MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 08:42 PM

Never, ever, look under your bed.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 06:49 PM

Note to self: vacuum under the fridge and freezer a couple of times a year and you won't have to pay the repair person to discover that that was the only thing wrong with the fridge. I can't think of the last time I thought to vacuum under there.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 06:46 PM

On the links the golfers come and go
Not speaking of Michaelangelo.
                -- Thomas S. Eliot, "Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock"
                      (version one)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 11:09 AM

From a mile away my river could be seen
writhing above its banks with ice flows
big enough to ride all thumping and bumping
each other in the great grinding gorge.
Up close the noise was a gutteral thunder
and the scary speed made me catch my balance
as the small to 3 foot thick ice raced by.
Its my river no more.
Not even the ice remains in Spring.
The climate has changed and the river
now fast and silent
keeps all its secrets.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 10:41 AM

Mom does not "tread water." Mom drinks water -- with various added substances to kill the germs of all sorts.

The grayness of Spring colors my soul,
And the tired river,
Full of flood,
Carries its sticks from eddy to eddy
Until, at last,
They find rest on the soft, silent bottom
Of the sea.
                   --Me, ca. 1966

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 07:43 AM

Ah it is becoming clear to me Rap's alter ego is Mark Twain while mine is Dave Berry

Moab is treading water until Moab advertises for more 'members' or the last Yukon prospector falls frozen in the sbow.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Apr 20 - 01:25 AM

I'll agree with you there, but Amos managed to keep the volume flowing (and wrote a lot of poems in the process.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 Apr 20 - 09:37 PM

I would be happy to rail against anyone or anything worthy of my talents. After all, I come from the Country Of THE Rail-Splitter himself (cf. Here, among other places.). More, I shall endeavor -- nay, assure you -- that you will get quality railing and splitting as I also come from a land where Truth is valued. For I, among others, am an inheritor of their skills. Should you not believe me, I to demonstrate my ability to any triple-twisted, double-distilled, jackass who wishes to open his (well, it IS a jackass) throat to bray against me.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Apr 20 - 11:19 AM

Amos was far more fact based than you suggest. He used to rail against me for not posting links. He had an unusual visual poetic skill.
Rap is the BS king by ascention to the thrown.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 Apr 20 - 11:10 AM

It was a lot easier when we had Amos' help. He could crank out the BS.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Apr 20 - 09:14 AM

A quarom is not present.
Without at least twelve individuals as disciples, it is incapable of maintaining quality BS or near magical accomplishments.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 26 Apr 20 - 09:01 AM

MOAB is dangerously close to the end of the queue,
and only we can alter that.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 24 Apr 20 - 08:27 PM

I assume there is no hockey in Canada right now.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 24 Apr 20 - 07:29 PM

Have you checked Canada?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 24 Apr 20 - 01:36 AM

The small-animal vet version of Heartguard is a topical skin application, the chemicals are dissolved in alcohol, or so it smells. And it's more like $25 a dose at this point. That's why I buy it from the UK, they cost a lot less (I use the UK version of Revolution, it's called Stronghold over there, and to order you need to know how much your dog weighs in kilos, not pounds. But the clue is the color of the box; my two largest dogs get the Teal box, US or UK.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Apr 20 - 09:57 PM

Labradoodles? You mean Trump couldn't even find a dog breeder who breeds purebred AKC registered dogs? Only some asshole who breeds mixed-breed mutts and then sells them for money? (Not that I have anything against mixed breed mutts. I have one. It's just that they should be for adopting, not selling.)

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Apr 20 - 08:36 PM

BWL it has come to my attention that you are qualified to lead the huge sprawling agency called Health and Human Services. The current head of HHS only has a background of being a breeder of Labradoodles in the last decade. You are far more qualified especially in these pandemic times.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Apr 20 - 06:24 PM

"Heartguard" the most popular heartworm medication sold by vets is nothing but ivermectin and pyrantel, two very common worm and parasite killers. You can get them from Tractor Supply in paste forms meant to be used with livestock, like cattle and horses. The cost is only pennies per dose. Yet the same stuff packaged for your dog costs $10.00 per dose? If I was sure I'd get the dosage right, I'd tell the vet to go screw and mix my own heartworm medicine up in the kitchen.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 23 Apr 20 - 03:13 PM

I forgot about the starving mosquitos.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 23 Apr 20 - 01:22 PM

I had to take the middle-sized dog to the vet today to get a heartworm test so they would sell me their very expensive monthly heartworm treatment. Next week I have to take the Lab in for his annual exam and get his heartworm treatment. I've been buying heartworm brand-name products from the UK for about 1/3 the cost than from US vets, but my UK supplier can't guarantee shipment with so few planes flying back and forth across that pond.

I don't think the mosquitoes are taking a break during the coronavirus shutdown. So I'm stuck with this situation for now. MOM says it would cost more to spray the dogs with mosquito repellent every day, and I guess she has a point.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Apr 20 - 08:03 AM

Mom!

Dollar Tree lies! They say "Everything's a Dollar!" So I rented the biggest truck I could find, hired a couple of winos to help out, went to the Dollar Tree store, paid 'em a dollar, and started pulling stuff off the shelves and loading it into the truck. The bastards called the cops!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Apr 20 - 09:22 PM

Gone with flowers everyone
oh when will they ever learn...

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 22 Apr 20 - 09:07 PM

Mom? Mom? Donde vamos ahora?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 22 Apr 20 - 11:01 AM

Trump Task Force Medical Advisor (Fauci replacement)
Dr, Ronald Armslong

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Apr 20 - 10:34 PM

If you ever see a photo of Donald's mom, all will be answered.



River's are starting to look cleaner

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 21 Apr 20 - 10:15 PM

I'd like to know how someone like Donald John Trump, born brunette, is now a blonde. As a life-long blonde I object.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Apr 20 - 06:34 PM

I don't even know anyone who has been tested. If I ever get tested and it turns out negative I will be disheartened knowing I never had asymptomatic or mild infection which would leave me open to all the variations. Trump was tested twice to determine if he is human but with a 30% error rate I am still skeptical.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 21 Apr 20 - 02:55 PM

The whole deal is the filling, which you avoided mentioning.
filling;
Browned Ground beef, thickened tomato sauce, a'zar seasoning, magic muhroom bits, Tampico, THC edibles, diced onion, celery salt and riccota cheese n chives to glue it all together.

Hey check out my face mask/ feedbag invention for sit down restaurant use. :^}

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Apr 20 - 08:47 PM

Mom, I tried to tell you of my parboiling discovery yesterday but somehow it didn't take. So anyway, I want to parboil a couple peppers (emptied, of course) to make stuffed peppers. But instead of parboiling them (I didn't have time) I put them in a (microwave safe) pan with about an inch of water in it. Nuked 'em for about 2 minutes, turned 'em over and nuked 'em for about 90 more seconds. Took 'em out, dumped the water, put the shells back in, filled 'em with the filling, and baked 'em for 20 minutes.

Tasted good.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Apr 20 - 01:20 PM

The International Time Travel Agency's failure to assist us in our current predicament was forecast long ago (in the future). While our future chrononauts were not vaccinated for Covid 19 they could not assist us if they wanted to. The message would not reach them anyway if they were on the way to Saggistarius A star or in near orbit around that black hole to vault them even further into the furure.

We can go physically into the future with face to face results but going back in time, while technically real, we can not be physically present.

It is 5 o'clock somewhere but it is not minus 1:14pm today anywhere or anywhen.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 19 Apr 20 - 01:02 PM

Now for something completely different.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 19 Apr 20 - 08:44 AM

Man's Ultra Ripe Excrement or 'Man'ure is fertile ground for bringing new things to life. In recent times however heavy metals and remnants of medication act as mutating pollutants. We have been selling these organic solids, spreading them on farm fields and wonder where all the ecoli outbreaks come from.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Apr 20 - 07:14 AM

When you forget what you wanted to say, it's just Mom's way if telling you that your BS needs to compost a while longer before it's ready to spread on the garden.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Apr 20 - 09:47 PM

The Immortal Unknown BS! The Dark BS that the Universe is full of!

Stilly, this was all of these fabrics. Let us say that she won't run out of fabric in general in the next few days.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: keberoxu
Date: 18 Apr 20 - 07:38 PM

I had something to say, and forgot what it was.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Apr 20 - 01:40 PM

Hi, Mom!

Here's a helpful hint! When you open a can of fruit cocktail, always dump it into a bowl or refrigerator container before serving. When most cans of fruit cocktail are filled, they're filled one ingredient at a time. So you wind up with stratified layers of peaches, pears, grapes, pineapple, and cherry halves, in that order. If you serve directly from the can, the first servings get all the "good" stuff and the last couple get nothing but peaches and pears. Dump it into a bowl and stir it up before serving so it's all the same mix.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 05:44 PM

3 STEPS TO REOPEN AMERICA

Expose yourself to general population and get tested if you can

Fight off whatever symptoms if any.

If you don't die go on with life.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 04:55 PM

TX has done 160,000 tests, virtually all by private lab$.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 04:34 PM

The wife has made them for 3 weeks and has a distributor at NIH
Running low on elastic though.
The us verses them strategy is alive and well in Texas regarding the death epidemic. They are resuming pre pandemic behavior at the peak of infection as per Govenor Trump Pal orders. %^|...

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 02:26 PM

Cute! And I bet she has a stash that is more than ample to work with for these masks. I have the pattern for the fitted masks, but I haven't made any yet.

I put two 3/4 size masks in the mail to my hairdresser (I also mailed her the payment she would have gotten this week for my bi-monthly haircut and highlights.) She has a three-almost-four-year-old daughter, so I pulled out polka dots for those. I hear this morning that they are a hit! She didn't like the masks that were too large for her.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 12:37 PM

Pat has started making both pleated and fitted masks for the Veterans' Home here. Here's one of the fabrics she's using. This is another.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 11:36 AM

There was a cessation of the sale of non essential items for nearly 2 weeks at Amazon. Non essentail sales has since resumed.


The definition of success is similair to the definition of Democracy in that once everything else fails due to stupidity and waste, what you are left with will serve as success no matter how dismal. Nothing goes exactly as planned.

In operation Walkyrie, the Bergdorf in Mara Lago will be...

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Apr 20 - 10:51 AM

Someone needs to be in charge of the notions department at Amazon. They are focusing on "essential items" in their delivery, I bet they figure that's food and medicine, right? Don't they know that elastic and rotary cutter blades are essential? How else will this army of home-sewers make all of these necessary face masks? I'm taking more time to make the bias tape than I am to make the masks themselves.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 16 Apr 20 - 12:23 PM

Shoulda paid da man his money, see? Me, I let the doc break it so he could screw it up. But you, Stilly, don't borry no money offa Da Man. You tell me and I'll fix ya up wid Da Lady and she'll treat ya right, see?

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Apr 20 - 01:42 AM

My last cast was so long ago it was white plaster, put on in layers by the doctor. I was seven and had done a fairly good job of breaking my leg.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 16 Apr 20 - 01:17 AM

The only cast I've ever had was black. That's all. Just black. All the cool colors were gone. Musta been lotsa people breakin' shit that week.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 15 Apr 20 - 09:57 PM

Mom? Mom? Did you hear the news, Mom? I've got a genuine fiberglass CAST on now! It's RED with black edges! And the stitches are out!

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Rapparee
Date: 14 Apr 20 - 08:56 PM

I wonder if the Galactic Overlord isn't simply turning down Betelgeuse with some sort of stellar dimmer switch, perhaps to save money on the starlight bill.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 14 Apr 20 - 08:44 PM

The supernova early warning system is now online. Maybe we'll hear something soon (if the bloviating hothead in Washington D.C. doesn't drown it out.) We get 2 hours notice before it blows.

I hear it here.

Subject: RE: MOAB - Mother of All BS [annex]
From: Donuel
Date: 14 Apr 20 - 07:48 PM

It feels like Betelgeuse is gonna blow this week.
Ya can'tmissit, it'll be as bright as the full moon.

The ol reumatiz acts up right before a super Nova