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JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!

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JOCK STEWART
MULDOON, THE SOLID MAN


Related threads:
The Famous Muldoon/Reedy Lagoon (18) (closed)
Lyr Req: Muldoon, The Solid Man (37)
Lyr Req: I'm a Man You Don't Meet Everyday (22)
There goes Muldoon he's a solid man (16)
(origins) Origin: (I'm) A Man You Don't Meet Every Day (71)
Origins: Jock Stewart-Man You Don't Meet Every Day (19)
Lyr Req: A Man You Don't Meet Every Day (5) (closed)
Lyr Req: A Man You Don't Meet Every Day (Pogues) (16)
A man you don't meet every day (9) (closed)


Max Tone 04 Nov 00 - 05:28 PM
Thyme2dream 05 Nov 00 - 01:25 AM
Thyme2dream 05 Nov 00 - 01:31 AM
Calach 05 Nov 00 - 05:11 AM
jeffp 05 Nov 00 - 09:55 AM
little john cameron 05 Nov 00 - 11:27 AM
GUEST,Bruce O. 05 Nov 00 - 02:25 PM
Liz the Squeak 05 Nov 00 - 03:05 PM
Max Tone 07 Nov 00 - 05:56 PM
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Subject: Lyr Add: JIM McDIRGE (parody of Jock Stewart)
From: Max Tone
Date: 04 Nov 00 - 05:28 PM

I really must stop these puerile parodies; but I keep coming across the same character, in different clothes, at different sessions, murdering different songs, be it Athenry, No man's land, Yellow on the Broom, W.M.Thyme, Star o' the C.D., etc.

JIM McDIRGE

Copyright 31/10/00, Rob Maxtone Graham.

Now, his name's Jim McDirge,
He can nae haud a tune,
An' a dronin' auld sang he will air.

So be canny and leave,
When he starts up his wheeze;
He's a man tae avoid onywhere.

Wi' his acres o' lard,
He thinks he's a Bard,
But his beer gut, it reaches the flair.

He says "Come a' ye,
sing Jock Stewart wi' me;
It's easy - I'll show ye first"

Well he wails wi' pure doom,
An' ye hope tha' richt soon,
He'll struggle tae find the next verse.

Sae ye tak oot yer gun,
And say "Sing just one
mair line o' tha', if ye dare!"

But he carries on gaun,
First faster, then slowin'
An' things go frae bad tae worse.

Sae come powder yer charge;
Number 6 shot hits hard.
Jim McDirge, yer gaun hame in a hearse.

Rob


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: Thyme2dream
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 01:25 AM

~'twould be me, giggling again..good job maxT!


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: Thyme2dream
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 01:31 AM

I'm trying to get Ian (Calach) to finish his tourist parody song sung to the tune of 'Scotland the Brave'...it's started out rather grand, but I think he forgot all about it this week preparing for his two gigs.


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Subject: Lyr Add: THE PANDA (parody of The Road to Dundee)
From: Calach
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 05:11 AM

Nice one Rob, here's one I posted a while back.
To the Tune of "The Roads and the miles to Dundee."

THE PANDA
Hall/Tait

Cold Winter was howling, and the Panda was growling,
He was wandering the streets cause the pubs had all closed.
Up came a wee lassie, and said "Mr Panda,
Would you like to come with me, your nose is all frozed?"

She was dressed like a hooker, but still quite a looker,
But the high heels and lipstick, they gave it away.
But the Panda went with her, cause his body was shivering'
And he needed some food and a warm place to stay.

They walked back together, in the cold wintry weather.
She took him upstairs to her well-used address.
She asked what he wanted, as she cuddled the Panda
And he went up to bed with his little temptress.

Although now he was warm, he couldn't perform
He needed some food, he'd not eaten all day.
She cooked him some fried rice, bamboo shoots and bean sprouts,
Some nice lemon chicken and a chocolate soufflé

From the table they rose, and he took off her clothes,
Made love all night long, till the first break of dawn.
Then he got out of bed, and he said to the lassie,
"So long to you darling, I now must be gone."

Says she, "No my honey, you owe me some money.
It's required for my living; for a prostitute I be."
"But I am a Panda, and I don't pay for loving,
We'll solve our dispute with a dictionary."

They looked at the book, for the meaning of hooker,
"A girl paid for loving, who never conceives."
Her threw her the book and she read with amazement
All it said about Pandas was "Eats shoots and leaves."


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: jeffp
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 09:55 AM

Very fine, Calach! A nice treatment of the panda joke.

jeffp


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: little john cameron
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 11:27 AM

Great stuff guys, ljc


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: GUEST,Bruce O.
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 02:25 PM

Jock Stewart had little to do with the song. On the Bodley Ballads website (in Mudcat's Links) is a 19th century copy, "I'm the man you don't meet every day", Harding B 11(1734). It's Roud #975, and traditional versions, some moderately revised, have been collected in English speaking countries worldwide.


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 05 Nov 00 - 03:05 PM

LOVE IT!!!!!

Wish I could send it to the bloke who would come to our folk club and sing this every sodding week!!!! (Un)fortunately I don't know where he is.....

LTS


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Subject: RE: JOCK STEWART - Oh, NO, another Parody!
From: Max Tone
Date: 07 Nov 00 - 05:56 PM

Stormer, Calach,
What's next on our menus?

GUEST - Bruce -- De ye nae mean Scoats speakin' kintras? If Jock Stewart was a Sassenach, I'll gie up screivin'.
Rob


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