MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 04 Dec 19 - 06:27 AM

What do you expect with the actual thread gone and a policy of allowing only a scant few/membership to post in BS.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 04 Dec 19 - 07:35 AM

Hah! It's the Annual Holi/ydays and everyone is out shopping for presents to give me!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 04 Dec 19 - 11:53 AM

There are ways to slip in posts from the outside, but you have to know who to ask. . . just ask that Overlord fellow.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 04 Dec 19 - 12:00 PM

What would you like Rap? Do you like whale tusks or teeth?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 05 Dec 19 - 07:23 PM

I'd like some scrimshaw from the whaling ship "Essex" -- 19th century stuff, you know.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 05 Dec 19 - 08:00 PM

I have a whale tooth scrimshaw but I don't remember the ship. When I run accross it in the futility room, it's yours.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 05 Dec 19 - 09:39 PM

Nice! And I have a futility room also; lately the puppy keeps dragging the rug from in front of my washer out into the yard and dragging it through the lawn and leaves. It seems futile to try to keep the whole house out of this dog's reach.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 19 - 08:00 AM

Goodness, just keep it in a cage/crate. The house, not the dog. Keeping the dog in such is impossible.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Dec 19 - 08:18 AM

I was told the tooth is too heavy so it may be a forgery/fugazy to trick interior decorators.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Dec 19 - 09:12 AM

At 'Norwall tusks R us' you can get a Norwall tusk to defend yourself against mad stabers.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 06 Dec 19 - 09:26 AM

Stilly the way we tried to measure the curve or flatness of the universe was to trace humongous triangles and see if they added up to more degrees than a flat triangle. Why they got it wrong is that the
universe is bigger than we thought.

This question was asked of me in 1970 and I chose an open universe ie curved. Good catch, You found that link before I did.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 06 Dec 19 - 10:04 PM

I use a protractor, a piece of string, a fishing weight, and a level to measure the curvature of the Universe. It's quite simple when you know how. Oh, yes! I do my calculations on a 10" K&E log log decitrig slide rule (I used to use an abacus but I wanted more accuracy).

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 07 Dec 19 - 10:52 AM

Ah...I always wondered what instruments were used by the Mayans to measure the precession of the Earth in increments of 42,000 years.

I heard there is an impossibly large black hole nearby that is capturing smaller ones even closer to us.

Biden says, "if we can snag one, we will easily be able to broadcast ourselves into the future, no bones about it.
This is no Malarchy by cracky. We will first send whippersnappers for the long voyage with all the modern do hickies of home like a phonograph, ice box and ringer washers. 23 Skidoo!"

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 07 Dec 19 - 10:30 PM

I taught the Mayans. Also the Egyptians, Mesopotamians, Indians, Chinese, Atlantans, Greeks, Muans, and all the rest.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 08 Dec 19 - 02:04 PM

I started a pithy short remark about food porn on TV on the weekends, but seem to have accidentally closed that browser before sending. Darn.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 08 Dec 19 - 03:03 PM

I would believe you out read them all but I'm too savvy to believe you taught them. Ancient Alien Astronaut genetic engineers say "we did".

I am on my slide down from my cerebral maximum having had my migraine and visual trickery yesterday. See you guys on the other side of consciousness.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Dec 19 - 09:18 PM

Of course, in the beginning there was Nothing. Just a big, black Nothing. I had to invent the concept of "points" or there would have continued to be nothing to measure. If there was nothing to measure I couldn't teach all them folks how to measure. You may or may not thank me for this later.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Dec 19 - 08:19 AM

You have gone from emporer to God? Julius found this a difficult transition. Of course it is an honor to have God post here. Its better than being friended on Facebook.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 19 - 07:55 AM

You may address me as "Dominus et Deus meus." And I declare double tithing for all!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 11 Dec 19 - 10:39 AM

Please, make that a lowercase god - the panoply of gods created here at Mudcat all deserve to be lowercase. The uppercase one (created in the shape of man) is busy with war and pestilence right now. Best not call that malignant being over here.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 11 Dec 19 - 08:17 PM

Capitalization by demigods moves in strange and mysterious ways unlike mudelf rules.

Like, pope Fransisco the San Andreas treat.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Genisis
From: Donuel
Date: 11 Dec 19 - 08:39 PM

Once upon a midnight dreary
As I searched, both weak and weary,
For lyrics to song that was labeled "forgotten lore"
Then did I hear a pecking, pecking, pecking, pecking,



Some peckerheads, I thought, were pecking at my chamber door.

But no, I had searched for lyrics,
Using all the computer searching tricks
I had mastered many, many years before,
And I had stumbled into a den of old and eldritch scat
And there I posted, as a GUEST, my first post at Cafe Mudcat

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 11 Dec 19 - 08:55 PM

How high's the BS, mama?
Two feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Two feet high and risin'

They're a carryin' on about Schroedinger's cat
And why that is this and this is that
Everyone's a talkin' right outta his hat,
Two feet high and risin'

How high's the BS, mama?
Three feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Three feet high and risin'

It's comin' up from the ground an' down from the trees
It's comin' in ships across the seven seas
I'm pretty darn tall but it's up to my knees,
Three feet high and risin'

How high's the BS, mama?
Four feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Four feet high and risin'

It's a comin' from the sky just like it was rain,
It's outta control like a runaway train,
This whole bunch is loony, ain't none of 'em sane
Four feet high and risin'

How high's the BS, mama?
Five feet high and risin'
How high's the BS, papa?
Five feet high and risin'

Better get some hip-waders or a tall pair of boots
Its a risin' quicker than you can say "shoot"
An' these people is crazy as a whole buncha coots,
Five feet high and risin'

Well, it's five feet high and risin'



guess who wrote these last two.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 12 Dec 19 - 10:17 PM

Those were BWL and Rapaire

now back to our regularly scheduled incomplete reality of quantum physics.

The world is composed of quantum realities, so are our brains with 'micro tubuels'.   Einstein did elucidate the realities of the quantum universe, his only attack he made upon quantum theory was that it is incomplete. So let us complete it, shall we?

Lets look at a thought experiment in which an adjoining medium or 'space dimension' would allow for all the odd inexplicable behaviors of quantum wavicles. It would have to be a medium or space dimension that would allow for wavicles to disappear between states and account for entanglement.

It would have to allow for the very small to enter and exit this special space but block the macroverse. The properties of this special space or medium would have to allow a simulataneous touching of every spot in the universe to touch or be adjacent to one another.

It would have to be a very special and bizarre space indeed. I have always called it anti space and of course it would have to be, get this, invisible.

Such a space would allow for all the impossibilities of quantum mechanics. Sherlock said when you've tried everything and only one possibility remains, that has to be your answer. Well that defies logic but if the special space allows for all quantum shenanygans...it should be considered. The problem is we can not yet measure let alone see special quantum space.

There we completed the quantum mystery. thank you.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 13 Dec 19 - 01:00 AM

You can't top the New York Post for Bullshit. But in this instance they actually published something more bizarre than bullshit.

In case the link expires, the article says:

It’s a bird … it’s a plane … it’s a penis fish?

Thousands of “pulsing penis fish” have washed ashore on a California beach, as seen in jarring photos that are raising eyebrows due to the creature’s phallic shape.

The quirky marine life is officially called fat innkeeper worms (Urechis caupo), and an expert writes for Bay Nature that he believes a recent storm in the Drakes Beach area is the reason so many of them mysteriously appeared on the beach.

Ivan Parr, a biologist from the Western Section of the Wildlife Society, spotted them Dec. 6 and explains that the 10-inch fat innkeeper worm typically lives underwater, burrowing in mud or sand, but the storm likely carried them ashore.

“I’ve heard my share of imaginative theories from beachcombers, such as flotsam of a wrecked bratwurst freighter,” he writes.

However, Parr explains that a sausage ship accident is not the cause of this scene.

“We’re seeing the risk of building your home out of sand,” he says. “Strong storms — especially during El Niño years — are perfectly capable of laying siege to the intertidal zone, breaking apart the sediments, and leaving their contents stranded on shore.”

The spoonworm, which can live up to 25 years, feeds and swims using its “spatula-shaped proboscis.” It typically eats bacteria, plankton and other small particles, which it collects using “sticky mucus nets.”

Parr says he’s heard of sightings over the years in California at Pajaro Dunes, Moss Landing, Bodega Bay and Princeton Harbor.

The creature dates back 300 million years and also can be eaten. An anonymous colleague at The Post who has dined on a stir-fried fat innkeeper worm in Shanghai, China, describes the taste as “like a Livestrong band mated with a clam.”

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 13 Dec 19 - 08:30 AM

We don't have penis worms in Florida, but we do have Slippery Dicks.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 13 Dec 19 - 08:50 AM

Fortunately we have neither in Idaho! They wouldn't dare! Our State Legislature would quickly put a stop to it, if it didn't find a way to tax it.

By the way, our appeal of our property tax has gone to the State tax board. According to the letter we received yesterday this county has filed 279 such appeals, versus 325 for the rest of the STATE. The Board is also out of money for the appeals and will be asking the Legislature to an additional appropriation.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 13 Dec 19 - 10:29 AM

Edited my last post to capture the text. This way if/when the post goes away one can still read the text and search for photos of those lingam worms.

It's difficult for this thread to continue to generate high quality BS when the news of BS coming out of the UK suggests that much of that kingdom has gone berserk and re-elected their own clown head-of-state. Here's hoping cooler heads prevail here after Drumpf makes history (achieved while this post was being typed). But this is supposed to be an amusing, uplifting thread, not a really really scary story, so I will desist from further observation of this sort.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 14 Dec 19 - 12:19 PM

The MOAB Constitution sub section 272 Eyes Only addendum file FOIA 12268003FY states clearly :

(redacted) for all purposes to shield and protect (redacted) in order to promote unlimited comic (redacted) or SHOW OFF (redacted)...



So much for your version of what MOABS is supposed to be.
I'm sure the Bitches of the 7 stars and Lion's club agree ;^/

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Dec 19 - 10:14 AM

Mom!

I have horrible news! The Dollar Tree store no longer carries Mrs. Freshley's "Delicious Deals" mini-donuts! I suppose the wholesale price has gone up to where Dollar Tree can no longer sell them for a dollar. (They're $1.50 elsewhere.)

I suppose that's what happens when one's business model is "Everything's a Dollar". Even at very moderate inflation rates, there will eventually come a time when almost everything is more than a dollar. What will happen to Dollar Tree when that day arrives? Will they rebrand themselves "Dollar-and-a-Half Tree" where "Everything's a Buck-Fifty"?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 15 Dec 19 - 10:54 AM

Lots of Dollar stores have closed and are replaced by '5 Below'
Everything under 5 dollars

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Dec 19 - 04:05 PM

I tried to buy something at a dollar store. The sign said "Everything $1.00!!" They wouldn't sell me the store, the cashier, the computer system or ANYTHING! Big ripoff! I went next door and told a guy that I wanted to buy a brand new car for a dollar and told him the store next door said EVERYTHING was $1.00 and so why didn't he honor that?

Finally the cops and EMTs came and took me to the hospital in an ambulance with nicely padded walls.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 15 Dec 19 - 05:48 PM

Dollar General and Family Dollar have retained their names but they gave up on charging $1 for everything ages ago. There was another sort of dollar store, usually a real hodge-podge of stuff, a lot of it imported, and the owners were usually immigrants. Those places had some real treasures at times. I think the ones I used to shop at have all closed (probably because I'm not the only one who abandoned them for Big Lots years ago.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 15 Dec 19 - 08:49 PM

I have it! Dollar Tree just needs to change their slogan from "Where Everything's a Dollar" to ""Where Everything Would Be a Dollar If Trump Hadn't Slapped Tariffs on All the Chinese Crap We Sell".

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 16 Dec 19 - 07:47 PM

Just like family Storage lockers, large warhouses loose a lease or goes bankrupt. If you have capitol you can operate a dollar bush chain on the internet and sell on the business model of building 19 without real estate costs..

A clever buyer of distresed or abandoned merchandise can sustain a warehouse, shipping dept and internet workers almost like Amazon. Acquire crap at a maximum of 5 cents on the dollar and sell at 25. Expand to China for other abandoned crap when the time is right.

Call it 'INSANE JANE' AND SELL AT UNBELIEVABLE PRICES.

Finding the unlikely cheap large warehouse is key
know any?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Dec 19 - 12:35 AM

You can pay a fee to Amazon to keep that stuff in their warehouse, then the "Fullfilled by Amazon" line appears in your sales through Amazon as a vendor. Done and dusted.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Dec 19 - 11:07 AM

Large warehouses lik the RNC, Redskin stadium,Trump hotels, Trump Mega church...


This just in...

A transplant drug with anti-ageing properties has been shown to rejuvenate the oral health of old mice.
The drug, called RAPAMYCIN,
regenerated the bone in which teeth are embedded, restored the mouth microbiome to a youthful state and reduced inflammation.

It is the first time any treatment has been shown to rejuvenate oral health, says team leader Matt Kaeberlein at the University of Washington in Seattle. “We could actually see spots where new bone was growing around the teeth.”



Read more: https://www.newscientist.com/article/2227421-anti-ageing-drug-rejuvenates-the-mouths-and-oral-microbiome-of-mice/#ixzz68MTA7Rec

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Dec 19 - 12:54 PM

correction; RAPARMYCIN

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Dec 19 - 02:22 PM

While the yard next door is plowed with footprints in the snow, I haven't seen the four neighbors so far this week.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 19 - 09:24 PM

MOM! I just remembered that my automobile license plate begins 1BS in honor of you!!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Dec 19 - 10:51 PM

My current license plate ends in RIC, in honor of Ricky Ricardo. As long as I have that particular plate, I am obligated to shout "Honey, I'm home!" every time I walk through the front door.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 19 - 08:30 PM

Well, the 1B indicates the county (Bannock, the only county named for a bread product), but there's enough S here to share.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Dec 19 - 08:05 AM

Oh, this place is certainly a thrill every minute! Horrible Hank and Stormy Sam had their annual Christmas shoot-out at the Legion Hovel last night, complete with the Annual Pitch 'Em Out contest by the devotees of the place. HH flew the farthest (87.4 meters, metres in Canada, with SS in second place at only 67.0 meters). Naturally, their SuperSoakers were confiscated, and SS was found to also be carrying a hidden Nerf derringer! And as usual they had to buy a round for everyone in the Hovel at the time.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Dec 19 - 08:03 AM

Mom!

There are currently 19 threads in the "music" section upstairs and 26 threads in the BS section! There's more BS than music for the first time in recent memory! And some people had the nerve to say BS was dead!

Okay, half of those BS threads are the Brits going on incessantly about their political horseshit, but I suppose they count anyway. Sometimes you just have to take what you can get.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Dec 19 - 08:17 AM

Limeys calling each other names. Tsk, tsk. We would never ever do that in the US!

Granted, I do think it would be interesting if dueling (swords only) were re-instituted and folks had to put up or shut up. Knowing you might be called upon to put your life on the line to back up your cockamamie insults/opinions might make you think again before calling someone (excuse the language!) a "dumb poopyhead".

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 23 Dec 19 - 09:26 AM

It's 7:25 a.m. and there is NO SIGN OF SUNRISE!!!

The Galactic Overlord has stopped the sun from coming up! We're all gonna freeze and stuff!!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Dec 19 - 10:09 AM

The fog is so dense here you can't see a full block ahead of you, so what do you expect? The Galactic Overlord slept in this morning, apparently. (And I thinned out the Limeys yesterday, there was way too much bickering going on in that cross-thread running battle.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 26 Dec 19 - 03:31 PM

Mom!

Forrest Gump lied!

Life is NOT like a box of chocolates!

Life is like a claw machine in the vending area at the entrance to a Walmart. Most of the time, you just feed quarters to it and get nothing back. Every once in a while, you get a tiny stuffed penguin.

NOBODY ever gets the drone.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Dec 19 - 08:23 PM

I made a slight error. The sun did come up, and also yesterday and today. I shall predict that it shall come up tomorrow. I may write a song about it called "Tomorrow."

How's this sound?

The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow
There'll be sun!

I probably need some more verses. Amos would write it in jig time, but since I can't dance a jig (or much of anything else these days) I'll write it in plain ol' 9/16 or something.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 26 Dec 19 - 08:25 PM

Happy Gnu Year's is on the way.


And I noticed something curious.
The big Mother of All BS Threads is still closed for repairs;
that page still comes up.
What's curious is that I can use the Filter Search thread title feature,
enter Mother of all BS Threads,
and the Great Old Thread still appears in the search results.
That's how I got the 'closed for repairs' page.