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MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

Rapparee 28 Jan 20 - 08:41 AM
Rapparee 27 Jan 20 - 02:25 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Jan 20 - 02:11 PM
Stilly River Sage 27 Jan 20 - 12:33 PM
Rapparee 27 Jan 20 - 12:04 PM
Donuel 27 Jan 20 - 09:47 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 27 Jan 20 - 09:07 AM
Donuel 27 Jan 20 - 08:12 AM
Rapparee 27 Jan 20 - 07:57 AM
Donuel 26 Jan 20 - 03:35 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 20 - 01:26 PM
Rapparee 26 Jan 20 - 09:17 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Jan 20 - 11:14 PM
Rapparee 25 Jan 20 - 10:25 PM
Donuel 25 Jan 20 - 04:39 PM
Stilly River Sage 25 Jan 20 - 02:48 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Jan 20 - 02:40 PM
gnu 25 Jan 20 - 05:28 AM
Donuel 25 Jan 20 - 02:25 AM
Donuel 25 Jan 20 - 02:08 AM
Rapparee 25 Jan 20 - 12:40 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jan 20 - 11:25 PM
Rapparee 24 Jan 20 - 08:26 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jan 20 - 02:27 PM
keberoxu 24 Jan 20 - 02:00 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 24 Jan 20 - 10:41 AM
Donuel 24 Jan 20 - 09:15 AM
Rapparee 24 Jan 20 - 09:04 AM
Donuel 24 Jan 20 - 06:30 AM
Stilly River Sage 23 Jan 20 - 04:00 PM
keberoxu 23 Jan 20 - 02:33 PM
Stilly River Sage 23 Jan 20 - 12:52 PM
Donuel 23 Jan 20 - 07:08 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Jan 20 - 11:51 PM
Stilly River Sage 22 Jan 20 - 11:12 PM
Rapparee 22 Jan 20 - 09:57 PM
Donuel 22 Jan 20 - 03:13 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 22 Jan 20 - 09:39 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Jan 20 - 09:34 PM
Donuel 21 Jan 20 - 09:34 PM
Rapparee 21 Jan 20 - 08:39 PM
Donuel 21 Jan 20 - 08:04 PM
Rapparee 21 Jan 20 - 07:23 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 21 Jan 20 - 07:04 PM
Stilly River Sage 21 Jan 20 - 04:43 PM
Donuel 21 Jan 20 - 03:02 PM
keberoxu 21 Jan 20 - 12:27 PM
Rapparee 21 Jan 20 - 07:58 AM
Donuel 21 Jan 20 - 07:16 AM
Bee-dubya-ell 20 Jan 20 - 09:20 PM
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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Jan 20 - 08:41 AM

MOM!

Guess what!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 02:25 PM

Lime was given to British sailors with rum to prevent scurvy.

Hey! I'm working on a presentation on knowledge transfer/information diffusion. Maybe I should check the rates of scurvy prevention in the British Navy as a model of the speed of information diffusion and its results. (Yes, really. April 21.)


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 02:11 PM

Remember that in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, "Belgium" is the ultimate off-color word on all planets save one. Earth is the only planet where the inhabitants are so clueless as to have named a country after a word the rest of the galaxy finds horribly offensive.

And as far as the lime thing goes, I suspect some genius decided that since lime is good in guacamole, it must be good in anything Mexican. Beer, salsa, Frida Khalo's underwear....


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 12:33 PM

Chocolate originated in Mexico so you SHOULD be thinking about Mexico when you drink Mexican beer. Just sayin'.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 12:04 PM

I've had chocolate-infused red wine -- it was pretty good.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 09:47 AM

I've seen small batch chocolate beer. Trouble is
like most animals taste like chicken, most beer tastes like beer.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 09:07 AM

Does the Belgian ownership of Budweiser mean that they'll eventually be trading in their Clydesdales for Belgian draft horses?


By the way, Tecate and Dos Equis are owned by Heineken, which is next door to Belgium in The Netherlands. Next time you drink a "Mexican" beer, try not to think of chocolate or tulips.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 08:12 AM

InBev?

And to think of all the schmucks who tried to corner the Silver market.
They should have tried to corner the beer market.

Belgium is not known for chocolate anymore. Now its International weapons sales and beer. What a mix


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Jan 20 - 07:57 AM

Anheuser-Busch InBev SA/NV, commonly known as AB InBev, is a Belgian-Brazilian multinational drink and brewing company based in Leuven, Belgium. AB InBev has a global functional management office in New York City, and regional headquarters in São Paulo, London, St. Louis, Mexico City, Bremen, Johannesburg and others. (Wikipedia)

Guess who owns/makes Corona AND Modelo beers! You get one guess.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Jan 20 - 03:35 PM

Nonethless Corona cases are ending up in deportation camps.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 20 - 01:26 PM

That event, I should mention, happened at the bar at the Legion Hovel.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Jan 20 - 09:17 AM

I'm aware of the lime slice. A beer was once served to me that way and the slice blocked getting the beer out. A guy next to me reached in to the get slice for his rum drink and got his fingers stuck in my beer bottle. Eventually an ambulance had to be called for him as others in the bar pitched in to help get his fingers out, but he did get the lime slice. Unfortunately, I never got to drink my beer and I never went back to that place. Citrus in beer! Humph!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 11:14 PM

I suppose this Corona virus will have a negative impact on sales of Corona beer. Normal people don't drink beer named after a plague.

Then again, normal people don't drink beer with a lime slice stuck down the bottle's neck either.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 10:25 PM

Oh no! I'm from Illinois AND I was there last November! I'm gonna die of too much Corona! I know it! I can feel death's ice fingers now! Dammit, I just knocked over my beer.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 04:39 PM

Florida man vs. Darwin Award winners
FL CLOSES IN ON THE DARWIN FOLKS

One man in Vero Beach, Florida, can claim to have such fiery devotion for the Dallas Cowboys, but for now he'll have to root on his favorite team while recovering from severe burns to his body. According to the Sebastian Daily, a 27-year-old man was rushed to the hospital after lighting himself ablaze after watching Sunday's Cowboys-Packers game. The incident reportedly came as a result of a lost bet after Aaron Rodgers led Green Bay down the field in a last-minute drive that gave the Packers a 35-31 win.At the hospital, deputies spoke with a couple who admitted they were watching the NFL game and agreed to burn the losing team's jersey. However, the man decided to wear the jersey as it was burning. A witness told Sebastian Daily, "He was set on fire after losing a bet on the Cowboys game … Skin was hanging off his arm and back." The man suffered third-degree burns on his right arm and right hand and second-degree burns to his back.

Such are the dangers of polyester in Florida. FL. hospitals are gearing up for the Super Bowl...


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 02:48 PM

Are there no hats or sweaters in Florida? Surely a few are there because of all of the relocated New Yorkers?

Programming Note: I've had as much as I can stand of politics for a while. I'm switching the radio to classical for the rest of the day. The way Pompeo treated Mary Louise Kelly yesterday pretty much did me in (and they're talking about it today and replaying the interview). I hope she landed a knee to the groin before she left the room. Now I'm off to play with the dogs and do some chores that have been calling out so long that it's now a loud chorus that needs to be muffled.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 02:40 PM

Florida Man Sets House on Fire to Keep Warm

By: Joe Kelley
Published: January 24, 2020 6:11 AM

There's a lot of flawed logic happening here.

A man in St. Petersburg, Florida was arrested Tuesday morning (January 21st) for setting a fire inside his apartment to stay warm.

Sixty-six-year-old Mark Okrent allegedly set fire to a stack of paperwork in his apartment around 3 a.m., and police report the flames were large enough to set off smoke detectors.

No one was injured, but Okrent has been charged with arson in the first degree.

Police also say he had several other options available to him that could've helped him get warm.


Please note that this particular specimen of Florida Man is of the Central Florida subspecies. Members of the Northern/Panhandle subspecies know what heaters are.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 05:28 AM

They have Prion Pudding at our City Hospital. Spicy.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 02:25 AM

FOR MOAB POSTERS ONLY


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 02:08 AM

Revenge of the Bushmeat by Claude Balls has soared to the top of the Best Yeller list. It is a wonderful treatise on the pros and cons of eating wild animals as well as pets. Claude treats the dangers and new flavors equally.
Many of the recipes use Panko instead of flour and it really makes a difference. Some of the desserts are quite exotic, like Prion Pudding.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Jan 20 - 12:40 AM

Prit near everthing tastes like chicken. Fella out here ate a cedar stump and said it tasted like chicken.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 11:25 PM

Burmese Pythons! Now, them's some good eatin'! Tastes sorta like a cross between iguana, feral pig, and chicken.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 08:26 PM

BURMESE PYTHON NUGGETS

INGREDIENTS

Python meat, ground or chopped finely

1 egg

1 cup milk

1/2 cup flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon minced garlic

1 tablespoon Tony Chachere's Creole Seasoning

1 teaspoon cayenne pepper


DIRECTIONS:

1. Beat the egg and milk together in a bowl.

2. In a separate bowl, combine the flour, salt, garlic, Tony Chachere's Creole Seasoning and cayenne pepper.

3. Dip the nuggets in the egg mixture, and then dredge in the flour mixture.

4. Deep fry at 375 degrees until crispy and golden brown.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 02:27 PM

That is good to know, Keb. Eating one's way out of an environmental disaster is always a good solution.

I'm just not sure the folks in South Florida understand the "Them's good eatin'!" thing quite as well as we Floribamians.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 02:00 PM

but, then, Bee dubya ell,
I read that Miami is big on Cubans cooking up the iguanas,
they have a Spanish word for the cooked meat
as opposed to the live critter ...
forget what it is though ...
and they can be sold in markets that way !


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 10:41 AM

The recent cold snap which sent the Miami area's temperatures down into the 40's was not in any way unprecedented. It happens every decade or so. But it was the first such cold snap since the Great Iguana Population Explosion.

No, iguanas are not native to Florida. Like Burmese pythons and lion fish, they're an invasive species, descendants of pets who either escaped or were released into the wild by their owners. When they began falling from trees last week, they should have been barbecued instead of rescued. What South Florida needs is a few good iguana recipes.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 09:15 AM

What of the retired Idaho librarian who is only capable of speaking in partial or complete book titles? This rare neurological condition does not effect his writing and of course is not a crime but reveals Idaho as a mystical land that harbors the bizzare well hidden from the world.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 09:04 AM

We in Idaho only deal with prosaic, and therefore ordinary, crimes. No axe murders for us! Sure, we have stagecoach holdups, claim jumpings, cache robberies, stacked and/or marked deck recriminations, back shootings, things involving 'very attractive ewes', opium smoking, horse theft, dry gulching, mine salting, passing bad money, stealing coal from the railroads, cattle rustling, mail theft, some bad Indian agents, and now and then a lynching, but who doesn't? None of these "love killings" for us! No sirree ma'am! We have the good old-fashioned crimes! OUR political bribes are done in the broad, open light of day! None of this skittering about like roaches when the lights come on for OUR politicians! They're as honest as old Caleb Lyons himself!


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Jan 20 - 06:30 AM

"In the winter of our discontent when a man unprincipled in private life, desperate in his fortune, bold in his temper, possessed of some talents, having the example of military nazi habits - despotic in his ordinary demeanor - known to have scoffed in private at the principles of liberty - when such a man is seen to mount the porn queen of popularity - to join in the cry of danger to liberty - to take every opportunity of embarrassing the General Government and bringing it under suspicion - when right doesn't matter to elected people - to flatter and fall in with all the nonsense of the zealots of the day - when no one in his party casts a profile of courage - it may justly be suspected that his object is to throw things into confusion and division that he may 'ride the storm and direct the whirlwind'"


When right does not matter and few care, we are lost as a nation of laws or families for freedom. Our last best hope is for mothers and women to rebel until the nation comes to its senses.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Jan 20 - 04:00 PM

I wonder if MOM would like to visit the first-ever museum of philosophy in Italy.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 23 Jan 20 - 02:33 PM

And now there are iguanas fainting in the cold
and dropping out of the trees in Florida.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Jan 20 - 12:52 PM

This may all be moot. The current adminstration has dropped a full twenty seconds off of the last two minutes for the Doomsday Clock.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Jan 20 - 07:08 AM

New York City man makes trillions of $'s from patent infringement lawsuits and fines. He claims that American inventions such as the light bulb and wheel are being misused globally so he is out there protecting America.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Jan 20 - 11:51 PM

Another episode in the adventures of Florida Man!


Florida Man Crashes Truck Into Bar to Steal Dr. Pepper

PANAMA CITY, Fla. — A Florida man was arrested after he crashed his vehicle into a bar to steal a Dr. Pepper, deputies told WMBB.

Gavin Lee, 28, is charged with armed burglary.

Bay County deputies were called to the Re-Rack Bar in Panama City on Friday morning after a reported burglary.

Lee attempted to get into the business even though it was closed, deputies said. When he couldn’t get in, he allegedly drove his truck through the front glass and went in.

Once inside the bar, Lee got a Dr. Pepper from the cooler, sat at a table in the bar and proceeded to enjoy the beverage, deputies said.

Deputies said Lee had a gun in his pocket during the burglary.



In contrast to the zany antics of Florida Man, Idaho Man seems to only commit serious crimes. Perhaps it's because we have more, better, and stronger drugs in Florida.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Jan 20 - 11:12 PM

This is readable on Instagram, but the friend who shared it has a private account, so I copied and pushed it to Flickr where you can barely make it out. If you're on Instagram and want to look for me to follow I can send it and you will read the most bizarre story you've seen for a while. (My name run together but three "r"s on the end instead of one.)


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Jan 20 - 09:57 PM

In Idaho a toesucker is a fish. Not a nice fish like a cutthroat, but a rather trashy fish that is an invasive species from Florida.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Jan 20 - 03:13 PM

Look at them toe suckers
ain't they neat
sittin there sucking them
big toe feet

Suckin them stinkers
suckin them good
suckin all ten
like you knew they would

How to be a toe sucker
ain't nuthin to it
jus open wide
rare back an do it


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 22 Jan 20 - 09:39 AM

Florida Man Breaks Into Home to Suck Toes

BRADENTON, Fla. (WPMI) - According to the Bradenton Herald , a 20-year-old victim was awakened by a man sucking on his toes around 3:30 a.m. on Christmas Eve.

The Manatee County Sheriff’s Office say a toe-sucking burglar broke into a Bradenton home on Christmas Eve.

Deputies who responded to the residence were told that the victim was sleeping in his bedroom when he was awakened by the suspect sucking on his toes, according to an incident report.

The victim asked the suspect what he was doing and the suspect stated he was "there to suck toes,” according to the report.

Deputies say a fight erupted and the suspect attempted to grab the victim's genitals and then threatened the victim, saying he had a gun.

According to the report, the victim never saw a gun, and managed to force the suspect out of the home. The suspect then smashed out a window to the home and then smashed the victim’s car windshield.

Deputies attempted to track the suspect with a police dog but were unsuccessful. DNA swabs were taken from the victim’s toes, according to the report.




Boy, that Florida Man sure does get around, doesn't he?


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 09:34 PM

I dunno if freds is/are actually on that recording Rap posted the link to, but my old band, June Apple, comes in at about minute 25 for a two-tune medley.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 09:34 PM

Having never read Earthly literature or grammer rules I will study these rules closely;
"3) Freds have no distinct genders. The correct pronouns with which to refer to freds are hesheit (nominative case), himherit (oblique/objective case), and hishersits (possessive). However some freds look decidedly male or female to human perception."

It may even help communication with my cross dressing son.

( I've noticed it takes about 4,000 years for a popular language to lose all need for pronouns like the Chinese.)

hmmm? Can one be a hybrid freds and not know it? Also do freds have unusually long lifespans.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 08:39 PM

Mind you, freds are only part, a very small part, of that recording.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 08:04 PM

Yep my hive mind inlaws are part freds.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 07:23 PM

If you would know what freds sound like, play the recording here.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 07:04 PM

Okay, gang, let us review freds protocol from way back in Mom's early days:

1) The only time "freds" is capitalized is when it is the first word in a sentence. Otherwise, the "f" is always lower case.

2) Freds is both plural and singular. There is no such thing as "a fred". That is because of freds' hive mind. You talkin' to one freds, you talking to all of 'em. However, that does not mean freds don't have individual characteristics. Some freds like to eat Mississippians, some like donuts. Some say Mississippians and donuts both taste like chicken so, fuck it, just eat chicken.

3) Freds have no distinct genders. The correct pronouns with which to refer to freds are hesheit (nominative case), himherit (oblique/objective case), and hishersits (possessive). However some freds look decidedly male or female to human perception. Like this freds.

4) Individual freds often have human-sounding names, though the characteristics normally associated with those names when they are born by humans may not apply. For example, the freds in the photo above is named Bubba. And this freds' name is Winona Ryder.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 04:43 PM

Donuel scores a Perfect 10 for Ethelfred.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 03:02 PM

Also excluded is King Ethelfred the Unready.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 12:27 PM

I do hope that Fred the Scottish Gritter Lorry is exempt
from all this carrying on about [them].

After all, there's only one of Fred the Scottish Gritter Lorry.
You can see him at the snowplough/snowplow tracker website.
Fred is hard at work on the West Coast of Scotland
and he has got most of Ayrshire to himself,
because most of the other gritters
are busy with Glasgow, Edinburgh, Aberdeen, Inverness, and the like.
Where would the West of Scotland be, I ask you,
without Fred the Gritter?


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 07:58 AM

I see: deadheads are planters. Both'll take out the bottom of your boat. Or they could become sawyers. Rafts and steamboats make it a real river, unlike, say, the Portneuf (but it does have some good trout fishing in the colder headwaters).

My grandfather's still is still now, residing in the Quincy Museum (a far fairer venue than it ever had in its younger days). It works fine, but I am bound by an oath of silence as to how I know.


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Jan 20 - 07:16 AM

Prohibition was good for some like the Capones and Kennedys.
Old fashioned bootlegging and running the slots south of Chicago was Grandpa's solution to Prohibition. Thanks to Grandma who as a young prescient girl married a guy who up and ran away subsequently finding oil in Oklahoma, fortunatly shared some of it with Grandma. Between him and Frank the bootlegger she had time to prospect as a rock hound finding many rare fossils like the Eohippus and other gems.
Booze, silver dollars from the slots and oil were the sins of the family fortune.
That is why I relatively reject all three in my liftime.
But fossils are cool.

My wife's side of the family may have some fred hybrids which is a dillemma. -bad driving and all-


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Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Jan 20 - 09:20 PM

Moonshining is almost a dead vocation in much of the Southeast. In most states it's fairly easy to get a license and open a boutique distillery (the distilled spirits equivalent to a microbrewery). Old moonshiners grandchildren are making way more money selling peppermint vodka and the like to lawyers than grandpa ever did selling rotgut 'shine to farmers.

But Mom still prefers the 'shine.


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