BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced

Subject: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:37 PM

Gee, I 've helped CLOSE a lot of taverns but I never showed up in broad daylight to OPEN one!!

Oh good, I see my undies are still waving proudly on the flagpole. Oh, the place is locked up! Hey! I just busted down the door!

Hardiman and I will be cooking, all ethnic cuisines attempted, all served with a BG on the side.

AND we got every kinda hot sauce known to man, we been visiting *Emeril* so watch out for notches unknown!!

Mbo, willya man the FUG zone, I think we need to have us a FUG-A-THON!!!! Remember--catspaw's 49 FUGGING RULES!!!

And stay away from the phone-- Mr. Rococo's turn is next.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: ceitagh
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:42 PM

Ummm....what is FUG? 'cause i heard ya do it to new members and that's makin' me nervous. . Dare I come in?

pax ceit

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:45 PM

Oh it's all good clean fun, Ceit. Spaw expalined it recently, I can't remember where. Come on in, what'll ya have?

And it isn't new members only get FUGGED. Everyone need a good FUG once in awhile.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: annamill
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:46 PM

Hi people! Just stop in to make a SUGgestion. For those who don't FUG, just SUG! (I stole this) "Remember, if you can't FUG it SUG it!"

Back to work. Love,annap

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:47 PM

don't worry - we make lots of messes here, but when we do, we clean up using FUG, the 100% organic, folk-approved tavern cleansing agent. Dirty floor? FUG it! Dirty shirt? FUG it! Dirty Mind? Welcome!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:50 PM

Aw, FUGGIT Mmario, you old dear!

Are ye staying for lunch my man?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: ceitagh
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:53 PM

Root beer for me then....but I shall have to leave soon. Do we have some cyber munchies around?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:54 PM

Glad you too were a Foxx freak Anna!!! Yeah, if you can't FUG it...SUG it.

(New friends.......This was from an old Redd Foxx routine folks.....He advertized FUG soap......"Dirty dishes piling up?...FUG 'em. House is dirty and messy...FUG it. etc,etc,etc. And as annap pointed out, part 2 of the routine was for SUG...you get the idea)

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:55 PM

Yes, of course, we have special little kibbles, but I recommend you leave them alone. I think I saw Cleigh O'Possum in here last time and.... he may have... well just have a root beer float then, there's a good girl... and come on back later, hear?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 12:57 PM

just popped in for a caffiene....have to get to the bank and then back to w*rk. road trip tonite!!!!!! yes! got the sixpack of jolt ready in the car....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 01:30 PM

Go with God, love...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: M. Ted (inactive)
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 02:28 PM

Sorry, I was just dusting off my old Fugs songbook--from "Slum Goddess" to "Wet Dream Over You"--but I guess not--

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 02:40 PM

Yes!!! FUG 'em!!!

In fact, howsabout you run the FUG-a-Thon till MBo comes in?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 03:09 PM

The phone rigs, Praise answers.

"Oh hey, Bes'Bud Sorcha!!! Whassup?"

"Draw me a pint and set up the Jello pit, I'm on my way over!"

"Rough day, eh?"

Rough? ROUGH? Tell ya what. Put all the cookin' aside and when I get there I'll drag yer a** inta the jello pit. I need ta jello wrestle, you'll do that won't ye girl?"

You got it!"

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Philj200
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 03:24 PM

Like many others in the East Village, I played with the FUGS for a very short time. Sitting in for various regualr members etc. It was the time when they were playing at a ratty little theater up a metal staricase on 8th street.

We did a song/dance called The Gobble.

It is something to be experienced!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Sorcha
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 03:29 PM

Well, FUG me, shug! I finally get a break from cat shit and dog spit, come over here for a pint, and Praise is in the Jello Pit agin. I am going to have to stop this, my laundry lady complains about the stains! OK, one round in the pit, and loser has to FUG knickers! Ready, set, GOOOO! (love the splash boards, man)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 03:29 PM

Go ahead and teach us!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: M. Ted (inactive)
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 03:44 PM

Phil--The Gobble? One can only imagine--Of course, we (or at least I) want to know everything--

When I was a maladjusted high school punk, there were only two places in the whole state of michigan where you could buy ESP records--I prevailed on the manager of my favorite record store to order "THE FUGS FIRST ALBUM", for me--he got two copies, as was his custom, one for me, and one for the rack, which got him busted--

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 04:36 PM

FUG it all! I'm outa here! *opens "The Door" and steps through*

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Philj200
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 04:39 PM

Okay. But I'll cut out some of the grosser aspects. This was at the time just beofre the first album was released. I think it had already been recorded but not out.

The music was chaotic. Four drummer (sometimes and two guitarist) sometimes, as a goof, we'd played the entire night in just an E-chord. Not key of E. Just the one chord.

Back to The Gobble. On the AM radio, groups where having signature songs. Freddie and the Dreamers urged people to DO THE FREDDIE, etc, Got the picture?

Ed (usually) sometimes Tuli, would rev up the crowd with crapola alongs the lines of "we're going teach you the song sensation that's sweeping the nation, the move that's gonna' groove..." Meantime, the band (me included) would be trying to whip up a frenzy.

"I need a volunteer!!!!!" Ed would shout. And he would pick the pinkest co-ed'iest girl in the house. He would practically carry her to the stage. (The music never pauses.)

Invariably, she would say something along the line of "What do I do?"

Ed would say something like "screaming is appropriate." We'd hit a chord (E-major?) Ed and Tuli (who had come up just behind the girl) would drop to their knees, throw their arms around the girl's waist (remember, they always licked little, light and non-athletic looking girls).

Then with Satanic grins, they would bury thefaces into her. Ed aiming for the front. Tuli for the back. The girl would usually explode but was pinned in place. If they was a boyfriend, he would sometimes assault us. Usually not. But he did turn odd colors. Where does be a sport and being a victim abut? If she came with a bunch of girlfriends, they would go hysterical urging the band on. (Most of the time.)

We'd keep it up longer than the shock value would indicate. Then when you would think we were really getting into it, we'd stop and Ed would lead the girl back to her seat, "give a hand to the little lady. What a sport, Thank you very much. Come on everybody give it up."

He's get back to the stage. And urge everybody to Do The Gobble. Sometimes they did.

The first time I saw this happen, people just stared in disbelief. After the show I made some crack about not all shows being successful. Ed said, "Waddaya talking about. This was a great show. Nobody attacked us."

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 04:51 PM

Man! Ya shoulda come over to do that in the jello pit! Now I gotta go find a laundromat-- FUG my own self!

Boys, tend bar till I get back--

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Sorcha
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 05:09 PM

Does that mean I WON the Jello wrassling? Whoopeee, I'm the clean knicker Queen!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Mbo
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 05:27 PM

Hey hey hey! What's all this then? What EXACTLY am I supposed to be manning? Did someone mention doing the Freddy? I LOVE THAT SONG! "It's the thing to do, kids will envy you, do the Freddy...." And if anyone wants to do The Gobble--no not you Cleigh... Praise, PLEEZE explain!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Sorcha
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 05:36 PM

Mbo, my main man, she's got you runnin the FUG-A-THON. Hardest part is to rmemeber the rules! (does anybody know em?)Me, I'm just mindin the jello pit, case anybody wants to challenge me!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Mbo
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 05:40 PM

Sorry, can't go up against you...I wanna stay on your GOOD side! Yes, what are the 49 rules? I fear it has more to do with soap!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Barbara
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 05:55 PM

Ahem, *cough* I wish to read to you the haiku that won me this year's National Scholastic Award. (adjusts his hornrims, straightens skinny tie)(cough)
Do not blame me for your knock-up:
In the wet sand the feet of the mud elephant
Leave no tracks.

Something like that? From the FUGS first(?) album.
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:07 PM

Mbo, your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to run the FUG-A-Thon. You must first FUG yourself.

Be on the lookout as people enter the Tavern. If they have brought with them any confusion, lack of clarity, under-aologizing, over-apologizing, guilt, or inappropriate self-image of any sort, FUG 'em, at once, and FUG 'em good.

Especially important will be the effective and comradely FUGging of Apologizing Guest, should s/he announce his/her membership name here at the Tavern, at which time I anticipate many many more FUG-ees will crowd in to buy the dear a drink (on whose tab?)

You will have to intuit Spaw's 49 FUGging rules from your awareness of the essence of Spaw. Or seek his FUGging guidance as a last resort.

I'll be back later to help clean up. Or cook. FUG 'em good Me-Beau Me-Boy, FUG 'em all, and start wioth the tall. FUG 'em all, and let God sort it out.

Should you decline this opportunity, it is possible that no one will ever get FUGged again. I know you don't want that.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Mbo
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:14 PM

Um....FUG myself? Shouldn't someone FUG me first? And what if the Anonymous Guest is a guy, then what?

--Mbo ('Spaw where are you!)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:28 PM

I'm right here and I'm the SOB who's on YOUR ass to go have some 3-D fun and meet MARIO!!!!!

Hey Tavern Dwellers......Go see the thread that Mario started about his long weekend at a ren-fair in Raleigh NC...90 miles from Meebo....Go ahead and check it out....its called "BS: Long Weekend"

Then come on back and throw the lad out of the tavern til gets a real life and meets another 'Catter...and a good one...in the flesh.'

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:36 PM

If I offer to get FUGGED can someone get these green jello stains off me???

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: ceitagh
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:42 PM

H'lo everyone...is there any jello here for the eatin'? or is it all in the jello pit?

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:47 PM

Hi al...........I'll be happy to give you the FUGgin' of a lifetime. As the distibutor, I am well versed in FUGgin and jello is no problem...neither is Wesson for that matter.

SOMEBODT BRING ALISON A DIET COKE WHILE I GIVE HER A FUGGIN SHE'LL NEVER FORGET.............uh, where's the Irish Spudthong at?

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Sorcha
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:52 PM

Mbo, you better do what spaw says, you know how cranky he gets when nobody listens! Hie yersel to the RaleighRennFaire, and FUG Master Mario! Git, boy!

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:55 PM

ooohhh... wellll.... this is ....er....... different...... just what are you trying to do down there spaw???......... hahaha that tickles........... WOW.... it works too... my legs are almost back to the way they were.......... keep going Spaw.... don't stop now......

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 07:57 PM

sorry I forgot...... mmmm... yessss...... you're the best.......

(was that OK spaw?)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: ceitagh
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 08:01 PM

In, out, in, out....gotta leave again peoples, there's a stack of dirty dishes calling my name! (or maybe that's just m'mother....)

ta ta ceit

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Big Mick
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 08:13 PM

The door flies open and the biggest fuggin' Mick you have ever seen in your entire life strides across the floor.........................BARKEEP, WHAT THE HELL DOES A FELLA HAVE TO DO TO GET A JAR OF THE VILE BLACK STUFF IN THIS JOINT? Anyone seen THE FAIR ONE? Hi, Spaw.........what the??????.....You dirty sonofa........SOMEONE GET 'SPAW'S OLD ROOM AT THE HOSPITAL READY, ....HE'S GOIN' BACK.......Why?????? He's fuggin' me FAIR ONE, dat's why.......damn, a fella goes off to do his civic duty and right away someone is on his turf.......and my buddy no less............shit........WyoWoman, let's go have dinner, I'm cookin'......

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 08:19 PM

RUN SPAW........ I'll be right behind you........

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 08:31 PM

So Mick buddy.........uh, yeah........back from the wars huh?.....I was just doing a little "Goring" myself and uh....alison is just...uh, alison.....where did alison go? How about a drink and I'll give you a free bottle of my other fine product that you can give to alison as a gift.......Here you go....A bottle of SUG....Great stuff, just give it to alison and ask her to SUG you........so,uh....how's tricks? Hey, while you're waiting for alison to comeback, why not jump on Meebo ass about not meeting Mario....Mario is only going to be 90 miles from where he lives and he's not going to see him........maybe you could give him some advice, thread's called BS:Long Weekend........Now let's have drink til alison comes back........Where's WW? I KNOW she could use a good FUGgin!!!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: ceitagh
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 09:11 PM

Well, I'm back! Anything interesting happen while i was gone?
ceit

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Mbo
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 09:59 PM

Ok, Big Mouth 'Spaw...I'm gonna try all my tricks here to go, but I'm not guaranteeing anything...even though I REALLY need to get wood this weekend...I guess I can put it off until last minute. Now leave me alone and get me a Coke?

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:02 PM

ceits, I can see you're going to be a welcome addition around this place!!! Wanna get FUGged? Alison seems to be missing and the Big Mick is feeling a bit sudsy........

Spaw (IF you haven't been to bbc's Mudcat Resources, go and check him out.....you'll see why. He's not too bright though as he once stuffed his thong with a potato...good idea, but he put it in the back!....The pics are fun, brings a bit of realism to the place)

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:03 PM

getting "wood" isn't what I think it is ... is it????? I seem to remember a documentary on making porn movies(the men had to be able to "get wood".... you can guess the rest........ hahahahahhaa

glad to hear you're going to go Mbo.. you won't regret it.

PS dont' tell Mick you saw me here.. I'll just hide over here in the shadows........ 'til he calms down

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:05 PM

Find some other way to get wood, Mbo! I can offer some suggestions...

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Sorcha
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:07 PM

the Jello Queen is here! I really need a good FUGGIN;! I need a pint--hey, where'd the Bartender go? She's still not back from the laundromat? My, them knickers musta been real bad.............

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: northfolk/al cholger
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:12 PM

Just a moment before Mick walked in...I'm thinking, it's a long while, and I love lime jello...body temp...oh it's a piss poor hide, that can't take one tanning...and Mick looks big...but this is only a 15 inch monitor, and who wouldn't be provoked...by a suggestive talking...I always wondered what down under, meant...Spaw, keep him running, when you think you got him wore down...throw the moscow strangle hold on him... alison, I could learn to type in colour...can any of you sing "El Paso" with an Irish-Aussie accent....

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Mbo
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:14 PM

Yo Spaw, lay off Ceit, lessin' you wants a swirly in the Jello pit!

--Mbo

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: M. Ted (inactive)
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:20 PM

Thanks for the story, Phil--I don't usually pop in to these threads, but I am glad I did today--

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: ceitagh
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:24 PM

I seem to have a protector! Thanks Meebs, but I think I'll be fine.

Spaw: Thanx for the kind welcome! I checked out bbc's Resources...the pics give everybody a face, which is nice...tho I didn't see you there- why's that?

Enough chatter! Where's the bartender?

Ceit

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Tavern FUG-a-Thon Announced
From: Mbo
Date: 23 Mar 00 - 10:38 PM

'Spaw there alright. He's the goofy-lookin' one blowing up Cleigh O'Possum the ocarina's bum. And there's a great pic of him in some groovy suspenders!

--Mbo