Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..

Subject: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From:
Date: 08 Apr 98 - 06:08 PM

I've heard a few verses

aye aye ya aye
in china they do it for chile
so sing me another verse worse than
the other verse
and waltz me around by my willie

please add if you know verses

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Earl
Date: 08 Apr 98 - 06:27 PM

The verses are limericks so the song is virtually endless. Here's one to get started:

There was a young lady named Wild
Who kept herself quite undefiled
By thinking of Jesus
Contagious diseases
And the bother of having a child

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Catfeet
Date: 08 Apr 98 - 10:20 PM

I always thought the best part of this particular limerick song was the ability to change the chorus. Ie. instead of "in china they do it for chilies", your mother swims after troop ships, Darth vader's better looking than you mother, etc.(most of the chorus changes I know involve someone's mother)

Catfeet

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Apr 98 - 10:30 PM

yep...all Limericks..I remember singing this for 20-30 minutes at a time in about 1962-3...and we usually did the "in China they never eat chili" routine to give someone else time to think of another verse...verses limited only by the tolerance of the audience...

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Bojangles
Date: 08 Apr 98 - 11:43 PM

There was a young maiden named Alice
Who peed in a Catholic Church chalice.
'Twas the general belief
That 'twas just for relief
And not through sectarian malice.

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Charlie Baum
Date: 09 Apr 98 - 12:01 AM

I remember being in a group of people in a tavern. The entertainers in the tavern were about to begin a song of the nature of "Sing me another verse..." To gauge what they could reasonably get away with, they asked if the assembled multitudes if they would like to hear something "mild, double-entendered, risque, filthy, or downright filthy." One of the memories I cannot shake is that of MY OWN MOTHER standing up and calling at the top of her lungs for "downright filthy!" I'd never thought of my Mom as that earthy before.

--Charlie

The youths who haunt movie palaces
Have no need for psychoanalysis
But dear Doctor Freud
Is distinctly annoyed
By their long-standing grasp of their fallacies.

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Bill in Alabama
Date: 09 Apr 98 - 06:13 AM

What great memories this song brings back! We sang this one in Infantry School at Fort Benning as the cattle trucks were hauling us from one training area to another. The verses were, without exception, of the "downright filthy" variety. That was a long time ago, and I can't at present recall any that I wish to share. But thanks for the memory.

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Tiger
Date: 09 Apr 98 - 09:20 AM

Charlie......

Make that last line "phallouses"

Don't you agree, PeeWee?

..Tiger

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Charlie Baum
Date: 10 Apr 98 - 04:41 AM

It was "fallacies" in my source, as in falsehoods.

Sometimes limericks don't rhyme the way you expect them to:

There once was a man from St. Bees
Who was stung in the arm by a wasp
When asked if it hurt
He replied, no it doesn't
But thank G-d that it wasn't a hornet!

Charlie

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: judy
Date: 11 Apr 98 - 02:35 AM

At the Summer Solstice Folk Festival in Los Angeles we always had a Dirty Joke and Song workshop. It had immense attendance. The hit of the day was always a song about Masturbation sung to Funiculi, Funicula

enjoy! judy

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Apr 98 - 01:36 PM

NOT "Charlotte the Harlot"??? or "The Winnepeg Whore"? tsk...where has 'discriminating' bad taste gone??

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Bert
Date: 13 Apr 98 - 12:55 PM

It hasn't gone, it's here @BAWDY

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: GUEST,james
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 02:15 PM

There once was a man from Nantucket
With a dick so long he could suck it
He replied with a grin
As he wiped off his chin
If my ear were a clit then I'd fuck it!!!

haha good stuff man

Subject: RE: lyrics:So sing me another verse thats worse..
From: Greg B
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 02:53 PM

Gee, James, where did you get that one? Do you have a primary
source? I'm sure nobody here has ever heard it before.

(I hear there's a ship called Venus that's looking for a cabin-boy,
perhaps you can sign on.)

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 06:25 PM

A very few, and quickly:

There once was a miss from Madras,
Who possessed a magnificent ass!
'Twasn't round and pink,
As you probably think,
But was black, had long ears and ate grass!!

There was a young man from Boston,
Who drove a little red Austin.
There was room for his ass,
And a gallon of gas;
But his balls hung out, and he lost 'em.

There was a young man from Madras,
Who had two balls made of brass.
He clanged them together,
And played "Stormy Weather,"
And lightning shot out of his ass!

There was a young pouf from Khartoum,
Took a lesbian up to his room.
And they argued all night,
As to who had the right
To do what, and with which and to whom!

There. That ought to hold 'em for a while.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Midchuck
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 06:46 PM

Sometimes limericks don't rhyme the way you expect them to:

There once was a man from St. Bees
Who was stung in the arm by a wasp...

There was a young fellow named Durkin,
Addicted to jerkin' his gherkin.
His wife told him, "Durkin,
By jerkin' your gherkin,
You're shirkin' your firkin', you bastard!"

Peter

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Leadfingers
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 07:24 PM

We used to use a different chorus !

That was a very good song
Singe me another one
Just like the other one
Sing me another one do

And assorted limericks !

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Charley Noble
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 07:52 PM

And sometimes when we got bored we'd sing:

In Chili they do it for china!
So let's have another verse that's worse than the other verse,
Then waltz me around again, Dinah!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Joe_F
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 08:46 PM

One can, indeed, go in a cycle:

In China they do it for chili.
In Chile they do it with turkeys.
In Turkey they do it with grease.
In Greece they do it for china.

I suggest, however, that further limericks be posted not here, but on already existing limerick threads.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Songster Bob
Date: 14 Aug 07 - 10:19 PM

I recall a wonderful song session in Helen Schneyer's kitchen, following a carol-singing trip through old-town Alexandria streets, that ended with a marathon "Frigging in the Rigging." The best verse of that I remember was this one:

The captain of the lugger
Was such a filthy bugger --
Declared unfit
To shovel shit
From one ship to another.

Ah, those were the days.

Bob

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Greg B
Date: 15 Aug 07 - 12:11 AM

There once was a fellow from Ghent
Whose dick was peculiarly bent
To save him from trouble
He'd shove it in double
And instead of coming, he went!

There once was a couple named Kelly
Who had to lie belly to belly
Because in their haste
They use library paste
Instead of petroleum jelly

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Snuffy
Date: 15 Aug 07 - 08:23 AM

A young couple from Aberystwyth
United the organs they cystwyth
By turns and degrees
On their hands and their knees
They got to the organs they pystwyth

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Charley Noble
Date: 15 Aug 07 - 09:12 AM

Songster Bob-

You certainly have netted a particularly fertile verse for Friggin' in the Riggin'.

We always enjoyed singing a more innocent version of the song while tied up at marinas. The fun was waiting for someone to make a mistake as we imbibed more and more fermented fluids.

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Joe_F
Date: 15 Aug 07 - 08:46 PM

Since this chorus now has a thread of its own, it perhaps should be mentioned that its tune is that of the chorus of "Cielito Lindo", a song that IMO we hear too seldom.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 15 Aug 07 - 08:55 PM

There was a young girl from St. Paul
Wore a newspaper dress to a ball
But the dress caught afire
And burnt her entire
Front page, sporting section, and all!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Greg B
Date: 15 Aug 07 - 08:57 PM

Aye, Aye, Aye, Aye...

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 16 Aug 07 - 01:07 AM

I've obviously been leading too chaste and pure a life recently... I have no recollection of this song at all.

LTS

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 16 Aug 07 - 03:00 AM

To mudcat I come in belief,
That I can find some light relief.
And Limericks I've found,
Some of which might astound.
Keep 'em coming folks, that's now your brief!

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Old Grizzly
Date: 16 Aug 07 - 04:17 AM

Now there as a young man from Wales
Who lived on gangrenous snails
When he could get none of these
He made do with green cheese
That he picked off his dick with his nails

not sure they sink any lower than that ......

but someone will prove me wrong no doubt....

Dave

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 16 Aug 07 - 06:41 AM

Oh Dave, you should know better than to say things like that here!

LTS

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Leadfingers
Date: 16 Aug 07 - 06:55 AM

I like to start 'mild' and slowly degenerate !

The Limerick packs laughs anatomical
In a space that is quite economical
But the good ones we've seen
So seldom are clean
And the clean ones are seldom so comical

God's plan made a hopeful beginning
But man went and spoilt it by sinning
We trust that the story
Will end in God's glory
But at present the other side's winning

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,pavane
Date: 16 Aug 07 - 08:26 AM

A lot of the above were printed in the "Pan book of Limericks" around 1970, though some in slightly different vesions.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,guest
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 11:20 AM

The two grossest I recall were:

There once was a girl from Azores
Who's snatch was all covered with sores.
The dogs in the street
Would eat the green meat
That hung in festoons from her drawers.

There was a man named MacTavish
Who was known as a sexual savage
While fucking his mother
He beat off his brother
And ate out his sister's miscarriage.

Many more were renowned for cleverness ~

There was a lad named Crockett
tried to screw a light socket
Some son-of-a-bitch
turned on the switch
and Crockett took off like a rocket.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Joe_F
Date: 23 Aug 07 - 09:16 PM

But in her interstices
She had a far worse disease

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: GUEST,Weigel
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 04:41 PM

there was this man from Oregon
who wanted to have sex again
so he went on a quest
to sleep with the rest
so he moved to Bellvieue Washington

Oregon is pronounced Or-e-gin
Washington is pronounced Wash-ing-tin

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 06:41 PM

i read mine again, and it sucks...

Weigel

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 07:18 PM

Weigel's post 'may' not have been visible to everyone, as it was in "Bradley Hand ITC", a handwriting font.

I saw it in the original, and I'm not sure how it defaults if you don't have that font, so here's the post.

there was this man from Oregon
who wanted to have sex again
so he went on a quest
to sleep with the rest
so he moved to Bellvieue Washington

Oregon is pronounced Or-e-gin
Washington is pronounced Wash-ing-tin

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Joe_F
Date: 11 Oct 07 - 09:08 PM

Weigel: Occasionally there is a point to bad rhyme, e.g.,

The youth who attend picture palaces
Have no use for psychoanalysis.
Altho Dr Freud
Is distinctly annoyed,
They cling to their long-standing fallacies.

There was once a young man of West Cork,
Who always split buns with a fork.
Said he, "Damn that rhyme!
I'd make much better time
If I came from Kilmallock or Limerick.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Jimmy
Date: 04 Nov 07 - 01:27 AM

A poetical lad from Japan
Wrote limericks that just wouldn't scan.
When told it was so,
He replaied, "Yes, I know,
But I always try to squeeze as many syllables into the last line as I possibly can."

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Mr Happy
Date: 04 Nov 07 - 01:35 AM

There once was a man from St. Bees
Who was stung by a wasp on his knees...?


Now isn't that better?

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: topical tom
Date: 04 Nov 07 - 05:36 PM

There once was a man from Madras
Whose balls were made out of brass.
With each step he took
They thundered and shook
And lightning shot out of his ass.


As some entertainer once said (Al Jolson?) "I got a hundred of 'em!
They hark back to my younger, tavern-going days.It was a singing contest we often played.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: topical tom
Date: 04 Nov 07 - 07:31 PM

Not Al Jolson! Jimmy Durantee.

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Little Hawk
Date: 04 Nov 07 - 07:56 PM

Bob Stanfield could sell underwear
And Trudeau could certainly swear
But Brian Mulroney
Just gave us the Loonie
Aside from a lot of hot air

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,check this out...
Date: 04 Nov 07 - 08:26 PM

there was a man from tamil nadu,
he didnt know what to do?
so he had his fun by fu*king a nun
and then he became a sadhu

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: PeadarOfPortsmouth
Date: 05 Nov 07 - 01:49 PM

Per the original request of the thread, I learned this as a particularly crude (and not particularly witty) rugby song. Assuming there's no one faint-of-heart on this thread, two of the lead lines I remember were :

aye aye ya aye/Your mother licks bat sh!t off cave walls
aye aye ya aye/Your sister goes out with sailors (or replace "sailors" with the two syllable nickname of a friend your looking to embarrass)

I'm quite certain "Your father" and "Your brother" did things as well, (I think cucumbers were somehow involved) but it's been a few years since I've heard this ditty...and since I wasn't actually on the rugby team, I didn't commit it to memory.

Peter

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Nov 07 - 03:19 PM

Aye, aye ay-ay
In texas they claim they grow bigger
so tell me another that's worse than the other
and dust it all over with sugar

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,RIch (bodhránaí gan ciall)
Date: 05 Nov 07 - 05:35 PM

Your father refills cream donuts
so sing me another verse...


Your sister rides bicycles without seat
so sing me another verse....

I don't remember any of the other verses.


On the other hand the difference between prose and poetry is:

Prose: The once was a lad from Rees who waded the river up to his ankles.

If he'd waded a little deeper it would be poetry.

Rich

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 05 Nov 07 - 07:21 PM

There was a young miss from Madras,
Who possessed a magnificent ass!
T'wasn't round and pink,
As you undoubtedly think,
But was black, had long ears and ate grass.

There was a bold lad from Westmeath,
Was a toper who had oft' cheated death.
Before he gave out,
He ordered MORE STOUT!
With his antepenultimate breath!

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Mark Ross
Date: 06 Nov 07 - 09:54 AM

"you're mother does pushups on flagpoles"

Mark Ross

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse.
From: Midchuck
Date: 06 Nov 07 - 10:49 AM

Your mother skin dives for whaleshit...

P

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 06 Nov 07 - 11:24 AM

I must have hit paydirt in Westmeath...?

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Bilirubin is brown.....

Subject: RE: lyrics: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 07 Nov 07 - 08:10 AM

A certain young fellow named Pugh (no relation, of course)
Lived on underpants scrapings and spew.
When he couldn't get that
He'd eat what he shat
And fine tasty shit he shat, too.

(Sod's opera chorus) :

That was a horrible rhyme
Sing us another one just like the other one
Sing us another one, do !

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse
From: GUEST,WillT
Date: 08 Dec 07 - 12:15 PM

There once was a man named Pooley,
Who shagged a hooker named Julie,
The smell of her twat
Clean blew of his hat,
And took the skin right off his left gooley.

There once was a man from the cape,
Who had sex with a Barbary ape,
The experience was horrid,
All arse and no forehead,
And bollocks the size of a grape.

There once was a man named Jimmy,
Who got with a girl named Kimmy,
Her twat was so wide,
She felt nothing inside,
And said his cock was too skinny!!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Bob A.
Date: 08 Dec 07 - 02:14 PM

Not quite on the same thread but a song I heard many years ago had a number of verses similar to the limericks viz,

My uncle 's a country physician
with instruments slender and thin
He only performs one operation
By gum how the money rolls in
rolls in rolls in by gum,,,,,,,,,,, in.

My aunty runs a girls' seminary
saving young girls from sin
she'll save you a blond for a tanner
by gum how the money rolls in
etc

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Aug 10 - 01:55 PM

There once was a woman named Dot
Who lived off pig shit and snot
when she couldn't get these
she'd eat the green cheese
which she scraped from the sides of her twat!!

Aye aye aye aye, disco freaks suck mirror balls
oh sing me another verse
that's worse than the other verse
then toss me around by my willie!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,GW alumnus
Date: 18 Dec 10 - 11:12 PM

OMFG I remember the ay yi yi yi song so well. We made it up in 1990 at about 11PM at the GW offices at Queen's. The verses I remember were...

Your father refills cream donuts
Your mother swims after troopships
Your sister douches with Draino
Your brother buys gerbils in 6-packs
Your mother eats batshit off cave walls

It kinda degenerated after that and I don't remember the rest, but these are original lines created in Kingston, Ontario, Canada

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,johhny guest
Date: 27 Aug 11 - 12:56 PM

There once was a vampiress named mabel.
Who's periods were rather unstable.
By the light of the moon with aid of a spoon.
She drank herself under the table.

Your mother gave crabs to my donkey.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,michael
Date: 22 Sep 12 - 10:50 PM

Kenyon college, 1962

there was a young man from Racine,
who invented a jack-off machine
concave or convex
it could fuck either sex
but oh what a bastard to clean

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 23 Sep 12 - 01:35 PM

Back in the day, the Columbia Band used to travel by bus to away football games. THe standard occupation was to put a dollar each into a pool, and sing limericks. If you missed a turn, you were out. Winner took all. The longest session I recall took us from New York to Rhode Island.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Krash
Date: 27 Oct 12 - 05:15 PM

There's more on that jack-off machine
It was used by the King of Racine
On the thirty-third stroke
The friggin' thing broke
And now the King is the Queen

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: Mark Ross
Date: 28 Oct 12 - 02:19 AM

I once entered a dirty song contest in NYC. My contribution to the festivities was THE CASTRATION OF THE STRAWBERRY ROAN, a parody written by Curley Fletcher, the author of the original (I'm told by Glenn Ohrlin, who I learned the song from, that Curley used to write his own dirty parodies before anyone else could get around to doing so).
I came in 2nd to an Irish fellow who sang the limerick ditty under discussion here. His song wasn't any dirtier than the Castration, it was the way he sang it.


Mark Ross

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Glenn
Date: 29 Nov 12 - 07:18 PM

"Your father gets cum in his moustache"
"Your mother licks moose cum off pinecones"
"Your mother don't wipe, she drip dries"
"Your father jerks off in creme doughnuts"
"Your brother eats those creme doughnuts"
"Your grandmother swims after troopships"
"The troopships requested your father"
"Your sister goes down for a quarter"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Ivan S
Date: 23 Feb 14 - 02:16 PM

A friend of mine used to have a live version of this sung by Bob McGrath (Bob, from "Sesame Street"!!). Has anyone else heard this or, even better, does anyone have a copy?

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Mar 14 - 06:40 AM

There once was this man from Australia
Who painted his arse like a Dahlia
The color was fine ,the design divine,
but the aroma,good lord was a faliure

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Tug the Cox.
Date: 11 Mar 14 - 02:52 PM

I thought that the original post referred notto limericks but to parodies of Cielito Lindo http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yjJDv1IeF8I

The one I remember concerned different kinds of drink...e.g Some like the brandy, it makes them feel randy, but I prefer thr Vino,,aye aye the vino, the vino is so supremo ( whisky/frisky....Rum/to come...beer/queer etc


The Chorus was Aye aye aye aye, si si senora
My sister belinda she pissed out the winda (window) and filled up my btothers sombrereo.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: So sing me another verse that's worse..
From: GUEST,Snooper
Date: 08 Oct 15 - 09:24 PM

There Once was a Man named Dave,
Who Fucked Dead Whores in a Cave,
Tho there isn't much Class,
In a Dead Piece of Ass,
Just look at the Money he Saved!!!!