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Song Challenge! - Part 88

Áine 30 Aug 02 - 11:54 AM
Amos 30 Aug 02 - 12:27 PM
MMario 30 Aug 02 - 12:36 PM
MMario 30 Aug 02 - 12:38 PM
Áine 30 Aug 02 - 12:38 PM
Áine 30 Aug 02 - 12:42 PM
MMario 30 Aug 02 - 12:48 PM
Bo Vandenberg 30 Aug 02 - 01:04 PM
Bo Vandenberg 30 Aug 02 - 01:08 PM
MMario 30 Aug 02 - 01:33 PM
Áine 30 Aug 02 - 01:42 PM
GUEST 30 Aug 02 - 05:16 PM
Amos 30 Aug 02 - 05:29 PM
Mr Happy 30 Aug 02 - 05:32 PM
Bo Vandenberg 30 Aug 02 - 07:30 PM
Áine 30 Aug 02 - 07:38 PM
GUEST 30 Aug 02 - 08:06 PM
Áine 30 Aug 02 - 08:28 PM
Deda 01 Sep 02 - 01:49 AM
Amos 01 Sep 02 - 02:27 AM
Bo Vandenberg 01 Sep 02 - 04:37 AM
Bo Vandenberg 01 Sep 02 - 04:41 AM
Amos 01 Sep 02 - 11:01 AM
Áine 01 Sep 02 - 11:46 AM
Áine 02 Sep 02 - 09:29 AM
Áine 03 Sep 02 - 01:53 PM
mousethief 03 Sep 02 - 03:43 PM
Amos 03 Sep 02 - 03:57 PM
Aidan Crossey 04 Sep 02 - 05:29 AM
MMario 04 Sep 02 - 08:53 AM
GUEST,Boromir 04 Sep 02 - 10:10 AM
Amos 04 Sep 02 - 10:15 AM
mousethief 04 Sep 02 - 11:12 AM
Áine 04 Sep 02 - 03:00 PM
mousethief 06 Sep 02 - 12:23 AM
Amos 06 Sep 02 - 01:39 PM
MMario 06 Sep 02 - 01:51 PM
Áine 06 Sep 02 - 02:27 PM
MMario 06 Sep 02 - 02:34 PM
Amos 06 Sep 02 - 02:34 PM
Áine 06 Sep 02 - 05:20 PM
Amos 06 Sep 02 - 05:29 PM
mousethief 06 Sep 02 - 07:39 PM
Áine 06 Sep 02 - 11:19 PM
mousethief 07 Sep 02 - 12:12 AM
Áine 07 Sep 02 - 11:31 AM
Amos 07 Sep 02 - 12:42 PM
mousethief 07 Sep 02 - 07:24 PM
Bo Vandenberg 08 Sep 02 - 01:50 AM
mousethief 08 Sep 02 - 02:20 AM
Áine 08 Sep 02 - 02:38 AM
Amos 08 Sep 02 - 10:44 AM
mousethief 08 Sep 02 - 04:01 PM
Amos 08 Sep 02 - 05:07 PM
mousethief 09 Sep 02 - 10:10 AM
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Subject: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 11:54 AM

Hey there, Challenge!rs -- How long has it been since you had a steaming Double Dawg Dip Dare? Well, padnuhs, that's too long! ;-) So, without further a-doo, let's see how you all can tie the tethers of these two true tales together and tell the Mudcat World --

What Happens When A Bird Brain . . .

A part-time inventor who went for a woodland stroll to test out his latest contraption - a bird-feeding hat - suffered whiplash after he was knocked over by a hungry squirrel.

Mike Madden, 48, was walking through woods near his house in Huddersfield, northern England, when a large grey squirrel spied the nuts on a feeding tray mounted on top of his headgear.

The squirrel leaped from the top of a tree and landed with such force that Mr Madden was knocked to the ground and suffered whiplash injuries.

He said: "I was out walking through the woods with my friend Craig Bailey. We had only just started the walk when 'kaboom' - I was on the floor. I didn't see much of what happened, but Craig told me he saw the squirrel flying through the air and land right on my head."

Mr Madden designed the hat so birds could use it while he was walking because he was concerned about their winter food supplies.

He said: "Someone told me afterwards that with it coming up to winter and food being so short, squirrels can be quite aggressive and opportunistic. I wish I had known that before. I've always liked squirrels - but once you've had one land on your head travelling about 30 mph you can easily go off them."

Mr Madden says his bird feeder was destroyed in the assault and he has vowed not to build another.

. . . Meets A Bird Woman?

A woman found living up a tree in Italy told police she had been kicked out of her home by her husband.

The 41-year-old woman was arrested when she started throwing chestnuts at the policemen who spotted her.

Tania Dasilva told officers she had been kicked out of her house in Teramo after a quarrel with her husband.

She said she had "no intention whatsoever to leave the tree."

The woman, who would not say when she was kicked out of the house, started throwing chestnuts at the policeman after they asked her to come down.

She is currently being held at the local police station and has been charged with aggression.

Police say they haven't been able to find her husband yet.



GO FOR IT, CHALLENGE!RS!!

-- Áine (the devilish deity of ditties and the Keeper of the Book)


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:27 PM

Me An' Burl


Tune: Old Blue



I had an old squirrel,
And his name was Burl,
And you can bet he was a good ole squirrel!

Go on, Burl!
You're a good ole squirrel.


I useta feed him
At my door
But I don't live
In a house no more

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


Well my ole man
Got drunk and mean
Meanest man you ever seen

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


He whopped me up
'Longside the head
An' kicked me out of his house and bed!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


Well I left that house
Without a dime
Just about Burl's feeding time.

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


Well, Burl came around
Looking for his chuck
But I tole that squirrel he was outta luck!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


He saw me crying,
And he said "Aw, gee!"
"You can come move in with me!"

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


So me and Burl
We started a life
And I've become a squirrel's housewife!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


I cook them chestnuts
And I make the beds
And Burl, he jumps on people's heads

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


Now old Burl's big
He weighs eleven pound,
And he knocks the humans right down to the ground!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


Don't need no man,
Nor cow nor pail,
Got me a squirrel with a fuzzy tail!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


When Burl an' me
We fool around
Knocks all the chestnuts onto the ground!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


Happiest woman
In the whole wide world
Got my tree, an' I got my squirrel!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!



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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:36 PM

Jane of the Squirrels (tune:Git Along Little Dogies)

As I was a-walking one morning for pleasure
I spied Michael Madden just walking along
His bird feeding hat atop of his noggin
But as he drew near me things went very wrong

Oh me, oh my-oh, don't do it young lady
I know that you think that the trees are your home
The squirrel nearly killed him, and you are much larger
Don't go for the hat, I said with a groan


Mike had his sunflow'r seed, millet and thistle
tastefully spread o'er his head's feeding tray
and artfully spotted about in the clutter
a number of nuts for the big birds today

chorus:

From the branches above him a squirrel did espy him
With winter approching those nuts looked a treat
Without even thinking he soon was a-leaping
And knocked poor old Michael right off of his feet

chorus:

Knocked arse o'er teakettle, Mike lay in the forest
When up in the branches he suddenly spied
Teresa DeSilva a-living the rough life
With a wicked big hunger a-glint in her eye

Oh me, oh my-oh, PLEASE NO! young lady
I know that you think that the trees are your home
That squirrel nearly killed me, and you are much larger
Don't go for the hat, he said with a groan


Oh me, oh my-oh, PLEASE NO! young lady
I know that you think that the trees are your home
That squirrel nearly killed me, and you are much larger
Don't go for the hat, he said with a groan


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:38 PM

Yee-haw AMOS! Excellent!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:38 PM

Damn, Amos -- not only are you 'fast on the draw', you've come up with a real screen spitter!!! ROTFLMAO!!!

Alrightey then, Challenge!rs -- the gauntlet has been tossed from the tree and it's landed right in your collective lap -- Go for it!!

And Amos, here's a Golden B.L.O.B. for verse and chorus:

Happiest woman
In the whole wide world
Got my tree, an' I got my squirrel!

Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!
Go on, Burl!!
You good ole squirrel!


'Scuse me while I go and change my britches . . .

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:42 PM

MMario -- your post crossed my own in the ether . . . Excellent addition to the Challenge!, I must say. Here's your Silver B.L.O.B. for a well-tied tale in this verse:

Knocked arse o'er teakettle, Mike lay in the forest
When up in the branches he suddenly spied
Teresa DeSilva a-living the rough life
With a wicked big hunger a-glint in her eye


-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 12:48 PM

*chortle* of course - no one says what kind of hunger Mike saw glinting in Teresa's eyes...wink,wink, knudge,knudge....

Which is why the song ends there.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 01:04 PM


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 01:08 PM

As I Went Out in Wierdling Wood
A cautionary tale to the tune of "The Darby Ram" or "The Liar"
Words by Bo Vandenberg, August 30 2002


As I went out to Wierdling Wood upon a summers eve
You know I met the strangest folks you never would believe
I hesitate to tell you for you'll say I'm crackers too
But if you come to Wierdling Wood then you can see them too.

Its a lie, its a lie and I know it isn't true
But if you come to Wierdling Wood then you can see them too.

A man who thinks the winter time is much to hard for birds
He built a hat to feed them with thats far to strange for words.
He thought the little dainty things might light upon his brow
But heavy hungry squirrels knocked his head off with a pow.

Chrs:

There's women in the woods me boys 'ahiding from their men
Half way up the tallest tree, somewhere in the glen
But don't you try to talk them down, they're loopy as can be
They'll pelt you for your troubles boys with nuts and bits of tree!

Chrs:

Sigurd he took up the task to catch himself a wife
He built the strongest hat me boys, you'll see in your whole life
He baited it with negligee and purty falderal
Took a walk by the tallest tree and hoped she'd take the fall.

Chrs:

From up atop the tree me boys the hat looked mighty grand
She leaned out on the branches so that she could see the man.
The branch went crack and she fell whack a fearin' she would splat
And tumbling through the atmosphere she landed on the hat.


moral -- slowly

So here's the tale for every male that wants to find a mate
Don't seek above your station, for this truth I must relate.
For Love fell from the heavens but it stopped poor Sigurd's Breath
Another schmuck with rotten luck was brow beaten to death.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 01:33 PM

*BRAVO!*


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 01:42 PM

Bravo and Brilliant, dear Sigurd!! Here's your Silver B.L.O.B. for this mighty morsel of moral(e):

So here's the tale for every male that wants to find a mate
Don't seek above your station, for this truth I must relate.
For Love fell from the heavens but it stopped poor Sigurd's Breath
Another schmuck with rotten luck was brow beaten to death.


Another screen-spitter . . . watch out, dear readers, and put down that coffee mug NOW!

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 05:16 PM

Must be some humongus f---ing squirrels over there, yeah? Jeez! Hmmmm. This reminds me of something. Anyone every heard The Big Effen Bee by Matt McGill? Keep that in mind as you read on...

THE BIG "EF'N" SQUIRREL

A Huddersfield man called Mike Madden
Was strolling along with his pal
He had his new bird-feeder hat on, you see
And was struck by this big "ef'n" squirrel

He'd invented his hat to feed birdies
Whenever he walked through the wood
As winter was coming, he worried they'd starve
The poor man's intentions were good.

But that huge "ef'n" squirrel in the treetop
Spied the nuts that Mike had in his cap
It launched itself off the tree branch it sat on
And landed on Mike with a WHAP.

Poor Mike never saw the thing coming
It hit him right square in the head
He was knocked to his ass, and his nuts went all over
His first thought was that he was dead.

The impact had given him whiplash
He sat there, his head all a'whirl
Craig Bailey, his buddy, explained what had happened
You were struck by this "ef'n" BIG squirrel.

Someone told Mike a short while later
That squirrels get quite bold in late Fall
When the food source grows scarce, they will go to extremes
Now Mike no longer likes squirrel at all.

There's a moral to Mikes little story
So take heed, all you boys and you girls
Don't put nuts in your hat in the north English wood
Or you'll be attacked by these massive bloody "ef'n" squirrels!

Big enough to knock a grown man on his arse, they are!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 05:29 PM

Wow -- mighty nicely turned, GUEST!! Between you, Sigurd, and MM , I'd say this is a mighty sassy crop indeed! Champions all of you!




A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Mr Happy
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 05:32 PM

sigurd,

'But heavy hungry squirrels knocked his head off with a pow'.

would that be a 'curly pow'? or a POW? 8-)


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 07:30 PM

Hey Amos, dont count yourself out of that circle. I dont need to remind you that your piece was first off the mark. I was _certain_ that posting in the first hour would make me first but noooo :)

Third! thats pretty scary :)

Sigurd


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 07:38 PM

*****ATTENTION DEAR 'GUEST'*******

Please, please, oh please, give us a name to put to your song -- Who are you? Don't be a 'guest', please JOIN the 'Cat (unless, of course, you're already a member and are at a cookie-less computer at the moment, which happens to all of us sometimes). The Keeper of The Book cannot award a Golden Cow Chip to an unnamed person . . . Great, great, song!!! Identify yourself, please!! ;-)

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: GUEST
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 08:06 PM

Why, thank ya much, there, Aine (can't figure out how you put that there little thingy above the A in your name.) I'm the same GUEST that belongs to the Song Challenge response about the lady who had her pot of Irish stew knicked off her stove. My entry was set to, "Tis the Last Rose of Summer." I'm a modest guy, but to be honest, I used to be a member who felt rather ignored. I have a song posted in the Mudcat Songbook that sort of reflects that sentiment. I've been back a few times under various GUEST names but haven't signed in again as a member. You might remember another of my contributions. It was the satire on "The Night before Christmas" about the holiday music starting so early and driving people nuts.

Anyway, thanks for the acknowledgement. I'm off to do some singin'.

Cheers


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 30 Aug 02 - 08:28 PM

Why, if it ain't our ol' friend, Gutsy!! Howdy, Guts', ol' pal -- thought I wouldn't find ya, didn't ya?!? ;-) Now, here's your well-deserved Silver B.L.O.B. for this bit of your tail of moralitee:

There's a moral to Mikes little story
So take heed, all you boys and you girls
Don't put nuts in your hat in the north English wood
Or you'll be attacked by these massive bloody "ef'n" squirrels!
Big enough to knock a grown man on his arse, they are!


There ya go -- now, don't be a stranger to these parts, OK?

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Deda
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 01:49 AM

I'll tell my Pa
(Tune = I'll tell my Ma, Words in DT)

I'll tell my Pa When I get home
The squirrels won't leave my hat alone
They pulled it off, they pushed me down
They stole the nuts right off my crown

CHO:
Squirrels are are noisy, Squirrels are bratty
Squirrels are the kings of mean and chatty,
Squirrels are eating off my hat,
Please someone tell me what is that?

With the wind and rain, the hail and sleet,
The birds won't get enough to eat
I thought I'd help them, nice as pie
But squirrels divebomb me from the sky
CHO.

Here they come, like bombadiers
With big fat tails and mean little ears
If they hit me I'll go flat
What was I thinking with this hat?
CHO

Here they come, as fat as pigs,
Flying down from the trees low twigs
There's some woman with them, too
What the hell am I to do?

Squirrels are are noisy, Squirrels are bratty
Squirrels are the kings of mean and chatty,
I wish I'd never worn this hat,
Please someone tell me who is that?


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 02:27 AM

LOL!!! Hahahahaha!! I love it Deda!! I can just hear it with one of them wee fiddles going in the background!! Gute yob!!!


Bro



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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 04:37 AM

Low Fly, The Squirrels From In The Sky
to the tune of "FIELDS OF ATHENRY", see Data Base

With deepest apologies to my friends who love this song.


Neath a lonely northern wood, I thought I'd do some good
And feed the pretty birdies on the wing.
With a tray of this and that, I mounted on my hat
I never thought that I would ever sing.


Low fly, the squirrels from in the sky.
That once, I thought were so, god-damned shy
For the seeds upon my head, they nearly knocked me dead
And I curse them, all the tree-rats I can spy.

The day was nice and clear as I took my bright idea
My hat would feed the starlings in the snow
When from far atop the glen, a Tree-rat took a yen
For a piece of my fine corn, way down below.


Chorus

I never saw its pelt but remember how it felt
At thirty miles an hour it hit my head
Like a rock thrown by a gale, this projectile with a tale
It struck me, and I fell as I was dead.


(The truly evil verse)

By the old infirmry wall
I heard a young man calling.
Keep your wits about you neath the trees,
I fought Famine with my Crown
And the Squirrels they knocked me down.
I'll never stroll again with dignity.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 04:41 AM

The chorus is

Low fly, the squirrels from in the sky.
That once, I thought were so, god-damned shy
For the seeds upon my head, they nearly knocked me dead
And I curse them, all the tree-rats I can spy.

And it comes before the last verse as well.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 11:01 AM

Beautiful job, there, Sigurd!!

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 01 Sep 02 - 11:46 AM

Way to go, Deda and Sigurd!! Two more great songs!!! OK then, here are your Silver B.L.O.B.s for some wunnerful bits:

To Deda for:

Here they come, like bombadiers
With big fat tails and mean little ears
If they hit me I'll go flat
What was I thinking with this hat?


And to Sigurd for this catchy chorus:

Low fly, the squirrels from in the sky.
That once, I thought were so, god-damned shy
For the seeds upon my head, they nearly knocked me dead
And I curse them, all the tree-rats I can spy.


Way To Go, Challenge!rs!!

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 02 Sep 02 - 09:29 AM

Ah come on now, Challenge!rs, I know you've got a couple of more songs in your collective imagination . . . ;-)

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 03 Sep 02 - 01:53 PM

Just popping this one 'up to top' one more time . . . ;-)

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 03 Sep 02 - 03:43 PM

A Little Bitty Squirrel
tune: Little Bitty Tear (a la Burl Ives)

Made up a hat full of peanuts
Took it outside for a spin
But as soon as I got to the park
I nearly got my brains bashed in

Because a little bitty squirrel knocked me down
Flattened my ass on the ground
Without warning, without a bloody sound,
A little bitty squirrel knocked me down

I pictured birds a-roosting on my noggin
Pleased with the food I displayed
Now I've got whiplash, and one hell of a headache
Please call 911 -- I need some first aid!

Because .... (repeat chorus)

Copyright ©2002 Alex Riggle. All Rights Reserved.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 03 Sep 02 - 03:57 PM

Big grin there, MT -- I can just hear ole Burl singing that one (Burl Ives, I mean).

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Aidan Crossey
Date: 04 Sep 02 - 05:29 AM

I've been shamed by Áine and Deda into submitting an entry!

So … to the tune of Killieburne Brae (as recorded by, amongst others, the Dubliners and appearing in Colm O'Lochlainn's Irish Street Ballads Volume One as, if memory serves me right, The Women Are Worse Than The Men"). All of the above a vain attempt to establish some credibility before I drive a coach and horses through any semblance of same by the following!

There was an oul' woman down Italy way
Rifle-rifle-tiddle-aye-ay
There was an oul' woman down Italy way
And she'd lived in a tree for many a day
With me fol-de-rol-da, tiddle-aye-a, fol-de-rol-da fol-iddle-aye-ay

Her husband was nearly driv out of his mind
Rifle, etc.
Her husband was nearly driv out of his mind
With his wife who was perched in the firs and the pines
With me etc.

He tried to get wifey to live on the ground
Rifle, etc.
He tried to get wifey to live on the ground
But try as he might she just wouldn't come down
With me etc.

When charm didn't work, then he soon had recourse
Rifle, etc.
When charm didn't work, then he soon had recourse
To the final solution of physical force
With me etc.

He pelted his woman with big lumps of stones
Rifle, etc.
He pelted his woman with big lumps of stones
She answered each volley with branches and cones
With me etc.

Says she to her husband, "Now war is declared"
Rifle, etc.
Says she to her husband, "Now war is declared
I'll finish my days in the trees like a bird"
With me etc.

And away through the branches the woman did flit
Rifle, etc.
Away through the branches the woman did flit
Though her husband bemoaned she did not care a whit
With me etc.

A year came and went with no sight nor sign
Rifle, etc.
A year came and went with no sight nor sign
And to her departure her man was resigned
With me etc.

One day when out walking his oul' lurcher hound
Rifle, etc.
One day when out walking his oul' lurcher hound
In the branches above him he noticed a sound
With me etc.
An army of finches and squirrels and owls
Rifle, etc.
An army of finches and squirrels and owls
In the branches above him were starting to prowl
With me etc.

Says one of the squirrels "Your former oul' wife"
Rifle, etc.
Says one of the squirrels "Your former oul' wife
Has given us orders to take your oul' life"
With me etc.

"We beasts of the trees have given our pledge"
Rifle, etc.
"We beasts of the trees have given our pledge
That your wife's cruel treatment we're bound to avenge"
With me etc.

And with those words the squirrel leapt on the man's head
Rifle, etc.
With those words the squirrel leapt on the man's head
A ferocious attack left the bugger for dead
With me etc.

But the poor man came round and he prayed on his knees
Rifle, etc.
The poor man came round and he prayed on his knees
And he moved to the desert where there aren't any trees
With me etc.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 04 Sep 02 - 08:53 AM

nice additions.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: GUEST,Boromir
Date: 04 Sep 02 - 10:10 AM

I love to go a wandering
Along the woodland track
And as I go I love to wear
A nut tray on my hat

Valeree, valerah, valeree, valerah ha ha ha ha ha
Valeree, valerah, a nut tray on my hat.

I used to go a wandering
Along the woodland trek
But recently a squirrel dived
And nearly broke my neck.

Valeree, valerah, valeree, valerah ha ha ha ha ha
Valeree, valerah, and nearly broke my neck.

No more I'll go a wandering
With bird food on my head
I'll turn the heating pad up high
Remaining home instead!

Valeree, valerah, valeree, valerah ha ha ha ha ha
Valeree, valerah, remaining home instead.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 04 Sep 02 - 10:15 AM

LOL!! Good one, Boromir!!

Hey TGG -- ya better check out the "No BS: Newfie Nuptials" thread. Jack the Sailor has completely broken the envelope on the meaning of a Song Challenge!! :>)

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 04 Sep 02 - 11:12 AM

Great songs, all!

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 04 Sep 02 - 03:00 PM

Alrightey! I knew y'all had a couple more of 'em under your hats ;-) Here are your 'better late than never' Silver B.L.O.B.s for your respective 'pearls before swine':

To mousethief for this cheery chestnut:

Made up a hat full of peanuts
Took it outside for a spin
But as soon as I got to the park
I nearly got my brains bashed in


To derrymacash for these two shameless verses (and a big thanks for taking the time to honour us with his whim, whigor and whitality!):

And with those words the squirrel leapt on the man's head
Rifle-rifle-tiddle-aye-ay
With those words the squirrel leapt on the man's head
A ferocious attack left the bugger for dead
With me fol-de-rol-da, tiddle-aye-a, fol-de-rol-da fol-iddle-aye-ay

But the poor man came round and he prayed on his knees
Rifle-rifle-tiddle-aye-ay
The poor man came round and he prayed on his knees
And he moved to the desert where there aren't any trees
With me fol-de-rol-da, tiddle-aye-a, fol-de-rol-da fol-iddle-aye-ay


And to Boromir, for this brilliant bit o' wisdom:

No more I'll go a wandering
With bird food on my head
I'll turn the heating pad up high
Remaining home instead!


Great entries from all of you bunch of nuts and tree dwellers!!

-- Áine



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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 12:23 AM

Egad! We have fallen off the page!

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 01:39 PM

Odzooks! Such codwallop grim
Ne'e'r these aged eyes have seen
Perchance the Goddess hears us not?
Or glitches are, in her machine?

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 01:51 PM

Or chances are, the moon most bright
Upon the hill doth give it's light
And thus in vision entranced she be
in matters more urgent then e'er we


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 02:27 PM

Gadzooks!, She cries,
neither hill nor skies,
have kept me from my post,
I have dallied only with my lute,
Laboring hard to find the notes! ;-)


Cross my heart, as soon as I have the chorus tablature finished on the mandolin, I will throw your Chips into the wind with all the whigor and whitality you expect of She Who Keeps The Book!

-- Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: MMario
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 02:34 PM

Dally away - we'll be here when you come back!


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 02:34 PM

This lass, who keeps our Songster's Book
Of gentle mien, and thrilling look
Like unto a morning's summery kiss,
How glad, that she our Goddess is!!

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 05:20 PM

The mando tab is finished, and so is this Challenge! (well, for the moment, anyway!) -- Big muchas gracias, cudos and congrats to all of you (especially the newcomers and re-emergents)!! Great songs from great folks, for sure dude ;-) Here are your promised (and flying) Golden Cow Chips:

Winners of the Double Dip Copper Cow Chip (with Sprinkles) (The Double Dip Copper Cow Chip (with Sprinkles) is awarded for connecting the dizzying dots between two or more Challenge! ideas in a song for any Official Double Dip Dare from the Keeper of the Book):

As I Went Out In Wierdling Wood by Sigurd
The Big "Ef'n" Squirrel by Gutsy
I'll Tell My Pa by Deda
Jane Of The Squirrels by MMario
A Little Bitty Squirrel by mousethief
Low Fly, The Squirrels From In The Sky by Sigurd
Me An' Burl by Amos
A Nut Tray On My Hat by Boromir
The Women Are Worse Than The Squirrels by derrymacash


All the best, Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 05:29 PM

Wow!! We ALL GOT Double Dipped by the Goddess!!

This is one for the annals of History!! LOL!

Thanks, TGG!

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 07:39 PM

Hey! I didn't talk about both topics! I demand a shamrock cluster!

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 06 Sep 02 - 11:19 PM

And the clouds gathered darkly, and thus She Spake:

Did I see the word 'demand' in that last post, mousethief????? Don't mess with TGG, now, boy-o . . . She Who Gives The Golden Cow Chips Can Take Them Away, don't ya know!

Now, I just might change your Chip Designation on the morrow; and then again, I might not . . . depends on what kind of mood I wake up in, don't ya know. Anyway, tonight I am suffering from PMS (putrid mandolin syndrome), and I'm in no mood to brook any break in the Challenge!rs ranks . . . If my tremolo improves with an overnight rest, well, we'll see ;-)

. . . and the clouds turned a dark green and the sky rumbled with blasphemous mumblings in re the Mandolin god and his ancestry . . .


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 07 Sep 02 - 12:12 AM

I meant "demand" in a "ask very politely" sort of way, of course.

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 07 Sep 02 - 11:31 AM

Lucky you, mousethief -- I woke up in a much better mood. So, I will, of course, change your Chip Designation in accordance with your (ahem) very polite request (hehehe). Here ya go, darlin':

Winner of the Golden Cow Chip with Shamrock Cluster (The Shamrock Cluster is awarded for a very high level of imagination, imagery, and/or creative use of language in a song):

A Little Bitty Squirrel by mousethief

BTW - I tried one of Dear Hubby's jazz picks on my mandolin last night before I retired for the evening, and I think I may be able to clear up my PMS (putrid mandolin syndrome) today. Keep your fingers crossed, Challenge!rs -- for a shaky tremolo leads to PMS, which makes for a very grumpy gaelic goddess ;-)

All the best, Áine


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 07 Sep 02 - 12:42 PM

Jeeze, Alex, watchyer step, man!! Ya don't know whatyer messing with here!! We're talking cataclysm, ya piss off the GG too much.

You could have us ALL emulsified!!

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 07 Sep 02 - 07:24 PM

Well, if we are emulsified, at least those who come after us will have excellent gardens.

Thank you, Aine!

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 08 Sep 02 - 01:50 AM

For Mousethief :)
(to the tune of Grandfathers clock)

His double dipped cow chip was too much to bear
So he wanted a cluster of green
For a shamrock he felt he'd endanger his pelt
With a too toothsome venting of spleen.

So then Aine from on high
Sent a cursing on that guy
As its said in these lands to this day.
"Take your Blob Snob, better shut your Gob
Let the Golden Cow Chips Fall where they May."


(grinning) Sigurd.


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 08 Sep 02 - 02:20 AM

Nicely done, Sigurd! :)

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Áine
Date: 08 Sep 02 - 02:38 AM

. . . and the clouds opened, and thus She Spake:

All Challenge!rs hail the humourous Sigurd,
Who has hoisted mousethief on his piturd!

. . . and the clouds closed again, with a wicked giggling fading into the sky . . .


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 02 - 10:44 AM

LOL!!! I love the smell of lime-green ozone in the morning!!

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 08 Sep 02 - 04:01 PM

I hear there are pills for that now, Amos.

Alex


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: Amos
Date: 08 Sep 02 - 05:07 PM

Hey, Alex -- you're the one who dissed the GG and got hoisted on a pit-turd, which, if my dictionary serves, is a pointed wooden cooking skewer with alternating slices of tomato, onion, pepper, and charcoaled cowchip on it....

Not to be confused with a petard, derived from the French word for farts, a small brass cannon used for blowing down castle gates.

No, your fate has to be judged infinitely more interesting -- skewered on a piturd. You want fries with that? LOL!!

A


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Subject: RE: SONG CHALLENGE! - Part 88
From: mousethief
Date: 09 Sep 02 - 10:10 AM

I say, just about time for another song challenge, ain't it, wot wot?

Alex


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