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BS: corniest intro for a song

Sir Roger de Beverley 13 Nov 01 - 10:11 AM
MC Fat 13 Nov 01 - 10:14 AM
Jack the Sailor 13 Nov 01 - 10:15 AM
Jim Dixon 13 Nov 01 - 10:16 AM
Midchuck 13 Nov 01 - 10:24 AM
Cllr 13 Nov 01 - 11:29 AM
53 13 Nov 01 - 11:43 AM
SharonA 13 Nov 01 - 12:06 PM
GUEST,Chip A. 13 Nov 01 - 12:07 PM
Chip2447 13 Nov 01 - 01:08 PM
Jim Krause 13 Nov 01 - 02:41 PM
John MacKenzie 13 Nov 01 - 02:56 PM
Callie 13 Nov 01 - 03:25 PM
ChanteyMatt 13 Nov 01 - 04:32 PM
GUEST,Chicken Charlie 13 Nov 01 - 06:44 PM
Robin2 13 Nov 01 - 06:49 PM
GUEST,emily b 13 Nov 01 - 07:00 PM
Jim Dixon 13 Nov 01 - 07:03 PM
53 13 Nov 01 - 09:54 PM
GUEST,Boab 13 Nov 01 - 10:07 PM
mandomad 14 Nov 01 - 11:08 AM
annamill 14 Nov 01 - 01:44 PM
John MacKenzie 14 Nov 01 - 01:53 PM
Charlie Baum 14 Nov 01 - 02:15 PM
Don Firth 14 Nov 01 - 05:39 PM
Celtic Soul 14 Nov 01 - 10:50 PM
GUEST,Bjart 14 Nov 01 - 11:35 PM
Bob P 15 Nov 01 - 04:04 PM
GUEST,MC Fat 16 Nov 01 - 04:56 AM
Sir Roger de Beverley 16 Nov 01 - 06:22 AM
GUEST,MC Fat 16 Nov 01 - 06:47 AM
Gervase 16 Nov 01 - 07:10 AM
GUEST,MC Fat 16 Nov 01 - 07:23 AM
Jim Dixon 16 Nov 01 - 01:03 PM
Don Firth 16 Nov 01 - 01:13 PM
Deckman 16 Nov 01 - 07:51 PM

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Subject: corniest intro for a song
From: Sir Roger de Beverley
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:11 AM


Click for the 'PermaThread™: List of all joke threads'


I think that I got this one from Mandomad when we used to play as a duo.

I'd like to play some wurlitzer music:

"Wurlitzer one for the money, two for the show....."

Anyone know of any cornier intros than that?


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: MC Fat
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:14 AM

Play us a Jazz Chord - 'I just chord to say I love you'


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Jack the Sailor
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:15 AM

"Amazing Grace... used to be her fav'rite song.".....


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:16 AM

"We just learned this song off our new album." That one's so old it's getting painful to hear.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Midchuck
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:24 AM

There's always "Here's a medley of our hit." I think everyone uses that.

Peter.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Cllr
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 11:29 AM

I was running a sing around at Sidmouth festival and it was a themed evening "Songs of the sea and Shanteys" During the evening one of the singers said that he didn't know any songs relating to our theme. I asked him what he did want to sing about and he replied a song about An Australian sheep sheerer, I told him to sing it (as I would rather people did not get missed out when they wanted to join in). When it was his turn to sing I annouced to the assembled company that the next song qualified as a song of the sea because it was about a clipper. Cllr


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: 53
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 11:43 AM

we haven't played this one in a while so yall bear with us, sick and tired of hearing this stupid line, if you haven't done it for a while don't tell everybody and they won't even know, they'll just think that you suck anyway. BOB


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: SharonA
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 12:06 PM

"Here's a song in the key of L... at least it sounds like 'ell...."


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,Chip A.
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 12:07 PM

"Here's one from our new c.d. which, by the way, has just gone aluminum." I heard this from the Can't Hardly Playboys. One of the best names I ever heard for a group.

Chip A.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Chip2447
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 01:08 PM

Our next song is a ....
SECRET!!!

The other Chip
Chip2447


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Jim Krause
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 02:41 PM

Heard at a Euphoria Stringband concert a variation of the above:

"This one's from our CD which has just gone plastic."
Jim
PS, Of course I didn't say that.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 02:56 PM

"This song was composed so long ago, it's virtually decomposed". Da DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaa "I was going to do a Leonard Cohen ( or any sonwriters ) song, but then I thought why should I,he never does any of mine!" Boom boom "To introduce this number we will have a roll on the drums: and a sandwich on the piano". Laugh laugh, weedy laugh laugh.... From a well known Irish singer ( sic ) "This is the song that made me Seamus." Ohmigawd....... "Is there a hole I can be sick in" Bob Dylan. Jock


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Callie
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 03:25 PM

Ha ha ha!

What about

"this song is about ... three minutes long"

Callie


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: ChanteyMatt
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 04:32 PM

This is a song from our newest album. The band all chipped in to buy it.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,Chicken Charlie
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 06:44 PM

Snivel & sneeze, snort & cough--
Better do it now cause (pfft!) we're off.

Or for spirituals (originally from "Cigareets and Whusky": "A preachment, dear friends, you are about to receive/ On John Barleycorn, nicotine and the temptation of Eve."

To set the rhythm for any 'march' tempo song, e.g. "8th Day of January"--"Hay foot, straw foot, belly full of beans..."

My fave of what we actually use is for the song "Get Up Napoleon." "This is a song 'bout a man named his horse NAPOLEON. Now, if you wonder why a man would name his horse NAPOLEON, well, the reason this fella named his horse NAPOLEON ...... was because of all the BONY PARTS."

[Yee haw.]

CC


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Robin2
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 06:49 PM

"This next song is one of your favorites, I hope it's one of ours"
"This song is not the one you requested, but it's got a lot of the same notes."


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,emily b
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 07:00 PM

Fun stuff here. Inspiring? Well, maybe not, but you are making me laugh. Keep them coming.

Emily


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 07:03 PM

"We've had a lot of requests about this song, but we're going to sing it anyway..."


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: 53
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 09:54 PM

jim, that's a good one. BOB


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,Boab
Date: 13 Nov 01 - 10:07 PM

"The Road and the Miles to Dundee"---a song about the likely story told to a Dundee cop when he caught this guy with a female purse and jewellery.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: mandomad
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 11:08 AM

I think I nicked the "Wurlitzer" from Maxi & Mitch, they had a store of cornfed intro's.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: annamill
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 01:44 PM

One of the funniest intros to a song I've ever heard and never forgotton was by the infamous and now very old Cousin Brucie of NY Radio fame.

When introducing the song, "Let's hang on to what we've got" of early R'n'r, he said "..or as one stocking said to another". It got funnier and funnier as the song went on and on..

Not folk, but what the hey..

Love, annamill


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 01:53 PM

I've had several requests during the interval, but as none of them are physically possible,I'm going to sing instead.. Jock


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Charlie Baum
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 02:15 PM

"Some songs need no introduction. Therefore this song will not get one." [End of intro.]


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Don Firth
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 05:39 PM

Shall we clap into't roundly, without hawking or spitting or saying we are hoarse, which are the only prologues to a bad voice?

--W. Shakespeare, As You Like It, Act V, scene iii

(Humbly submitted by Don Firth -- coff! coff! wheeze! hack! hack!)


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Celtic Soul
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 10:50 PM

Band member #1: "I'd like to do a nice and pretty song for you"

Band member #2: "But first, *he'll* sing".


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,Bjart
Date: 14 Nov 01 - 11:35 PM

As my band is fond of introducing our little rockabilly number: "This one's called 'My Girlfriend Wears Combat Boots'. It's based on a true story, but it happened to him, not me, and she didn't really wear combat boots."


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Bob P
Date: 15 Nov 01 - 04:04 PM

Someone said they wanted to hear "_ _ _ _" real bad; well now, here's your wish come true. . . .

Or,

I never felt comfortable with the intro to McCartney's "Here, There & Everywhere" (To lead a better life, I need my love . . . )

I just finger pick the chords for that without lyrics and think it works just as well.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,MC Fat
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 04:56 AM

I've suffered for my music now it's yout turn. My mate BONZO aka Paul Elliot sometimes does intros like 'The next song is the Wild Rover it's about rovers who go wild' or 'The next song is called Whiskey in the Jar it's about jars with whiskey in them' get the idea ?


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Sir Roger de Beverley
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 06:22 AM

Thanks Jim -that makes things so much simpler now. So Mr Tambourine Man is about a man who plays/looks like/is a tambourine?

R


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,MC Fat
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 06:47 AM

By jove you've got it Roger !! so McAlpine Fusliers is about some fusliers called McAlpine.


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Gervase
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 07:10 AM

I've used the "I've suffered for my music..."one meself!
Another one we used to lob at audiences in a band I was in: "Amazing how potent cheap music can be, eh?"
And, introducing a fellow vocalist: "This is John - he's got Van Gogh's ear for music and Douglas Bader's dancing skills."


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: GUEST,MC Fat
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 07:23 AM

Not a corny intro but that fine comedian Keith Donnelly tells a story about a council housing estate in Birmingham where the City Council named the roads after war heros you know like Churchill Drive well it seems they have got a Douglas Bader Walk !!


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 01:03 PM

"This next song is on our new CD. It's already a million-seller. -- Yeah, we've got a million copies down in the cellar."

"And, speaking of CD's, we just signed a big contract with Columbia Records. -- We only have to pay $9.95, plus shipping and handling, for the first 6 CD's..."


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Don Firth
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 01:13 PM

"He was a folk singer. How do I know he was a folk singer? He spent ten minutes introducing a three minute song."

Don Firth


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Subject: RE: BS: corniest intro for a song
From: Deckman
Date: 16 Nov 01 - 07:51 PM

Here's a song I've enjoyed for years ... unfortunatly, it's been so many years that I can no longer enjoy it! CHEERS Bob


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Mudcat time: 21 September 4:13 PM EDT

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