Lyr req: Ockle Cockle Maker (monologue)

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 28 Sep 20 - 07:19 AM

A bit like The Kush Maker as recited by Bert Lloyd.

Dave H

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: GUEST,The Limey
Date: 26 Sep 20 - 09:52 PM

It was on the BBC about 50 years ago.
Cyril Fletcher, comedian and specialist in odd voices, best known for his "Odd Odes", was the man!

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Madam Gashee
Date: 27 Sep 01 - 03:59 AM

Thanks for looking anyway.

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Greyeyes
Date: 27 Sep 01 - 03:42 AM

Sorry, no luck.

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: catspaw49
Date: 26 Sep 01 - 01:43 PM

Personally, I'm real satisfied with the joke.....LMAO!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Greyeyes
Date: 26 Sep 01 - 10:10 AM

My library has a double cassette of Marriott Edgar monologues. Unfortunately it's not indexed. I'll take it home tonight and listen to it in the car, if the one you're looking for is on it I'll transcribe it for you.

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Madam Gashee
Date: 25 Sep 01 - 11:30 AM

Thanks for that link Steve, but I'd already been there with no joy. Still at least i've a different title to work from now so thanks for that. Does nobody out there know this monologue?

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 25 Sep 01 - 08:03 AM

There's a ton of stuff here, but not the one you want. If you search on "Marriott Edgar" or "Stanley Holloway" you'll find references to books of monologues, but you might have to buy them all to find it! Or you could try your local library, but there's always the danger they'll think you're barmy ...

Steve

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Madam Gashee
Date: 25 Sep 01 - 06:10 AM

Thanks everyone. It isn't the joke form i'm looking from it's the monologue based on the same story. It does sound like the one you mention Steve. Is it available anywhere in print?

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: IanC
Date: 25 Sep 01 - 05:32 AM

Here's the story from here.

The captain of a Navy ship was going over the register of men newly posted to his command when he came across an entry saying Seaman first class Caleb Winters, trade: Ockle Cockle maker. Not wanting to appear ignorant in front of his first officer, he said "I'm sure glad they sent us one of those we may need him sometime." The first officer ,not wanting to show his ignorance said "I figured they wouldn't leave us without one for too much longer, I'll have the bosun show him to the machine shop and have him go to work." The word got around that Caleb was hard at work making an Ockle Cockle. The officers and crew, all curious but none wanting to show their ignorance would pass by the machine shop and hear sounds of sawing and hammering and sanding for hours each day. But Caleb kept the door locked so no one pressed the matter, not wanting to show their ignorance, you know. Weeks passed and the ship sailed on. Then one day Caleb announced to the Bosun that the Ockle Cockle was finally finished. The Bosun told number one and number one told the Captain who ordered all hands to be be on the after deck the next morning for the unveiling of the Ockle Cockle. All agog, Captain and crew gathered on the fantail and Caleb appeared from the machine shop holding the Ockle Cockle in his hands and presented it to the Captain. It was a wooden box, a cube of one foot per side, exquisitely finished and highly polished to a brilliant shine and it had a hole one inch in diameter on one side. The Captain looked at the box for a long time and said "Seaman, this is the best Ockle Cockle I've ever seen , you are to be congratulated." Then he leaned closer to Caleb and practically whispered, "What does it do?" Caleb, looking a little surprised at the Captain's ignorance, said "let me show you," and he took the box from the Captain and threw it overboard and it sank slowly going, ockle cockle, ockle cockle, ockle cockle, ockle cockle.

Subject: RE: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 25 Sep 01 - 05:20 AM

I've seen this in print, around 1977 (Silver Jubilee time). The Marriott Edgar version was "The guggle box", I think: six inches wide by six inches tall, just six inches overall; with a hole, and no matter how much he tried, he just couldn't get his hand inside ... is that the one? It's the same story. Sorry I don't know any more.

Steve

Subject: Ockle Cockle Maker
From: Madam Gashee
Date: 25 Sep 01 - 05:09 AM

I'm looking for the words to a monologue that was told to a friend of mine in the early 40's. It was called "The Ockle Cockle Maker". It was in the same ilk as Albert & such monologues. Can anyone help?