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BS: the roadkill thread

keberoxu 05 May 19 - 05:23 PM
Jeri 05 May 19 - 06:11 PM
Joe Offer 05 May 19 - 07:48 PM
Sandra in Sydney 06 May 19 - 12:36 AM
Steve Shaw 06 May 19 - 06:53 AM
Donuel 06 May 19 - 07:01 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 06 May 19 - 05:43 PM
keberoxu 06 May 19 - 06:50 PM
keberoxu 07 May 19 - 04:59 PM
Joe_F 07 May 19 - 08:42 PM
keberoxu 07 May 19 - 08:49 PM
keberoxu 08 May 19 - 07:29 PM
keberoxu 12 May 19 - 04:20 PM
keberoxu 13 May 19 - 03:01 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 13 May 19 - 04:01 PM
Stilly River Sage 13 May 19 - 05:38 PM
keberoxu 13 May 19 - 05:45 PM
vectis 14 May 19 - 10:34 PM
Rob Naylor 15 May 19 - 05:21 AM
Donuel 17 May 19 - 05:44 PM
robomatic 17 May 19 - 06:50 PM
keberoxu 20 May 19 - 06:28 PM
Mrrzy 20 May 19 - 07:55 PM
Mrrzy 20 May 19 - 07:58 PM
Stilly River Sage 21 May 19 - 12:17 AM

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Subject: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 05 May 19 - 05:23 PM

'Tis the season, fellow Mudcatters,
when spring fever moves in man and beast,
and some critters,
like squirrels,
have got their minds on, ahem, other things
when they should be looking both ways before they cross the road.


The newly dispatched grey squirrel,
which I just drove past on the side street,
lay on one side,
and one hind leg stiffly stuck forward and out
for one more scramble ...


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Jeri
Date: 05 May 19 - 06:11 PM

I wrote this last year in the midst of all the carnage on one particular section of road. Guess the tune.

The Fur-Lined Highway

I've been drivin' these streets so long
Now there's a different song
Here, it is rural, these ain't the streets of Broadway
But hustle's still the name of the game
And slow guys get flattened to soak up the snow and the rain
There was a load of oaks and acorns
Now you're sacrificin' each first-born
And I gotta go where all the little corpses be

On the fur-lined highway
Driving in my car, it's a squirrel-spangled rodeo
On the fur-lined highway
It's a dangerous game - do they even know?
And there's another diving under my wheels

Well, I shouldn't mind the bumps
Cuz you can only kill 'em once
But I cringe goin' over the lumps
That used to be tree rats
And I dream of winter's breath
When the snow covers up the sad evidence of death
There'll be a load of oak trees growin'
In the place where they are goin'
But I'm gonna be where the lights are shinin' on me

On the fur-lined highway
Driving in my car, it's a squirrel-spangled rodeo
On the fur-lined highway
It's a dangerous game - do they even know?
And there's another diving under my wheels


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Joe Offer
Date: 05 May 19 - 07:48 PM

And that, of course, brings back a thread from the early memories of Mudcat:

It also reminds me of my visit to the Catspaw Shrine in Bremen, Ohio. Bremen is far south in Ohio, in a land rich with small mammals. For miles around Bremen, the highways are covered with the carcasses of roadkill. They don't have deer and bears and mountain lions like we have here in the California Sierras, but Bremen has lots and lots of little critters, all over the road.

Brings back happy memories.

-Joe-


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 06 May 19 - 12:36 AM

& here in Australia we have kangaroos which travel by jumping, including into the road! Cars & trucks can kill them, but they can also kill & injure people in cars.

Wombats grow to about 40 inches long and can weigh between 44 and 77 pounds & are a species that walks straight ahead - whether onto roads, or thru garden fences etc.

As misguided settlers brought with them the game animals (rabbits, hares & foxes as well as other animals & birds) they were used to at Home (notice the capital letter, my parents generation & those before them referred to UK as Home)) they also contribute to roadkill - latest menace in the news are feral deer that can do as much damage to a car as a kangaroo!

I once annoyed my driver by counting the road kill.

There used to be a food supplier at Festivals using the name Roadkill Cafe - but they sold ordinary festival food.

So I googled the name & there is a real Roadkill cafe in Darwin!


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 06 May 19 - 06:53 AM

"Brings back happy memories."

???

Tasty, were they, Joe? :-)


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Donuel
Date: 06 May 19 - 07:01 AM

In Ohio we saw bear cubs roadkill. Unusual.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 May 19 - 05:43 PM

The road-killed animal I see most often is the greasy gray-furred pancake. Oddly, I've never seen a live specimen, only dead ones.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 06 May 19 - 06:50 PM

It was April or May -- more likely April -- decades ago,
when it was necessary to cross central Texas by car,
headed for eastern Oklahoma,
west to east.

And never in my life have I seen
more dead skunks in a shorter amount of time
and distributed across so great a distance.

The most noteworthy occasion of the drive
was when, after the sun went down,
a very much alive skunk positioned itself in the middle of the road
and waited for my car;
then when my car got close enough for me to see it,
the skunk rose slowly and with great emphasis,
seems like it was up on two legs actually in memory,
like it was daring me to run it over.

I drove around the little weirdo.

Whoever eventually must have run the skunk over,
it was not I who did it.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 07 May 19 - 04:59 PM

Sometime -- not now, though --
I must regale you all
with my account of
driving eastbound towards Austin, Texas,
and seeing my first *********
as roadkill,
never having seen a real live one
except in photographs.

It certainly got my attention.
(Then I saw a real live one further down the road.)


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Joe_F
Date: 07 May 19 - 08:42 PM

I heard, some years ago, a song about someone who made a sport of roadkilling, and eventually attempted a hippopotamus or something of the sort. I think it was called Flanimals, but Google yields something quite different under that name.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 07 May 19 - 08:49 PM

A biology professor has written
a tongue-in-cheek guide to North American roadkill
called Flattened Fauna,
which I recommend
for its description of
"Road Toads"    (I've never seen one.)


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 08 May 19 - 07:29 PM

And now, opossums on the road, for some strange reason. Dispatched, I mean.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 12 May 19 - 04:20 PM

In a class of its own:
roadkill in the RAIN.   
It's revolting.

Not the rain, that's not revolting in itself,
it's what the rain does to the roadkill …

if you've seen it,
you know what I mean.

And for those of you who haven't,
one thing that may be said is:
no,
the end result is not cleaner than it was --
not on a road with cars, trucks, motorbikes …   ugh.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 13 May 19 - 03:01 PM

how much wood
would a woodchuck chuck ... if ...

never mind.
Brought to mind by the latest roadkill.
Lovely fur pelt it had, too.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 May 19 - 04:01 PM

The only time I've seen a non-captive bald eagle (the national emblem of the USA) up close, it was feeding on a road-killed possum, behaving exactly like a common vulture/buzzard.

(The above is a statement of actual fact, not a political commentary.)


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 13 May 19 - 05:38 PM

The most magnificent roadkill-dining example I saw was in West Texas, when a huge golden eagle was perched on and tearing into a dead doe. I was heading west, the sun was low but not yet setting, and this was in silhouette as I crested the hill. Right beside I-10. I wish I'd gotten out the camera.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 13 May 19 - 05:45 PM

Donuel remembers Ohio for bear cub roadkill.

I remember Pennsylvania
(the turnpike and highways connecting to the turnpike,
so pretty much southern Pennsylvania)
for
fox kit roadkill.
Poor wee things.
So young were these red fox kits
that their pelts were more peachy-pink than orange.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: vectis
Date: 14 May 19 - 10:34 PM

Tone Def Leopard wrote a song about the Roadkill Cafe, maybe someone out there can remember the words.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Rob Naylor
Date: 15 May 19 - 05:21 AM

Vectis: Tone Deaf Leopard - Roadkill Cafe


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Donuel
Date: 17 May 19 - 05:44 PM

Recently I heard a Marvin Gaye song that was never released.
It was great and about elections.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: robomatic
Date: 17 May 19 - 06:50 PM

Somebody's moggie, by the side of the road...


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: keberoxu
Date: 20 May 19 - 06:28 PM

I, too, drove past someone's pet cat heaped against the curb
of a residential neighborhood, obviously killed.
A little tortoiseshell pussycat. Sigh.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Mrrzy
Date: 20 May 19 - 07:55 PM

Squirrels and people have a deal. I have never killed a squirrel since I found out about it *and* started sticking to it.

People: just keep your speed constant. Really- no matter what the squirrel is doing.

Squirrels: run back and forth like crazy and, if the car's speed has been constant, get out of the way at the last minute.

Apparently the forthing and backing is to give thair brains enough info on your velocity to get out of your way.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Mrrzy
Date: 20 May 19 - 07:58 PM

Get out- not get put. Oops.

I also learned there are 3 ages of roadkill: splat cats, fat cats and flat cats.


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Subject: RE: BS: the roadkill thread
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 May 19 - 12:17 AM

Mrrzy, since you made another remark I left both posts, but I repaired your typo. That's interesting about the back-and-forthness" thing that squirrels do. Do you happen to remember where you learned that? I'd love to see a documentary about how they figure out things like that.


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Mudcat time: 21 May 8:55 AM EDT

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