things, and the scent of the air some of you have been here for ten days, without a bath. So this is how it was maybe four milleniums ago. Beasts and babes all for me grog.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 06 Jan 00 - 08:43 PM

Man, Caitrin, there are barbarians up there! You're still in school? Do they ever give you breaks? ECU lets us have 3 1/2 weeks for Christmas vacation! Since I have to take Art History I next semester, I'll be learning about Roman art. My art history class last semester was supposed to be a general overview, but it was really centered towards more modern art--"Yes, ma'am, that's "Pauline Eleanoire du Brassac du Bearn, Princesse de Broglie" from 1853, by Jean-Auguste Dominique Ingres..." Good birthday choice. My family always has Chinese food on people's birthdays. Mmmmm...I could really go for some General Tso's chicken right now...

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: TerriM
Date: 06 Jan 00 - 07:29 PM

Roger, I've always liked eau de metaxis.... and eau de vie come to think of it, although I draw the line at eau de Nile,Eygpt's too far to go for a drink. Cleetus,dear, don't do that. Because it will frighten the reindeer and make you go blind, that's why.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Caitrin
Date: 06 Jan 00 - 07:24 PM

Ah, the Tavern is back! Lovely old place, it is. Sorry I've been so absent...school has been keeping me rather busy lately. (Big research paper due in a week or two, big test on Roman art tomorrow). Also, yesterday was my birthday so I was out partying all night. (Actually, I just went to good ol' Szechwan Garden and had some Kang Pao chicken, but that's close enough, right?) Hope everyone is doing well.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Susan A-R
Date: 05 Jan 00 - 11:40 PM

Well, I'm glad to see we saw justice done, and got the beer safely here. Now I can stop tavern/schooner/livingroom hopping, and can just concentrate on the other two. No Reg, and I don't care which one you are, you may not have just a little keg of guinnes. THWACK! I said NO.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Roger the skiffler
Date: 05 Jan 00 - 05:38 AM

Wow, I go away for a few days and the Tavern gets busier than ever [no coincidence? Must be the wrong aftershave Eau de (Odour) Metaxas doesn't work, huh?]
Still refreshed from listening to the Gary Davis, Leon Redbone and Etta James CDs Santa brought me I'll fight my way to the bar for a small 3-star.
Traveller's tip for music lovers: Island to avoid next summer: Ikaria in early September! Must get a hard shell case for the kazoo!
RtS

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 31 Dec 99 - 01:08 AM

You bet your sweet arse under full sail! Ever faithful hound drags the sled all the way through drift and dale to find yon booze. And what do we find when we get there? Cletus, Paw, Reg, Reg, and Reg helping themselves to the lot. I heard tell in the bar that they were allowed to have the radiator, but no one said anything about the coolant!!! And YOU try telling "Angus the Faithful" that he can have no dregs of his lassies beer. Fearsome sight.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: katlaughing
Date: 31 Dec 99 - 01:00 AM

Well, not all the women went looking for the vile black stuff! It's too damn cold out there for the likes o'me! My roses would freeze right off! DougeR, come over here, darlin, an' I'll take ya up on yer offer....I am always ready for magic fingers.(laughing softly)

Mikal, you are a tall drink in a cold storm and a sight for sore eyes, BUT, PLEASE keep that vile haggis-shite away from me! If that's my highander ancestors' revenge then they can stay in their graves unknown, unsought by me, the family archivist! Ugh! No offense, ya ken?

DavetAM-Ayeman, glad to have you aboard, you'll hafta share some more of your Newfie stories with us. Some of those highlanders of mine wound up in Nova Scotia and still some distant relations are there to this day. "tis always good to hear of what it might've been like for them.

What's that I hear? Sounds like a pack of howling hounds, no, wait a minute.....more like a pack of howling men, yeah, I think they women are under full sail with iron skillets! DougeR, darling, I'll be right back, don't move your fingers, sweetie, okay?

Dancing across the floor in double time, she flings open the door and is bowled over by Cletus, Paw, Reg, Reg, and Reg, hands clapped over their heads, crying out that there are wild banshees on their tail, quick let them in!

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 31 Dec 99 - 12:21 AM

The women have gone to dig out the truck. Wow! What would this world be without women, I have to wonder for at least the fourth time today. Thanks for the bag o' gold Dave,Aye, the Ancient Mariner,Esq. Cool! These doubloons have little pictures of Wyowoman on them. You sure they're real? I found two of these jammed in the coin slot of the juke box yesterday.

Now we aren't entirely out of beer altogether. I found this moss-covered cask of something in the cellar under Banjer's hammock, and anybody who has the courage is welcome to step up to the plate and take a swing at it.

Oh,yeah. Two guys in trench coats were in here asking a lot of questions earlier. Anybody happen to know who stabbed George Harrison?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 31 Dec 99 - 12:08 AM

I'm with Susan. My faithful, albeit brainless, hound is strapped to the dogsled out front, what say we make a run? I won't be able to get back to sleep knowing there is Guiness freezing in a snowdrift somewheres. It should be in this tav, and have my wee warm mitts around it. I fear they'll be no rest 'til it's so.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mikal
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 10:49 PM

Bah! I'm down to rum again. What use is a pub without Guiness?

Next we will be pouring out Ripple or Rosie O'Grady! Pubman, have you anything resembling a stout or a porter in the place? And mind you, I have a bodrhan, an' I pretend to know how to use it!

(He reaches beneath his coat, and brings out a small bit of pewter wrapped in cloth tape.)

And if I don't get a good beer soon, I swear, I'll use my swazzle on ye!

Mikal

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Susan A-R
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 10:17 PM

So has Cleetus shown up with the beer yet? I would dearly love the black vile stuff, mysterious bubbles and all. Spaw, I certainly can harmonize on something for that nice Mbo. I could even play the dulcimer if it isn't hammered (I don't have the hand eye coordination for those beauties, but love the mountain variety.) Dougie's Until We Meet Again works well, and is a nice one, might even take the taste of haggis out of my mouth. I prefer mealy puddings any day. At least you can drown those suckers in butter.

What? still no beer? Maybe we should cast off our penguin suits and go out and deal with this situation. Alison, Wyo Woman, Kat, JenEllen, C'mon girls, let's go GET THE GOODS.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 10:01 PM

Again with the wishes, this time the drinks are on Dave. Mbo, the song is an old one a friend and I adapted. A little alcohol, a little fire, and it just flows. No fear of the Scots coming after you, you can borrow Dave's t-shirt and they'll not suspect a thing. Elle

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 08:07 PM

Here's a tab for the bar (hoisting a sack of gold pieces of eight and smacking it in front of the bartender) let me know when these run out; I've another bag I've been savin for a snowy day. "All Hands to the bar here, fer a drink to good cheer" 2000 and I'm on duty New Years Eve, this is my last drink till the 3rd Aye join me one and all in a Toast. May we progress in wisdom as much as we have in time and technology. Best Wishes to One and All, Yours, Aye. Dave (sober till next week) Hopefully:I will be awarded an "I Survived Y2K t-shirt" by the Queen, for my dedication to Sea Shanties)

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: DougR
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 07:38 PM

Susan A-R: Thanks for the kind words. An old codger like me appreciates the fact that his efforts are appreciated. Kat, I think it's about time you experienced these "magic fingers" again. It's been a spell. Meanwhile, to bolster my energy a bit an nice cold Vodka on the rocks, a teenie splash of water and a large green olive would suit me nicely if Bert's card will stand one more charge.

DougR

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 07:01 PM

WoW, that's great JenEllen! Did you write that? BTW do you want to be called JenEllen, or Jen, or Ellen? And a fine bountiful new year to you too! Did I pick up a bit of a Scottish accent?

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 06:47 PM

After Cleigh, have to wish Mbo, Emily, Victoria, Dave, Margo, Susan, Annap, Okie, and all a prosperous year. Oh yeah, and whoever's buyin' the next round. I'm climbing on the back of the couch to sing you a song...

I'm sittin' here rockin'/ In front of the fire/ Watchin' the flames as they dance/ Sippin' a glass full of old Rock'n'Rye/ Drinkin' a toast to the past

Here's to the people and places I've known/ Here's to the love and the pain that is gone/ Here's to the joy and the sadness I've seen/ Here's to the unfinshed dreams/ Here's to what memories mean/ Rock'n'Rye/ Sitting here rockin' with tears in my eyes

I'm sittin' here rockin' in front of the fire/ Thinkin' of things as they are/ And how all that I am is just pieces and parts/ Of the memories I've gathered so far

Here's to the goodness and kindness I've shown/ Here's to the people that I've treated wrong/ Here's to mistakes I wish I could change/ Here's to the pride and the shame/ And the growin' that comes with the pain/ Rock'n'Rye/ Sittin' here rockin with tears in my eyes

I'm still sittin' here rockin'/ In front of the fire/ Thinkin' of things yet to be/ How the presents a doorway that leads from the past/ To a future that I've yet to see

So here's to the girl that I was in the past/ Here's to the girl that I am now at last/ Here's to the woman that someday will be/ Here's hopin' she's better than me/ Just because of these old memories/ Rock'n'Rye, Rock'n'Rye/ Sittin' here rockin' with tears in my eyes/ Sittin' here rockin' with tears in my eyes......

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 05:25 PM

John O'Dreams sounds lovely. Better than what Cleigh had to offer...someone needs to get the little guy some chapstick. Warm spot by the fire, here I come.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 05:18 PM

Sure...can I get some help in singing "John O' Dreams"? Did you know the melody that Bill Caddick & Tchaikovsky used is an old Southern Italian lullaby called "Piva Piva"? Hmmm...my great-great-grandmother might have sung this to her little ones before they took ship from Naples to America..."Home is the rover, her journey's over..."

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 05:03 PM

Barkeep..a brandy, no, no umbrella this time, afraid I'll put an eye out.

Stand aside now, must have a look at Mikal's stitches, professional curiosity. Ummmm, and all could have been avoided by singin' yer sainted ma something sweet and Burnsy? Oh well, it can't hurt having some scars to keep the lassies guessing. Your ears are warm, and your nose is cold and wet, I'm thinkin' you'll live.

Have to go find Cleigh and give him an early auld lang syne smoochie. I'm in no mood to stand in line later. Leftover possum is just as bad, if not worse, than gray quivering haggis.

Now to get my blanket back and get the layabouts off the couch. Anyone know anything to rock a lassie to sleep?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 04:11 PM

Sheepishly looking round the corner to the bar, Haggis and Chips mates? Athol Brose? well shiver me timbers I'm back munching on the goodies..........Yours, (with a deep manly Aye) Dave

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: MMario
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 02:30 PM

Mikal! Good to see you. Hope the holidays were filled with good memories for you. Put the haggis down o'er by the jello pit, the flamingos will probably polish it off.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 02:19 PM

HOOOOOOAAAAH! Don't ever do that again, 'Spaw. Ye tryin' tae kill me, man? I feel sad for George Harrison--let's sing one of his songs. Does anyone else know "If Not For You?" Bob Dylan wrote it. Anyone got a harmonica. BTW nice to see you back, Mikal!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: TerriM
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 02:00 PM

Somewhere about my person I have a hip flask of atholl brose which should go nicely with left over haggis ( yum, my favourite!) Dave, come back, no-one minds a good sob in a sing around, it shows the songs are working! By the bye, who's gonna rescue the booze AFTER Cleetus et al have rescued the booze?

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mikal
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 01:22 PM

(A weary looking man enters, brushing the snow from his black Stetson and shaking loose from his black leather duster. His right hand hovers over a bodrhan slung at his hip. His left hand holds a bulging gunny sack. His long hair is tied back to walk in the storm.)

So this is where you all go when I can't find you! Pubman! A Guiness, if you will, and a dram of Drambuie to carry the flag! It's been a rare holiday, boys. Haggis for twenty and the family game o' spoons. What, you don't know how to play? Well you shuffle two decks o' cards and give each fool at the table five. Then the dealer draws one and tries to make three of a kind. If the card is not the one he needs, he passes it left. First to make three o' a kind picks up a spoon. Of course there's one less mouth-shovel than players don'tcha know. In my clan we plays with knives…The stitches look right fine, don'tch think?

Anyway, We were tryin' to choke down th' haggis, (tall tumblers of single malt help!) when me dear sainted mother says, "sing fer us Mikal." An' bats those nearly lashless eyes at me. What is a poor man to do, eh? So I stand and deliver in good fashion, runnin' a fair beat on the old skin-box here. I whirl my way through "Mary's Wedding," and do a good turn on ""The Wren."

All this time I see that I have been singing', the family has been packin' away the haggis to beat the band! If I am a man o' even simple brains, I figure I need to sing a bit longer, and they will have eaten all mine too!

What? You've never had haggis, girl? Imagine the stomach of a sheep, stuffed with oats and all the parts of the animal no human and few dogs would eat! Boil it in the stomach for an hour or so, and serve it grey and quivering on a platter with whiskey to drink. It's Scotland's revenge on all of us who came here instead of staying home in the highlands where we should have.

Anyway, I think I have it made! I decide one more song and I will not have to eat this stuff for a whole 'nother year. Then bang! I did it. What should come out of my mouth but "Some friends an' I in a public house, were playin' dominoes last night…" (Sorry, didn't mean to make you all run fer cover like that…I won't sing it, I promise!)

You guessed it; Knives went flyin'. Th' game o' spoons was delayed until all the sharps could be re-assembled and the bleeding could be staunched. An' to top it off, I had to take all the leftover haggis. It's in the gunny sack there, if you've a stout stomach…

Pubman! A liter of Guiness this time. I've a wish to sing. Anyone here know the fiddle part to "Colonial Boy???"

Mikal

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: MMario
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 11:14 AM

Bert. Who else? That's why he knew first.

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: catspaw49
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 11:02 AM

So when you see the Space Station....think BEER!!! Who pays for this?

Spaw

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Bert
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 10:52 AM

Breaking news about the Black Vile Stuff

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Dave (the ancient mariner)
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 10:37 AM

(Sound of C-130 and Labrador helo's in background )Avast heaving, Belay there, make room, I just tasked the Search and Rescue Squadrons to rescue the boose. Now the bad news there might not be enough cargo left by the time my boys get it to the Tavern. Order some more boys just in case! Join in the fun, but watch them songs boys; the Lads and Lasses here are civilized, so mind yer tongues mates. I'll be responsible for their safety too! so mind ye behave. ( Dave going off to get the makings (cat of nine tails) just in case) Lonesome EJ don't hesitate to call if anyone else gets stuck out there with boose in the back. (Dave looking for a bottle of Black Bush) Yours, Aye. Dave

Sad Song For Mbo.

She's like a swallow that fly's so high, she's like a river that never runs dry, she's like the sunshine on the lee shore, My Love My Love, but love is no more.

Twas down in the garden this fair maid did go, plucking the beautifull primerose, and the more she plucked the more she did pull, until she had here apron full.

Then of these flowers she made a bed, a stoney pillow laid at her head, and she lay down not a word did she spake. until this fair maids heart did break..........................

Sob, Sob, sorry mates, this one always breaks me heart when I sings it Dave Boo Hooing running away embarrased (ruined image of tough guy, disgraced hairy arsed sailor)

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: catspaw49
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 02:01 AM

uh Leej.....I just passed the tanker and I think the Skiff will be OK..........I left Cletus, Paw, Buford, and the Reg boys down there to help out........they have weak minds, but strong backs and the Skiffler can handle them...He's done it a lot at the Neil Young Center for the Terminally Screwed.....gawd knows they been there enough...............yeah, I know, but if they get the truck here do you REALLY care if they steal the radiator to make Shine?........So Meebo..tough day huh......Leej, give this boy a mason jar of that Rockcastle stuff....and,uh, gimmee one too.........Thanks...Don't worry about it, I'll watch him..........Here ya' go Meebo, some crystal clear good for what ails ya'.....OOOOOOO MAMA...so smmooooootthhh..........whaddaya think Meebo?......uh Meebo?.........Where'd the boy..oh, I see......Hey SusAR, you're experienced at this, gimmee a hand gettin' Meebo off the floor here will ya'?..........Thanks.......You OK man?.......This ain't that pissant Irish stuff.....ya just SIP it and let it flow........Here, take a sip.....See?..........just keep sippin' and relax here with me and SusAR......She and I will do a little "Dear Companion"....do it with this here dulcimer too.........You just relax and keep sippin' and tomorrow gonna' look a whole lot different.......................one way or another...............Do some harmony with me Suze..................

Spaw

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 01:33 AM

Guiness in trouble? Sweet mother of mercy, sign me up! I'll have to get out of this penguin suit long enough to toddle off to the loo for a sec, but I'll be back. Dave! Wake up man! What a doll, not even so much as a puddle of drool on my shoulder...I'd hate to have to prop him up on the possum for any given length of time. I don't know any Corrs I'm afraid, but I'd be willing to balance a bowl of peanuts on my head and sing Flower of Scotland if it would make you feel better. Gotta go find my mucklucks. Elle

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 30 Dec 99 - 12:35 AM

"OH, the weather outside is frightful..."

Sorry phoaks, I know it's cozy in here, but I need every able-bodied man, woman, and possum to yank on their mucklucks and give me a hand. Roger the Skiffler just radioed to say he was stuck in a snow drift with a semi-load of Guinness, Bushmill's, Carlsberg and other assorted Y2K essentials, about 200 yards down the road. But before we go out on this errand of mercy, line up at the bar for your choice of cognac, scotch, bourbon or peppermint schnapps. We'll kindle a little fire in your hearts that'll last til we dig the Skiff out of his predicament.

"...but the fire is so de-lightful"

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Mbo
Date: 29 Dec 99 - 09:50 PM

*SIGH* I feel lowzy. I've been kicked a bit on the Mudcat today. Nothing I say seems to be right. Oh well. Can someone sing me a sad song? I'm feeling in the mood for something depressing. Does anyone know "Closer" by The Corrs? I think I'll just sit in the corner over there...

--Mbo

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: Susan A-R
Date: 29 Dec 99 - 09:38 PM

Keeping 'em guessing isn't half of it JenEllen. With this luxurious robe, you are never sure how many people are inside. Neat trick that.

I believe I'll have a nice stout and warm up on a few shanties so that I can sing Come By the Hills in the sweet style it requires. NO Cleigh, you may not have a sip. Spaw has cut you off, and I quite agree. Besides, I now have a clay bear whistle of me own, and a bear outweighs a possum any day, so mind your manners.

Thanks much for the massage DougR. No one who gives back/foot rubs like that is harmless. Mostly harmless perhaps, but . . .

Subject: RE: Mudcat Tavern (Some Number, Who Knows?)
From: JenEllen
Date: 29 Dec 99 - 09:06 PM

More covert operations???? Be still my mischevious lil heart! Well....you DID shave, it's the least I could do to let you whisper in my ear. And don't worry about getting kicked out of the tavern, if they let a possum in, chances are they'll forgive even you. Elle