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BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time!
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Subject: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:34 PM Okay, here's the deal. You've all heard 'em in a thousand horse operas...movies, comics, western novels, folk songs, etc...classic cowboy sayings. There are lots of 'em. So come up with your nomination for the most classic cowboy saying, the most well-worn cowboy cliche you can think of, and post it here. If you can also indicate which movie OR book it FIRST appeared in, you get a free year's membership in the WSSBA, and my eternal admiration besides! What a deal, eh? Here's my nomination: "This town ain't big enough fer the two of us!" (I have no idea which movie it first appeared in, or which book, but it's a beauty, eh? I once saw an issue of Mad Magazine or something in which the villain said this to the hero. The hero, being a liberal and peace-loving type of feelgood pacifistic guy, looked around in great concern at the town, sizing it up. He then, exerting tremendous effort, managed to push the buildings on both sides of Main Street back a good twenty feet...assisted by the fact that they were those phony Hollywood sets without a real building behind them. The bad guy watched, wondering what the hell he was up to. The hero walked back, wiping his brown, and said "How's that? Better?" Bad guy was not amused...the hero, with great regret had to gun him down 2 panels later, cos that's what bad guys are there for, after all!) Cowboys aren't near as popular as they once were, so you will be helping to keep an important folk tradition alive by participating... (s-t-r-e-t-c----h!) - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:36 PM ...wiping his "brow", I mean... YEE-Haw! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Bill D Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:39 PM Head 'em off at the pass! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Larry124 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:41 PM "...(anything), Pilgrim." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:44 PM Yes, Bill! That is one of the absolute CLASSICS! But where did it first appear in film? Larry - That one had to start with John Wayne, right? - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Uncle_DaveO Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:51 PM Of course, Git out of town by sundown! and Smile when you say that, pardner! Dave Oesterreich |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Sorcha Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:56 PM REACH FOR THE SKY, PODNER!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:56 PM "What's a dashing urbanite like you doing in a rustic setting like this?"......Gene Wilder as The Waco Kid in Blazing Saddles. Here is a really good site for all of us old saddle pals......CLICK HERE Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:57 PM Side kick... "Injuns, we're under attack!!" The Duke Line those wagons up in a circle there pilgrim! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: 53 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:57 PM yo, boy. BOB |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 02:58 PM Good, Dave! 2 more beauties. But no one's earned their free year in the WSSBA yet. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:02 PM Bullshit Hawk.....I gave all the data except the year (1974), but I don't want the membership.....Thanks anyway...... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:03 PM Nice site, Spaw! Check out the "Bad Guys" pics... - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Justa Picker Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:04 PM "Yutchez ("Judges"), we don' need no stinkin' yutchez!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Fortunato Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:07 PM Marlon Brando in the One-Eyed Jacks (1961): "You tub of guts." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:07 PM Whaddya mean you don't want the membership! What kind of lunatic are you? There are people who would kill for what I've offered here, fer Chrissake...well, maybe not a whole lot of 'em, but...some o' them varmints will kill fer just about excuse. I posted that one afore I seen yer entry, so don't git yer dander up, Pilgrim! - LH
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:08 PM "Bar keep! Gimme a shot of Red Eye." "I paid my two bits to see Fearless Freep and I'm a gonna SEE Fearless Freep!!" "Hold on Thar! Babba Louie!!" "The Cavalry is comming!" "I'm a taken' you in!" "You're breath smells so bat you could knock a buzzard off a S*** Wagon." "Dying ain't much of a way to make a living." Clint Eastwood |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: katlaughing Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:08 PM Actually, DaveO, if you are quoting Wister's "Virginian" when he was speaking to the nefarious Trampas, it was:
THIS ONE has some pretty good ones, too. Great thread!! kat |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:09 PM Boy, if Brando said that to anyone these days there would be hell to pay...although Brando has never been one to shrink from controversy. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Fortunato Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:12 PM John Wayne, Rooster Cogburn (1976): "Fill your hand, you miserable son of a bitch." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:13 PM Nice site too, Kat! I have to hit the road in about 2 minutes, so's y'all carry on without me! - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:21 PM I liked George Carlin's bit about substituting the word fuck for kill in the old movie cliches............ Okay Sheriff.....I'm gonna' fuck ya' now." Also, the line from "Blazing Saddles" ---'BADGES? We don't need no stinkin badges." has been ripped about a hudred ways from sideways since the movie came out, like JP above with, "Yutchez ("Judges"), we don' need no stinkin' yutchez!" BUT THE QUESTION IS: What movie was Mel Brooks ripping off with that line? Spaw
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Bardford Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:30 PM er- Treasure of the Sierra Madres, perhaps? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,mkebenn@work Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:30 PM Treasure of the siera madre? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:33 PM Easier than I figured.....Great job guys!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:33 PM "Badges! We don' need no steenking badges!" was from the "Treasure of Sierra Madre" Not technically a "Western" but on eof my favorite moves of all time. My favorite line from a western is more current. Doc Holiday to Wyatt Erp in Tombstone. "Wyatt, I stand corrected, You are an Oak." Follow closely by "I'll be your huckleberry." Holiday again, same movie. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Donuel Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:33 PM We're gonna round up a posse, track em down, smoke em out an'bringem back dead or alive. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Kim C Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:37 PM Howdy, Stranger. I'm callin you out. (both of these from any movie/tv show you can think of) Beans is safer. (this is from that movie where Rock Hudson plays a Confederate officer and they're going down to Mexico so's they don't have to surrender... I can't remember the name of it...) My favorites from Lonesome Dove: Can't stand rudeness in a man. Won't tolerate it. I can whack that bell if I want to. She's in hell, where I sent her. It ain't no crime to whack a surly bartender. Give that whore ten dollars and tell her to keep playin. I won't say I did, and I won't say I didn't, but I will say this: any man that won't cheat for a poke don't want one bad enough. From Tombstone: Why, Wyatt Earp, does this mean we're not friends anymore? Q. Is that Old Dog Tray......... you know....... Stephen f*****g Foster? A. No, it's Frederic f*****g Chopin. I'll be your huckleberry. And of course, a couple favorites from Blazing Saddles: I don't pay y'all to dance around like a bunch of Kansas City faggots! (my personal favorite) I think he said, the sheriff is near! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Midchuck Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:37 PM Actually, it's "We don't got to show you no steenking badges."....I theenk. Peter. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:38 PM Never squat with yer spurs on ! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Peter T. Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:40 PM My favourite:
"It's good country, God's country, where a man can be free without interference, and we are going to make something of it with our own bare hands, once we finally get the army to eradicate those Indian vermin, push the homesteaders off of good cattle land with muscle and lawyers, convince the Federal government to give us water rights and mineral rights in perpetuity, and reap the rewards of massively subsidized railway building. O.K. boys, saddle up -- take 'em to Missouri." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: katlaughing Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:40 PM "say yer prayers" "let's string 'em up" "Hang 'im...hang 'im high" "start dancin'" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Jack the Sailor Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:42 PM "We're gonna smoke 'em out of their caves." Cowboy Dubya "They are an evil empire." Cowboy Ron |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: X Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:43 PM "You hold the stool while I move the horse's tail." |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: John MacKenzie Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:48 PM "Get off yer hoss an drink yer milk" Jock |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,Wesley Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:54 PM Jack Crabbe to General Custer - "You go down there" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: bill\sables Date: 09 Nov 01 - 03:55 PM "I've come for my Paw" Might have come from a Lassie movie |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,Wesley Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:02 PM I forgot one of my favorites - Kris Kristofferson as Billy the Kid to one of his captors : "Keep the change, Bob". |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: bill\sables Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:05 PM "I've come for my Paw" Probably from a Lassie movie. "Hi stranger, these bad men are trying to move my Uncle Ben off of his ranch" Hopalong Cassidy almost every episode. "Woof Woof", "What's that you said Lassie, Young Joey is trapped in the old mine" OK we'd better get there fast, Show us the way" All Lassie episodes "Hio Silver Away" and "Who was that masked man Uncle Jess" Well I don't rightly know but I'm sure glad he showed up when he did" Every Lone Ranger episode. Bill |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: katlaughing Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:05 PM Here are some real old West quotes, including some of my favs by Calamity Jane, Belle Starr, and the real Tom Horn, who said, "I have no stomach for it," when he resigned from being a lawman. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:12 PM And how can we leave out.......... SHANE......SHANE.......COME BACK SHANE Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:13 PM Don't know the name of the movie but the quote is: Howdy Mam, you sure are a purty lil' filly! Wanna daince? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Ma-K Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:40 PM draw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Midchuck Date: 09 Nov 01 - 04:56 PM 'Spaw said: And how can we leave out.......... SHANE......SHANE.......COME BACK SHANE And for 1000 extra credit points, elucidate the relationship between that line and Gram Parsons' In My Hour of Darkness. Peter. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Mark Clark Date: 09 Nov 01 - 05:39 PM The Treasure of Sierra Madre also gave us the oft quoted line: “Yeah... that's the ticket.” And don't forget Gabby Hayes famous line: “Why you low down stinkin' sidewinder.” - Mark |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: okthen Date: 09 Nov 01 - 06:39 PM It's an old trick........ |
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Subject: Lyr Add: IN MY HOUR OF DARKNESS (Parsons/Harris) From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 06:44 PM Gotcha' Midchuck.......The song was written about three dead friends of his....Sid Keiser, Clarence White, and Brandon de Wilde, who played the little boy in "Shane"....and screamed that famous line at the end.
In My Hour Of Darkness
In my hour of darkness
Once I knew a young man
In my hour of darkness
Another young man safely strummed his silver string guitar
In my hour of darkness
Then there was an old man
In my hour of darkness
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: SINSULL Date: 09 Nov 01 - 06:55 PM Ma'am. You sure are purdy when you're angry. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: SINSULL Date: 09 Nov 01 - 06:59 PM And of course: "She's dead, Little Joe" (or Hoss or Adam or Paw - no woman ever survived long enough to marry any of them). |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Amos Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:05 PM Wait for meeeee, Willld Bill!!! -- Jingles (Andy Devine) "A man's gotta do whut a man's gotta do!" -- About 350 different corny Westerns "You ornery polecat!" -- Ibid "What you mean we, white man?" -- About 100 bad Lone Ranger jokes |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Gareth Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:11 PM "Torn between love and duty " When both hands are straught up !! Gareth
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: mmm1a Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:18 PM I can't belive no one mentioned Roy Rogers and Dale Evens singing HAPPY TRAILS TO YOU MMM |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: RangerSteve Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:22 PM Shucks, Ma'am, 'twarn't nothin'. You could really wear out your apostrophe key writin' cowboy lines. The Sierra Madre line is more like (without the Mexican accent)"Badges? We don't have no badges. We don't need no badges. WE DON'T HAVE TO SHOW YOU NO STINKING BADGES!!" White man speak with forked tongue. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Paul from Hull Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:32 PM "As you may have gathered, I'm not from around these parts...." *G* |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Donuel Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:37 PM He skiddaddled liken a cat ona hot tin roof witha piecea raw liver inis mouth. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Tweed Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:38 PM Bold talk..For a one-eyed Fat Man! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Paul from Hull Date: 09 Nov 01 - 07:49 PM "P*ss on you! Ah'm werkin fer Mel Brooks!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: katlaughing Date: 09 Nov 01 - 08:10 PM Sins, then there was the great reworking of that in that Richard Dreyfuss movie, when the young smokejumper imitates John Wayne and says, "You're mighty perdee when yer angry, wah-hah!" We all had that down in nothing flat! Do ya think Miss Kitty and Marshall Dillon ever went upstairs together?**BG** |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Bill D Date: 09 Nov 01 - 08:19 PM "The whole shovel full, Miss Kitty?" -Chester, in an obscene joke..843 extra points for the original |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Mary in Kentucky Date: 09 Nov 01 - 08:55 PM "You can't be a cowboy forever." --- Monty Walsh |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 09:27 PM One morning in Dodge City, Chester wakes up with a huge erection. Not knowing what to do, he consults Marshall Dillion. "Marshall, Marshall .... I woke up with a hard-on and don't know whut ta do!!". Marshall Dillon tells Chester, "Well, go out to the stables and shovel manure for a while and that should take care of it". So Chester begins shoveling. After a while, Miss Kitty comes walking by and asks "Chester, "What are you doing?". "Well, Miss Kitty, I woke up with a hard-on and I didn't know whut ta do with it. Marshall Dillon told me to come out here and shovel manure for a while." Raising her dress enough to expose herself Miss Kitty exclaims, "Why don't you just stick it in here, Chester?" Chester says "The whole shovel full, Miss Kitty??" So were are my 843 points....PLUS the 1000 I get for Midchuck's Brandon de Wilde reference????????? Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 09:28 PM That's "WHERE" are my 843 points plus the 1000 etc...... Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: SINSULL Date: 09 Nov 01 - 10:01 PM Keep digging Spaw. There's got to be a pony in there somewhere. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: katlaughing Date: 09 Nov 01 - 10:06 PM Holy Cow, Spaw, is there NOTHING you don't remember?!! Whoo-Haw fer Spaw!!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 09 Nov 01 - 10:10 PM So do I get any points for knowing this old one too Sins? Okay, so a couple have this pair of twins, one an optimist and one a pessimist. The parents attempt to cure them one Christmas by filling the optimist's room with horse manure and leaving hundreds of new toys in the pessimist's room. On Christmas morning, there's the pessimist sitting in a pile of broken and discarded toys, bawling his eyes out, while the optimist is laughing and merrily shoveling shit into a giant pile. When his parents ask why, the optimist says brightly: "Look at all this manure! There's got to be a pony in there somewhere!" ********************************************************** How many points? Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Allan C. Date: 09 Nov 01 - 10:48 PM "Shucks, Roy!" - Gabby Hayes (pick a movie) "Yo Rinty!" - Corporal Rusty in "Rin Tin Tin" (TV series) "Whoa, Nellybelle!" - Pat Brady (Roy's TV sidekick long after Gabby died) speaking to his jeep. "Kiowa!" (or insert the "fierce" tribe of your choice) - said by everyone when examining an arrow they just ripped out of a corpse or from the wooden side of the wagon, stagecoach or whatever. "Pahoo!" - Usually shouted by Yancy Derringer just before X Brands produces a weapon from out of nowhere and nails Yancy's would-be assailant. "It means, 'Faithful Friend'." - Tonto |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: heric Date: 09 Nov 01 - 10:54 PM "We don't need to win. We just need to fight." William Wallace's Pa. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: heric Date: 09 Nov 01 - 10:56 PM "I don't think it's very nice, you being rude to that mule like that." Clint |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Bill D Date: 09 Nov 01 - 11:07 PM *shaking my head in wonder*....I surrender, 'spaw.. (but that Kierkegaard routine on the other thread was more like Sartré...Kierkegaard didn't run in circles like that) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Peter Kasin Date: 09 Nov 01 - 11:08 PM Will Rogers, Sr. on Calvin Coolidge: "Calvin Coolidge was one of our greatest presidents. He never did anything, but that's what we wanted anyway!"
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Dicho (Frank Staplin) Date: 09 Nov 01 - 11:51 PM I ain't a deceiver of women. Been punchin' cattle long? Wake up, judge. Your jury has gone dry again. I'm grass-bellied with spot cash! Chewin's no good at meals. (from Owen Wister) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 10 Nov 01 - 12:13 AM Bill ... I think you're right. Does kinda' read like Sartre doesn't it? Kierkegaard wasn't circular it's true, but he thought/wrote in an odd pattern that kept bringing his original thought back as a check-in against each level he built. Instead of building 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8, he tended to do something not quite circular but odd nonetheless like 1-2-1-3-1-4-1-5-1-6-1-7-1-8-1. Anyway, who gives a damn, he wasn't a cowboy.............. One of the funniest scenes in any "western" was a real classic. These cowboys are always riding somewhere or another that's 500 or 1000 miles away and you see the beginning and end with maybe a campfire scene. In "The Cheyenne Social Club" Jimmy Stewart and Henry Fonda ride from Texas to Cheyenne and they show them riding through all kinds of terrain and weather while Henry Fonda talks on and on, finally retelling the same stories over and over until Stewart stops him. You have to see the film, it's really good and very funny and the scene I'm talking about is hard to explain but funnier than hell in the film. Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: SINSULL Date: 10 Nov 01 - 12:23 AM Spaw, You and I attended one motivational seminar too many. 1000 points. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 10 Nov 01 - 12:28 AM You're probably right Sins. Sales and motivational snorers, er, uh...seminars......oy........HEY!!! Here's one for you based on the sales seminar idea: "The dogs don't like it." Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Bert Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:22 AM Let's went Cisco. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:41 AM THE SHORT HOSE IS SOON CURRIED !!!!!!!!!! (art thieme) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:47 AM (first line of a song possibly about a train in Kansas) Pardon me Roy, is that the cat that chewed your new shoes ? (art thieme) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:48 AM "Gat 'em up, Scout !" (art thieme) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:53 AM "It' so cold. Can we sleep together, Hoppy?" "Only if you polish my boots and my saddle horn, California!" (art thieme)
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Jim Dixon Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:56 AM "Who was that masked man?" "Oh, Cisco!" ... "Oh, Pancho!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:08 AM Virgin wool is from any sheep that can outrun the Mormons and the Republicans. "My God, your chaps don't have any crotch ! What's that all about?" "That cow in the boxcar is a bum steer !!!" "Heifer joke is better than none !" "Eat shit !" (a member of the Donner party) "A cowboy is anyone whose mother was a cow." (U.U.Phillips) "Batman is anyone who, when a child, was a bat boy." (thread creep from A. Thieme) Do I hear votes for more music threads? ***{{{[[[ART THIEME{{{}}}*** |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:15 AM That ought to read, "The short HORSE is soon curried-----not HOSE. (But I did know a Mexican fireman (in the west) who named his first kid Jose. (The next kid was named Hose-B.)
art |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:22 AM Art, I sat here chuckling and grinning with appreciation as I read through your postings................until I got to the Donner party thing and I friggin' fell out of my chair!!!! Completely lost it!! Just great........Eat shit.......literally ROTFLMAO!!!!!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:31 AM "He never was one to divest himself of a garment just 'cause it had some age on it." my favorite from Lonesome Dove art thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:35 AM SHOULD'VE been in Lonesome Dove: Augustus McRae says when they ask if they can cut off his other leg, "Quit askin' me those stupid questions 'cause ya can't stump me !!!!" Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: harpgirl Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:49 AM ...ya can't what, Stumpie? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: harpgirl Date: 10 Nov 01 - 03:01 AM "Holy cow, it's Blue Duck!" Said by Belle Starr when her husband took a triple dose of viagra... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: harpgirl Date: 10 Nov 01 - 03:03 AM ...geez, even Art has finally gone to bed. Guess I'll turn in ma self.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 03:03 AM Once upon a time, out in Wyoming, an Indian named Cat Laughing had a father who was a good singer of range ballads and he was known throughout the Western territories as Cat's Pa. "Why are you called that?--she said. And he answered, "Cause it'd've been dumb to call me "Huutspah" (or however that yiddish word is spelled)!! Now, she always thought that Native-Americans got there names by what their mothers saw first after giving birth. That's why one of her brothers was named Two Dogs F...... "Wait a minute" she yelled. "I ain't gonna touch that with a ten foot Polish person." "Where the hell is this diatribe going?" "Well, if the tribe needs to loose weight, a diet tribe might do the trick." "And, yes, The squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sums of the squaws of the other two hides !" She resonded with that old cowboy line and all-around good pun: "Haifa lootin', Newton shootin', son of a nun from Barcelona, part time plowboy, Joe." "This is dumb"--she said. And I agreed. So we all rode into the sunset... Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 03:17 AM Harp---I didn't go to bed. I was busy trying to write "HOOOTSPAAH" (and polishing my saddle horn). How are you, kid. I can't sleep. Just needed silly diversion tonight. Too much heavy goin' down and the doc won't let me drink. May try to see if that diet tribe will accept me. Will P.M. you one o' these days when stuff is cleaned off the fan. (Pardon the thread creep.) Sleep tight. A. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 03:18 AM Harp---I didn't go to bed. I was busy trying to write "HOOOTSPAAH" (and polishing my saddle horn). How are you, kid. I can't sleep. Just needed silly diversion tonight. Too much heavy goin' down and the doc won't let me drink. May try to see if that diet tribe will accept me. Will P.M. you one o' these days when stuff is cleaned off the fan. (Pardon the thread creep.) Sleep tight. A. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 10 Nov 01 - 03:22 AM Didn't mean to do that---double post I mean. (Yeah, one Jim Post is enough !) I am tired... A.t. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: The Walrus Date: 10 Nov 01 - 07:00 AM Not strictly a cowboy saying, but how about
"I don't like it, it's too quiet" At which point, of course, the speaker promptly turns into a human pin-cushion (how can the injuns always tell who said it and when?).
I'm surprised that nobody has mentioned
"A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do" Walrus
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: catspaw49 Date: 10 Nov 01 - 08:17 AM As the nearsighted cowboy said after some target practice, "Holy Cow." I haven't seen Mr. Thieme this wired in many a moon!!!! The Master Punster is alive and and completely sick!!!! Great stuff Art......simply GREAT!!! Spaw |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,pete Date: 10 Nov 01 - 12:45 PM Stick ya hands up, ya bum (don't forget the comma) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,colwyn dane Date: 10 Nov 01 - 01:57 PM 'The Sheriff of Fractured Jaw' Directed by Raoul Walsh has Kenneth More in the role of heir to firm of English gunsmiths and he is advised to go out West to drum up business by his father(played by Robert Morley):
'There's some frightful female there called Jessie James and she's shooting at everyone.'
'Custer is dead'
'Come and see a fat old man sometime!' CD |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: X Date: 10 Nov 01 - 02:01 PM "Do not forsake me, oh my darling... High Noon |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,colwyn dane Date: 10 Nov 01 - 06:22 PM 'When the legend becomes fact, print the legend.'
---'The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance'
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Charley Noble Date: 10 Nov 01 - 07:06 PM SNORT, SNORT! "Steady, Big Feller!" The Lone Ranger Why do we feed these threads?;-) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Midchuck Date: 10 Nov 01 - 07:37 PM And a brand new one that my daughter sent me: "I kinda like it down here in my hole,' said Big Jim, 'I can't see the twentieth century from it. It's a good hole and I feel comfortable down here. Nice deposits. It soothes me. Why, tens of thousands of years from now when that fucking mess at Big Sky is excavated and archaeologists are puzzling over what will doubtless be known as the Bad Taste Culture I won't be here. But they will." The Stick Game Peter Bowen |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 10 Nov 01 - 07:46 PM "Ya got it comin, but I'm not gonna hit ya. No, I'm not gonna hit ya. Ah, the hell I'm not!" Whap! -Marion "The Duke" Morrison Paul Newman - "What kinda rules are we gonna have?" Big Ugly Guy - "Rules!? In a knife fight!?" Bends over laughing. Newman kicks him in the balls. Newman - "Well, if there ain't gonna be no rules, lets get on with the fight." Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid Also from Butch and Sundance "who ARE those guys?!",and the scene when they have to jump off the cliff into the creek. Sundance hesitates and says "I can't swim, Butch." Then Newman says "Swim! Hell, the fall'll kill you!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Amos Date: 10 Nov 01 - 07:47 PM Walrus, check 09-Nov-01 - 07:05 PM . A. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Linda Kelly Date: 10 Nov 01 - 07:55 PM 'Fill your hand, you sonnofabitch!' and the infamous 'Dead or Alive -I'm coming to getcha!' |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Lin in Kansas Date: 10 Nov 01 - 08:13 PM Lonesome EJ--I had my fingers poised over my keyboard to type those immortal lines from Butch Cassidy when I got to your post--rats!!! you beat me to 'em!! But...we must also add: OH, S-H-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-!!!!!!!!!! used by Gene Wilder in "The Cisco Kid", while a very young Harrison Ford screamed OY VEY!!!! (also while jumping off a cliff) Lin |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: JohnInKansas Date: 10 Nov 01 - 09:08 PM I've always had fond memories from a line in the John Wayne movie Big Jake. The Duke (Jake) is sitting on his horse next to his sort-of post-adolescent son. Son makes some s.a. remark. Right as the son hits the dirt - propelled off his horse by "Big Jakes" bootheel, the line - "If y' can't respect yer elders, y' can at least respect yer betters." But then I have children too. John |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 11 Nov 01 - 12:24 AM Finally back after the visit to Toronto... My, my, you folks've been busy...mighty busy. Ah'm plumb im-pressed, Ah shorely am. Here are some ya done missed, though... "VAMOOSE! Yew ornery sidewinder..." "Skeedaddle! Yew no-account varmint..." "He died with his boots on." (Well, duh! Who fights a gunfight in his stocking feet?) "Hey, Hombre..." "Thar's a stranger in town!" (Dum-Da-Dum-Dum!!!) And last, but not least... *** DRAW!!! **** And, of course, *** Slap leather! *** (The guys who yelled "Draw!" usually had the edge, cos it takes longer to yell "Slap leather!" Thus, as time went by, "Draw!" became the predominant expression, boot hill being full of graves containing the "mortal remains" of people whose last words had been "Slap lea----" or in some cases just "Sla---") FAMOUS WESTERN MUSIC CLICHES: Remember those piano chords they used to play when the Indians would appear on the next ridge! What were those chords? In WWII movies a similar musical riff was used whenever the Japanese would appear on the horizon, but it was more "eastern" sounding as opposed to western. What were those chords? The Walrus pointed out: "I don't like it, it's too quiet" At which point, of course, the speaker promptly turns into a human pin-cushion (how can the injuns always tell who said it and when?). Wal, Walrus, them injuns has some downright spooky powers what ain't rightly Christian, and they KNOWS whut yer thinkin' afore ya even breaks wind. They's got their own idee 'bout when ta fight and when ta lay low, and they's a sneaky buncha varmints, thet's fer sure. Why, them red devils has been knowed ta wait half the night fer some sodbuster t' say "Ah don't like it, it's too quiet...", jest so's they kin fill the pore soul full of arrows raght then and there, jest fer spite... As a former Indian (previous life), I can vouch for the truth of this. In one incident I clearly recall, I and the other 30 or so braves in our party spent a stupefying eight hours in the cold and dark with our bowstrings stretched taut till our arms were damn near falling off...and what do we hear? Gossip about the whores in El Paso. Complaints about the long hours and low pay. Complaints about the son-of-a-bitch trail boss. Complaints about the lousy food. Whining, griping, belching, and spitting from these stinking cowboys...BUT NOT ONE WORD ABOUT IT BEING "too quiet". Unbelievable! Finally, at about 4:45 AM this cowpoke with a prominent Adams apple and a face only a mother can love scratches his crotch for the 85th time and says "I don't like it, it's too quiet out there." Geronimo!!! We filled that sucker so full of arrows, it would have made a porcupine look butt naked. We took no prisoners. We were fed up with that outfit. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Lin in Kansas Date: 11 Nov 01 - 02:03 AM And Gene Wilder (again), sitting with arms crossed in the jail, speaking to Clevon Little:
"Wanta see my fast draw?" Blazing Saddles of course. Lin |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 11 Nov 01 - 11:15 AM "One in the hand is worth two George Bushes." (from a fiend of mine out west who was a master at bating hooks.) Art |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: VoxFox Date: 11 Nov 01 - 01:51 PM "Ya Reckin'?" - just about any cowboy show. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 11 Nov 01 - 02:00 PM Most of these are male cliches, but here's a female one... Dance Hall girl/whore with a heart of gold/southern belle type is given an admiring compliment by cowpoke...who is normally a man of few words. She gazes back at him, fanning herself, and says, breathily..."D' yew meyen thayat?" - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Bat Goddess Date: 11 Nov 01 - 02:31 PM "I ain't much for words, ma'am, but would you mind backin' yore wagon offa my foot." "See the arrow in Sargeant O'Hara's back? See the color of the feathers? That can mean only one thing: Sargeant O'Hara is dead." "I don't do much rustlin' cepten when I wear taffeta shorts." Haven't a clue where I got these (Mad Magazine?!?) but I've been quoting them since I was knee high to a coin operated horsie. Bat Goddess |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: John MacKenzie Date: 11 Nov 01 - 03:28 PM Chutzpah? Jock |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Donuel Date: 11 Nov 01 - 04:07 PM Killin a man is like stealing everything he ever had and everything he coulda had. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: robomatic Date: 11 Nov 01 - 04:42 PM "Shalom Aleichem!" - Cat Ballou "This is Bill, the Buffalo Butcher" "That's Buffalo HUNTER!" "You have to HUNT 'em?" -Evil Roy Slade |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 11 Nov 01 - 05:27 PM "plug 'em and plant 'em" - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: okthen Date: 11 Nov 01 - 05:47 PM "........but it just might work" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,Lyle Date: 11 Nov 01 - 09:29 PM From Blazing Saddles: Madeline Kahn Says to Cleavon Little (After she serves him a 12 inch sausage and the lights go out) "Is it twue what they say about Black men?" "OH! It's Twue - It's Twue!!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 11 Nov 01 - 10:45 PM "Ah knowed thet young whippersnapper when he warn't knee high to a gopher!" (spoken by old character like Gabby Hayes, Slim Pickens, etc.) - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Kim C Date: 12 Nov 01 - 10:22 AM From Jeremiah Johnson: Q: Indians bury you like that? A: 'Tweren't Mormons. But I got a good horse under me. (or something like that...) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 12 Nov 01 - 09:05 PM Kim C, That was a tall tale I used for years and I was surprised to see it in J.Johnson. I used the story to introduce listeners to Woody Guthrie's dust bowl ballads.
mine: I was ridin' along in a terrible dust blow and spotted a Stetson hat on the ground. Me not being one to let a good hat go, I got off my horse and picked it up. Imagine my surprise when it had a head in it. The head looked up and me and said, "Pilgrim, I'm on horseback. Ya best get a shovel" in Jer. Johnson: The mountain man, Del Gue (a real historical personage), is found out in the middle of nowhere burried up to his neck and spitting sand. Johnson asks him if the Indians did that to him?! Johnson was actually John Johnson--better known as "Liver Eating Johnson. As in the film, Johnson's Indian family had been massacred by Crow Indians for something Johnson had done that infuriated the tribe. J.J. killed a band of Crows in return and it became a manhood thing for individual Crows to go after him one at a time. They never were able to kill Johnson but he killed all of them and then ate a part of their liver's too. Eventually, it was all called off after the tribe decided Johnson was more of a god than a mann. Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 12 Nov 01 - 09:13 PM I do suspect that Robert Redford and the film company figured the LIVER EATING thing would be too much for audiences of that time. It was just, conveniently left out of the movie. That was considered "big medicine" to eat a part of your foe (or take his scalp) and it would protect you in future conflicts. Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 12 Nov 01 - 10:47 PM Now there is a fascinating tale! Thanks, Art. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST,Boab Date: 13 Nov 01 - 12:44 AM From McCloud the visiting New York cowboy polisman-- "There y'go!" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Kim C Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:09 AM Hi Art--- Mister being a former mountain man hisself (in the mountains of Indiana, mind you) read a little bit about the real Johnson. Most people suppose that the liver-eating thing was more a myth for intimidation than anything else - apparently it worked. The real story is pretty fascinating so I'm at a loss as to why it needed fictionalizing. (Was his name Johnson or Johnston? Memory fails me.) We have been to Johnson's relocated grave, although it's been so many years ago I don't remember where it is! I think it's now at the Old Trail Town in Wyoming, along with the relocated grave of another mountain man whose name I can't remember. He was forced to run arrows and survived. And I loved Will Geer in that movie! "Can you skin grizz?" Cheers----- :-) Kim |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Kim C Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:15 AM Colter! John Colter. He went up there in the early 1800s to trap beaver and such. I thought they moved his grave to Old Trail Town but this article doesn't mention it. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 13 Nov 01 - 01:17 PM The Indians must have wondered about those wild and hairy men...but they had little or no idea what horrors would transpire when larger numbers of white men arrived. Most of the mountain men, like the Indians, would have preferred that Nature be left as it was when they first saw it. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Lonesome EJ Date: 13 Nov 01 - 01:33 PM Art...I think its Chutzpah. Lonesome Goyim |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: ChanteyMatt Date: 13 Nov 01 - 04:40 PM How about a little wisdom? "Never squat when yer wearin' spurs." "Always drink upstream from the herd." "If yer out in front of the herd, look over yer shoulder now and then to see if there's anyone there" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: GUEST Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:47 PM This town aint big enough fer the two of us... so i'm leaving... Groucho Marx |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 13 Nov 01 - 11:09 PM "Thar's a GUEST in town..." (Dum-Da-Dum-Dum!) Ah've seed yer kind b'for, GUEST...yew lowdown, squint-eyed, 'nonymous, skulkin' sidewinder. Yew been spreadin' loose talk 'bout me and my hoss. Yew been callin' people names, and you ain't even got one...leastways you ain't owned up to it. Best you either dee-clare yerse'f in thuh open raght now, and tell us who yew are, or esle git yer shootin' irons ready or else SKEEDADDLE outta this here Mudcat Cafe! The Marshall here don't tolerate 'nonymous drifters. :-) - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Art Thieme Date: 13 Nov 01 - 11:57 PM Kim, John Colter went west with Lewis and Clark in 1804. He asked for and got permission to return on his own hook to trap. Returning, he went through what is now Yellowstone country and saw the wonders therewithin. (The first white man to see it.) When he descrobed the hot steam pouring out of the ground, the fire and sulphur, the geysers and all those natural wonders, they thought he was telling whoppers. The story goes that area of Wyoming was known as Colter's Hell for a long while after that. But the truth is (from all I've read) John Colter never did call that area Colter's Hell. That name was given, actually, to a whole other area---a bit later--in Jim Bridger's era--around 1822-1830 or so. In the trapper's time the Yellowstone area had no fixed name---just things like "burnt ground" and "fountain springs" etc. If I can, I'd like to suggest a pretty good bio of John "Liver Eating" Johnson. It's called CROW KILLER and is by Raymond W. Thorp and Robert Bunker. Now-a-days it is a Midland Book from the University Of Indiana Press (Bloomington, Indiana). The frontpiece is a photo of Johnson at Red Lodge, Montana a year before he died. "Liver Eating" told a few people his name was actually Johnston.
According to Veterans Administration records, "Johnston, John also known as Johnson, John" entered the Veterans Hospital in Los Angeles in December of 1900. He died a month later ---on January 21st.To locate his grave, drive from L.A. westward on Wilshire Blvd., through Beverly Hills past Westwood and the country club, and right on Sepulveda---go a half mile and there will be the cemetary gate.
Jno.(sic) Johnston Art Thieme |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Michael in Swansea Date: 14 Nov 01 - 04:08 AM "The coffee would taste better if they dug the latrines down stream"
"Ain't no trees on the prairie son, just cactus" Mike |
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Subject: RE: BS: Most classic cowboy sayings of all time! From: Little Hawk Date: 14 Nov 01 - 01:09 PM "GIT!" (not to be confused with the modern British term "git" as in "stupid git") - LH |