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Starting a thread cos I'm fed up
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Subject: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 31 Jul 00 - 09:46 AM Well.......... I cant think of a great topic that will get everyone posting........... Best to come clean and the title says it all. I suppose I feel a bit lonely. I have been given "make work" to do and do not felel inclined to comply. Also its one of those horrid anniversaries - 3 years since Mum died - oh heck I am wallowing in a vat full of pity. Go on give me your scorn, tell me to pull myself together - or you nasty flamers could have a field day.... ah....I don't care..... miserable(probable wishes she hadn't posted this) usually happy Patrish |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Catrin Date: 31 Jul 00 - 09:53 AM Cheer up Patrish. I have a pile of work to do, but don't feel particularly inclined today. Some days we just can't quite get there, and perhaps this is one of them. BTW, I have a postcard stuck on my desk at home, which keeps me going when writing essays, doing bills etc. It says, quite simply - |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Mrrzy Date: 31 Jul 00 - 09:57 AM Patrish, this is one of the best places to post these kinds of things. I did it and it helped tremendously. Small advice - do the makework, it will give you something to concentrate your but-I-don't-FEEL-like-it onto, which will make the rest of the universe suddenly better by comparison. I also have a card on my office wall - it has a small child at the foot of a large set of steps, leaning way over and resting its forehead on the second step. Looks dejected and unwilling to even attempt the climb. The inside says (it's a quote from Chekov - that's Anton, Mbo, not Pavel): Any idiot can face a crisis. It's this day-to-day living that gets you down. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Brian Hoskin Date: 31 Jul 00 - 09:57 AM I know the feeling. Try and keep your head up. You're not alone. Brian |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Sorcha Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:01 AM My favorite has always been Don't Let the Bastards Get You Down!! |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: SINSULL Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:02 AM I HAVE AN OLD MUG WHICH SAT ON MY GRANDMOTHER'S TABLE FILLED WITH SPOONS. IT SAYS:"CHEER UP. THE WORST IS YET TO COME." So go ahead and wallow. Despite my mug, tomorrow will be a better day. Mary |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Catrin Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:03 AM Across atlantic translation needed here. What's 'makework'? I genuinely don't know what it means. Catrin (who'stryingnottoseemthick) |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:04 AM Thanks I really feel bad at posting this thread, but sometimes there is not anywhere else to turn. I will do the "make work" I have decided that the next hour will be dedicated to getting it done...... so if I post again in the next hour I will have to think up some punishment for myself. Thanks for being there (oh that sounds corny)Its just after 3pm here, talk to you again at 4pm Patrish |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Little Hawk Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:04 AM Well, you know, life is like a body of water...it comes in waves. You're just down in the trough right now, that's all. Part of the problem is that we've all had this trip laid on us that it's "bad" to feel miserable. It's not bad. If we didn't somtimes feel miserable, we wouldn't even know what it means to feel happy. Being miserable can be quite an interesting experience, actually. Try writing a poem about just exactly how miserable you are...some great poetry has come out of this kind of thing. Put on the saddest Jackson Browne records you've got and wallow in the pathos of life. I guarantee it will pass in a while, so you might as well make the most of it before it does. Best wishes to Patrish from your brother, Little Hawk. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Callie Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:06 AM I don't know what "make work" is either. but here's a suggestion for you Patrish: pop out to your nearest record shop at lunch time or after work and treat yourself to that cd you've been wanting for ages ... feel better? |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Gary T Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:07 AM Catrin, I'm pretty sure "makework" is what's also called "busywork"--stuff that doesn't really need to be done that consumes time and keeps one busy. It can be really frustrating if you want to actually ACHIEVE something. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:10 AM Oh heck promised myself I wouldn't post. Catrin:Make work is work that you are given to do that does not really serve a purpose. In my case I am re-doing work I was asked to do in a precise way. I have been told to do the same thoing but in a diferent format - simply to give me something to do as we are in between projects and there is very little stimulus to motivate. So I am re - hashing some work already done simply for the sake of appearing to be busy Little hawk: never had a brother - thanks Patrish |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Catrin Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:11 AM Gary, You've just written my current job-description! "stuff that doesn't really need to be done that consumes time and keeps one busy. It can be really frustrating if you want to actually ACHIEVE something." (I've got an interview tomorrow for another one - need luck, lots of it!) Thanks, Catrin |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Giac Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:12 AM Used to have a t-shirt like that, Sorcha:
Iligitamatum non Carborundum Plunge in quickly, ye speakers of Latin and correct my spelling, but that's how it was on the shirt, dammit!
Patrish, I say WALLOW.
It won't take very long to become annoyed with it yourself, you'll find something to laugh at and it will ease up. I have a five-day period of death anniversaries around the first of December which usually puts me in an unscalable pit. I have found, however, that if, on the first day I mentally (but not physically) tear my hair, gnash my teeth and wail, I can take it to such a ridiculous state that I make myself laugh. Then I envision the departed family members (mom, dad, etc.) laughing at/with me and everything chills out. Thinking of you. Giac |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: death by whisky Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:13 AM Have a cup of tea.Ah go on,go on,go on...! |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: A Wandering Minstrel Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:15 AM Hey Up Patrish. know just what you mean about that makework stuff. The card on my wall says "When things are getting worse, please send chocolate. Unfortunately I don't know of a way to email chocolate. so you'll just have to live with the good intention hugs The Minstrel |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Gary T Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:16 AM Hope it goes well, Catrin. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: bbelle Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:17 AM Patrish ... I despise "busywork" ... and it takes too much energy that could be better expended elsewhere. I go through the same emotions every October 12 ... the day my grandmother passed away ... and I try to remember all the good things. moonchild |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Catrin Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:20 AM Patrish, I can identify completely with what you've just said. It can be so undermining to be asked to re-do something just for the sake of doing it. Where I work, the management structure is changing so we are in an extremely quiet 'between projects' stage. Its driving me mad. Keep yer chin up. Catrin |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Peter T. Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:22 AM Consider Patrish that you have already helped many other people this morning goof off and not do what they are supposed to do either (including me). Think of it as your public service of the day. When people say to you, Patrish, what did you do today, you lazy bum? you can say, I selflessly helped others. Not a bad legacy. And in North America the day is barely beginning. As Gordon Bok says, The world is always turning over and going back to sleep. yours, Peter T. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Allan C. Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:33 AM The thing that keeps me going through such such times is my plans for the future. If you create a plan for something - no matter if it is even a year or so away - (I am currently planning my trip to the UK next year!). This helps to give perspective to the stuff I have always called "monkeywork" - repetitive stuff which requires little or no brainpower to accomplish. While I am doing that crap, I can be thinking about the details of my plan. What's your plan? That's a rhetorical question - no answer required. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Allan C. Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:45 AM P.S. It was the Mudcat Adventure that kept me going last year and the early part of this one! |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Alice Date: 31 Jul 00 - 10:57 AM |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: SINSULL Date: 31 Jul 00 - 11:01 AM ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDUM
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Alice Date: 31 Jul 00 - 11:07 AM Sorry, I meant to click "forum home" and I hit submit instead. I was thinking about the ten hours a week I spend working for a horticulture design company. Those hours give me some base money to count on, since the rest of my work is freelance uncertainty. I spend alot of that time dusting the leaves on plants. My brain could have gone to mush long ago doing that work, but now I just seem to do it on automatic pilot. Sometimes I listen to talk radio or music on earphones, but often I just think about plans like Allan described. I memorize lyrics, I conceptualize work I can do when the plant care is over. The heart of what you are feeling from your first message is the loss of your mom. Even if your work were really interesting, that loss would be there. I understand. It's been 21 years this July 19th since I lost my parents. It still hurts, but with time the scar fades. Hang in there. We're pullin' for you. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 31 Jul 00 - 11:13 AM I am smiling, thanks for the Mrs Doyle, goan goan goan, and thanks for the e-chocolate. My Mum would be cross with me for being so maudlin. But you know you only have one mum and its like the Joni Mitchell classic "you dont know what you've got till its gone" Its that unconditional thing I feel is gone. And Peter T. I have done most of the work under great although(apart from here)silent protest. Its not quite finished but the worst is over Moonchild: the good times are all I remember, but memories are not physical I just wish I could have her back for twenty minutes to hug and catch up on all the stuff that has happened, and tell her again how much I love her and miss her Patrish |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: The Shambles Date: 31 Jul 00 - 12:25 PM I have no idea if this will help but I was reminded of a radio programme I heard this week-end.
They were interviewing female crew members of two navy vessels. They we asked if they would like to see all-female crews. They said not, as even now after a while together as a group, that they all tended to have their monthly cycles at the same time. They felt that if the crew was all-female that it would be difficult to 'lift' themselves at certain times and that the running of the ships would suffer….. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Roger in Sheffield Date: 31 Jul 00 - 12:46 PM Hey Patrish it does get better My mother died two days before my birthday which was also nine days before Christmas Day. For several years after that Christmas and Birthdays were never the same. Eight years on it is not so traumatic, the loss is still there but its easier to remember the good times now. I will leave some money with Linda to buy you a stiff drink next time you are at the Harlequin Roger |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: CarolC Date: 31 Jul 00 - 12:48 PM Patrish- I'm sorry about your mother. Those kinds of aniversaries are always tough. I hope you feel better soon. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Kim C Date: 31 Jul 00 - 01:12 PM well, I am at work WAITING for someone to hand in their materials for the board meeting (which is tomorrow), that they were supposed to give me LAST WEEK! So here I sit, answering the phone while the receptionist is out. Tomorrow I will be scampering about like a headless chicken trying to get ready. My job is like, a lot to do at once, or nothing to do at all. So I guess it all evens out. Patrish, I had a terrible scare last week when I heard a news report that a soldier had been killed at our local army base.... I have a dear friend there and of course they were giving no details at first, and I wasn't able to phone him, consequently I was literally sick with worry for about 24 hours until I knew for sure it wasn't him. So I know about wallowing and worrying and not getting anything done. But all is better today, and would be better still if people would just turn in their stuff on time!!!!!!!1 :):):):):) |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread From: GUEST,Mickey191 Date: 31 Jul 00 - 01:40 PM Patrish, you said you wish you could have her back for 20 minutes so you could tell her how much you love her. Honey she KNOWS-don't doubt it. My favorite saying with regards to ups and downs of life - "Some days it's chicken,some days it's feathers.'Take care. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: GUEST Date: 31 Jul 00 - 01:41 PM Don't know where you are but in my neck of the woods the Monday apathy is almost over....if you still have some workday left, may I suggest you beg off sick and rent a movie, say....Night On Earth. Five stories about the human condition as seen through the eyes of cab drivers that will make you cry, laugh, and believe again in improbable ideals such as the inherent goodness of people. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: GUEST,Arkie Date: 31 Jul 00 - 01:53 PM This won't help with the grieving part, except to take your mind off it for about three minutes, but applicable to the rest. Find Stan Rogers' recording of the Mary Ellen Carter. Hey! anything by Stan Rogers should help. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Les B Date: 31 Jul 00 - 02:07 PM I've been kind of blue today because, after being on unemployment for five months, I'm starting back to work tommorrow at the same job. New bosses, hopefully new ball game. But I really enjoyed the time off, and am pissed that I haven't figured out how to retire and toodle about in an RV like all my grown-up friends. But, GUEST, your mention of "Night on Earth" and the hilarious scene of Roberto Benigini describing his love life with a sheep to an incredulous priest made me laugh out loud. Thanks. The day looks way better !$! |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Joe Offer Date: 31 Jul 00 - 04:53 PM Well, Patrish, Doctor Joe prescribes pizza and beer. As long as there's pizza and beer, this world is a pretty darn good place to live in. In fact, I think I'll have some right now. Won't cure all the evils of the world, but it sure tastes good. -Joe Offer- |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Megan L Date: 31 Jul 00 - 05:17 PM Patrish havent got time to read all just now so I hope I'm not double banking. Don't feel bad about posting, if we can't be here for one another what is the point of being here at all. About mothers day a few of us were having a sad think back day but there were others who understood and came in with lots of love and support. I had a friend who used to say "walk kindly on our memories someday one of us won't be here to replant them." He was right (as always) but the memories we planted together have become a fragrent garden where we never have to be parted or meet in sadness. As for the work keep your head below the parapet and your eyes sharp, you never know when a new oppertunity may present itself. M. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Bill D Date: 31 Jul 00 - 07:32 PM well, I'm sure Patrish is over it and gone home by now, but here is a sone to sing when you need some...ummm...'uplifting'..*smile* |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Bill D Date: 31 Jul 00 - 07:36 PM whoops...here...Eensie-weensie spider |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 01 Aug 00 - 09:32 AM Many thanks to all for your support, yesterday was one of those days, but as you said "it will pass" and it did. Its wierd really cos if what had happened today had happened yesterday I think I may have had the men in white coats coming to take me away. I have had a confrontation with a colleague and Yorkshire Electricity have dug up my front garden uprooting all my mature bushes leaving a trench 2ft by 12ft. But they let my 8 year lod play on their digger - so you have to smile... thanks Patrish |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Kim C Date: 01 Aug 00 - 11:31 AM Pizza and beer sounds good. I also like to let loose with a good yodel (gets the lungs working). Not to mention, I have always thought a new lipstick can give you a new outlook on things. :) |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Morticia Date: 01 Aug 00 - 01:59 PM Patrish, I have a really good computer programme that allows you to smash the screen with a hammer, or cover it in paint or have it eaten by ants...... until you feel better......send me your e-mail and i'll send it to you, guarenteed to raise a smile on the most hellish of days. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Gervase Date: 01 Aug 00 - 02:14 PM Glad to hear you're back on song. And -strange as it may seem - it's probably good news that Yorkshire Electricity is wrecking your lawn... Seriously, I've always found that, no matter how low or pissed off I felt, one of our fine utilities (be it gas, leccy, water or whatever) could wind me up to such a foaming frenzy over such piddling issues that no matter what disaster had cast me down, I cheered up when I thought what total w***ers they were! Problem always was, though, that the chaps actually doing the job (the ones who needed a pint of tea an hour) were really nice blokes, so I had to address all my invective to the poor faceless sod in the main office at the other end of a phone. Thankfully, I never got to meet him. Nevertheless, I'm sure that he (the sod) was a prototypical example of an artificial agent - an early "intelligent engine", only really, really stupid! |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Roger in Sheffield Date: 01 Aug 00 - 03:18 PM Morticia can I have them ants if Patrish don't want them??????? Roger |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Bernard Date: 01 Aug 00 - 03:25 PM Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and other days the statue... |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Bernard Date: 01 Aug 00 - 03:25 PM Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and other days the statue... |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Bernard Date: 01 Aug 00 - 03:31 PM Ooops! I have detected a malfunction! |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: catspaw49 Date: 01 Aug 00 - 04:18 PM Yeah Bernard....Today you seem to be the statue! Hey Morty!!! Kat sent me that and I'm having a blast (of flame) and a smashing, ripping good time!!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Allan C. Date: 01 Aug 00 - 04:59 PM I don't know who (it might have been me) first said this: Troubles are like watermelon seeds. They will pass. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Morticia Date: 01 Aug 00 - 06:41 PM It's great, Uncle Pat,isn't it? Rog, just send me your e-mail and I'll pass it along...I think of it as doing my bit for stress management in the 21st century. |
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Subject: RE: Starting a thread cos I'm fed up From: Bernard Date: 01 Aug 00 - 07:13 PM Believe me, I'm nearly always the statue. And why is it when I'm the pigeon I get constipation? |
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