Songs about getting older: 'THE FINAL FRONTIER'

Subject: RE: Getting older: 'THE FINAL FRONTIER'
From: GUEST,Z
Date: 21 Oct 10 - 08:28 PM

"A Grave Situation" was composed by Aussie poet Claude Morris, which carries the same theme as "Ivor the Driver" by Dave Goulder, of which the lyrics appear elsewhere on this site...

Subject: Over and under the ground
From: Alice
Date: 14 Nov 00 - 11:19 PM

reviving (ha) this from '97. Anyone know "Over And Under The Ground"? If it isn't added here, I may start a Lyr Req thread.

Alice

Subject: Lyr Add: A GRAVE SITUATION ^^
From: Alan of Australia
Date: 12 Oct 97 - 11:08 AM

Here's a poem well known in Oz:-

A GRAVE SITUATION
Anonymous

When I staggered away from my favourite pub
The night was dark and still.
So I thought I'd take a short cut home
That led over cemetery hill.

Now I'm no hero as everyone knows
And I've got no reckless trends
But ghosts and the like well they leave me cold
As it were. Though spirits and I are old friends.

I wobbled along through the cemetery gates
Begging my legs to behave
And everything went pretty well so I thought
Till I fell down a newly dug grave.

For a moment I thought I'd landed in hell
And ended my earthly career
I sniffed like a hound for those sulphurous fumes
Expecting old Nick to appear.

But reason returned and I staggered erect
My prison so dark to survey
And I tested my bones for a fracture or two
But everything functioned okay.

I made a feeble attempt to get out
But I needed no more than a glance
To convince me in my condition
I hadn't a ghost of a chance.

I reckoned I'd have to lay off for a while
And when I woke sober and fit
I'd surely come up with a good idea
That would get me out of the pit.

But just then I could hear fast oncoming steps
It seemed too good to be true.
But before I could shout cooee or offer advice
In the grave there were suddenly two.

By chance he fell at the grave's other end
With no-one to cushion his fall
But up he rose with a strangled yelp
And attempted to scale up the wall.

This chap was at pains to be up and away
As the capers he cut plainly told.
He jumped and scrambled and he jumped again
But his fingers and toes wouldn't hold.

I hadn't yet spoken - well I'd hardly a chance
The way he cavorted about.
And I had to admire the way that he fought
To sever all ties and get out.

Of course he believed there was nobody near
He thought he was there all alone.
And I got the idea it had entered his head
That the grave was becoming his own.

I felt rather sad for the poor little bloke
Now acting a little distraught.
I thought he'd relax if I gave him the drum
That he wasn't alone as he thought.

So I walked up behind him and tapped on his back
As he paused for another wild bid
You can't make it mate I breathed in his lug
But by the lord Harry he did.

Cheers,
Alan^^

Subject: RE: Getting older:
From: Frank in the swamps
Date: 12 Oct 97 - 07:03 AM

Alice,

No, but it reminded me of a joke about a drunk who fell into a fresh dug grave and couldn't climb out up the muddy sides. When another drunk fell in in the middle of the moonless night, the first watched him try to clamber out for a few minutes and then said "You'll never get out of here". And that's when he did.

Frank I.T.S.

Subject: RE: Getting older:
From: Alice
Date: 09 Oct 97 - 04:49 PM

A few months back I heard someone sing a song at a gathering that I can't find in the database. It was about a gravedigger at night and a drunk who fell into the open grave. I think the chorus was something like..."over the ground, and under the ground, over and under the ground". Does anyone recognize this one? Alice

[IVOR THE DRIVER by Dave Goulder]

Subject: RE: Getting older:
From: Joe Offer
Date: 09 Oct 97 - 03:11 PM

Say, Bert - take a look at the database version and see if it triggers your memory. I like your version better, and I'd like to know the rest of it. I think the Clancys cleaned the song up a bit for the American audience.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Getting older:
From: Bert
Date: 09 Oct 97 - 12:53 PM

Joe, Thanks, I didn't even look for it. Here's the version that I know....

Last night I dreamt that I was bloomin' well dead
As I went to me funeral I bloomin' well said
Look at the coffin, bloomin' great handles
Ain't it grand, to be blooming well dead
Look at the altar, blooming great candles
Ain't it grand, to be blooming well dead

I felt so happy to think that I'd popped off
I said to a bloke with a nasty hacking cough
Look at the flowers, blooming great orchids,
Ain't it grand, to be blooming well dead
Look at the black hearse, blooming great 'orses
Ain't it grand, to be blooming well dead

There was another verse or two that I don't remember, something about "look at the Missus, blooming well cryin'"

Subject: RE: Getting older:
From: Joe Offer
Date: 09 Oct 97 - 01:49 AM

Hi, Bert - the one song is in the database with the title "Isn't It Grand." The Clancy Brothers recorded it with that name. Good song, isn't it?
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: Getting older:
From: Peter T.
Date: 08 Oct 97 - 06:35 PM

That reminds me of a song, of which I can only remember one line, about being reunited with one's teeth in heaven. It may have been a distant parody of the Eric Clapton song, Tears in Heaven, but I think it was much older. Yours, Peter

Subject: Getting older:
From: Bert
Date: 08 Oct 97 - 05:09 PM

Taking this getting older stuff to extremes there's

"Ain't It Grand to be Bloomin' Well Dead?"

And Johnny & June Carter Cash did a beautiful song "(I'll be waiting on the) Far Side Banks of Jordan"

[Some song titles in this thread have been converted to links by a Mudelf.]