BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: kendall
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 10:22 AM

Frogs with Ray Milland, Edward Scissorhands, 1 million b.c. I've heard people say they like those pieces of crap!

There was a local movie producer here who made a film titled LOBSTEROIDS. It is the all time worst movie I ever saw. It is about some evil scientist who creates giant lobsters that attack anyone playing rock music.(I like that in a lobster) But, the worst part was, I had a role in it! Gawd, you cannot imagine how bad it was. (the movie)

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Mrrzy
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 10:33 AM

The version of Triffids I saw stuck quite close to the book. I just saw Village of the Damned, which stuck pretty close to the Midwich Cuckoos, too... love Wyndham. But how about Little Shop of Horrors? And kendall, whom did you play? A lobster or a rocker?

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Morticia
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 10:59 AM

Betelguese..(sp?) absolutely loved it.....and any slushy old hollywood black and white you care to mention....Little Women, every incarnation thereof, in fact the more unfeasibly sappy and soppy the plot line, the more I love it.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 11:07 AM

Anyone ever see "The Maze"? One of those "so bad it's good" horror flicks. A newly wed takes his bride to his ancestral castle where he has just been named the new Lord. On their first night, he meets with the family lawyer and returns from the meeting with a white streak in his hair. The family secret is that horrible. After an hour and a half of routine horror scenes, the truth comes out. The true Lord still lives...he is a giant frog who lives in the tower. Seems something went wrong in his mother's pregnancy and as we all know a foetus goes through all the stages of evolution before reaching "MAN". Uncle Harry stopped at frog. And frogs live forever...unless they jump from towers and get squashed on the ground.

"Triffids" book and movie are very different. I love both.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: GUEST,Cigilteach
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 12:01 PM

I had one of those cookies things but I guess it went away.

The Inlaws

I actually wore out the video.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Devilmaster
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 12:05 PM

Hey all....

Probably any of the ZAZ films. My favorite being 'Top Secret!'.

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 12:06 PM

Sinsull! What a blast from the past! I did see The Maze when I was a kid, although I remember very little about it other than frog-boy hopping down the hallways.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 12:10 PM

Oh gawd........I'm with Leej........What a memory Sinsull!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: GUEST,MAG at work
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 12:24 PM

This one is too much fun to quit on, even tho' my preschool group is due in 10 minutes.

Ishtar deserved better than it got. The lampoon of Middle East politics is, I would say, right on.

Hoffman and Beatty were too contemptuous of their characters. If they had had more affection for these losers the movie would have had a lot more life. Still, all in all, the auction scene is a standout. It alone was worth the price of admission.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Peter T.
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 02:18 PM

I think we need category distinctions, between campy bad movies, and movies that are supposed to be good, and are mesmerizingly poor, that one has to admit liking or at least watching with grim fascination as one's critical skills are left pounding at the door saying, "stop," "stop".

In the campy camp, "Glen or Glenda" is my favourite. And certainly, "The Maze" is one of the best of all the worst movies ever, I saw it at age 10. I especially liked the sound of the frog slurping down the hallways late at night. The final scene in the Maze is totally ridiculous. I seem to remember that it had another name though.

I think CP's original idea is for films that one ends up watching again even though you hate yourself for it. "Pretty Woman" is probably that film for me. It is such a dreadful film, so contrived, I hate its disgusting politics, its message is that rich people can do anything they want, shopping is liberating, prostitutes have hearts of gold, Richard Gere is creepy, everything about it makes me want to throw up. But I am sorry to say that when Julia Roberts takes off her blond fright wig, and lets down her hair (hey, scriptwriters, don't you recognise your own myth, you idiots!)and walks around that hotel room in her bathrobe and bare feet, I am (dare I say it) hooked. She really is so incandescently beautiful (like the young Elizabeth Taylor in Ivanhoe, or Kelly McGillis in Reuben, Reuben). But I can't watch the last scene -- it is so vomity that even I have limits.

yours, Peter T.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: JenEllen
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 03:25 PM

Night of the Lepus? Oh yes. It ranks right up there with The Fog and Ghost Story as one of the yearly must-sees. Someone invariably blurts out: "Dammit, Jim, I'm not a wabbit hunter!"

I also have a pirated copy of Tremors that was taped off of the USA channel. It is a perennial favourite because of the dubbing. "Gol-dang worms!"

Strangebrew. "Come over to the dark side, you knob." Granted, it is supposed to be silly, but I can't help loving it all the same. The bit where Hosehead's cape unfurls? It sends me to the floor.

I can't believe no one has mentioned Army of Darkness. Painful.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 03:29 PM

JE, your post reminds me that there is another category here altogehter which is movies that have been rendered ridiculous because of the censored cuts! Blazing Saddles really takes a hit in some of it's cut versions and some of the cuts make no sense at all!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 03:38 PM

Them. Just love that rubber ant.

And a watch over and over has to be Little Shop of Horrors..... every time I'm bored or just a little down, slap it in the vid, whack up the volume and lust after that dentist and his bike!!! Singing along with Audrey makes life a bit better.

Any one of the Police Squad videos, Naked Gun etc.... practically worn out 'the smell of fear'....

Regretably, it was slagged by the critics, but I can't stop watching Men in Tights. That dance routine is something else.... and all the little 'in-jokes' (Bagelle and Locksley.... 12 Century Fox.... meshugganehs?) It's my all time favourite slap it in and watch it....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Bobert
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 03:52 PM

"IT'S A MAD, MAD, MAD, MAD WORLD", hands down...

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:03 PM

I just watched some of "The Jerk" on TV last night, thinking it might be another one to add to the list, but....aaaaauuuugh! I couldn't stand it! And Liz, if you ever come to Hawaii and see a banana tree, you will understand where Audrey II's creator got his/her inspiration. I keep waiting for these banana flowers (which hang straight down) to get up and start singing! I'll try to find a picture to link to.

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:08 PM

I've seen a banananana tree in Tahiti, it had crabs, rather than flowers but I know the general effect.

How about the Tall Guy? Worth it just for the line at the end about the vaccuum cleaner....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Amergin
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:10 PM

not that kind of banana, Liz....

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:16 PM

And did you know:
BeBe Buell, the real life Penny Lane of "Almost Famous", wrote "Shark Bite" which was changed to "Claw Bite", the theme song for "Lobsteroids"?

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: kendall
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:21 PM

THEM with James Whitmore

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: MMario
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:29 PM

'Love at Stake' - set in witch-trial times and Salem; starring Sarah Lee, the town baker- who is accused of witchcraft.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: CarolC
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:37 PM

Harold and Maud is not moronic.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Steve-o
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 04:45 PM

For non-stop laughs, it's "The Phantom Empire", a B Western that combines the genre with Sci-Fi! Gene Autry rides into a cave after some bad guy, and follows him down in a supersonic elevator to an underground world of aliens. You can tell the aliens, because they look like people dressed up in tin foil suits wearing buckets on their heads. An all-time classic, and I love it. Oh, and by the way, Gene sings a few tunes, and plays the D-45, too!!

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Gareth
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 05:00 PM

Nahh!! Must be Robin Hood Prince of Thieves - Yes I know it was't meant to be funny but every time I watch the video tears run down my trouser legs.

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Wesley S
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 05:02 PM

How about "The Giant Claw" including the death scene where you can see the shadow of the stage hand throwing the giant bird into the water. Just awful.

What was the name of that movie with the gorilla in a spacemans helmet?

And any movie with the monster carrying a woman { either in a dead faint OR kicking and screaming } across the landscape.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: JenEllen
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 05:10 PM

And after being subjected to all together too much Channel-4 in my youth, I'll have to add anything that Sammy Terry played on 'Nightmare Theater' to the list. Anybody know if that old ghoul is still around?

Pleasant Nightmares....
~Jen

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Little Hawk
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 06:33 PM

This is a tough one, Spaw. I can name lots of moronic movies, but I don't like any of them!

Peter T. - Agreed! "Pretty Woman" has to stand as one of the most repugnant and creepy films of all time...I absolutely hated it. It made me feel physically sick.

One movie that I like, which I'm sure loads of people think is moronic is "Howard the Duck". I loved it. But I already knew Howard well from the comic book, and that helps. Howard is a cool and sardonic waterfowl, "trapped in a world he never made", plagued by an insane and deluded humanity...great satirical stuff. If Howard had been born a "hairless ape" he would be just like Don Cherry, and would probably coach a hockey team.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: GUEST,Bardford
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 07:05 PM

I haven't seen "Reefer Madness" mentioned. I believe it started out as a US government propaganda film (in the 40's?)touting the evils of marijuana, but it is now a cult fave. Someone gave me a copy a few years ago. I'll have to watch it again, for research purposes.

Mark - I haven't seen "The Jerk" for eons, but I remember it as absurdly funny. "The new phone book is here, the new phone book is here! I'm somebody!" What's changed in the 20-odd year interim?

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Celtic Soul
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 07:12 PM

sophocleese said:

"The Mummy, With Brendan Fraser, Rachel Weiss and Arnold Vosloo. Very silly but quite fun".

Hey now, that's high art you're talking about there.

I completely forgot about the following dreck that I love: "Escape from New York". Much better than it's decades later sequel "Escape from L.A.".

I have to admit (thanks KimC for reminding me), I saw "Scorpion King". And...well...it wasn't bad, really (as action films go). Don't expect the art that is "The Mummy" and "The Mummy Returns" (from which this one is spawned) ;D

However, "The Rock" is better than Arnie Schwarzenegger was in his first attempt at acting.

Oh, and KimC? Have you seen any of Jackies older stuff? Back before he started doing films in English? Ah, for the days of "Drunk Monkey and the Tigers Eye" and "Spiritual Kung Fu"!!

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Angie
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 07:19 PM

I love a fair few of the films mentioned here,Kingpin being up there with the most hilarious, but the best has got to be "Mr Jolly Lives Next Door".

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: kendall
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 07:32 PM

I was the storyteller/narrator in LOBSTEROIDS. It took place in Maine, of course, where else with giant Lobsters.?

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 07:44 PM

Well Hawk, I'm not surprised that you'd love "Howard the Duck"......We'll have to screen it together sometime.....One4 of my all-time favorite movies that I am ashamed to admit I'm in love with.

And LIZZIE.......You can have Steve Martin and the dentist routine....but when I want to feel "madly in love" I fast forward to Ellen Green singing "Somewhere That's Green." The woman has some serious pipes with great control, but that accent........oh yeah...........I shoulda' been a New Yorker.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: GUEST,MAG at work
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 08:08 PM

Now, *The day the earth stood still* has a woman being carried by a monster -- well, a giant robot -- and it's one of the all-time greats.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: SINSULL
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 08:23 PM

"The day The earth Caught Fire"...amazing special effects for its time. And the acting isn't half bad.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Bert
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 09:15 PM

Yup, Men in Tights is great. As is Rocket Man, watched that one twice over, just to see the fart scene again and to catch what I'd missed the first time 'cos I was laughing at the fart scene.

And how about Eldorado!

Is no one going to fess up to a fondness for The Carry On films? Every one is worse and yet better than the previous one.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Jerry Rasmussen
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 09:16 PM

Just Watched Creature From The Black Lagoon. If William Shatner is the King of the Cigar Store Indian School of acting, Richard Carlson was the King of Consternation. Among other movies, he was in The Valley of the Gwangi, It Came From Outer Space, The Amazing Mr. X and Human Gorilla. He did "worried" better than anyone.

Jerry

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: GUEST,jaze
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 09:20 PM

"Hurricaine" with Mia Farrow and Jason Robards. Insipid but with the most beautiful scenery of Bora Bora and one incredible soundtrack!

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 09:21 PM

Ah Bertie Boy, I'll go with you on them.......I love the "Carry On" series! What incredible drivel!!! One of the stations ran a marathon of them every weekend when I was in college and I was hooked.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Art Thieme
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 09:44 PM

One of my all-time favorites that usually gets a very low rating from the critics is a film based on Ernest Hemingway's Nick Adams stories----ADVENTURES OF A YOUNG MAN.

Paul Newman as the punch-drunk fighter, the battler in one segment / tale, is just great. Dan Daley as an alcoholic carnival advance man is too. Michael J. Pollard as Nick's chum is just wacky enough. Fine fall "Up-In-Michigan" photography and the relationship between the boy and his overbearing too narrow parents really hit home for me. I'd give it 3 and a half stars out of 4 at least. But as I said, no critique I've ever read gave it more then 2 stars----usually only 1.

Art Thieme

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Joe Offer
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 10:00 PM

OK, I admit it. Barbarella.
I've always had a "thing" for Jane Fonda.
-Joe Offer-

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Steve Latimer
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 10:08 PM

Many years ago Hockey Night in Canada ran segments of a thirties movie between periods, The King Of Hockey> Gabby Dougan, our hero gets in all kinds of trouble, intentionally takes penalties just so that he can be near his girl who is seated behind the penalty box. The acting was terrible, the stuntmen could barely skate, the plot was horrible and I would love to have a copy of it. I've been searching for years.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Amergin
Date: 23 Apr 02 - 10:14 PM

well..i was always kind of partial to Joe Versus the Volcano.....

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: CarolC
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 12:28 AM

Joe Versus the Volcano is not moronic. It's very deep. C'mon, you know it is.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Bert
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 12:43 AM

Ah yes, Joe Versus the Volcano, I want a set of that luggage!

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 12:45 AM

3 I'm surprised no one has mentioned...

A Boy And His Dog...

Buckaroo Banzi across the 8th Dimension...

and...

Dark Star!!!!

Don't know 'em? Check imdb.com...

;-)

I liked Star Trek 1, and Joe vs The Volcano... and Yellowbeard... but think Men In Tights was just garbage along with 98% of the work that's EVER come from Disney...

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Bert
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 01:28 AM

garbage, maybe, but FUNNY garbage. "Now I must go home alone"

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 02:08 AM

Bert - if it's fart gags that get you, then 'Blazing Saddles' is your movie.... incidentally, the first time a fart gag of this magnitude had been filmed and made it to the big screen.....

Is it any coincidence the governor is called William J Le Petomaine??

Wasn't there a film called something like 'It came from outer space' starring a guy in a rubber suit that was scaringly similar to the Alien plot (ship in space, crew mysteriously disappear, rubber suited alien is eating them)? THAT was moronic.... you could see the zipper in the back of the suit and I'm sure at one point his hands are clearly visibly under a glove that's slipped off....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: SINSULL
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 11:28 AM

I love "A Boy And His Dog"! How about "The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With The Sea"? and "Brother From Another Planet"?

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: artbrooks
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 11:52 AM

"Donovan's Reef": John Wayne playing...John Wayne...with every possible cliche about South Sea Islands. They managed to insult, in a friendly sort of way (1)French bureaucrats, (2)Chinese, (3)people from Boston, (4)the Royal Australian Navy, (5)priests and probably a few more that I've forgotten.

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Amergin
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 11:58 AM

and then there is, Trekkies! a lovely documentary about the people who go to Star Trek conventions and the philosophy of Trek....and how it has affected their lives....(or the lack of them)....

there is even one part where this woman goes to work wearing a star trek button and a phaser....and she has everyone at work call her Captain or Sir....and how she got in trouble with a judge because she showed up for jury duty wearing a star trek uniform....

Subject: RE: BS: Most Moronic Movie You Love**Fess-Up
From: Rich_and_Dee
Date: 24 Apr 02 - 12:30 PM

Two movies come to mind.

"Clash of the Titans". Total bastardization of Greek myth. Harry Hamlin talking to a metal owl. Burgess Merideth looking all kinds of sincere. And totally groovy special effects.

"Straight to Hell". Looks like the director who made "Sid and Nancy" and "Repo Man" had some spare cash and leftover film to kill, so he invited a bunch of friends out to the desert to make a Gad-awful western. Every line is ad-libbed. Every scene is arbitrary. But check out the stars: The Pogues (as Mexican bandits), Elvis Costello as a waiter, Joe Strummer as a bank robber, Courtney Love as a gangster's moll. Grace Slick and Dennis Hopper have cameos. The scene where the cast tries to conduct a funeral without killing anyone is a riot.

Rich