Lyr Req: kafoozalem? kafoozleum? Ka-Foozle-Um

Subject: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Mr Happy
Date: 23 Aug 02 - 07:51 AM

i'm collecting songs similar to 'glory halleluiah, hi rogerum'

anyone have the words to "Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?"

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: masato sakurai
Date: 23 Aug 02 - 08:44 AM

The name may be Kathusalem, Kafoosalem, or Kafoozalem. A "heavy edited version" by Oscar Brand ("Kafoozalem") is HERE. Three unsanitized versions are in Ed Cray's The Erotic Muse, 2nd ed. (University of Illinois Press, 1992, pp. 204-210). Do you want them too?

~Masato

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: GUEST,MCP
Date: 23 Aug 02 - 08:48 AM

There are (at least) 4 version in the DT (under Kafoozalum and Harlot of Jerusalem). Search DT and Lyrics for Jerusalem to see them.

There are also some old threads: Search DT and Forum for Kafoozalum to see and also try Filter for Kafoozalum with Age set to 3 years. (There are threads from 99 and 2000 I think)
Mick

Subject: Lyr Add: KAFOOZALEM (from Sigmund Spaeth)
From: masato sakurai
Date: 23 Aug 02 - 10:33 AM

The original was a non-bawdy song.

"The middle Sixties [1860s] had their share of humor as well as athletics and sentimentality. A bit of nonesense was just as popular then as now. A famous song which has long eluded historians may be safely be listed as of 1866: Kafoozelum, sometimes spelled Kafoozalem. (The former is the spelling in the original edition.) It was published by Frederick Blume, New York, in that year, with the words credited to S. Oxon, 'arranged by F. Blume,' who may himself have been the anonymous composer." (Sigmund Spaeth, A History of Popular Music in America, Random House, 1948, pp. 165-166)

The lyrics and music are in Sigmund Spaeth's Read 'Em and Weep: The Songs You Forget to Remember (Doubleday, 1927, pp. 148-149) (the spelling is "Kafoozalem" here):

KAFOOZALEM (original version)

In ancient days there liv'd a Turk,
A horrid beast, E'en in the East,
Who did the Prophet's holy work,
As barber of Jerusalem.
He had a daughter fair and smirk,
Complexion fair, And light brown hair,
With naught about her like a Turk,
Except her name, Kafoozalem!

Refrain (faster):
My own Kafoozalem, Kafoozalem,
My own Kafoozalem, the daughter of the Barber!

A youth resided near to she--
His name was Sam--A perfect lamb
Who was of ancient pedigree,
And came from old Methusalem;
He drove a trade (and prospered well)
In skins of cats, And worn-out hats;
And ringing at the airy bell,
He saw, and loved, Kafoozalem. [Refrain]

If Sam had been a Mussulman,
He might have sold That barber old,
And with a verse of Al Koran
Have managed to bamboozle 'em;
But no, ah no! Sam tried to scheme--
Stole up one day--The airy way--
And crept into the Turk's hareem
To carry off Kafoozalem. [Refrain]

The Old Man had begun to smoke,
When slaves rushed in With horrid din--
"Marshalla! The dogs your house have broke!
Oh, do come down, and toozle 'em!"
The Old Man wreathed his face in smiles,
Said twenty prayers, Then rushed downstairs
To find a man with three old tiles
A-kissin' of Kafoozalem. [Refrain]

The Barber went to his boudoir,
And, smiling still With great sang-froid,
He took a bowstring from a drawer,
And greased it well with goozalum.
The youth and maid he seizéd on,
And nothing loth, He choked them both,
And threw them in the brook Kedron
(Which flows hard by Jerusalem). [Refrain]

In ancient days--the story goes--
When day was done In Babylon,
And when the silver moon arose
And shone down on Jerusalem,
Amid the crying of the cats--
A sound that falls From ruin'd walls--
A ghost was seen, with three old hats,
A-kissin' of Kafoozalem! [Refrain]

~Masato

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: EBarnacle1
Date: 23 Aug 02 - 10:52 AM

That's the cleanest version I have seen of this song. I've noted it as various other choruses: "...harlot of Jerusalem, daughter of the BABA {or Rabbi}." Or other possibilities.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Artful Codger
Date: 27 May 10 - 07:04 PM

The original sheet music, titled "The Great Comic Songs of Ka-Foozle-Um" and dated 1866, can be found online in the Lester S. Levy Collection. Search for "Ka-foozle-um", including the hyphens.

The tune for the famous refrain may have been lifted from a Scottish song or hymn (according to an indirect reference in the novel "Tim", by Howard Overing Sturgis, pp. 124-5, 1891), but I haven't found out which.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Jack Campin
Date: 27 May 10 - 07:10 PM

The tune is derived from "Katie Bairdie", which dates back to at least the Skene MS of the early 17th century (as "Kette Bairdie").

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Artful Codger
Date: 27 May 10 - 07:28 PM

I love this place. Thanks, Jack!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Celtaddict
Date: 27 May 10 - 07:44 PM

Wow, an eight-year-old thread, and an answer in six minutes. Mudcat is amazing.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Joe_F
Date: 27 May 10 - 09:27 PM

Here is an oddity: a version that was in circulation at my highschool, ca. 1954, as a recitation (no tune, no chorus), and with the name Methuselah.

In olden times there lived a maid
Who did employ a filthy trade --
A whore, a prostitute of old Jerusalem.

Now Methuselah was a wily witch,
A goddamn fucking son of a bitch,
And every cock that had had the itch
Had dangled in the bowels of Methuselah.

Nearby there lived a bugger tall
Who with his cock could break a wall,
And he had fucked in nearly all
The harems of Jerusalem.

One day, returning from a spree --
A high and mighty jubilee --
Methuselah he chanced to see.
(His balls hung well below his knee.)
He led her to a shady rock
And there uncoiled his precious cock,
Forty feet of precious cock,
Into the bowels of Methuselah.

But Methuselah, she knew her part:
She cocked her ass and let a fart
That shot him, like a bloody dart
Into the walls of Jerusalem.

And there he lay, a broken mass,
His cock all filled with shit and gas,
And Methuselah, she wiped her ass
All over the walls of Jerusalem.

At the time, the homosexual overtones led me to speculate that "Methuselah" had originally been male, but in view of the other versions that seems unlikely.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Joe Offer
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:47 PM

Artful Codger sent me a MIDI. He promises to post lyrics from the sheet music.....

---

Click to play

Subject: Lyr Add: KAFOOZLEUM (Oxon & Blume)
From: Artful Codger
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:49 PM

Returning to the high road, here is a transcription of the REAL original lyrics— lord knows where Sigmund Spaeth got his somewhat corrupted version.


KAFOOZLEUM
   Words by S. Oxon.
   Arr'd by F. Blume.
   [Tempo marking:] Merrioso ma non too mucho.

        [1]
In ancient days there liv'd a Turk, A horrid man far in the East,
   Who did the Prophet's holy work, As *Babah of Jerusalem!
He had a daughter sweet and smirk, Complexion fair and dark blue hair,
   With nought about her like a Turk, Except the name **Kafoozleum.

        [Chorus, marked "with feeling"; it is to follow every verse]
   Oh, Ka-foozle-um! Ka-foozle-um! Ka-foozle-um!
   Oh, Ka-foozle-um! The daughter of the Babah.
        [Repeat; the first time forte, the second, fortissimo]

        [2]
A youth resided near to she, His name was Same; a perfect lamb.
   He was of ancient pedigree, And came from old Methusalem.
He drove a trade and prosper'd well, In skins of cats, and ancient hats;
   And ringing at the Ba-ba's bell, He saw and loved Kafoozleum!

        [3]
If Sam had been a Mussulman, He might have sold the Ba-bah old,
   And with a verse of Alcoran Have managed to bamboozle him;
But oh dear no: he tried to scheme--Pass'd one night late, the area gate,
   And stole up to the Turk's hareem, To carry off Ka-foozle-um.

        [4]
The Baba was about a smoke; His slaves rushed in with horrid din_
   "Mashallah! dogs your house have broke; Come down, my lord, and toozle 'em!"
The Baba wreathed his face in smiles, Came down the stair and witnessed there
   The gentleman in three old tiles, A kissing of Ka-foozle-um!

        [5]
The pious Baba said no more Than twenty prayers, but went up stairs.
   And took a bow string from a drawer And came back to Ka-foozle-um.
The maiden and the youth he took, And choked em both, and little, loth
   Together pitched 'em in the brook of Kedron, Near Jerusalem.

        [6]
And still, the ancient legend goes, When day is gone from Lebanon,
   And when the Eastern moonlight throws A shadow on Jerusalem,
Between the wailing of the cats A sound there falls from ruined walls_
   A ghost is seen with three old hats, A kissing of Ka-foozle-um.

[Footnotes]
* An office abolished since the publication of this Song.
** meaning "the light-of-my-soul-and-invigorating-nervine-essence."


Source: Sheet music in the Levy, dated 1866.
Cover says:
The Great Comic Songs of Ka-foozle-um
Played and sun Everywhere.
Imprint: New York, Frederick Blume, 209 Bowery
Stamped: Henry McCaffrey. Music publisher.
The cover pictures three wide monochrome vignettes:
   The young man wooing K, as he kneels outside her window
   The slaves informing the Baba
   The lovers kissing as the Baba approaches with his scimitar

Listing of the great comic songs (available from the same publisher):
   Ka-foozle-um.
   The Jersey Lovers. [by Eugene T. Johnson]
   Advice to Persons about to Marry. [by Harry Clifton]
   Have You Seen Her Lately?
   Matilda Toots.
   My Mother in Law. [by Harry Clifton]

From the cover title and song listing, I conclude that Ka-foozle-um was a stage persona for some comic, probably American, who took the (transgender?) alias from this song. My top candidate would be Billy Morris, who sang "Matilda Toots" and ripped off a number of songs from Harry Clifton.

---

Click to play

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Steve Gardham
Date: 28 May 10 - 05:16 PM

Artful,
My Cramer/Lloyd copy echoes everything in the Blume copy.

Sminky,
Here's one for you. Can you please find a date for first appearance of Lloyd's edition?

Subject: Lyr Add: THAIS (Newman Levy)
From: Reiver 2
Date: 28 May 10 - 11:27 PM

It's a totally different song, but reminds of a similar song called "Thais." [two sylables Thay-iss] [Athanael = ATH-a-NAY-el]

       D                      A7       D
1] One time in Alexandria, in wicked Alexandria,
                                           E7             A7
   Where nights were wild with revelry and life was but a game;
          G             D             A7             D
   There lived, so the report is, an adventuress and courtesan;
                                  A7          D
   The pride of Alexandria, and Thais was her name.

2] Nearby, in peace and piety, avoiding all society,
   There dwelt a band of holy men who'd built a refuge there;
   And in the desert's soli-tude they spurned all earthly folly to
   Devote their lives to holy works, to fasting and to prayer.

3] Now one monk whom I solely men-tion of the group of holy men,
   Was known as Athenael, he was famous near and far.
   At fasting bouts or prayer with him no other could compare with him
   At grand and lofty praying he could do the course in par.

4] One day while sleeping heavily from wrestling with the devil, he
   Had gone to bed exhausted while the sun was shining still.
   He had a vision Freudian, and though he was annoyed he an-
   alyzed it in the well known style of Doctors Jung and Brill.

5] He dreamed of Alexandria, of wicked Alexandria.
   A crowd of men were cheering in a manner rather rude,
   As Thais, who was dancing there, and Athanael glancing there,
   Observed her do the shimmy in what artists call the nude.

6] Said he, "This dream fantastical disturbs my thoughts monastical.
   Some unsurpassed desire, I fear, has found my monkish cell.
   I blushed up to the hat o'me, to view that girl's anat-o-my.
   I'll go to Alexandria and save her soul from Hell."

7] So pausing not to wonder where he'd put his summer underwear,
   He quickly packed his evening clothes, his toothbrush and a vest,
   To guard against exposure he, threw in some woolen hosiery,
   And bidding all the boys "Goodbye," he started on his quest.

8] The monk though warned and fortified was deeply shocked & mortified
   To find, on his arrival, wild debauchery in sway.
   While some lay in a stupor sent by booze of more than two percent,
   The others were behaving in a most immoral way.

9] Said he to Thais, "Pardon me, although this job is hard on me,
   I've got to put you wise to what I came down here to tell.
   What's all this sousin' gettin' you? Cut out this pie-eyed retinue
   Let's hit the trail together, kid, and save your soul from Hell."

10] Although this bold admonishment caused Thais some astonishment,
    She coyly answered, "Say, you said a heaping mouthful, Bo.
    This burg's a frost, I'm telling you. The brand of hooch they're selling you
    Ain't like the stuff we used to get, so let's pack up and go."

11] So forth from Alexandria, from wicked Alexandria,
    Across the desert sands they go, beneath the blazing sun.
    'Til Thais, parched and sweltering, finds refuge in the sheltering
    Seclusion of a convent in the habit of a Nun,

12] But now the Monk is terrified to find his fears are verified.
    His holy vows of chastity have cracked beneath the strain!
    Like one who has a jag on he, cries out in grief and agon-y,
    "I'd sell my soul to see her do the shimmy once again."

13] Alas, his pleadings clamorous, though passionate and amorous,
    Have come too late, the courtesan has danced her final dance.
    Says he, "Now that's a joke on me, for that there dame to croak on me,
    I hadn't oughter passed her up the time I had the chance!"


Reiver 2

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Joe_F
Date: 29 May 10 - 08:27 PM

Reiver 2: That's at http://www.mudcat.org/@displaysong.cfm?SongID=5729. The name is usually pronounced "Tah-ees".

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Reiver 2
Date: 30 May 10 - 11:45 AM

I hadn't bothered to look and see if the lyrics were already posted. My bad! Same lyrics, even if slightly different pronounciation! I used to sing it in company with Abdul-the-Bul-Bul_Ameer The Titanic!

Reiver 2

Subject: Lyr Add: HI HO CATHUSALEM, HARLOT OF JERUSALEM
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 30 May 10 - 11:54 AM

CHORUS: Hi ho Cathusalem, Cathusalem, Cathusalem,
Hi ho Cathusalem, Harlot of Jerusalem.

In the days of old there lived a maid,
She was the mistress of her trade,
A prostitute of high repute,
The harlot of Jerusalem.
(C)
Though she screwed for many a year,
Of pregnancy she had no fear,
She washed her passage with beer,
The best in all Jerusalem.
(C)
Now in a hovel by the wall,
A student lived with but one ball,
Who'd been through all, or nearly all,
The harlots of Jerusalem.
(C)
His phallic limb was lean and tall,
His phallic art caused all to fall,
And victims lined the Wailing Wall,
That goes around Jerusalem.
(C)
One night returning from a spree,
With customary whore-lust he,
Made up his mind to call and see,
The harlot of Jerusalem.
(C)
It was for her no fortune good,
That he needed to root his pud,
And chose her out of all the breed,
Of harlots of Jerusalem.
(C)
With artful eye and leering look
He took out from its filthy-nook,
His organ stisted like a crook,
The Pride of Old Jerusalem.
(C)
He put the whore against the slum,
And tied her at the knee and bum,
Just where the strain would come,
Upon the fair Cathusalem.
(C)
He seized the harlot by the bun,
And rattling like a Lewis gun,
He sewed the seed of many a son,
Into the fair Cathusalem.
(C)
Then up there came an Onanite,
With warty balls smeared with shit,
He'd sworn he would ball that night,
The harlot of Jerusalem.
(C)
So when he saw the grunting pair,
With roars of rage he rent the air,
Vowed that he would soon take care,
Of the harlot of Jerusalem.
(C)
He seized the bastard by his crook,
And with a single look,
Flung him over Kedren's Brook,
That babbles past Jerusalem.
(C)
The student gave a furious roar,
And rushed to even up the score,
And with his swollen cock did bore,
The rapist of Cathusalem.
(C)
And reeling full of rags and fight,
He pushed the bastard Onanite,
And rubbed his face in Cathy's shit,
The foulest in Jerusalem.
(C)
Cathusalem she knew her part,
She closed her ass and blew a fart,
That sent him flying like a dart,
Right over old Jerusalem.
(C)
And buzzing like a bumble bee,
He flew straight out towards the sea,
But caught his asshole in a tree,
That grows in old Jerusalem.
(C)
And to this day you still can see,
His asshole hanging from that tree,
Let that to you a warning be,
When passing through Jerusalem.
(C)
And when the moon is bright and red,
A castrated fern sails overhead,
Still raining curses on the head,
Of the harlot of Jerusalem.
(C)
It was a sight to make you sick,
To hear him grunt so fast & quick,
As he tore with his crooked dick,
The womb of fair Cathusalem.
(C)
As for the student and his lass,
Many a playful night did pass,
Until she joined the V.D. class,
For harlots of Jerusalem.
(C)

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: GUEST,tonyh-j
Date: 09 Dec 11 - 10:30 AM

I Recall the last verse of a version we used to sing in my youth was a wonderful example of alliteration:

And now she has two illegits
little shits with swinging tits
who sold their slits for threepenny bits
those harlots of Jerusalem!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Mrrzy
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 10:58 AM

Wow, Oscar Brand sings a completely different version, I think. I shall seek, and ye shall find when I do. Or soon thereafter.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Mrrzy
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 11:04 AM

Unbelievable. I can't find it. It says "fairest" of jerusalem, and the Baba kicks the guy over the wall...

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:02 PM

The British Library Catalogue has a copy In Ancient Days There Lived A Turk. Ka-Foozle-Um Song, London, 1865, but no details of composer or arranger.

Mick

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: GUEST,Lighter
Date: 10 Dec 11 - 07:21 PM

There can be little doubt that the BL song is that posted by Artful Codger from the Levy Collection with an 1866 (U.S.) date.

Brand recorded two versions rewrittn presumably by himself. One was more or less the clean one, the other a cleverly bowdlerized but still suggestive version of one of the gross parodies.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: 'Hi, ho, Kafuzalem, Harlot of Jerusalem?
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 12 Dec 11 - 02:25 PM

The Levy Sheet Music Collection seems to be inaccessible right now, but I think the following link should work when it comes back:

THE GREAT COMIC SONGS OF KA-FOOZLE-UM.
http://jhir.library.jhu.edu/handle/1774.2/6799

You can also see a musical score for KA-FOOZLE-UM in Songs of Columbia [Columbia University] (New York: Taintor Brothers & Co., 1876), page 50. It says "by permission of F. Blume."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: kafoozalem? kafoozleum? Ka-Foozle-Um
From: GUEST,sarahsez
Date: 12 Sep 14 - 09:18 PM

Hi--Thanks for the chords, Reiver 2. Anyone know the tune or where I could find it? Just found the lyrics typed out on onionskin in the very battered guitar case that used to belong to my father-in-law. The paper is probably over 40 years old. Many thanks!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: kafoozalem? kafoozleum? Ka-Foozle-Um
From: Artful Codger
Date: 13 Sep 14 - 05:29 PM

For the tune to the song "Thais", look here:
Folksong Collector: "Thais" ( http://folksongcollector.com/thais.html )
A MIDI can be found at the bottom of this page:
St. Olaf College: "Thais" ( http://www.stolaf.edu/people/hend/songs/Thais.htm )

The poem was written by lawyer, author and composer Newman Levy, who used the pseudonym "Flaccus". He published it in his book Opera Guyed (Knopf, 1923).

A little more info here:
http://www.stolaf.edu/people/hend/VictoryMusic/NewmanLevy.html

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: kafoozalem? kafoozleum? Ka-Foozle-Um
From: Artful Codger
Date: 13 Sep 14 - 05:52 PM

Also see these Mudcat threads about Newman Levy and his songs:
http://mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=24501
http://mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=86822