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BS: Tavern Rites of Spring

Lonesome EJ 20 Mar 01 - 02:22 PM
SINSULL 20 Mar 01 - 02:28 PM
Allan C. 20 Mar 01 - 02:44 PM
GUEST,Roger the skiffler 20 Mar 01 - 02:45 PM
MMario 20 Mar 01 - 02:53 PM
Allan C. 20 Mar 01 - 02:56 PM
Lonesome EJ 20 Mar 01 - 03:02 PM
Kim C 20 Mar 01 - 03:05 PM
Bert 20 Mar 01 - 03:08 PM
Amergin 20 Mar 01 - 03:10 PM
Lonesome EJ 20 Mar 01 - 03:17 PM
SINSULL 20 Mar 01 - 03:29 PM
Hollowfox 20 Mar 01 - 03:30 PM
SINSULL 20 Mar 01 - 03:34 PM
Noreen 20 Mar 01 - 03:38 PM
MMario 20 Mar 01 - 03:40 PM
Lonesome EJ 20 Mar 01 - 03:54 PM
GUEST,GUEST Chester 20 Mar 01 - 03:57 PM
SINSULL 20 Mar 01 - 04:03 PM
Amergin 20 Mar 01 - 04:05 PM
AllisonA(Animaterra) 20 Mar 01 - 04:22 PM
SINSULL 20 Mar 01 - 04:35 PM
Morticia 20 Mar 01 - 05:20 PM
Kim C 20 Mar 01 - 05:26 PM
Matt_R 20 Mar 01 - 05:35 PM
Bert 20 Mar 01 - 05:42 PM
gnu 20 Mar 01 - 05:53 PM
SINSULL 20 Mar 01 - 08:52 PM
AllisonA(Animaterra) 20 Mar 01 - 10:08 PM
hesperis 20 Mar 01 - 10:34 PM
Lonesome EJ 20 Mar 01 - 10:38 PM
alison 20 Mar 01 - 10:52 PM
Lonesome EJ 20 Mar 01 - 10:58 PM
Amos 20 Mar 01 - 11:46 PM
Matt_R 20 Mar 01 - 11:52 PM
Big Mick 21 Mar 01 - 12:34 AM
Peg 21 Mar 01 - 01:50 AM
alison 21 Mar 01 - 06:53 AM
Noreen 21 Mar 01 - 07:53 AM
SINSULL 21 Mar 01 - 08:52 AM
GUEST,Roger the skiffler 21 Mar 01 - 08:59 AM
Jeri 21 Mar 01 - 09:23 AM
Allan C. 21 Mar 01 - 11:15 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 21 Mar 01 - 11:21 AM
MMario 21 Mar 01 - 11:41 AM
SINSULL 21 Mar 01 - 11:43 AM
Morticia 21 Mar 01 - 02:37 PM
SINSULL 21 Mar 01 - 03:02 PM
SINSULL 21 Mar 01 - 04:03 PM
Matt_R 21 Mar 01 - 04:18 PM
SINSULL 21 Mar 01 - 04:21 PM
Allan C. 21 Mar 01 - 04:22 PM
Amos 21 Mar 01 - 04:28 PM
SINSULL 21 Mar 01 - 04:31 PM
Matt_R 21 Mar 01 - 04:31 PM
Hollowfox 21 Mar 01 - 06:33 PM
Micca 21 Mar 01 - 07:36 PM
hesperis 21 Mar 01 - 07:48 PM
alison 21 Mar 01 - 08:17 PM
Lonesome EJ 21 Mar 01 - 11:43 PM
alison 22 Mar 01 - 12:00 AM
hesperis 22 Mar 01 - 12:24 AM
Matt_R 22 Mar 01 - 12:39 AM
GUEST,micca at work 22 Mar 01 - 07:32 AM
alison 22 Mar 01 - 09:31 AM
SINSULL 22 Mar 01 - 09:38 AM
alison 22 Mar 01 - 09:46 AM
SINSULL 22 Mar 01 - 09:55 AM
GUEST 22 Mar 01 - 11:18 AM
SINSULL 22 Mar 01 - 11:39 AM
GUEST,Crocus Thighs 22 Mar 01 - 11:59 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 05:19 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 08:25 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 08:31 AM
alison 23 Mar 01 - 08:37 AM
GUEST,micca at work. 23 Mar 01 - 08:41 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 08:45 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 09:00 AM
Big Mick 23 Mar 01 - 09:42 AM
alison 23 Mar 01 - 09:47 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 09:52 AM
MMario 23 Mar 01 - 10:01 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 10:09 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 10:54 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 11:01 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 11:08 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 11:33 AM
Micca 23 Mar 01 - 11:42 AM
Ella who is Sooze 23 Mar 01 - 11:47 AM
SINSULL 23 Mar 01 - 12:27 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 02:12 PM
Micca 23 Mar 01 - 02:16 PM
hesperis 23 Mar 01 - 02:54 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM
MMario 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 03:52 PM
Micca 23 Mar 01 - 04:59 PM
Morticia 23 Mar 01 - 07:01 PM
hesperis 23 Mar 01 - 08:21 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Mar 01 - 12:32 AM
SINSULL 24 Mar 01 - 11:56 AM
Micca 24 Mar 01 - 01:16 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Mar 01 - 01:34 PM
Morticia 24 Mar 01 - 03:39 PM
Lonesome EJ 24 Mar 01 - 03:46 PM
hesperis 24 Mar 01 - 07:46 PM
Amergin 25 Mar 01 - 12:03 AM
alison 25 Mar 01 - 06:46 AM

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Subject: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 02:22 PM

The snows have melted back into the trees surrounding this mountain meadow. Several springs, newly filled with melted ice, join here to re-create the brook that flows down the flank of the mountain. Alpine flowers are peeking from the greening grass, and the trees are filling with the shoots of leaves. The world is being born again in this meadow, as it is everywhere across the land. And so begins the Rites of Spring. Hi, I'm Bacchus. I'll be your host.

I see that the forest denizens are emerging after the winter's hibernation, and soon the air is alive with the music of drum and pipe. Several Centaurs, including the ones known as Roger the Skiffler and Katlaughing, are stacking amphorae filled with white wine in the arbor. The Satyrs, among them Catspaw and Big Mick, have arrived, attempting to stir things up with the nymphs. Pegasi float down to the ground through bright sun and rising mist.

Fill your cups and fill the meadow with music! It's Spring, and the earth is alive again!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 02:28 PM

Hey! You with the scarf! Nijinski! Knock it off! Or at least go behind a tree! Damn.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Allan C.
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 02:44 PM

Whew! That was close! A whole flock of dryads were trying to repossess my guitar! Is there enough comfry and dock around to make a good spring tonic? If so, I sure could use a noggin of it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 02:45 PM

Nice to be the Centaur of attraction for once! (My amphorae are filled with Greek brandy!).
Bacchus, peel me a grape! The fauns are coming from the bakery: I can hear the pitta of tiny feet!
RtS


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 02:53 PM

Allan - you'll find the dock over by the hickory...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Allan C.
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 02:56 PM

You mean right over there where Greenhaus is standing?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:02 PM

Alright! That's about enough hickory dickery, Doc!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Kim C
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:05 PM

Pass the Jameson's please.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Bert
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:08 PM

Altogether now!

Ninety Nine Amphorae of wine on the wall...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Amergin
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:10 PM

hmmm, I would have figured Katdarling and Spaw to be imps....not centaurs.....so who are the nymphs?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:17 PM

We're open for volunteers on that one, Amergin. I think we can count on Alison, though.

Allan? Peel you a grape? Sorry, never touch the stuff in solid form. I will have another brimming goblet of that Greek brandy. And one for my donkey, too! Help me get this side of mutton on the spit, mMario. Man, that fire is hot. Makes it tough to apply this olive oil and garlic baste.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:29 PM

TOGA! TOGA! TOGA! ooops. sorry. too soon...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Hollowfox
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:30 PM

RtS, this is the wrong time of year to have your wine in pill form, peeled or not. Can you teach me how to stack amphorae? Oh, the empty ones..it pays to be tidy during Spring Cleaning. I'll help; it's just part of exercising our rites. Why yes, thanks, I'll have another thimbleful of...yes, whatever it's called.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:34 PM

Nectar. Ambrosia comes later with dessert.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Noreen
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:38 PM

I thought I saw Dick over by the bay tree? Well, he was sitting by the dock or the bay...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:40 PM

EJ - helps to apply the baste with a brush - and don't stand in the fire while you do it! *sniff* rosemary in there too, eh? But why did you leave the little tag around it's neck? what's it say?

"Property of Marsa Matrouh District Municipal Police, Sidi Barrani, Egypt"


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:54 PM

Well, ok, Mario. It might be a camel, I'm really not sure. Some sheep have humps, right?

The handle on this basting brush is too short. Let me load up this turkey-baster and see if I can hit it from here.....OOPS! Sorry there, Sinsull.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,GUEST Chester
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 03:57 PM

Eye'll hev a hicory daquiri, Doc. Thanx.

Oh, nebber count de bubbles
When dar's water in de spring
Dar's no one who hez trubbles
When he hez a song ter sing

Everbuddy sing:

Ring, ring de banjar
I like dat good ol' song
Come away my true luv
Oh whar ya been so long?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 04:03 PM

OUCH! That's hot. EJ - I am here 5 minutes and I'm covered with grease! Don't even think about it Spaw - I'll rinse it out myself, Thank You. No. Club soda will take it out, not red wine. Great, now I'm covered with grease, red wine, and drool. Excuse me - time for a wardrobe change. BRB.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Amergin
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 04:05 PM

Well, Sins, it could be worse...it could be Cletus' drool...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 04:22 PM

Tra la la la laaaaaaaaaa, la la la la , hee hee hee *hic* tra la.........
Here I am, a nymph of luvverly springtime, all dressed in my daffy-down-dillies, ready to join in with wild, uh, ambanfdfgg, er, abumdom, abannndonnn, hee hee hee...........
Whatchall drinkin'? Could you just hold my goblet steady and pour me some?


I reeeeeeeeeeeeally need this fantasy right now, with the snowstorm in the weather forecast and trouble on my mind. Thanks, Leej!)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 04:35 PM

cAREFUL, aNIMATERRA! tHE CENTAURS ARE CHEWING THE DAFFY DOWN DILLIES OFF YOUR -uh tOO LATE. mY SPARE IS A LITTLE MESSY BUT YOUR WELCOME TO IT. Funny how we always end up running out of clothes every year...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 05:20 PM

Ok, I've got a delivery here for 15 sets of pan pipes, two barrels of bisodol, extra jello and a copy of THE LAW AND YOU, someone want to tell me where to put them?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Kim C
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 05:26 PM

and what about this boatload of feta cheese and kalamata olives? (pass the Jamesons again, please)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Matt_R
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 05:35 PM

I'm gonna go be a satyr with Spaw & Mick (hey, I DID run against Big Mick as Secretary of the Sacred Fertility Rite, but losr). BTW you know what they call us satyrs? Cuz we're the only one who can satyr.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Bert
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 05:42 PM

Hey SINSMELUV, did I tell you about my encounter with red wine and Club Soda?

I was on this British Airways flight, all dressup for the vacation in this new pair of off white pants. The flight attendant brought 'round the wine (It was complimentary in those days - GAWD all you get now is peanuts) and managed to spill it in my lap. Of course she was horrified. A nearby passenger said tha Club Soda would get rid of it. The flight attendant was delighted - she said AH! we've got club soda, and rushed off. She came back with a can, popped the top and poured it all over the stain, which as you remember was in my lap. Trouble is - it was straight out of the ice chest.
Bert.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: gnu
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 05:53 PM

Did anything pop ? Did she get it off ? Did it come out ? Details, details !

gnu


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 08:52 PM

Bert,
Did you figure out that she was coming on to you when she offered to rub it until it was warm?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 10:08 PM

Uh, *puff* Sinss- erm- thanks for the offer, but this is a little *oof* tight- *Whew!* But it'll do! Now, where's the nectar and ambrosia? And isn't anyone going to sing?

We'll pipe and we'll sing love,
We'll dance in a ring, love,
As each lad takes his lass
All on the green grass....


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 10:34 PM

Ninety nine amphorae of wine on the wall
Ninety nine amphorae of wine
Take a swig, dance a jig
and it's ninety eight amphorae of wine on the wall!

Must be small amphorae...

Well, I am some kind of forest creature, that's for sure. I have my own pan-pipes, though, as you might see if you get the calendar! (End shameless mudcat calendar plug.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 10:38 PM

Bacchus/LEJ bounces to his feet, his laurel crown covering one eye, swinging his donkey by the forelegs

When the flowers bloom on Mount Parnassus
The boys and girls all fill their glasses
When Spring arrives on Mt Olympus
How the dancing nymphs do temp' us
And with the wine all fast dispersing
How my rhymes get worse and worsing

Falls down


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 10:52 PM

Hey boys..... over here..... outside in the beer garden......

some jerk chained me to this big rock.... and there's a nasty looking monster over there seems to think I'm lunch.....

HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rescue me and I'll be VERY grateful *grin*

slainte

alison


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 10:58 PM

Hey where are those bolt-cutters! We've got a nymph-in-distress!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Amos
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 11:46 PM

Persephone!!! Retzina!! Tune up your Bazouki!! Strum!! Dance!! Glink!!

Now, Fair One, we'll have you out in a jiff...but don't cry!! We'll give you a Pasiphåe! I always did say good native dance music beat rolling rocks --

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Matt_R
Date: 20 Mar 01 - 11:52 PM

Persephone? More like Andromeda!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Big Mick
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 12:34 AM

The door flies open and the biggest damn Mick you have ever seen.......dressed rather oddly in a thong with Greek symbols running down the ........... you get the idea.......comes running out.........quick as a flash he pulls this giant spud out of his back pocket..........you get the idea..........and hurls it mightily at the ogre cathing it between the eyes........the creature faints dead away either from the concussion or the smell, testing will determine which........

There you go, FAIR ONE, let me get you out of those chains...........wait, let me think this through..........Never have gone for the whips and chains thing but this is .............. Never mind, Mick breaks the chains, but saves them for later......LOL. Come on, good lookin', let's go try some of that wine. Do you think they still have the vile black stuff, though..........you know just in case????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Peg
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 01:50 AM

In mud-dappled skirts I come,
My ankles perfumed with rising sap
My hair henna'ed with the juice of maple buds
Around my hips a sash of pussy-willow,
braided with daffodils and storm-drenched moss...
Across my shoulders a shawl of wisteria
In my hands, a wineskin full to bursting
In my ears, a forest melody tinged with feverish dreaming,
In my feet, unlearned and unforgotten dances,
And in my eyes, a misty fragment of landscape, mountains of madness and merriment, the path before me, winding upwards, a fresh cloven track, the smell of musk and hyacinth sharp upon the air...

Aw, heck, how's about some lilac nectar?

Peg


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 06:53 AM

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww........... my hero!!!!!!!!!........

now about that being VERY grateful................ hahaha ........

grab a few amphorae and lets sneak off into that olive grove........ nobody will miss us for a few hours.....


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Noreen
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 07:53 AM

...a glimmering girl
with apple blossom in her hair
who called me by my name and ran
and vanished in the brightening a...
Though I am old with wandering
through hollow lands and hilly lands
I will find out where she has gone
and see her lips and take her hand...

Trainee nymph wanders off humming, accompanied by strange rustling and rattling sounds from yonder olive grove…


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 08:52 AM

Cloven hooves??? Do Centaurs and Satyrs have cloven hooves? Hate to rain on your parade guys but no eating the centaurs or satyrs without a health certificate.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 08:59 AM

EATING the Centaurs? When they invited me for dinner no one said I was on the menu! If I have four feet does that mean I put them "in it" more often?
RtSkiffling Centaur (with only foot in mouth)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Jeri
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 09:23 AM

There's a hidden world just waiting.
Where snowdrop and crocus grow -
In a crystal faerie kingdom,
Under several (&#%*ing) feet of snow...

Tree sprite here. Unfortunately, most of us are still napping. I'm a maple sprite, so I'm sort of awake, but pretty tapped out at the moment. Feeling kind of sappy, if you know what I mean...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Allan C.
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 11:15 AM

And Mick, he broke locks
And Mick, he broke bolts
And Mick, he broke all that he came nigh,
To rescue our fair Alison,
And gratefully she spread ...er...thanked him.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 11:21 AM

And all I got was this lousy shirt!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 11:41 AM

But underneath that rough outer surface we all know the maple sprite is sweet...

HEY!

OUCH!

Jeri just hit me for no reason!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 11:43 AM

Don't worry Matt. You are soon to be the center of attention. Bacchus is looking for a virgin to sacrifice and so far, you are it! The position includes a laurel wreath crown, clean white toga, and all the wine or grape juice you can handle. The sacrificial lamb murdered the shepherd assigned to bring him to the party (see Song Challenge) so we're improvising.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 02:37 PM

Come fillup your glasses, and let us be merry For the moon it is shining all over the hill
As we roam through the valley
Where the lilies and the roses
And the beauty of Kashmir lays down his sweet head
Come on lads, hit that top note with me and hang on to your toga's. Enter nymph with attitude and boots on,scratching disconsolately at her laurel wreath and swigging intermittently at a large amphora of best bitter.She belches in a melancholic fashion and can be heard muttering...." Paradise be buggered.Bucolic scenes of pastoral innocence and revels my left sandal!I wanna go to a night club, I wanna go and vomit on a taxi driver...I was promised, I was....next Macdonalds would be mine!"


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 03:02 PM

Hey! Bacchus. This party sucks. Everybody's bitching. Nobody's having fun except Mick and the fair one - and they're having their own party. Bad puns, bad poetry, bad costumes...and no sea shanties! The sheep (camel) is blood rare and LonesomeEJ is well done. Hesperis is down to 54 amphorae - if she takes one more swig or dances one more jig she'll be decorating the wall with recycled wine. MMario thought it was a Renaissance theme party. He's tickling the boys with that damn feather and goosing the girls with his lute. Bert's totally confused. One hornful of wine and he's passed out under a fig tree rambling on about "the mile high club". Next year, hire a caterer. Now, get back here and get this thing organized!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:03 PM

More trouble! Zeus just found out about Big Mick letting Allison loose. He's chasing him around the lower forty with a potato masher. At least this is interesting.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Matt_R
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:18 PM

Isn't it time for my virginity-losing ceremony?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:21 PM

I wouldn't bring that up right now, Matt. Not with Zeus running around with a potato masher. You might lose more than your virginity. Besides, Big Mick is in charge of fertility rites - and he is pre-occupied at the moment. Just got a thunderbolt in the spud (if you know what I mean).


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Allan C.
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:22 PM

Gee, that'd be sure to make him Thor!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Amos
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:28 PM

I think we can find some Loki anaesthetic here, just he doesn't get a swollen head....


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:31 PM

Says the Greek with the torn toga to the local tailor: "Eumenides?"


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Matt_R
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 04:31 PM

Yeah, like ol' Hrungnir! He got a boulder to the noggin! BAM!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Hollowfox
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 06:33 PM

Sinsull, I wasn't gonna chomp on the satyrs! Can I nibble, though? What ARE you hungry for, anyway? Let me know and I'll whip it up. Whaddaya wanna sin? you start the shanty of your choice, I'll join in, and between the two of us, we'll know plenty of verses.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 07:36 PM

Why is the wood spirit chasing the satyrs???
Oh....Its Satyr day night and I aint got no body??


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 07:48 PM

Whaddya wanna *hic* SIN? Ha Ha Ha *hic*

Anybpody wanna join me *hic* in drinking these amphorae? Nothing *hic* else, ok*hic*ay?

Hey, DrinKing! Let's crown a Drink King!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 08:17 PM

Matt didn't they tell you... you aren't going to lose it.......... they just sacrifice you....... otherwise you wouldn't be a "virgin" sacrifice anymore.......

mean isn't it....... here drink some ambrosia.... you'll feel better............


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 21 Mar 01 - 11:43 PM

Well, Matt. Pressure's on. If you're still a virgin at High Noon, we'll have to drown you in the Giant Amphora of Diana, which really ain't that bad by the way. I went through it back when I was a virgin, and once more when I achieved born-again virgin status in my mid-twenties. But with all these nymphs nipping about bedecked with diaphonous veils and so forth, I'd say you've got a damn good shot at avoiding the dreaded submersion. Follow Mick around and do what he does, but watch out for that female-gorilla stalker that's after him.

Now, it has been brought to my attention that we are running a bit low on wine, but as we have this large vat and a plentiful supply of grapes...everybody off with your sandals and into the vat! Everybody but Catspaw, that is...I don't wanna see the kind of feet he's got inside those Converse high-tops. Anyone know the Tarantella?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 12:00 AM

WEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Splllllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssshhhhhhhhhh....

I love jello-wrestling, but this grape squishing is good fun too.....

lets all link arms and dance Zorba the Greek ..................


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 12:24 AM

I am sober now.

Just in time for more fun! *squish!* go the grapes...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Matt_R
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 12:39 AM

Joy! Splat.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,micca at work
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 07:32 AM

Could a one legged grape treader from Bordeaux be said to have one foot in the Graves????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:31 AM

*groan*................ lol

Hey LEJ... is the rumour true?.... you know the one about there not being any water to rinse this off.. so we have to lick each other clean??????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:38 AM

MMMM Toe sucking! There may be hope for this party after all.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:46 AM

how did you only get your toes covered? ...... most of the rest of us fell over when we tried to do the lambada.... we're completely plastered in the stuff........


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 09:55 AM

I just sat on the edge and splashed. I already lost one toga to grease, red wine, and... well, no need to go into details.
Someone want to rummage around in that mess and see if you can find Bacchus. I haven't seen him in a while and we don't want him to drown.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 11:18 AM

Bad poetry???

Hey Sinsull, I spent a lot of time on that!

Write your own odes to Bacchus, you complaining, ungrateful little satyrical wine-swilling furry-groined cloven-hooved deflowerer of nymphs, you!!!

(Peg, aka Crocus Thighs, stomps off in a tree-spritely huff and takes all her aphrodisiac damiana wine with her...)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 11:39 AM

Peg - How the hell much have you had to drink? I am female and heterosexual. And watch the furry-groin cracks! I am freshly waxed for the festivities!

There once was a tree sprite named Peg
Who drank lilac wine from a keg
She sucked it and swilled it
Then three times refilled it
Out-guzzling Spaw, Cletus, and Reg.
You want bad poetry? I'll give you bad poetry!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Crocus Thighs
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 11:59 AM

Oh my, Sinsull! I do apologize. I think all that centaur chatter brainwashed me...my small brain, mind you...heh heh. Spring fever and all.

Very bad poetry, I must say. Though technically speaking, it is a limerick...well done. ("Perhaps you are forgiven your earlier trespass," she said, wiping off the rim of the wineskin with her sap-sticky skirt...)

Nothing to drink YET; arrived in bumpy weather to sunny Clearwater, Florida. Very nauseous and dizzy and head-poundingly sick last night (good thing I DIDN'T drink on the plane!)

Much better today. Off to a small pagan gathering at a nudist camp in nearby Land o' Lakes tomorrow and Saturday!

Do I get points for REAL merrymaking with nymphs, sprites, satyrs and bacchae???

Will report back soon...eat your hearts out, but in a good way, and I shall do my best to make myself worthy of your festivities...

Peg, aka Crocus Thighs


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 05:19 AM

Ella the Spritely,

Joins in the grape squishing and treads on Bacchus.

Chucks a messy handful of mush at Alison, prods Matt and throws grape goo at Sinsulls new toga.

:)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:25 AM

Toe-sucking! YE-YES!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:31 AM

Typical! Now it's deteriorating into a food fight. There you go Ella - you look elegant in ambrosia. HEE HEE her mascara is running.

Uh Matt? This is an orgy. You're supposed to be sucking on someone else's toes! How do you do that anyway?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:37 AM

Right Ella.... you started it.....

don't you realise that I (and Harpy)are undefeated jello wrestling champs........

a VERY slimy Fair One does a graceful leap across the tub.... rugby tackles Emma..... and both disappear into the goo


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,micca at work.
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:41 AM

A short ,fat, gnomelike figure wearing a kilt with a fitted hip flask (with "Biohazard" labels on the outside of the flask) is seen wandering around measuring up and muttering," site for the "Sargeant Howie Memorial barbecue"and "how much Whicker will I need?" and " Is "Summer is icumen in" in the DT" " Bloody Greeks, Neo-pagans,get in everywhere, and what about the Eleusinian Mysteries, no one wants to give them ago... and this Plonk Nouveau isnt bad...can I have another amphora please..."


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:45 AM

Not my own! Geez Sins, let's not get gross here!!!

Hey Micca, shouldn't you have the kilt off and waving it around??


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:00 AM

grabs micca another amphora, sinks it into the wine slush, picks out a few bits of non descript, undescribables and hands him a few more drops....

Would prefer it if Micca left his kilt on... hem hem... afterall, what's the old saying.... better to leave some things to the imagination? *grin*

Hey.. Micca... what's in the flask, and can I have some... will it make me glow in the dark?

E


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Big Mick
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:42 AM

The biggest Mick you have ever seen sheds his breeches and does a double back flip into the tub..........

It is my understanding from THE FAIR ONE that there is grape juice to be licked here, as the Keeper of the Sacred Fertility Rites, and given where this type of activity may lead, I must insist on initiating all such activities............with the females that is..........You, the hairy one, you are outa here..........MattR, I am sorry but this could lead to the loss of virginity and we need you for finale........Right lad, FAIR ONE, could you get the lad some of that ambrosia?????.........Thanks, m'love, and I will meet you in the Oak Grove in a minute for some private instruction............


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:47 AM

oh goody goody.... we're off to the grove..... again!!!

I like nights like these.... lol.............


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 09:52 AM

I will ONLY eat ambrosia if it consists of marshmallows, pineapple chunks, mandarin oranges, and sour cream!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:01 AM

*gack!*


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM

HURL Bluuuuarghhhhh Heck heck

Gawd... Alison is getting all the fun...

Sulk...

lol

Ella


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:05 AM

C'mon Mario!! It's one of the world's most perfect foods!! MMmmmmm I could go for some right now. Haven't had it in FOREVER!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:09 AM

you havnt had it in forever....

ooooooOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH....

Where's Spaw when you need him...lol


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 10:54 AM

This from the guy who sucks his own toes!!!!!Somebody make sure he brushes his teeth before the ceremony. Just our luck to get nail clippings in the jell-o.

Oh dear gods and goddesses, Micca!! Put your kilt back on! Your getting little black curly hairs in the ambrosia and I'm scheduled for a dental check-up tomorrow!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:01 AM

was wondering what that annoying little tickle was at the back of my throat was.... LMAO...Sorry.. bout that...

LOL.....OOOOOO Matron


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:08 AM

OK Now. Pay attention. While Matt is off brushing his teeth, let's start the incantaions. Didn't want to scare the poor boy with all that "eater of raw flesh" stuff. Don't want to tie him down if we don't have to. Shame he doesn't drink...Oh well. Here goes:

Dionysou thymiama styraka

Kiklêskô Dionyson Eribromon, Euastêra, Prôtogonon, Diphuê, Trigonon, Bakcheion, Anakta! Agrion, Arrêton, Kryphion, Dikerôta, Dimorphon! Kissobryon, Taurôpon, Arêion, Euion, Hagnon! Ômadion, Trietê, Botryêphoron, Ernesipeplon! Euboleus, Polyboulos, Dios kai Persephoneiês Arrêtois lektroisi teknôtheis, Ambrote Daimon Klythi, Makar, phônês, hêdys d' epipneusoon amemphês Eumenes êtor echôn, syn euzôoisi tithênais.

I translated it for the blues singers among us
To Dionysos With storax incense

I summon Dionysos the Loud Roarer, He Who Cries Eua, Firstborn, Two-Natured, Thrice Born, Bacchic One, My Lord! Wild One, Unspeakable One, Secret One, Two-Horned and Two-Formed One! Ivy-wrapped, Bull-faced, Martial Reveler, Thou Pure One! Eater of Raw Flesh, Lord of Biennial Rites, Bearer of Grapes, Wearer of Green Shoots! Good Councilor, Frequent Councilor, Child of Zeus and of Persephonê When They joined in an ineffable Union, Thou immortal Spirit! Hear Thou, Blessed One, my voice, and gently breathe Thou upon me Kindheartedly, with Thy fair-girt Nurturers.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:33 AM

I thought you were reading out the contents of your medicine cabinet

E


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:42 AM

Sins, you forgot the bit about" Come Kore, Maiden come, bring Holy hours of thy most Holy Spring.....and so long as there is no Savlon in the offing (ask Liz the Squeak) will retain my kilt...The falsk always contains some strange and Outlandish alcholic beverage, at present it is Stroh rum, (60% by Volof Alcohol, 120 proof UK, 160 proof US)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 11:47 AM

Rum..........yum rum yum rum yum!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 12:27 PM

Micca - we couldn't find a maiden. Matt will have to do. And Ella - that's the wrong chant. Turn to Page 356. You've lost yourself in the sea shanties again.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 02:12 PM

A more up to date translation for the blues singers amongst might more closely resemble the following:

Woke up this morning, found my virgin child was gone
Woke up this morning, found my virgin child was gone
The Dark Lord come on in and ravished
That little child of Persephone

Don't you hate it when that happens,wearer of green shoots done got my girl?
Hate it when that happens, wearer of green shoots got my girl?
Guess it's reasonable compensation
For being Lord of the Underworld


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 02:16 PM

Ella, it is actually Rum flavoured " death on wheels" of the kind that you dont swallow, you take it in your mouth and it evaporates, straight into the head....WOW!!!! ask LtS, and assorted others that have tried it.
Sins, that is the invocationfor a very different spring festival... do you think Matt could do a Sgt Howie ?????


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 02:54 PM

Morty - where did you find that? Or did you just write it? I love it!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM

I just made it up on the spot, Hesp.....feel free to add on and/or use, just as you like :)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: MMario
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 03:04 PM

Micca - where did you get some of Nanny Ogg's cider?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 03:52 PM

Ahhh, the stuff that's made of apples......mostly. He can't have that in his hip flask, it would eat it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 04:59 PM

Morty, isnt STROOOOOOOH!!!!! enough??


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 07:01 PM

Not compared to Scumble, it isn't.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 08:21 PM

Nothing even remotely alcoholic is comparable to Scumble.

Very cool, Morty! Unfortunately, I just can't do the blues. (It doesn't work... I'll tell Jande about this thred though. She can do the blues.)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 12:32 AM

Bacchus, wearing snorkel and mask, emerges from grape juice, now died a sort of regal purple from head to toe

I've been down there over an hour digging the pistonoid, workmanlike movements of your feet, and i have to say I'm damned impressed, especially in the middle of my back where Big Mick stepped on me. You are all to be commended. Anybody want to borrow the snorkel?

Now where's that danged virgin? My juice-proof watch tells me it's quarter til sacrifice o'clock! But you know, I don't like the look of those thunderheads building up around Olympus there. I believe my step-Dad Dr Zeus might be cooking up a few lightning bolts for my guests.

RRRRRRuuuummmmbllle


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 11:56 AM

Lavender Blue Dilly Dilly...sorry Bacchus. You inspired me.

THWACK!!!!!

Damn Zeus! That was my last toga. All I have left now is a polyester pants suit.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Micca
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 01:16 PM

"Toga or not Toga
that is the question ?
wHether it is knobblier in the mire
to suffer the bolts
an brickbats of outraged deities
or take up arms
against a tub of grape juice
and by so doing
Vintage.....hic... "
and subsides into a drunken stupor at the side of the tub.
clutching an amphora, and muttering
" you are my scumble,,,my only scumble...


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 01:34 PM

OK, this lightning matter is becoming serious. Lifeguard says everyone out of the wine vat! Here, I'll get Micca's right arm if someone can grab his left. One..two..three...up you go, lad.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Morticia
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 03:39 PM

Oh man, do you know how many times I have had to carry Micca, as drunk as a carrot, out of olive groves???Oh yes, of course you do, you're Bacchus, you put him there in the first place. While we're here ( and is he getting heavier or is it just me?) you might want to know that your sacrifice has just run off with a nymph and that last bolt of lightening scorched all the leaves off the grove where Alison and Mick are being 'educational'.Should we tell them or should I go get the video camera?


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 03:46 PM

Get the video camera. Damn! Lookit that. Didn't know your back could bend that way.


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: hesperis
Date: 24 Mar 01 - 07:46 PM

(New thread, please, this one is getting long...)


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: Amergin
Date: 25 Mar 01 - 12:03 AM

Bacchus took Micca into the olive groves? What was he doing to the poor man? on second thought I don't want to know.....


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Subject: RE: BS: Tavern Rites of Spring
From: alison
Date: 25 Mar 01 - 06:46 AM

er.... Mick........

I've got the funniest sensation that we're being watched.......

ARRRRGGGHHHHHHHH

we ARE being watched.........

alison runs off to hide over here

yep you've guessed it.. follow the clicky to the next installment.......... *grin*


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This Thread Is Closed.


Mudcat time: 20 January 3:08 PM EST

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