Song Challenge! Part 37

Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 09:15 AM

It may just be the 'dog days of summer' affecting my brain cells, but I thought this little news story was a grand idea for a Song Challenge! Or maybe it was the recent Republican party convention in Philly that set me to thinking . . . even monsters could use a good theme song (and perhaps a political platform) . . .

There Are More Things In Heaven And Earth, Horatio . . . From creatures of the deep to massive mountain monsters, legends of shy prehistoric forms of wildlife persist throughout European culture and history. But now Norway has a rival to the famed Loch Ness monster of Scotland -- "Selma," a fabled serpent which has caught the attention of an international team of monster hunters. Reports of a beast in the lake first surfaced around 1750, and most accounts agree it looks like a serpent with the head of an elk or a horse. A giant trap for catching the creature, reputed to be a cousin of 'Nessie', has been set up in a lake in south Norway.

The 18-foot (6m) long tube-shaped trap, comprising a metal frame with nylon netting, is set to be lowered into Seljord lake in south Norway and will contain live fish for bait to catch "Selma." Over the next two weeks, the team will dangle the cage in the lake, near where sightings of the monster have been reported.

The latest attempt to catch Nessie's Norwegian cousin follows other sightings in Scandinavian countries. Swedish monster spotters have been kept busy in recent years with a rush of stories about a similar strain of serpent. Five years ago, a new legend was born in Lake Van, Turkey. Authorities recorded witness accounts of a monster-like dinosaur in the country's largest lake. And across the Atlantic, Canada has its own version of the mystery, the Ogopogo.

Sightings and claims of proof of inexplicable beings are most frequent in the United States. There, expanding archives of films, photographs and now Web sites attempt to prove the existence of an array of fantastic wildlife. But perhaps a lesson to nonbelievers comes from the South Pacific, where a giant race of squid, mythologized for centuries, turned out to be real. After remaining elusive for many years, more and more of the creatures, some measuring more than 60 feet long, are being caught by fishermen off Australia and New Zeland.

Go for it, Challenge!rs!!!

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: MMario
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 09:48 AM

for some inspiration - re: a relative, see this thread

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: GUEST,Fibula Mattock
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 09:51 AM

Okay, this is my first attempt at something like this, and really I should be working, but hey...
"You may sing of mountain monsters and of creatures of the deep
With tales to frighten children when they will not go to sleep
The Seljord Lake has Selma and there's serpents up in Sweden
And a mighty snake is said to guard an apple tree in Eden
But laugh no more! The tales are true, and I'll be more specific
They've found a race of giant squid down in the South Pacific..."

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 10:03 AM

Fantastic beginning there, Fibula!! Keep going, it looks like you've got a great song in the making!!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: MMario
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 10:06 AM

what a great start! Any suggestions for a tune? Do you think you may come up with more verses?

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: GUEST,Fibula Mattock
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 10:29 AM

I haven't thought of a tune for it, but maybe there's something out there it'll fit.
I'll try and continue it in between the glances-of-death I'm getting from my boss...

...Fib

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: MMario
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 11:25 AM

no rush.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: wysiwyg
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 02:23 PM

Well, if you get fired, Fib, you can Mudcat full time!

Be careful. And see if you get a chance to get your boss Mudcat-addicted somehow, make life easier in general!

~S~

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Dharmabum
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 09:47 PM

THE CRYPTOZOOLOGISTS LAMENT

{sung to Northwest Passage,[Stan Rogers]

{chorus}

If for just one time I could see the Loch Ness Monster,

Or maybe catch a glimpse of Selma in that Norway lake,

Tracking one good lead to the beast so wild & savage,

And have it turn out not to be a fake.

From Australia onto Scotland I've gone in search of lore,

From Bunyips to the Loch Ness spotted on the distant shore,

I've chased Bigfoot thru the mountains to the bay of Chesapeake,

For a chance at fame & fortune is all I ever seek.

{chorus}

From Brazillian Chupacabra to the depths of Lake Erie,

Where South Bay Bessie's said to dwell tho elusive she may be,

And I've yet to prove the Yeti to be a he or she,

Yes tracking hominid creatures has been the life for me.

{chorus}

I've searched the world over with camera in my hand,

The wife & kids have turned on me they just don't understand,

My wife says I don't love her she says it isn't fair,

But she'll be happy when I'm back as a millionaire.

{chorus}

Now the time has come for me to pack my bag & go,

To find the abominable man who's made of snow,

This is the one I know it this is the one that's real,

He's been spotted in a UFO with Elvis at the wheel.

If for just one time I could see the Loch Ness Monster,

Or catch a glimpse of Selma in that Norway lake,

Just one good lead to that beast so wild & savage,

And have it turn out not to be a fake.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: GUEST,Jeff Emmett
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 10:14 PM

I may be new here, but I don't understand what a story about a monster has to do with the Republican National Convention. Are you saying that Republicans are monsters without a political platform, and that is what prompted this songwriting contest?

I know there are a lot of democrats here. I've read the Gore/Lieberman thread, and that's cool. But I am offended to come here and have my politics bashed in the context of a songwriting challenge. It isn't necessary.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 11:38 PM

Dear Jeff,

I don't really know how to respond to you're being offended by the Song Challenge! If you'll check out the Song Challenge!s From The Past page, you'll see that I'm an equal opportunity offender . . . This week, it just happened that the Republicans had their convention, that's all. And why shouldn't monsters have their own party and platform? Even if they're mostly 50 feet tall and more powerful than a locomotive??

You see, Jeff, what I was going for was humour and irony -- nothing too offensive there, what? If the Dems had been first with their balloons and bullshit, I would have used that party's name in vain. So there ya go, and don't take anything on a Song Challenge! too seriously, OK? 'Cuz frankly, I don't give two hoots how ya vote, just whether you can write a good song!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 08 Aug 00 - 11:43 PM

Sorry about not saying anything about your WONDERFUL!! song, Dharmabum -- got a little distracted by wee Jeff there --

Once again, my darlin', you have proven yourself a Master Mudcatter of Verse and Versatility!! And just for you, here's two kisses on each cheek (!!), AND a Silver B.L.O.B. for your ENTIRE song. Well done, Master D.!!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Dharmabum
Date: 09 Aug 00 - 08:05 AM

Thanks Aine{blushing}. I thought for a minute it was something I had said that had pissed off our new found friend of the republican persuasion. Welcome Jeff,Rule# 1,Don't take anything here at Mudcat too seriously. Rule#2,Refer to rule #1.

Ron. whocouldn'tcarelesswhatpoliticalpartyyouchoosetorunwith.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: GUEST,Jeff Emmett
Date: 09 Aug 00 - 01:20 PM

Aine,

I am not offended by your song challenge present or past. I have been impressed with the creations by 'catters. Example in point, both by Dharmabum and Fibula in this thread!

The use of humor, jokes, irony are not offensive unless at the expense of someone or some group. I felt that my political party had been baited ["maybe it was the recent Republican party convention in Philly that set me to thinking . . . even monsters could use a good theme song (and perhaps a political platform)"], much as another 'catter has expressed recently that s/he felt her religion Christianity has been targeted. In clarification, that's all I will say here with an apology for distracting from the brilliant songwriting.

Thank you Dharmabum for the welcome and advise.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 09 Aug 00 - 01:35 PM

Dear Jeff,

Wonderful to hear that! Now, why don't you go and write the Monsters' Convention Song -- you could even base it on the entertaining antics of the Reform Party conventioneers this week! (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). Who would be the winning candidate - Selma or Big Foot?? Go for it, Jeff!!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Bradypus
Date: 10 Aug 00 - 07:27 PM

A few years ago, a monster was 'spotted' in Loch Morar, one of Scotland's sea lochs. (The monster was called Morag, naturally enough) This gave rise to the following:

Said Nessie, the monster we know
"I must not stay too long below
I hear there's a horror
Who lives in Loch Morrar
Who's muscling in on my show"

Morag's existence may have influenced 'Nessie' in verse 3 of the following ...

The Monster's Love Song

By yon bonnie banks
Of Loch Ness, dark and deep
Where the monster is seen only rarely
You may hear a lonely tune
If you wander by the moon
And you listen in the morning so early

chorus
O Selma my dear one, Selma my loved one
Selma, O how I adore ye
Though it's centuries since we met
I will never more forget
For you've got a strong love spell o'er me

Back in prehistoric days
Back before the last ice age
We would meet in the North Sea water
But then Sweden called you home
And to Scotland I'd return
Now I'm pining for Seljord Lake's daughter

They say Nessie is my name
But it seems a crying shame
To gie a lassie's name tae me, sae braw and handsome
Lassie's names wi' monsters gang
Be it richt or be it wrang –
Except for the Abominable Snowman

I've been listenin' out for news
Folks are now expressin' views
And they think that the sea level's rising
In a century or two
I'll come swimmin' o'er to you
And the waves we'll make, now that will be surprising

Final Chorus
When monster meets monster
And kisses her and hugs her
They brew up a regular tsunami
What a storm in Seljord's lake
When we both the surface break
O Selma, my dear, I'll come tae ye.

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Bradypus
Date: 10 Aug 00 - 07:51 PM

Dharmabum - I forgot to say I enjoyed the cryptozoologist. A good tune, and well researched (unless its autobiographical ???

Bradypus

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Dharmabum
Date: 10 Aug 00 - 08:03 PM

Thanks Brady,glad you came out to play. This playground was getting a little lonesome here all by meself.

Exelent song.

Ron. {no}

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: MMario
Date: 11 Aug 00 - 08:47 AM

Sorry guys, no inspiration has hit. I think I used up my "loch monster" idea with the monster of Loch Moose

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 11 Aug 00 - 08:52 AM

Dear Bradypus,

That's a wunnerful wee love song! I was hoping one of my Challenge!rs would wax romantic for this one. Here's a Silver B.L.O.B. for:

In a century or two
I'll come swimmin' o'er to you
And the waves we'll make, now that will be surprising

I'm having trouble finding my muse these days, too. It's just too dang hot here to think very hard. But, I'm gonna keep trying to find just the right words for this Challenge!

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 14 Aug 00 - 08:53 AM

refreshing . . . the thread, that is . . .

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Bradypus
Date: 15 Aug 00 - 03:34 AM

I'm really too busy to do another one this week - can anyone do someting with

Selma the Swedish monster Had a ....

Bradypus

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: MMario
Date: 15 Aug 00 - 09:20 AM

...very kinky tail
And if you ever saw it
you would shout and shriek and wail

all of the other monsters...

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Dharmabum
Date: 15 Aug 00 - 10:02 AM

All of the other monsters,

Had a contest in the fall,

To see wich of the family,

Was the scariest of all.

Then one stormy.......

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: hesperis
Date: 15 Aug 00 - 12:02 PM

then one stormy hallows eve
a specter came to say
"That one with the tail kinky
she's the one to make 'em flee!"

then all the monsters hollered
and they shouted evilly
Selma, the swedish monster,
Selma is the most scary!


I'm not happy with the last bit... too simple maybe? I want another twist.

Someone else take it

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Bradypus
Date: 15 Aug 00 - 06:41 PM

... Or just to continue the story ...

Selma the Swedish monster
Surfaced from the lake so deep
Let out a monster belch and
Woke the natives from their sleep

(so what do the Swedes do next ??)

Bradypus

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Bradypus
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 05:08 PM

Refresh - we have an unfinished challenge, and an unfinished song

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: MMario
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 05:20 PM

Then the Swedes got torches bright
bonfires lit the night
And when the coals were red and hot
They roasted Selma on the spot!

with sauces made out of mustard
and a pint of something stout
after they ate poor Selma
Them Swedes done pissed the fires out

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Bradypus
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 06:16 PM

That would seem to finish the song, at least ...

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Amergin
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 06:18 PM

I'll do a song later....have been busy...

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 18 Aug 00 - 06:29 PM

Hey you faithful Challenge!rs!! First, I'd like to say a great big THANK YOU! to Bradypus, Dharmabum, herperis, and MMario for keeping the home fires burning (hahahaha) and this Challenge! alive. Y'all done good, real good. And I hope that we'll see some offerings from the other Challenge!rs out there before we're done.

Here's my wee offering to the cause. This song just shows to go ya that if you look close enough(!), you can always find a logical explanation for anything . . .

-- Áine

Nessie's Revenge
(Tune: Red River Valley)

In your loch they are setting the traps, dear
With the freshest of fish as the bait
But they're fools if they think you will show, dear
And with cold tea and scones they will wait

When I first heard the news, I was worried
They wouldn't find your sweet snout and bright tail
For they don't know your sly, clever ways, dear
And like me, I'm afraid that they will fail

It's been three centuries since you left me
And you took your lovely scales to Norway
Here in Scotland I float on my lonesome
Thinking of our long ago wedding day

I didn't think you'd be mad when I mentioned
That your head reminded me of a horse
When I returned with my gift of fresh sprat, dear
You'd fled even without a kiss, of course

They say trouble comes in threes, and I believe them
Wife One is in Canada, Two's in Turkey
I never thought that I'd be a three-time loser
Is it my breath or just something about me?

In their hunt, I wish those humans all the best, dear
With their sardines and their nets may they succeed
For it's a sex experiment they've got in mind, dear
And if you're caught, they'll bring you straight back home to me

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Áine
Date: 19 Aug 00 - 02:47 PM

Alrightey then -- This Challenge! has been up for 11 days, so I think it's about time to head 'em up and move 'em out, y'all. Besides, I think the next Challenge! will cool us all off (hehehehehe)...

Congrats, Cudos, Thanks and Well Done to each and every Challenge!r who conspired and created the few, but very worthy, number of songs this time:

Winners of the Golden Cow Chip Award with Guinness Crest:
The Cryptozoologists Lament by Dharmabum
The Monster's Love Song by Bradypus
Selma The Swedish Monster by Bradypus, MMario, Dharmabum and hesperis

Pat yourselves on the back(s) and keep your eyes peeled for the Challenge! Part 39 which is slowly approaching . . .

-- Áine

Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! Part 37
From: Aidan Crossey
Date: 04 Sep 01 - 10:14 AM

This is to the tiune of "Seven Deadly Sins" as performed in the old days by the Dubliners (a relation of the hornpipe, The Cuckoo's Nest)
TWENTY THOUSAND SCIENTISTS
Now some say there's huge creatures lurking
In the forests and down in the deep
I think it's their brains overworking
Or else they're in need of more sleep
For twenty thousand scientists
Have fine-tooth-combed Loch Ness
Their attempts to find a monster
Haven't met with much success
With their sonar and their radar
Gamma rays and infra red
The only end result
Their gadget budget's in the red

There are creatures of every persuasion
If we're to believe what we hear
In the woods, in the mountains and oceans
They are roaming the earth far and near
But twenty thousand scientists
Have climbed Mount Everest
With their efforts to find a yeti
I'm not that much impressed
With their sonar and their radar
Gamma rays and infra red
The only end result
Their gadget budget's in the red

Pictures are blurred or too distant
And prove neither this thing nor that
Please feel free to believe their existence
(And insist that the world is still flat)
For twenty thousand scientists
Have trawled Canadian woods
And none have yet returned
With proof of Sasquatch or Bigfoot
With their sonar and their radar
Gamma rays and infra red
The only end result
Their gadget budget's in the red