BS: 'Spawditty

Subject: 'Spawditty
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 05:26 PM

Here's looking atcha, 'Spaw, me lad; some misbegotten muse who couldn't read a map showed up in my headbones this afternoon reciting the following, which it seemed to me should be dedicated to you (not at you, please understand!).

No Bullshit From You

I've sailed across the open seas,
At least four out of seven,
I worked down on the hard-luck strand
Where fortune comes  unleavened
I've cracked my bones a'breaking rock
In hopes of finding gold
And I've lived the soft suburban style
And slowly, I've grown old;
So I'm looking out from many years
And I guess I think it's true
I will share your joy, and support your tears
But I want no bullshit from you!
 

Cho:

The trains come in, the trains go out

We're all on the same damn ride

And each of us knows exactly how

The truth should be described

And you may say it's pale mauve

And I know damn well its blue

So even though you have my love,

I want no bullshit from you

I have let you whine and cry and pout
When that was what you wanted
And I've shut my mouth when those about,
Their ditzy feelings vaunted.
When you were feeling put upon
I'd help you from your maze
And trim your sheets and tend your helm,
And tighten down your stays;
And I have not run the open seas
As I would have loved to do;
So darlin' pay attention please,
I'll have no bullshit from you.

I've watched you try the temples on
And spout their mindless slogans
And I helped you out when your life got stuck
In that  hippie's beaded hogan!
And I'll always drive you home again
If your path seems a dead end
And I hope you know I always hope
To be an honest friend;
But I got to say, from my heart of hearts
And you'd best believe its true
Although I hope we never part,
I want no bullshit from you.
 

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 05:51 PM

Truly lovely there Amos.........Although I am confused about the bullshit stuff. I'm honest and sincere, basically a shy guy who would never dare to offend and wouldn't say feces if he had a faceful. I'm generally so kind and considerate that its embarassing to watch me kowtow to the higher life forms that rule my life. My every breath is so sweet, it smells like Carnation milk. I wouldn't dream of provoking those around me with sarcastic and nasty references, just not in my makeup. So I am a bit confused by any reference to me in terms of giving bullshit to anyone. Amos, I want you to know and be assured that I mean it with all due humbleness and with deep respect when I say fockoffasshole, which I believe is a German word, although its meaning is unknown to me.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Áine
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 05:53 PM

Methinks I saw a pig fly by . . .

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Mbo
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 06:05 PM

Or fingers crossed behind a back...

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 06:34 PM

Naw, Spaw, ya got me crossed up backwards. It was a sympathetic song which I thought reflected certain sentiments you might, at some point in your crayola-colored life, resonated to. But mayhap, you dried up squirrel-scrotum bodhran-head, your resonating days are over, so fockoffyerownselfasshole, which is Lithuanian for if you take my meaning sir!

Actually, I repeat it was for and not at you, but I mighta known you'd take it backwards -- seems to be a style of yourine. Nevertheless, if you can pull your head out far enough to take it from a different perspective, it will have a different meaning -- I had envisioned you as singing it in rude, loud tones while rolling down the halls of the Encrusted Curmudgeon wing...offending the nurses and making pagans out of the doctors...

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Troll
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 06:50 PM

Ya know Spaw,your discription of yourself reminds me an awful lot of me. Except that I'm also an astronaut and I fill in for the Easter Bunny on weekends.

Otherwise, it's right on!

troll

p.s. Amos. Great as usual! "BFG"

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: wysiwyg
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 07:55 PM

Won't somebody tell me what Ditty Spaw Ditty means?

Amos, apparently Spaw does not reckanize hisself without his gnarly crew round about him. I read it ezzackly like you say (you say dere berry good) before scolling down to Maui. Where did the verse with his mates' names go? (Into a white squall.)

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:15 PM

Doesn't deign...hmmmph

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:24 PM

Well, ya' know, I'll try to make it work for me Amos, but I can't imagine myself being so rude and crude to people. To tell anyone the above would indicate an egotistical, nasty streak that would be completely alien to my polite and couteous manner.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Áine
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:27 PM

Whooooopsss -- there went another little piggie through the clouds!

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:28 PM

I am sorry, sir, to have misestimated you -- my aplogies for listening to unfounded rumopr from a myriafd of unscrupulous sources...I thought you were scrupulously frank, even unto offense, but I see this is not the case -- that must be some other Asspaw they were talking about...

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Mbo
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:34 PM

Oompaw Oompaw Oompity Spaw! I've got a little secret fer y'all!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Troll
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:35 PM

Amos. Would you like to buy a bridge? You could get rich off the tolls. I'd hang on to it-it's been in the family for years-but my health is not good an dI'm thinking of retireing to Florida. Oh. I've got some property down there I might sell too. You could call it waterfront property. Let me know if you are interested. At the price I'm asking,it won't last long.

troll

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: catspaw49
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:38 PM

Yes Amos, I've long suspected it was some other Catspaw who openly offends damn near everyone. It could be someone else. I'm certainly not the type to suggest to GG that he "have a brew and a smile and shut the fuck up" as that other Catspaw person did. Dearie me........

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Amos
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:41 PM

I'm proud of you, 'spaw...who you are is fine with me ---- you're just the kind of tribal elder I've always thought I would enjoy...what's that screaming I hear down the road?

Subject: RE: BS: 'Spawditty
From: Mbo
Date: 24 Feb 00 - 11:44 PM

GOT TO REVOLUTION GOT TO REVOLUTION!!!

--Mbo