Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust

Subject: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: Joe Offer
Date: 30 Aug 26 - 02:12 AM

BALLAD OF MAE WEST'S BUST
(Earl H. Emmons)

My eyes have seen upon life's screen the wreck of countless dreams,
Where e'er I turn 'tis but to learn that naught is as it seems,
And 'neath the sun I've found but one tradition I can trust,
One thing that's sure and does endure
Is Mae West's bust.

My many years are wet with tears as down my checkered way
All I held true went up the flue and perished day by day;
I've viewed with grief each pet belief go crumbling into dust
Till quite bereft there's nothing left
But Mae West's bust.

The world is nuts and filled with mutts who should have died at birth;
We're led by heels with no ideals and morons rule the earth;
Our ancient creeds are crushed by greed, by graft and bunk and
lust
Till naught remains that's sure and sane
But Mae West's bust.

Nor friends nor fame remain the same, and life's a hollow shell,
I'm betting odds there are no gods, nor Paradise nor Hell;
No lucid laws, no Santa Claus; injustice rules the just;
In all life's range all models change
But Mae West's bust.

Though void of hope, still on I grope for something staunch and real,
My slender faith a frazzled wraith, yet seeking some ideal,
till wracked by care and black despair and glutted with disgust
My heart would stop without the prop
Of Mae West's bust.

Then let us crown this matchless mound for the courage it instills;
Oh noble shrine! Oh domes divine! Eternal as the hills;
Serene and fair it rises there, one promise we can trust,
One changeless thing to which we cling;
Mae West's bust.
note: tune not supplied, but it sings well to Auld Lang Syne. RG
filename[ MAESBUST
TUNE FILE: AULDLANG
CLICK TO PLAY
SW

8note Sheet

Subject: RE: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: Joe Offer
Date: 30 Aug 26 - 02:16 AM

Gee, we got a comment about this song from somebody named Jerry Dorbin. I respect his thought, but I'm still gonna sing my domes in duplicate.
I can't tell where the Digital Tradition song comes from. Who's SW? Can anybody find other sources for this song?

Here's Jerry's note:

I very much appreciate being able to pull up lyrics and poems by entering a title in the URL and clicking, but I frequently see misquotes and mistakes, many apparently because the provider listed what he or she thought he or she heard, and contributed by memory or from an earlier mistake instead of from a printed first edition.   Or, as in the case of your version of The Ballad of Mae West's Bust by Earl H. Emmons, because nobody but Rembrabdt and I can get it through their heads that a bust is the rib cage, not breasts.
    In your on-line version of the last stanza of Emmons' immortal poem, you print "Oh domes divine!" It's OH DOME DIVINE! The sweater, viewed in profile, doest have two bulges. Thank you.

Subject: RE: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Aug 26 - 12:18 PM

He's correct about "bust." "Bust size" is a measurement for sewing that is the rib cage 5" under the armpits. The DOME/DOMES question would come from what the poet thought (e.g., sometimes you see bosom or bosoms, though bosom is more correct.) But a search that lands on fragments of stuff by Emmons none of them actually prints the poem. It seems to be a rare booklet. From the Maewest.blogspot.com site

In 1928, the original Broadway production of "Diamond Lil," written by and starring MAE WEST, inspired a number of men to take pen in hand. [What else they took in hand, we leave to your imagination.]

Further down the page is this long list that might offer someplace to find a copy of the booklet to see what his words were:

• • Word comes from Mae-maven and researcher Mark Desjardins that a third publication inspired by Mae's successful Broadway blockbuster is an exquisitely hand bound 21 page booklet, privately printed in an edition of 100 copies on premium weight ivory stock. Light verse was the specialty of Earl H. Emmons, who owned and operated Maverick Press in The Big Apple.
• • About this project — — "Reward of Virtue: a versified version of the great bed and bar-room epic, Diamond Lil, written and played by Mae West" — — Mr. Desjardins has assembled this intriguing back story:
• • • • Written by Earl H. Emmons, and published in 1938 by Maverick Press in New York, it clearly is a labor of love.
• • • • In the forward, Emmons stated that in the spring of 1928, he went to see Diamond Lil, and it occurred to him that the plot had amusing possibilties for some versified foolery. Over the next few weeks, he saw the play a number of times, made notes and learned the lines. After writing his opus to West, he typed one copy, made it into a little book, and sent it to Mae West, who "expressed enthusiastic apreciation and suggested I come up and see her some time in the near future so that she might thank me personally."
• • • • Emmons called on West the very next evening after the performance and "collected her personal thanks, the nature of which is no one's business." However, he did state for the record that West told him she had received the booklet just as she was preparing for her performance, and without even completing her makeup, went onto the stage, assembled the entire cast in whatever stages of undress they happened to be and proceeded to read it to the company, delaying the evening performance by twelve minutes. Emmons then goes on to apologize to anyone being annoyed by the delay that evening, and asks them to "stop blaming Miss West and turn their venom on me."
• • • • A year later, in 1939, a book of poetry entitled "An Uncensored Anthology," published by the Peter Pauper Press of New York, reprinted Emmon's "Reward Of Virtue," along with other poems by him entitled, "Mae West's Bust," and "Ballad of the Twin Buttes." Another poem suggestive of West entitled "Frankie and Johnnie" was included in this collection attribued to "Anonymous."
• • • • I was thrilled to discover a mint copy of Earl H. Emmons's original booklet recently, and recommend anyone trying to search out the later published copy in the Anthology for sheer reading enjoyment. A classic early appreciation of Mae West — — and one she clearly took pleasure in.
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
• • The amusing lines that Emmons titled "Mae West's Bust" also appeared in a book called "Rowdy Rhymes." Henry R. Martin drew the illustration you see here.
• • Rowdy Rhymes. Gathered from Many Gay Minstrels [Publisher: Mount Vernon, NY — — Peter Pauper Press, 1952] Illustrated by Henry R. Martin; 61 pages

Diving down my Library research rabbit hole, WorldCat lists this book as having 60 pages with illustrations. OCLC Number (Unique identifier): 1088888881061057

Gettysburg College's Musselman Library has a copy. Maybe your local library can do an interlibrary loan. (Chances are they might send a scan instead of the actual book.) The description of their book is 60 pages: illustrations; 19cm

There is another monograph, what sounds like a reprint from Peter Pauper Press, Mount Vernon [1958], listed without author information but the description makes me think it is the same (60 pages illustrations 19cm) and quite a few libraries have it. The OCLC Number (Unique identifier) is 230984431. That's the information your library can use to see about Interlibrary loan. WorldCat says there are five editions in 69 libraries. The institutions nearest to you aren't necessarily the ones that might loan it, but for what it's worth, the California State University, Los Angeles' John F. Kennedy Memorial Library has a copy, as does the California State Library in Sacramento and the San Francisco Public Library, SFPL Main Library.   

Aha! Just looked at all of those editions: there is an eBook from 1939, Peter Pauper Press, Mount Vernon, NY, 1939

The Reproduction notes on that volume are: Electronic reproduction, [Place of publication not identified], HathiTrust Digital Library, 2017

The HathiTrust lists Rowdy ryhmes and bibulous ballads gathered from many gay minstrels/Newly illustrated by Henry R. Martin. They offer a link to Google Books
Google lists the bibliographic information as:

Title        Rowdy Rhymes and Bibulous Ballads Gathered from Many Gay Minstrels
Publisher        Peter Pauper Press, 1939
Original from        University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign
Digitized        Jan 17, 2017
Length        61 pages

That Google page says "no eBook available" but it is probably print on demand from the scan.

AND after all of that, and the servlet links not working I searched BookFinder.com and you can get a print copy of it for $4 (plus $2 shipping) and the prices go up from there.

Whew. Roundabout, but there you have it. Buy a copy and see what the line in the poem says.

Subject: RE: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 30 Aug 26 - 12:48 PM

I could have just cut to the chase and shared the Bookfinder results, but the post is sequential, I added to it as I pulled up and analyzed search results and it would be a shame to waste it. Someone might find something helpful there 15 years from now. :-/

Subject: RE: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: keberoxu
Date: 30 Aug 26 - 06:51 PM

This would come up when the news is focussed on Dolly Parton . . .

Subject: RE: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 30 Aug 26 - 11:41 PM

I am MORE than a little confused.

When WE order a silk, size 36 brassiere from Victoria' Secretions, we are NOT referring to waste, thighs, buttucks.or coresette.

We desire a

Sincerely,
Gargoyle
We need to keep things clear ... What Brits mean by one term ... well ... Americans might differ

Subject: RE: Origins: Ballad of Mae West's Bust
From: robomatic
Date: 01 Sep 26 - 03:04 PM

"It was winter in the alps and the snow lay heavy on the slopes of Brigitte Bardot."

Spike Milligan writing for The Goons.