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BS: Discarded first drafts
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Mad Maudlin Date: 26 May 01 - 03:53 PM That was cool, Penelope! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: lady penelope Date: 26 May 01 - 07:18 AM Mousetheif, "Zip up your Do Dah!" heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh!!!!! the Wurzels did " Oi got a brand new combined 'arvester, an' oi'll gives thee the key" Wee Willie winky runs thru the town Up stairs, down stairs In his night gown Chucking bricks thru windows Supergluing locks Come Monday morning He'll be in the Dock! Jack Sprat could eat no fat His wife could eat no lean For he was annorexic And she was bolemeaen Mary had a little lamb Its fleece was white a snow And to all the local gentry It was 50 quid a go! Daisy,Dasiy Give me your answer do I'm half crazy All for the love of you It won't be a stylish marriage I can't afford the carriage But you'll look sweet Upon the street When you're turning a trick or two! TTFN M'lady P. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Mad Maudlin Date: 26 May 01 - 06:49 AM Another classic...The Rectangle Game. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Frug Date: 24 May 01 - 05:15 PM And the Stones.....Hey you get off of my foot......Let's spend a quid together.....(I can't get no)Putrefaction ...........Little Red Riding Hood....Brown Hermesetas.... Paint it Turquoise.........etc etc etc |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Stevangelist Date: 24 May 01 - 05:00 PM 'Spaw... "So Long, You're Really An Asshole" I am STILL laughing hysterically... this is the song that my band needed when we left a crappy club time after time... May The Road Rise To Meet You, Stevangelist
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Steve Parkes Date: 24 May 01 - 11:02 AM Marie Lloyd! She was never asked to perform in a Royal Command Performance, despite being popular with Bertie and young George. When she was turned down for the first one, she took it a a snub, and advertised herself thus: "Every Performance of Marie Lloyd is by the Royal Command of the British Public!" Not any tosday could claim that. On the occasion you refer to, Geoff, she was summoned to the Lord Chancellor's Office, which used to censor what went on on stage in those days. She sang "She sits among the cabbages and peas" in a most innocent manner, to demonstrate that there was nothing remotely crude in the song--it was all in the performance. Then she sang "Come into the garden, Maud" and made it sound like Deep Throat (look up the words if you're not sure why!). Of course, the LCO was unmoved, and so a compromise was reached: marie would sing the song as "she sits among the lettuces and leeks"--no double meanings there! I suppose this counts as a genuine discarded first draft! Steve P.S. Don't forget Marie's great songs: "One of the ruins that Capability Brown restored a bit", "The boy I love sits in the front row of the stalls" (the orchestra stalls, of course!), "Oh! Mr Guinness", "My old man said 'here's five bob, get a taxi'" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Geoff the Duck Date: 24 May 01 - 09:34 AM An actual true story relates that a well known female Music Hall singer used to sing a sng entitled "I sits amongst my cabbages and peas", which was full of innuendo and veiled cruduity. On one evening it was known that Royalty was going to attend the show, and the theatre management instructed her that on no account was she to sing that particular song. She reluctantly agreed, but on the night she replaced it with another new song, its title "I sits amongst my lettuces and leeks!!!" Don't you find that truth is often better than fiction! Geoff the Duck! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 24 May 01 - 12:28 AM Okay, here's some more... ---Melanie---
I've got a brand-new pair of rollerblades ---Disney---
Zip Up Your Doo-Dah ---Christmas---
Holly and the Ivy League Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Bert Date: 23 May 01 - 10:17 PM John Henry was a bus driver. Are you Loathsome Tonight. I'm a little bit peculiar in an onion patch. It's Four in the Morning and once more I've gotta go pee. Little white cloud that pissed down with rain. Peg-Peg-Peggy Melinda.
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Amos Date: 23 May 01 - 08:55 PM Let No Man Steal Your Dandelions Horse-Petter Blues Four Occasional Breezes Keep On Pogosticking, Mother! Sitting on the Sidewalk of the Amusement Park Some Routine Afternoon The Girl from the Midwestern Farm So Long, I'm Glad You're Finally Leaving The Good Ship Condom The Rock Island Sort of Squiggle The Wild Colonial Pre-Teen In Antrim town, in the County Down, one morning last July, I Am a Man of Constant Sexual innuendo Black is the Color of My True Love's Moles The Gladiolus of the West Here we come a caroling, among the trash-strewn lanes Twinkle, twinkle, little star, There is a ship, she sails the sea A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: harpmolly Date: 23 May 01 - 07:09 PM ROFLMAO!! This thread ROCKS... but I can't believe no one's gone for Leonard Cohen yet. :)
First I'll Take A Manhattan |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Frug Date: 23 May 01 - 06:18 PM And from the shows...'I am 60 going on 70'....'Mac the Fork'...'Send in the Clones'.....'I got Arhythmmia' and a personal favourite ....'Yank my Doodle it's a Dandy' |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 23 May 01 - 06:07 PM How about songs from Disney Movies?
Zip up Your Doo-Dah Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Geoff the Duck Date: 23 May 01 - 03:29 PM My grandfather's clock was a digital alarm, and it stood every night by his bed. The Hen fell in the midden!
If I was a carpenter, and you were a lady
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: SDShad Date: 23 May 01 - 02:28 PM Uhm...damn...not sure if it's worth summoning a Joe Clone, so:
Miss Otis Forgets Just in case anyone thought that was one song title.... Don't post for a few months, and I forget everything I knew.... S. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 23 May 01 - 02:26 PM This is more fun than kickin' a three-legged dog. ---The Weavers?---
On Top of Old Smokey Bear ---Kingston Trio?---
Hang Down Your Doolie, Tom Head ---Robert Johnson?---
I Believe I'll Dust My Furniture ---Mississippi John Hurt?---
Lovin' Forkfull
More later, I'm sure. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: SDShad Date: 23 May 01 - 02:25 PM Riffing on Cole Porter: Miss Otis Forgets Some of You Just One of Those Thingamajiggies Glove for Sale I've Got You Under My Fingernails Hide My Still In the Night And as long as I'm riffing on American Poplular Song: Fly Me to Khartoum "The Marvelous Toy Safety Council" indeed...*snerk*.... Shad |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Songster Bob Date: 23 May 01 - 02:23 PM Someone mentioned the Stones' "Hey You Get Off of my Lawn." I've heard that the song actually originated as a Scots' song, "Hey, McLeod, Get Off of My Ewe." Bob Clayton
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Jim Dixon Date: 23 May 01 - 02:10 PM "Little girl, little girl, don't lie to me. Tell me where have you been all night? At the mall, at the mall, with my girlfriends, that's all. How come you never trust me?" I Didn't Hear Nobody Call Nine-One-One.
"The last time I saw little Maggie, |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 23 May 01 - 02:04 PM Ouch, Wolfgang! That's harsh! Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Wolfgang Date: 23 May 01 - 02:02 PM and now for the very few: Deutschland, Deutschland, Übel alles Wolfgang |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: catspaw49 Date: 23 May 01 - 01:53 PM Prolific Alex......But your big winner is "Puff, The Magic Drag Queen".....ROTFLMAO!!!!!!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 23 May 01 - 01:50 PM Ooooh, rolling stones. I'll play.
I'm so lukewarm for her
Powdered Sugar ---What about the Monkees?---
Daydream Skeptic ---Donovan?---
Sunshine Batman ---Led Zeppelin?---
Escalator to Purgatory ---Peter, Paul, and Mary?---
Leaving on an Extended D-3 Turboprop
Nuff for now. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 May 01 - 01:27 PM You left a Woody song out, Spaw.. Moderately Attractive Boy Floyd and the there's the Rolling Stones.. Let's Spend Five Bucks Together Gimmee Sheltered Investments I Know It's Only Unlimited Wealth But I Like It Ruby Tubesteak Hey You Get Off of my Lawn I Can't Get No Satisfactory Traction I Miss Youth Beast of Bourbon
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: catspaw49 Date: 23 May 01 - 12:56 PM Oh, let's not forget Woody.........
This Land Is Strictly Patrolled Your turn...... Spaw
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 23 May 01 - 12:06 PM You guys are hilarious! I love this thread! More grist for the mill:
Thomas the Scanner
Some Beatles songs: Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Grab Date: 23 May 01 - 11:26 AM Mary had a little cow They both went round together. But pretty soon that cow was dead And Mary had a jacket of leather. "Come home with me little Matty Groves". "Bugger off you old tart!" "Where has thar bin sin I saw thee?" "In Ilkley town, in the pub." She was just 95 And just barely alive And before too long, I fell in love with her. Cos I'd rather grab a grandmother - OOOOOH When I saw her in her wheelchair. Graham.
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Patrish(inactive) Date: 23 May 01 - 07:26 AM Old McDonald had a small holding
On Ilkley moor baht gloves
notbadcalifragilisticexpialidocious Patrish |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Frug Date: 23 May 01 - 05:51 AM And.......'Take this Spanner'.....'No Woman No Hassle ' .......'Don't Let Your Tyres go Down'......'Parsley, Sage, Garlic and a Stock Cube'.......'If I Were a Bricklayer'...........'Alice's Hot Dog Stand' etc. etc. etc. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Lyndi-loo Date: 23 May 01 - 05:45 AM Lonnie Donegan "My ol man's a chartered accountant Fleetwood Mac "because I need your love a wee bit" "the cleansing of George's cowshed" "over the sea to the Isle of Wight" T"The mountains of Norfolk" and that good ol Welsh one "Men of Llantwit Major" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: SeanM Date: 23 May 01 - 04:34 AM "Oh they're moving father's grave Because he isn't dead and decided to get cremated after we paid for this bloody expensive crypt" "There's a neat little still at the base of the hill With a drunk pissing into the stream nearby..." "Where have you been all day, Henry me son?" "I've been stuck under a semi..." "You load sixteen tons, and what do you get? A nice fat payraise on your next paycheck" "'Twas a Friday Morn, when we set sail And we were not far from the land, When the captain he espied the port we sailed for So he we should prepare to sell our cargo and then buy more" How DID some of these ideas ever get missed? The Dylan ones almost made me spray my glass of water... M |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: GUEST,Roger the skiffler Date: 23 May 01 - 04:27 AM If I was wearing one, I'd take my hat off to everyone! I am not worthy to be in your company! I now know how Pandora felt when she opened the box! One more: Make me a pallet on the ceiling RtS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Crazy Eddie Date: 23 May 01 - 04:13 AM "Frankie & Johnny were just good friends......" "I left my liver in San Francisco" "When I was a lad, old Goldie was a gold-fish....." "Ghost Riders in the bath-tub" "Kind, Kind, Leroy Brown....." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Mad Maudlin Date: 23 May 01 - 03:06 AM Leopard Skin Pork-Pie Hat? Spaw,this made it worth getting up and it saved my morning! Almost snorted my tea all over the screen... TCOMN! (Tea Coming Out My Nose):-))) Nathalie, still chuckling |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Lonesome EJ Date: 23 May 01 - 12:58 AM Funny stuff, Spaw! how about Watching the River Overflow Stuck Inside of Cincy with the Newport Blues Again All Along she just wanted to sell me The Watchtower A Mild Drizzle's A-gonna Fall Quinn the Aleut Maggie's Farm-fresh Eggs If Not for You I wouldn't Have This Thing on my Lip Just Like Frankie Forefinger's Blues Tonight I'll Be Staying in the Loo I'll Be Your Rabbi Tonight |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Troll Date: 23 May 01 - 12:48 AM "Plain Vanilla" may be a bit obscure. Think Richard Penneman. troll |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Troll Date: 23 May 01 - 12:46 AM Alas my love, you have done me dirt You have sewn greensleeves on my purple shirt... You Ain't Nothin' But A Goldfish Great Balls Of Chocolate Plain Vanilla All My Oatmeal Brown Leather Shoes I Walk The Sidewalk. troll |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Amos Date: 23 May 01 - 12:31 AM Visions of JOEOFFER!!!!!?????? Spaw I have GOT to have a MIDI of that. Who's got the lyrics!!!??? I'll pay any price!! ROTFLMAO!! A |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: catspaw49 Date: 22 May 01 - 11:41 PM In the most recent Dylan biography, it has finally come to light that Bob had a lot of trouble in this area.
All I Really Want To Do Is Crap Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 22 May 01 - 05:49 PM Good Morning, Irene Delia's Still Here Carolina in the Cedars Me and You and a Cat named Fluffy The Train They Call the 9:15 Interurban Special ...Almost heaven, north New Jersey alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 22 May 01 - 05:43 PM As Bob Dylan never wrote, and Jimi Hendrix never sang,
There must be some kind of way out of here Alex |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Mountain Dog Date: 22 May 01 - 05:32 PM "Scientology Got My Woman" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 22 May 01 - 12:48 PM Actually I think the original was by Andrew Carnegie, and went: This land is my land, this land is my land..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Don Firth Date: 22 May 01 - 12:47 PM It takes a horny man to sing a horny song. . . . (Hmm . . . that still has potential. . . .) Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Bert Date: 22 May 01 - 12:44 PM My Ex-Brother-in-law used to swear that the original Eenglish version went... This Land is Your Land, This Land is My Land From Stoke-Poges to Canvey Island... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Lonesome EJ Date: 22 May 01 - 12:41 PM Mousethief, many don't even realize that the original title of Don McClean's song was Hello Miss Armenian Pop-over.
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Bert Date: 22 May 01 - 12:40 PM I told my love to take a hike. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: mousethief Date: 22 May 01 - 12:37 PM Avast, my love, you do me right? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: Don Firth Date: 22 May 01 - 12:32 PM Greennickers? Don Firth |
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Subject: RE: BS: Discarded first drafts From: GUEST Date: 22 May 01 - 12:21 PM Oh No John, No John, Maybe John, Yes!
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