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BS: Men in their 'proper places'

Little Hawk 04 Apr 02 - 01:05 PM
Amos 03 Apr 02 - 12:56 PM
Midchuck 03 Apr 02 - 12:54 PM
Amos 03 Apr 02 - 12:25 PM
Robin2 03 Apr 02 - 12:16 AM
GUEST 02 Apr 02 - 08:31 PM
Little Hawk 26 Mar 02 - 11:07 PM
GUEST 25 Mar 02 - 11:54 PM
rea 25 Mar 02 - 12:33 AM
Celtic Soul 24 Mar 02 - 09:51 PM
Irish sergeant 24 Mar 02 - 07:21 PM
DMcG 24 Mar 02 - 03:59 AM
Peter Kasin 24 Mar 02 - 02:37 AM
Little Hawk 23 Mar 02 - 12:06 PM
hesperis 23 Mar 02 - 10:36 AM
DMcG 23 Mar 02 - 10:23 AM
CarolC 23 Mar 02 - 10:12 AM
GUEST 23 Mar 02 - 08:03 AM
Irish sergeant 22 Mar 02 - 04:30 PM
NightWing 22 Mar 02 - 12:04 AM
Bearheart 21 Mar 02 - 11:06 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 21 Mar 02 - 10:18 PM
Amos 21 Mar 02 - 08:47 PM
Irish sergeant 21 Mar 02 - 08:28 PM
gnu 21 Mar 02 - 07:03 PM
GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River 21 Mar 02 - 06:41 PM
Don Firth 21 Mar 02 - 05:27 PM
gnu 21 Mar 02 - 04:39 PM
Irish sergeant 21 Mar 02 - 04:13 PM
hesperis 21 Mar 02 - 01:14 PM
KingBrilliant 21 Mar 02 - 09:01 AM
kendall 21 Mar 02 - 08:27 AM
CarolC 21 Mar 02 - 03:23 AM
Mark Clark 21 Mar 02 - 12:45 AM
kendall 14 Mar 02 - 07:40 AM
CarolC 14 Mar 02 - 01:09 AM
Dicho (Frank Staplin) 14 Mar 02 - 01:02 AM
CarolC 14 Mar 02 - 12:56 AM
Dicho (Frank Staplin) 14 Mar 02 - 12:07 AM
Mark Clark 13 Mar 02 - 11:12 PM
Amos 13 Mar 02 - 09:29 PM
Essex Girl 13 Mar 02 - 10:29 AM
GUEST,Diesel 12 Mar 02 - 02:01 PM
Bobert 11 Mar 02 - 10:45 PM
Deda 11 Mar 02 - 10:39 PM
michaelr 11 Mar 02 - 10:31 PM
Amos 11 Mar 02 - 10:21 PM
kendall 11 Mar 02 - 09:59 PM
Bobert 11 Mar 02 - 09:58 PM
Amos 11 Mar 02 - 09:52 PM

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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Apr 02 - 01:05 PM

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Hee! Hee! Hee! (*gasp*) Har! Har! Oh, my god, that is so classic...

Only Blind DRunk in Blind River could add anything much to improve on that list.

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 12:56 PM

I especially like #1, Peter! :>)

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Midchuck
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 12:54 PM

Here's an offset to "The Rules" as posted way back there. Stereotypes both sexes unfairly, but I found it funny. Doubtless many here will not. What the hell:

WHAT WOMEN NEED TO KNOW:

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as sports, sex, and cars.

1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Check your oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done - not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Amos
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 12:25 PM

As the old saying goes: Men are from Earth; women are from Earth; get used to it!!

Love those Mudcat ladies one and all, and how could we not?

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Robin2
Date: 03 Apr 02 - 12:16 AM

C'mon ladies, where would we be without the guys?

They know they are special, and we know it too.

Robin
(married 29 years this month to a guy who knows his place...side by side with me!)


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Apr 02 - 08:31 PM

it is a given that within coitus the most universal style is with the man positioned above therefore the guest is probably correct the woman below the man above


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Mar 02 - 11:07 PM

So...you're saying that Jesus had no love?

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: GUEST
Date: 25 Mar 02 - 11:54 PM

a man has no love, that is the provedence of a woman.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: rea
Date: 25 Mar 02 - 12:33 AM

a man's proper place is with those he loves - be they his children, lover (male or female, we seem to be neglecting that), or just the animals who make his home less lonely. not that this is always possible, but it seems to be where many of them (and us women) would like to be.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Celtic Soul
Date: 24 Mar 02 - 09:51 PM

LOL! I love this place, even the trolling is amusing...

Well, for me, anyones place is wherever they make it (regardless of gender), so long as it does not involve destroying others lives in the process of getting there. Happiness is found internally, not externally. When you have that, then you can find the right person to fill that place at your side. Before that, and you are looking for a bandaid for the hurt...not a partner to share life with.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 24 Mar 02 - 07:21 PM

Hi hesperis! How's the book going? I'm waiting to hear more of the adventures of all involved especially Aidan the Wanderer Neil


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: DMcG
Date: 24 Mar 02 - 03:59 AM

Another snippet from 'When Adam was first created' from the Copper Family:

She was not taken out of his head, Sir
To reign and to triumph o'er man
Nor yet from his feet was she taken
By Man to be trampled upon
But she was taken from out of his side, Sir
His equal and partner to be
But when they're united in one, Sir
The man is the top of the tree

(I reckon it breaks down in the last couplet, but I have always interpreted that final 'man' as the combined man-and-woman implied by the line before and 'the top of the tree' as meaning 'cannot be bettered'. Of course, it probably is supposed to mean that after marriage, the man rules. Ho-hum)


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Peter Kasin
Date: 24 Mar 02 - 02:37 AM

What Carol, Kendall, and Bat Goddess said early on in the thread. Carol's second post isn't too shabby, either! :-)


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Mar 02 - 12:06 PM

Careful! You'll hurt his feelings...

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: hesperis
Date: 23 Mar 02 - 10:36 AM

lol, as if any girl in her right mind would go out with a guy like BDiBR!


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: DMcG
Date: 23 Mar 02 - 10:23 AM

From the Copper Family (well, its time for some music in this thread)

Man without woman's a beggar
Suppose the the whole world he possessed
And the beggar that's got a good woman
With more than the world he is blest
So let not the fair be despised
By man as she's part of himself
For woman by Adam was prized
Far more than the world full of wealth

When Adam was first created
And Lord of the Universe crowned
His happiness was not completed
Until that a helpmate was found


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: CarolC
Date: 23 Mar 02 - 10:12 AM

Fine day for a troll today isn't it? I mean stroll.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: GUEST
Date: 23 Mar 02 - 08:03 AM

Missionary style - above the woman.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 22 Mar 02 - 04:30 PM

Blind; The comment was aimed to the idea that you might have a lady at home who would take umbrage at your statement and meant as a joke. No, I am not a cop. I re-enact the Civil War as a First sergeant in a Union regiment. Hence Irish Sergeant. I try to avoid the cops. There are times they just don't have a sense of humor. Kindest regards, neil


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: NightWing
Date: 22 Mar 02 - 12:04 AM

One of my best friends mottos:

I am a man.
I am always wrong.
My opinions have no value.

Our female friends always applaud riotously. (And all the males laugh too)

BB,
NightWing


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Bearheart
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 11:06 PM

In the hot tub. Reading their favorite book. To their favorite woman. So she can be in the hot tub too.

Or, same scene, in bed. With music playing of course.

Actually, if he's happy does it matter where he is?

Or where she is?

And I think that Latin teacher should find another town to live in where she can make a living doing what she loves. Deda you break my heart. It wouldn't matter if you didn't love it. But if you do, there must be a way.

Bekki


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 10:18 PM

Got that right Amos...their are a lotta girls, mostly skanks, who are mad aqt me in this town. Tough! I am what I am and I ain't changin'. These girls are like always mad anyway at someone cos it makes em feel inportant to be mad. That's mostly why, I think. I could care less. You clould pave a new highway to Subdury with just the pancake make-up off all the girls around here who have been mad at me. I have not made most of them so I don't know what hyou mean about my "Maker". (Not that I ain't tried, but they are stuck-up...and don't know a good thing when they see it!)

I also don't get the dcomment about the flowers at all. That was Neil the Irish Sergeant. You ain't a cop are you, Neil? I been havin sertin disagreements with cops around here as long as I can remember....(which ain't too long! Arf! Arf! A lotta beer and grass can slow the mind, so even tho I was not born stupid (like my idiot brother and all his frineds) I find my memory is kinda, like...

What were we talkin' about? Okay, well...

Have you guys ever been to Sudbury? We call it "Sudsy", and it is a real man's town. About all you can do there is drink and ride snowmoblies on the lake whch this year has been more dnagerous than usual becoz the ice has not been too good. That's when you ghotta lay on the speed so ya get across ahead of the ice before it breaks, eh? If your too slow then you take a dip and get sobered up real fast...if you live. My brothere has dunked 3 times and lived, proabaly cox he was so drunk that the cold didn't faze him. I have to admit he can drink, eh? But who can't in this family? Fortuanately he did it on borrode equimpement which we did not pay for, so no big loss, eh?

I am still the brains of this outfit, no dout of that. This is proved by the fact that my brother (Don the jerk) does not surf trhe flippin net, man! He is such a loser.

But he can drink. I always say ya gotta play your strong suit, eh? I got 2 bowers, three of a kind, and a flippin ace up my sleeve, man, and I ain't even started yet.

BDiBR


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Amos
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 08:47 PM

Get it said, Brother Blind -- and prepare to meet your Maker, while you're at it (I hear she's really pissed at you!!) LOL!!

Regards,

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 08:28 PM

Blind, I don't think they got that many flowers in season...Neil :~)


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: gnu
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 07:03 PM

Come on over Blind. I've got a pot of tea on the go and we can start working on your apology right away. Trust me, I've done this before...


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 06:41 PM

It is time that a reql man got in on this dischusion and stratinend y09ou losers out!

A man's place is any place he flippin well wants to be, like...

With a beer in one hand and a babe in the other.

NMake that two beer.

Behind the wheel of an awsome four by four, with a babe in one hand and a beer in the ohter. (Two beer ain't smart when your drivin.)

Where the actshun is. Where the winners hang out.

Not in jail. JaIL SERIOUSLY SUCKS EH?

Sorry. Capslok got stuck.

With a remote in one hand, a babe and three beer in the other, and a hockyey game on the tube.

Got the idea? Geez, you people are seriously out ot it if you don['t.

The world was made for men. Ask people like Hollyw0od Hulk Hogan. He is a man. He don't appoligize to nonbody, eh? NO man ever apologizes even if he is wrongn cos the world belongs to men, eh? I am sure glad that I am a man. Men RULE!!! Men will always rule. God made it that way and it's the law! You don't beleeve me, then read the flippin book, and see for yourself. Women are needed too, mostly to bring children into the world so we can have more men and to make men happy, eh? And to clean up. Men are mostly not good at that cos they have other stuff thats more important to do.

You don't have to be no brain to figure that out. It's basic nowledge,eh? Only skanks and total losers could not know this.

- BDiBR


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Don Firth
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 05:27 PM

A man's proper place is with the remote. Although most women usually know where the "mute" button is so they can zap commercials, in general, they don't really know how to run one of those things. What's the purpose of a remote if you don't use it to channel-surf? Jeez! If a woman has control of the remote, she might watch a whole show all the way through. That's a waste of technology!

Seriously:— What CarolC said above, about 11-Mar-02 - 08:32 PM

Don Firth


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: gnu
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 04:39 PM

Just remember four words... oh, yeah, right, sorry. John Wing, philosopher-comedian.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 04:13 PM

Hell, If I'm always wrong as a man anyway, I might as well enjoy it big time! :~) Have a great evening, Neil


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: hesperis
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 01:14 PM

Great one, Kendall!!!!!! That's going to be one of my favorite jokes now.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: KingBrilliant
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 09:01 AM

He's ALWAYS wrong - no question.

Kris


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: kendall
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 08:27 AM

he is if the tree falls on him, stupid sod.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: CarolC
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 03:23 AM

Well that's certainly a relief, Mark.

Re: your question, "If a man is all alone in the forest and there's no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?"

I don't know. What do you think?


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Mark Clark
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 12:45 AM

Carol, I'll take your advice under consideration. <g> I should have added that “The Rules” aren't actually in force in my house. My wife, Jan, and daughter Kate thought they were funny and so did I.

Those rules are in the same vein as the philosophical question: If a man is all alone in the forest and there's no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Nobody gets uptight at my house... well, that is except for the cat now that we have a dog.

      - Mark


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: kendall
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 07:40 AM

There is only one necessary rule, and it is golden.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 01:09 AM

Oohhh... That's too bad. Have you tried the Walter Mitty approach?


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Dicho (Frank Staplin)
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 01:02 AM

Run Away? No Hiding Place Down Here!


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: CarolC
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 12:56 AM

Hell, Mark, I couldn't even be happy living in a household with rules like those, and they are supposedly for my benefit.

I'm having a difficult time trying to describe the effect that reading those rules is having on me. Sort of a cringe that extends from the top of my brain, all the way down through all of my innards, and making my teeth itch on the way, and ending up as a big knot of queasy frustration in the middle of my gut.

Run away, Mark! Get away from that place as fast as you can! It's evil!


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Dicho (Frank Staplin)
Date: 14 Mar 02 - 12:07 AM

I'll be seeing you
In all the proper places-
Or else!


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Mark Clark
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 11:12 PM

I have no trouble at all understanding my my proper place. The women in my family were kind enough to post the explanation on the wall.

      - Mark


The Rules

  1. The female always makes the rules
  2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notice.
  3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
  4. If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change them.
  5. The female is never wrong.
  6. If the female is wrong it is due to a misunderstanding which was the direct result of something the male said or did. The male must apologise immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
  7. The male is always wrong.
  8. The male may be right if he agrees with the female, unless she wants him to disagree.
  9. The female may change her mind at any time.
  10. The male may never change his mind without the express written consent of the female.
  11. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
  12. The male must remain calm at all times unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
  13. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
  14. The male's always expected to mind read.
  15. If the female has PMT all the rules are null and void.
  16. The female is ready when she is ready.
  17. The male must be ready at ALL times.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Amos
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 09:29 PM

Essex:

I think the only solution is an algorithm that proves for alternating prepositions and a mad rate....

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Essex Girl
Date: 13 Mar 02 - 10:29 AM

While I'm willing to agree with:-

"Well, most men like to believe their proper place is inside women, but they don't talk about it much. I don't think this idea is as widely shared on the distaff side!!"

And

"Your place is neither in front of us nor behind us, but at our side."

This could cause some practical difficulties, unless some men are built differently !


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: GUEST,Diesel
Date: 12 Mar 02 - 02:01 PM

Personally - I think Harpgirl (and Amos) got it right - if side by side is good - On top or below is infinitely better.....

As for other good places - Sitting room is good, kitchen is fun .... the list goes on !

Diesel


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 10:45 PM

Amos: I know. This thread is just so entertaining, that I jusy can't help from playing with it. I remember back a million years ago when I was in college and there was this guy by the name of Norman who used his old Volkwagen bug as his soap box. About every month or so he would repaint the entire car and then start over with lettering it from top to bottom with his latest tirade. Well, one day he showed up with a new editorial freshly painted about his relationship with an ex. Well, he started on the roof and went thru the entire thing about gender roles and ended up with the words, "WHAT DO WOMEN WANT?" Well, Amos, he left the car and went off to class and when he returned, the ex had painted over "DO WOMEN" and painted in " DOES NORMAN"... Now, I'm not sure what this has to add or detract from this thread, but it fits in some how.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Deda
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 10:39 PM

What really makes me happy is teaching kids Latin. Unfortunately there's no money in it, so I do it on weekends as a hobby and drag myself, mon-Fri, 8-5, to an office job at which I am none too good, and none too loved. As a Latin teacher I was much more talented, and much more appreciated, and my whole body and my heart and life felt much lighter. I spent many evening hours getting ready for the next day, and felt creative. Now I've fallen into the great American stereotype of dragging myself to a job where I watch the clock and long for weekends.

Terrible thread creep -- sorry. Fortunately I have a wonderful man who gets home from his day job just a little after I do -- so I make supper and he cleans up, and the day ends passably well, with us in our place together.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: michaelr
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 10:31 PM

You can't MAKE someone happy, any more than you can make someone love you. IMHO the thing to strive for is to know the person you care about, and make their happiness possible by not getting in the way with selfishness (a lesson some men I know have yet to learn).

Other than that, I second Kendall's statement.

Cheers,
Michael


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 10:21 PM

Bobert,

A great line, really, however illusory...

A


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: kendall
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 09:59 PM

Happiness comes not from having what you want, but from wanting what you have.


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Bobert
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 09:58 PM

Way to put Amos in his place, CarolC. Jus' funnin. Really. Hey, like Rodney King said, "Can't we all just get along?"


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Subject: RE: BS: Men in their 'proper places'
From: Amos
Date: 11 Mar 02 - 09:52 PM

Nicely turned, Carol. Pardon me for snapping! :>)

A


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