MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Feb 20 - 09:00 PM

In the entire WORLD there are exactly THREE places named Michael: one is in Illinois, one in Austria, and one in Mozambique. There is no place named "Mike" save for an airport in Hungary. However, the present President seems enamored of "La Wall."

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Feb 20 - 09:19 PM

The "Wall" part of my surname (LaWall) is a Germanic spelling of the French "Valle", meaning valley. It has nothing to do with any wall.

My wife's name is Susan, which comes from the Persian word for lily. Therefore, her married name literally translates as Lily Of The Valley.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Feb 20 - 10:23 PM

I'm very, very glad to hear that. Please extend to your Lily Of The Valley my deepest sympathy and tell her that she has been nominated for the Medal of Honor.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 20 - 08:21 AM

My last name means, in Modern Dutch, "Goalie." Given that my first name translates from Hebrew as "Who Is Like God" my name means "Goalie Who Is Like God" or "God-like Goalie." (This is true, by the way. I found out the goalie part from a Dutch fella in Carcassone awhile back. We were told as children my surname meant "Keeper of the Sacred Places" which, if you're into soccer, fits.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 19 Feb 20 - 03:07 PM

I still don't know how one venerable Massachusetts coastal town
acquired the name of Braintree
(it was there maybe a century before the settlement called Quincy)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Feb 20 - 03:27 PM

I suppose having one's name translate as "Goalie" is preferable to having it mean "Wide Receiver".

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Feb 20 - 05:41 PM

Most of the people who lived in Candor NY felt insulted and moved away. There is a book about it that Rap might know.
Chaste NY has not existed for 80 years now.
Its last resident was a Shaker.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Feb 20 - 08:31 PM

It has been illustrated many times that Trump's self-declared height is a special brand of BS. He's 6'1" at most, when you see him standing beside Obama and others all in the same type of shoes. Perhaps his waist is what is 75 inches.

MOM, I'm home with a new knee. It smarts a bit, what with the bone saws and gluing chunks of titanium to the exposed ends. I'm only checking in briefly before I put the leg squeezer things on to keep the blood circulating.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Feb 20 - 09:49 PM

I know about THAT, Stilly! Both knees have titanium in them. Just don't drive with those pills in ya!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Feb 20 - 12:49 PM

Don't drive! - I'm having to be careful when I talk or type. Anesthesia seems to hit short-term memory. No driving for a while yet. I filled the tank and parked it for what will probably be a few weeks.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 20 Feb 20 - 12:56 PM

I have to be careful when I talk or type all the time without drugs.
Look forward to April.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Feb 20 - 03:36 PM

Hi, Mom!

I got some new bedroom slippers. They have memory foam insoles.

I'm hoping the memory foam will help me remember to take the slippers off and put outdoor shoes on before going outside.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 20 Feb 20 - 04:35 PM

elo mom, I started the partisan prescription of 'Mr. Rodgers little helpers'. They cause folks to exude extreme kindness and have a blissful resignation to bad news without worry.
Side effects are ulcers and stomach cancer but
what do you expect from swallowing the bile of the world without some reaction? They are opiate FREE but contains 90% heroin.

The sister drug to Mr Rodgers helpers is for Republicans and is just plain anerobic steroids and amphtamines.

YAWN

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Feb 20 - 03:47 PM

Oxycontin, Oxycontin, I know you of old, you've robbed my poor pockets of silver and gold. Well, not exactly YOU, but the reasons I know you and your friend hydrocodone. And your other family members, like amoxycillin and Zofran and T-3.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 22 Feb 20 - 03:19 PM

Right now it is my friend - I tried anti-inflammatory last night instead of oxy at bedtime (because of the swollen knee) and it was the worst most painful night's sleep in a long time. And it didn't help the swelling. I had to wait six hours before the next dose of painkiller. And I've slept much of the day. MOM hasn't had any problems with me, just nudges me occasionally and tells me to do my stretches.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Feb 20 - 09:43 PM

It ain't addictive if it helps and you WANT to stop taking it as soon as possible. Me, I don't like to take pills but I will if I need it. Later you might try T-3 or T-4 -- basically Tylenol with codeine, T-3 has less codeine that T-4.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Feb 20 - 08:21 PM

That's probably what we'll step down to next week. The bruises are spectacular and painful now. It's always something.

I really don't need the walker, what I use it for is a general sweeping motion in front of me to chase the dogs out from underfoot. "Plow the road" is the fighter jet term that I've seen in movies; this is the terrestrial version.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Feb 20 - 09:14 PM

A walker can help you get up from a chair or a couch (or a toilet).

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 01:13 AM

Have you given your walker a name? Mine is called Hoppy. I had to get him when I broke my ankle because I also broke my wrist and couldn't grip crutches. I had to Velcro my lower arm to Hoppy so I could hop around on one foot.

I understand that if I ever need his services again, it may involve shuffling instead of hopping, but that makes no difference. He'll always be Hoppy to me. I wouldn't want a walker called Shuffley anyway.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 07:23 AM

Cassidy is a good name for a walker. (Hop Along)
This week's Curb your Enthusiasm featured the walker.
Similar to old locomotives a good cow catcher mini plow is a great walker idea.

My wife named her cane but I haven't even named my four seater Corvette. If I do, maybe 4-Vett could work. 40 years ago I had a Z 2+2

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 07:34 AM

Forty years ago I was living in Ohio, eight minutes from Kent State University and 36 miles from work. Ever drive 36 miles in an honest-to-God blizzard? I have, several times, and you don't sing "Jingle Bells" when the weather outside IS frightful.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 09:31 AM

We sing Slip sliden away. When we would see several Volvos in a blizzard leave the road and disappear down an embankment, we slow down.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 01:11 PM

Cars tend to follow the one in front of them in whiteouts and heavy fog; I had a friend who had a long driveway off of a state highway, and one evening he pulled in and had to tell all of the cars that followed him home to turn around and head back.

My driveway is too short for people to confuse it with a regular road but occasionally it could act as a boat launch when the creek rises.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 01:21 PM

LOL!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: gnu
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 04:33 PM

Ditto Donuel!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Feb 20 - 10:25 PM

Funny. Many times I've seen boat ramps used as driveways.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 25 Feb 20 - 05:20 PM

Mardi Gras is goin strong.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 Feb 20 - 08:50 PM

It ends tomorrow, when all Catholics go to church and have an "X" put on their foreheads with the ashes of last Palm Sunday's blessed palms. Then Lent starts and all good Catholics follow the fasting rules and the diet is as follows:

    No more than one meal per day is permitted.
    Flesh meat, eggs, butter, cheese, and milk are forbidden.
    The meal was not allowed until after sunset.
    Alcohol is forbidden.
    During Holy Week, the meal consists exclusively of bread, salt,    herbs, and water.

Of course, Laetare Sunday allows you to have cheese and a small glass of bad beer or wine to break the monotony of Lent. Vatican II lightened this up and you're now allowed one small glass of skim milk per day if you're over 87.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Feb 20 - 05:32 AM

florida is back in the news for arresting, handcuffng, jailing, mug shots and fingerprinting a 6 year old for acting out.
Don't worry, she was not spanked.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 01:00 PM

brave New rules;
Citizens may not be told of a stock market crash.
NOW you may only say that the market has gone into correction.
OR
you may say how much the market is off its lows.

Mom has not crashed, she has gone into a correctional facility.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 01:51 PM

Not a correctional facility, just an institution.

On the other hand, Mom is an institution.

Putting an institution in an institution is difficult, but not impossible. It's a bit like putting ten pounds of sugar in a five-pound bag. It's most easily achieved by curving space back on itself or similar judicious alteration of the space-time continuum.

Don't try this at home! Call a trained expert like Gluon.

***** DUCKDOG ENTERPRISES LLC *****

Space-time Continuum Alterations Made While You Wait

"We fold space like origami artists fold paper!"

(All Major Cards Accepted)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 04:43 PM

I saw a good Florida Woman story the other day but lost track of it before getting back here. Chances are she'll do something stupid again and maybe I'll manage to post it that time.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 05:08 PM

How's the knee?

I like the folded space idea but the results are not intuitive.
There is not a more crowded space but rather a much bigger space.
This is very handy in apartment living or inside a tardis.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 06:31 PM

... regarding the Lenten fast:
what about herring?
Can one eat herring?

Because there is a wonderful Gaelic poem
by an Irish monk,
welcoming the herring at Lenten time.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 06:37 PM

No, one may not eat herring during Lent. Herring are not fish, they are foul.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 08:03 PM

creamed herring is kosher.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 10:54 PM

Actually, I like canned herring snacks. I prefer them over sardines.

It's those over-salted dried kippered herring things that are inedible. I don't even think they're fish. When fishermen's work boots get so nasty and stinky that they can't stand to wear them anymore, they slice them into strips and sell them as kippered herring.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Feb 20 - 11:23 PM

kippered is slang for skipper who is the one who decides when the boots are, on average, ripe enough.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 28 Feb 20 - 12:53 PM

Pickled herring in wine sauce - a wonderful snack when eaten in moderation.

The knee is improving, according to the physical therapist, and the 2 months of workouts ahead of time give me a great edge on recovery as far as muscle tone. But as the one wearing the knee, I have to admit I'm tired of the compression sock things and the awkward moves that cause a flareup of bursitis in the hip.

The last couple of PT visits have concluded with me handing the spray bottle (water) to Katie and then lifting the cover from the dog door and letting the guys come in for a visit. The squirt bottle causes them to not be quite so pushy; for as little water as that thing puts out they still don't like it. And I've demonstrated my walker-dog-sweep move to keep them from jumping on me at the same time.

MOM's had more than her share of beer and wine since I'm forbidden from adding alcohol to the cocktail of stuff I'm on for the knee. She's going to have to walk off a little extra weight come spring. (Walking over to the Legion Hovel will give her some exercise, I guess.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Feb 20 - 10:16 PM

MOM, I've been finding stuff out about the local Catholic churches! For instance, if you count all the exterior doors, including the double and triple ones, there are 52. There are also 5 garage doors and 1 garden gate. There are three outside entrances to the two churches and the school, these enter the basements. Gee, it's grand to have once been a genuine Physical Security Specialist! You get to do such exciting things.

I used to like pickled herring but apparently it does things to your breath. I tried not breathing after I enjoyed some but it caused comment.

On another note, I seem to have bone spurs in the bottom joint of my left thumb. They hurt, but I can't get drafted!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 28 Feb 20 - 11:10 PM

A brainstorm (kopfstrum) by Steven Miller has inspired Trump to put a tariff on Chinese virus. He believes it will pay for the stock market
dip that was caused by Bernie worry.

I found out stuff about the Catholic bischops who tend the Vatican Bank. They filled buses with quarantined northern Italians to attend an ash wednesday gathering by the Pope. Due to a bad cold the Pope has suspended his duties.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 29 Feb 20 - 01:15 PM

Mom? Can you recommend a good, secure padlock that won't freeze up in temperatures well below 0F, is cut proof for a 36 inch bolt cutter, doesn't rust or corrode, which can be keyed alike or better yet have different keys for each lock and a master key, and which costs less than USD 10.00 each? And they have to fit a variety of hasps and chains!

Thank you, Mom.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Feb 20 - 01:25 PM

How many people you are shackling?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 29 Feb 20 - 02:02 PM

Maybe not people.
Maybe it's feral hogs ...

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 29 Feb 20 - 03:26 PM

Mom's recommendation is that Rap abandons his search for the ideal padlock and simply booby-traps whatever he was planning on putting locks on. The old string-tied-to-a-12 gauge's-trigger thing works dependably well and provides endless opportunities for imaginative variation involving creative use of pulleys, springs, weights, clamps, etc.

Or he could just spring for a pair of attack-trained Rottweilers.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 29 Feb 20 - 05:39 PM

BWL you can put yourself in Rap's position of living out in the country when wandering bands of corona zombies are looking for shelter.
You can't kill them and you can't risk exposure so locking them up humanely, letting them eat a lovely last spread in an abandoned shed and allowing the cold to do the rest is the obvious solution.

If you have a better idea don't be selfish. I believe Rap is a genius.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 01 Mar 20 - 09:33 AM

Left to my own ideas, I'd just use punji stakes -- heat treated for toughness and dipped in human poop. Maybe a barb on the insertion end. Or maybe one of those toe-popper land mines that just blow a leg off from the foot to the knee. But the people involved are wimps.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 01 Mar 20 - 10:22 AM

Landmines did come to mind.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 01 Mar 20 - 10:41 AM

But locks are more humane and cheaper.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 01 Mar 20 - 02:02 PM

Or Rap could just move to Florida and let the natural fauna take care of whatever miscreants he needs to lock his stuff away from. We have the best variety of deadly mammals, reptiles, fish, and invertebrates of anyplace in North America.

Better yet, move to Australia. They have so many deadly critters it makes Florida look like a petting zoo.