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BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001

Jande 09 Apr 01 - 09:16 AM
Amos 09 Apr 01 - 09:32 AM
Pseudolus 09 Apr 01 - 09:43 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 09:56 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 09:58 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 09 Apr 01 - 10:11 AM
RichM 09 Apr 01 - 10:13 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 10:23 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 10:25 AM
wysiwyg 09 Apr 01 - 10:36 AM
Irish sergeant 09 Apr 01 - 10:41 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 09 Apr 01 - 10:46 AM
Bill D 09 Apr 01 - 11:09 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 11:21 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 11:24 AM
wysiwyg 09 Apr 01 - 11:26 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 09 Apr 01 - 11:30 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 11:42 AM
GUEST,Matt_R 09 Apr 01 - 11:51 AM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 12:11 PM
wildlone 09 Apr 01 - 02:22 PM
Peter T. 09 Apr 01 - 02:44 PM
GUEST,Midchuck upstairs 09 Apr 01 - 03:05 PM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 03:08 PM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 03:14 PM
Greyeyes 09 Apr 01 - 03:35 PM
RichM 09 Apr 01 - 04:16 PM
CarolC 09 Apr 01 - 04:18 PM
Clinton Hammond 09 Apr 01 - 04:29 PM
Bill D 09 Apr 01 - 06:11 PM
GUEST,#1 09 Apr 01 - 06:34 PM
Helen 09 Apr 01 - 07:09 PM
Geoff the Duck 09 Apr 01 - 08:47 PM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 09:31 PM
Jande 09 Apr 01 - 10:04 PM
Clinton Hammond 10 Apr 01 - 12:25 AM
Irish sergeant 10 Apr 01 - 09:06 AM
JudeL 10 Apr 01 - 10:57 AM
Mrs.Duck 10 Apr 01 - 11:53 AM
enkd 10 Apr 01 - 12:25 PM
Helen 10 Apr 01 - 07:26 PM

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Subject: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:16 AM

I hope this hasn't been posted before. It really cheered me up this monday morning. Even more than the NYS Sunshine. I wonder if anyone here can think up a few more of these specifically to do with music? Like this:

You check Mudcat before you make any musical decision including whether or not to tap your spoon on your cereal bowl in the morning. Anyway... here goes:

Subject: Signs You Are Living in the Year 2001

> 1. You just tried to enter your password on the microwave.

> 2. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.

> 3. You call your son's beeper to let him know it's time to eat. He SMS' you back from his bedroom, "What's for dinner?"

> 4. Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.

> 5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken with your next door neighbor yet this year.

> 6. You check the ingredients on a can of chicken noodle soup to see if it contains Echinacea.

> 7. Your grandmother asks you to send her a JPEG file of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.

> 8. You pull up in your own driveway and use your mobile phone to see if anyone is home.

> 9. Every commercial on television has a website address at the bottom of the screen.

> 10. You buy a computer and 6 months later it is out of date and now sells for half the price you paid.

> 11. Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 years of your life, is cause for panic and you turn around to go get it.

> 12. Using real money, instead of credit or debit, to make a purchase would be a hassle and take planning.

> 13. Cleaning up the dining room means getting the fast food bags out of the back seat of your car.

> 14. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
> 15. You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.

> 16. Your dining room table is now your flat filing cabinet.

> 17. Your idea of being organized is multiple-colored Post-it notes.

> 18. You hear most of your jokes via e-mail instead of in person.

> 19. You get an extra phone line so you can get phone calls.

> 20. You disconnect from the Internet and get this awful feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

> 21. You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee.

> 22. You wake up at 3:00 am to go to the bathroom and check your E-mail on your way back to bed.

> 23. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :> :)

> 24. You're reading this.

> 25. Even worse; you're going to send it on to someone else.


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Amos
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:32 AM

9 out of ten, guilty as charged!!

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Pseudolus
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:43 AM

Amos, How'd you get nine out of ten when there were twenty five choices!?! lol

Frank


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:56 AM

Heheh...

Maybe, Amos only meant 9 out of ten *so far*... ;`)

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:58 AM

Here's another musical one:

You learn how to drum from the synthesizer in your midi keyboard.

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:11 AM

Heck with 2001! I was doing playing with my synthesizer drums back in 1994!


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: RichM
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:13 AM

3,5,8,9,10,11,12,14,16,17,18,19,20,21,22,24,25

...and I'll defend every one of them! :)

Rich


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:23 AM

Well, Matt, that is something to brag about. Did it help?

:`)

I was talking about "learning" about drumming, rythmn, etc., which I have only just started to do because of the excellent current thread here on the subject.

How about this one?:

You put off purchasing that brand new hot sound card for your home recording studio computer, but you get it anyway when the lastest computer game is released.

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:25 AM

Woohooo! Rich, I'd like to hear your defences! LOL!

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: wysiwyg
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:36 AM

You have more hugs, smiles, and sex in cyberland than anywhere else, and it seems normal.

Your pets are cyberpets.

You check the online weather forecast before going outside to see what the day is like.

You believe and distribute cybernews that conflicts with what you have observed for yourself.

You are in six websites for medical stuff but have not seen your own doctor for years.

You need to visit Expedia or Mapquest before you drive to an address for whihc you already have perfectly reasonable directions within your own town.

You would rather look at topographical maps than actually go camping, fishing, or hunting.

You are caught in a seemingly endless loop that runs between cyber rumors (and virus hoaxes) and cyber hoax exposing sites (virus hoax sites), believed that the site that has the "truth" actually has gotten to the bottom of something, and further, something you really needed to know..

You go to a church online. *G* (I don't so I guess I am "saved.")

~S~


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:41 AM

Instead of carping about junk mail you carp about the c#&p that you get via e-mail. Most of yours Jande, I haven't done and I only very rarely check my e-mail before coffee. I, as my wife will tell you, am not a 21st century man. Kindest reguards, Neil


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:46 AM

Though you ride on the heels of tomorrow
You still wander the fields of your sorrow...


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:09 AM

Your library card is somewhere at the bottom of a drawer...who needs it when there is Google and AltaVista and Mudcat?


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:21 AM

Okay, Matt... Ya got me again! ::grin:: Where's that snippet from? (It makes me feel a bit stoned!)

Neil: My partner and I made up a word for people like ourselves who use technology but don't like it, or grouse about it anyway. We call them "technomugeons". What do you think? ;`)

WYSIWYG: I like your additions! As far as that last one is concerned, I guess we're both "saved". LOL! Unless visting the occasional pagan site counts... 0.0

As far a cyberpets goes... I used to play with an A-life game/sim called "Creatures" (I have all three versions of the game). This weekend my partner brought home Black & White, which has one Creature you raise to help you play god (good or evil or anything in between--your choice) to a bunch of villagers. Started the game at 6pm looked at the clock after an absorbing amount of game play time went by feeding and teaching my creature how to cast spells, only to be dismayed to find it was 3:40 a.m.!! James and I were both astonished at how much time had passed! LOL! Good thing it was Sat night! ;`)

BTW, I forgot to say that I received the original list as a fWD email this morning. I have no idea where it originated...

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:24 AM

Gosh, Bill! I'm not sure I know where my library card is?? But I can always find Mudcat, google and AltaVista! :`}

Good one!

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: wysiwyg
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:26 AM

*G*G*


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:30 AM

Aw, Jande, stop making yourself out to be stupid! You are very intelligent from what I've seen.

It was playing off Neil's comments about being a 21st Century Man, so I was quoting a line from ELO's "21st Century Man".


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:42 AM

Oops! Matt, I wasn't aware I was making myself out to be stupid. I was simply (clumsilly, obviously) trying to say that I admire your memory for these things, the knowledge you have, and that I appreciate the things I learn from you.

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: GUEST,Matt_R
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 11:51 AM

Wow...thanks for the compliments! I'm blushing!


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 12:11 PM

Well, I should hope SO! LOL! I enjoy giving credit where it's due. ;`)

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: wildlone
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 02:22 PM

download the complete driving instructions for a 250 mile journey, get to within 1/2 mile of where you wanted to go without looking at them once, Then ask a passer by for help.
I was riding my bike with the printout saftly tucked in an inside pocket of my leathers.
dave


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Peter T.
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 02:44 PM

You know you are in 2001 when:

You finally have to stop saying "at the turn of the century".
"The English Patient" is filed under Classics (in my local library, last week).
There is as much time between Louis Armstrong's Hot Fives and the formation of the Beatles as there is between the breakup of the Beatles and now.
There is as much time between the landing of a man on the moon and now, as there was betweeen Columbus' arrival in the New World and Cortez' Conquest of Mexico, the Portuguese conquering of the Indian Ocean, the first global circumnavigation.

Question: Why is Dial soap still called Dial soap?
yours, Peter T.


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: GUEST,Midchuck upstairs
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 03:05 PM

Only guilty on 5,9,10,14,17,18 and 24 - and 9 is not under my control.

21 is a hard call. I usually start the water for coffee and grind the beans first, then check e-mail while the water's heating, then make the coffee.

Peter.


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 03:08 PM

PeterT: Nice ones!

Somehow "Push-button" Soap, "LED" soap or "Point& Click" Soap doesn't quite have the marketing pinache! (Yet!)

Wildlone: LOL! I've done that myself but only on much smaller journeys.

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 03:14 PM

Midchuck: I usually start the kettle, check my email, answer a few, peek at a few newgroups to see if I got any questions answered, remember a bit of music I wanted to get down in Cakewalk, look at the time, and find that it's mid afternoon and the kettle has boiled dry again (at least it did until I got wise and bought one that shuts itself off once it boils.) (sometimes I start the kettle numerous times and wander back to the computer for "just a sec".) I commend you on your self-discipline! ;`)

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Greyeyes
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 03:35 PM

As I have commented before, the internet is a very limited research tool compared with the resources available at a good reference library, and the inter library loan scheme. It will be many years, possibly several generations, before the entire stock of the British Library is digitised and available free to everybody on the net, as it is available now by filling in a card at your local library.

I would advise everybody to hold on to their library card, the public library service is still one of the greatest jewels in the crown of western civilisation. (although I am slightly biased)


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: RichM
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 04:16 PM

Further elaboration about my yesses:
3,5,8,9,10,11,12,14,16,17,18,19,20,21,22,24,25

3:It's easier than yelling from downstairs

5: I can't reboot my neighbor as quickly

8: Pure laziness

9: I didn't say that I've been to ALL those websites :)

10:This is a universal law:
E(mail) = M(icrosoft) C(orporation) squared...
result is payable in $$
11. Make that the first 55 years; age and experience doesn't protect us from ALL foolishness :)

12. I think of it as my cyber-wallet...

14.Well, right! ...?who writes letters these days? :)

16. AND storage for my octave mando,music books,tuner, 3 days of newspapers, and a national geographic.

17. Yep. Post-its = good!

18. Now I have an endless supply of jokes to tell.

19. Extra phone line because I had a TEEN communication specialist!
The computer connection is cable-- (nyahnyahnyah)

20. And I hug my computer too.

21. Yep. While waiting for the coffee to drip.

22. Sometimes, yes!

24. Guilty.

25. Yep: I have no shame!

CyberRich


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: CarolC
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 04:18 PM

Help!

I don't know what century I'm in! (I didn't understand most of those!)


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 04:29 PM

#10... 6 months?!?! Ya right... you wish you could afford a computer that would last 6 months... most computers are sitting on the shelf obsolete... and the value of your computer plummets further than the resale value of your car, the moment you walk out the door of the store with it... never mind getting it home... By that time, it's value is about 30% of what it was on the shelf...


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Bill D
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 06:11 PM

I was being facetious about library cards... So far, there is NO comparison between a good library and the WWW. If you need to do serious research and write on a subject and get detail, libraries are essential...but for simple data and factoids and quick overviews, it is astounding what can be found with a good search engine.

You simply do the math...if Google says it has a billion+ web pages, there is a good chance someone has put up a page on how to make chocolate mousse, or information on castles in Bulgaria, or the poetry of e.e. cummings. And as 'experts' add pages on their specialty, you can get more & more detail in many areas. Now that storage is not a big issue, it may be possible to get access to the contents of the worlds libraries someday...and with distributed copies, there is less chance of one fire destroying records.

That being said, there is NOTHING like holding a book or standing in front of an original art work!

I am glad I got to see this technology work in my lifetime, and I just hope that it is never allowed to be 'owned' and controlled by a few big players.


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: GUEST,#1
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 06:34 PM

Traditional songs have been banned on the Mudcat Forum.


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Helen
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 07:09 PM

Misspellings on posters I have seen: Footware sale; cellophone (cellophane) wrapping paper. My favourite "quote" (which may have been made up): a spider on its website.

Standing in a huddle in a big shopping complex swapping mobile phone numbers with sister, niece, 2 nephews before all heading in separate directions, so that we could meet up again for lunch.

Using real money for major purchases is likely to make you a suspect with Federal police.

I don't get No. 6. Echinacea? In chicken soup? To quote a highly caricatured Oz politician: Please explain!

Helen


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 08:47 PM

I know I am living in 2001 because there is someone outside my bedroom window with two dirty great big kettledrums, and somebody seems to have planted a large jet black obelisk at the bottom of our garden!
Wait! what are those flashing lights? - I'll just have a look! - Oh No!!! I t ' s f u l l o f s t a r s !


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 09:31 PM

Geoff: "That being said, there is NOTHING like holding a book or standing in front of an original art work! "

Amen to that!!

"I just hope that it is never allowed to be 'owned' and controlled by a few big players. "

and Amen to that, too!

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Jande
Date: 09 Apr 01 - 10:04 PM

Arrghhh! That should have been attributed to Bill D not Geoff. Sorry!

~ Jande


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 10 Apr 01 - 12:25 AM

I believe the quote is "My GOD... It's full of stars"

But the addition of colour was a neat trick!

;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 10 Apr 01 - 09:06 AM

Jande: I like Technomudgeon! As long as I'm alive the local library will still have a customer. More signs you're in 2001. You worry if your son/daughter has managed to access cybersmut (It used to be my older brother's Playboy magazines). You have a pager, answering machine, voice mail, e-mail and instant messaging and still miss messages. I did the one about directions to an event at Nashiminy State Park near Philidelphia, Pennsylvania and ended up in New Jersey getting or rather trying to get directions from a Pakistani running a Convenience Store. Back to the list. Where you get your gas isn't where you get your car fixed.:-( You take your son and daughter to the following; The school play and the hockey match; Your daughter's the one playing in the hockey match. Instead of dial a prayer you have on line prayer. Now instead of incomprehensible Rock and Roll lyrics (Louie, Louie) You have incomprehensible and disgusting Supposed rock and roll lyrics (Anything by Eminmem) You get your music from napster instead of the record store. (God, I'm dating myself there!;-)) Dubya. Anyway thanks for starting this thread! Kindest reguards, NEil


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: JudeL
Date: 10 Apr 01 - 10:57 AM

Your local bookstore can't get hold of the book you want and suggests you check on the net.

every other day there is some "expert" in the media telling you that something you eat is bad for you

when you fill forms in they have a four figure space for the year

you haven't used your local shop for years

Boots are selling a range of cosmetics aimed at 10 year olds
Kids don't ask for toys for their birthday but the latest computer game or upgrade for their computer.


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 10 Apr 01 - 11:53 AM

Clinton that wasn't a quote that's just what Geoff said before he disappeared!!!!!!!


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: enkd
Date: 10 Apr 01 - 12:25 PM

Got a tune stuck in my head as I was leaving work the other day. I was horrified when I realized it was the sound of my boss's cell phone ringing. (sounded a little like the Close Encounters 5 notes...)


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Subject: RE: BS: Signs We Are Living in 2001
From: Helen
Date: 10 Apr 01 - 07:26 PM

I put this in today's thread about things that go bump in the night, but I think it deserves a mention here too.

http://www.mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=33010&messages=10

Last night I got up in the middle of the night to let the cat out and when I opened the back door I could hear hubby's car alarm going off. It's one of those repeated electronic sounds, like a loud but melodic beeping, with two notes.

I grabbed his keys and ran out of the door, thinking that the neighbours would be ready to kill us by now, with this thing going off for who-knows-how-long in the middle of the night. When I got out the back door and turned right to head for the street I suddenly realised that the noise was down the back yard.

I went down to investigate. Yesterday, here in Newcastle, east coast Oz, we had a full day of persistent rain, which we haven't had for a long time. It had obviously woken up the tiny frogs and they had migrated to our yard. (I haven't heard frogs in our yard in the 3 years that I have lived here, except when I brought a tiny one home from the supermarket. I found it sitting comfortably on a potted plant, so I bought the plant just to rescue the frog.)

Helen


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