what's the worst song you ever heard?3

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Jul 18 - 09:52 PM

Steve Shaw!!! I also detested that stupid song about Fred and the girls in the backseat. What a dreadful piece of dreck it was! Thanks (I think....) for the memories. At least we can agree on that even if we can't on Bob Dylan. (grin)

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: frogprince
Date: 08 Jul 18 - 09:28 PM

Also way, way down there on my list: "Teddy Bear", by Red Sovine.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 08 Jul 18 - 06:54 PM

Mind you, Send In The Clowns, preferably sung as haltingly, theatrically and tearfully as possible, is also a bloody good contender, as is Don't Cry For Me Argentina. Jeez.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 08 Jul 18 - 06:50 PM

This one, for very personal reasons:

All together now, one, two, three
Keep your mind on your driving
Keep your hands on the wheel
Keep your snoopy eyes on the road ahead
We're having fun, sitting in the backseat
Kissing and a hugging with Fred

Seven little girls in my class, when I was eight years old, decided to enact this song as their party piece in front of the class. Guess who was forced into being Fred. All those smelly little gap-toothed girls a-hugging and a-kissing me. I was never allowed to live it down. It's a recurring nightmare and I'm 67.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Anonymous
Date: 07 Jul 18 - 12:42 AM

My Way ( the narcissists self aggrandizing hymn)
And I Gotra Be Me ( I wish you wouldn't)
are two strong contenders in my playbook.

(True story)
But the absolute worst song I ever heard was in my freshman dorm
when a loudmouth ill mannered brat - who always introduced herself as 'Marsha from Brooklyn' - blasted it out her open windows at full volume so half the quad could hear it. Day and night , 24/7 , Marsha's doting folks must have bought her the most expensive
stereo set on the planet so she could torture her fellow freshmen with the ridiculous
and jejune:

Judy in Disguise (with glasses)

This went on for hours, days, weeks, it seemed like months. We freshmen were
in a tower, and one day, a wise young lady yelled out from her upper floor above
MFB ' hey Marsha from Brooklyn you better shut that damn thing off!'
To which Marsha, sticking her head out the window, replied
'Oh yeah!!!'
At which point, the wise lady from upper floor emptied the mop bucket ( left or borrowed from the cleaning crew) filled with filthy dirty water all down upon
Miserable Marsha's 's head.

Lmao.

Didn't hear that dreaded cacophony again all year. Buy it was too late, to this day
when I tell this story ( which is why I so rarely retell it)
I can still hear that wretched thing thumping in my head - turn it off turn it off turn it OFF!!!!!

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: kendall
Date: 06 Jul 18 - 07:47 PM

The little drummer boy. Can you picture a new mother, sleep denied having to put up with some rug rat beating a drum?

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Mark Ross
Date: 20 May 16 - 04:22 PM

I was booked to play on the press run of The Freedom Train around '73.
We were assaulted by the PA blaring the official song HERE COMES THE FREEDOM TRAIN, recorded in Nashville by Porter Waggoner and the Nashville Philharmonic. I can remember part of one verse;

"George Washington was the engineer John Adams shovelled coal
And Franklin punched the tickets and Tom Paine added soul.",

and it went downhill from there.

Mark Ross

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: keberoxu
Date: 20 May 16 - 03:28 PM

No one has submitted the tune immortalized (?) by Mabel Mercer. She had to sing it; she was in Paris singing at Bricktop's, and two English society gentlemen wrote it for her -- they had deep pockets, the customer is always right, and so on. But it became a standing joke, this song, between her and Cole Porter who was writing truly great songs for her....he got sick of hearing her asked to sing this other song just one more time.

written by Austin C Johnson and Clarence Moore

Thank you for the flowers, my favorite roses too
The moment that I saw them, I knew it came from you
Thank you for this evening, for those happy hours
That we spent together, thank you for the flowers

I shall remember this evening for you've been sweet to me
'Twas heaven on earth to have you here alone with me
Just one more chance to say thank you before we say goodnight
I thought that you'd remember, but
I didn't expect the roses, such roses

Roses of this evening are sure to fade away
But their memory will linger on
When the roses of yesterday are gone

Thank you for those kisses, for that last dance of ours
I'm really very grateful so thank you for the flowers

....and the tune is just as bad.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Vic Smith
Date: 07 Apr 16 - 08:29 AM

Vic, where on earth did you find that?

It has been in a part of my brain since 1962. I hated it then and the hatred has not diminished in the intervening 54 years.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Apr 16 - 02:56 AM

As far as bad songs go I think this takes some beating by Sonseed "Jesus Is My Friend"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Apr 16 - 12:46 AM

I also support Bohemian Rhapsody, which for some inexplicable reason keeps getting voted Best Song Ever, and Jerusalem, now hi-jacked by England's cricketers as their pre-Test anthem.

BR is a funny one to me. At the time, I thought it brilliant but theses days I'm more inclined to think it goes a bit up it's own backside with pretentiousness. Changing tastes eh?

I've never understood the appeal of Jerusalem. I dislike it and cringe when it is used as a sporting anthem. This by contrast I think makes a good one Maybe one day England will find an anthem I like..

Vic, where on earth did you find that? I stopped before the "male choir". I'd heard enough.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Little Hawk
Date: 07 Apr 16 - 12:17 AM

How do you feel about "Raindrops Keep Fallin' on my Head"?

Or "Copacabana"?

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Bugsy
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 10:06 PM

Tie a Bloody Yellow Shaggin Ribbon Round the Poxin Old Bastard Oak Tree.

Makes me want to vomit.

Cheers

Bugsy

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: LadyJean
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 09:33 PM

I once heard "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini" sung in Chinese. It was an experience.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Little Hawk
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 07:14 PM

I just listened to "West of the Wall", Vic. Wow. Pretty awful, alright. I only got part way through it, though. I bailed out shortly after the men's chorus part ended. And, yes...that part IS even worse than the rest of the song, and that is quite an accomplishment!

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Vic Smith
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 02:41 PM

Well, it must be said that the link posted above by Dick Miles and sung (mumbled?) by his namesake is truly awful.

It must be a strong contender.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: The Sandman
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 02:13 PM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Us8esS0I4Bk

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: JHW
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 10:27 AM

I don't know. Brain has thankfully erased all but the memory of the occasion. Somewhere off to the right of the road to the Lake District (West of the M6) there was a Folk Club in an upstairs room.
For the only time in dozens of years of folk clubs I absolutely couldn't stand any more and WALKED OUT AND DOWN THE STAIRS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SONG and have never been back

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Vic Smith
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 07:55 AM

I want to make a strong case for the 1962 hit song West Of The Wall written by Wayne Shanklin and recorded by his wife Toni Fisher. It has every quality that you would expect from a truly awful song and performance:-

* It has deplorably trite lyrics with an appallingly simplified political message that bears no relation to or understanding of the actual facts of the situation at the time.
* It has a simple but irritating tune that stays with you despite it being drivel.
* The singer uses a sickly, sentimental voice that brings thoughts of strangulation; it would seem to have no relevance to the subject of the song
* The strummy accompaniment is puerile even by the low standards of the pop music of 1962.
* The middle eight sung by a male chorus is of a lower standard than the rest of the performance - just when you think that such a thing was not possible.

It is possible to listen to this on Youtube by clicking here but please do not do anything rash or hasty after listening. Please contact me by PM and I will reply with your local Suicide Prevention Lifelines.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Mike Rogers
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 06:08 AM

From the early 1950s, a ghastly song called Twenty Tiny Fingers, the chorus of which is
Twenty tiny fingers, twenty tiny toes,
Two angel faces, each with a turned up nose.
One looks like mommy, with a cute little curl on top,
And the other one's got a big bald spot, exactly like his pop.

The verses are too sickly to print.

I also support Bohemian Rhapsody, which for some inexplicable reason keeps getting voted Best Song Ever, and Jerusalem, now hi-jacked by England's cricketers as their pre-Test anthem.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: BobL
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 03:52 AM

Agree with LadyJean - Honey. Treacle, more like.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Rodge
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 03:45 AM

Any Neil Young whinefest

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Dave Illingworth
Date: 06 Apr 16 - 03:31 AM

Bohemian Rhapsody

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 11:26 PM

Thanks AGAIN to this classic thread for so many great laughs and hideous reminders of truly dreadful songs!

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: LadyJean
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 08:44 PM

"Honey" came out the summer my grandmother died of cancer. I was 13, and got to experience a fair amount of the horror. I have, since then, avoided anything that made terminal illness sound romantic. The Smothers Brothers did a beautiful send up of "Honey" on their TV show.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,DT
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 08:42 PM

[From: Paul Reade - I think Engelbert Humperdinck's Lesbian Seagull takes some beating!!]

We have a winner! :-)
Holy moley, how the average have fallen. Shame on you, Hump.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Rodge
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 10:28 AM

Walking in the air
Jerusalem

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Paul Reade
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 08:58 AM

I think Engelbert Humperdinck's Lesbian Seagull takes some beating!!

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Dave
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 06:39 AM

I can distinctly recall, though its a long time ago, hearing Little Boxes for the first time on the radio on the school bus, driving through Hatfield. It seemed very apposite at the time (though at the time I probably would not have known what apposite mean't). Reading the lyrics again, I think it has stood the test of time.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Dave
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 06:32 AM

Yellow River must be in there with a shout.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: banjoman
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 05:23 AM

Don't really have a contender for worst song ever, but I HATE anything sung by June Tabor.
I did once write song called Fire Auto & Marine about a Dr. Suvundra and a huge Insurance scam. Thankfully the song was never played in public

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Lin
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 02:35 AM

Three songs by Gary Puckett & the Union Gap:
1. Young Girl
2. This Girl Is A Woman Now
3. Lady Will Power

Hate all three songs - geez, seems like he is hung up on young girls or something. Too many songs on the same theme and stupid lyrics.
Not a fan of any of his songs, but especially those three.

I am a fan of Bruce Springsteen and have a few of his albums. I especially like his "Nebraska" album and other albums...but the one song that I could not stand was "Born in the USA" Hate the vocals and lyrics.

I am also a huge John Denver fan. Have almost every album and books about him. But one song I never liked by John Denver was,
"Thank God I'm A Country Boy" (which was featured in the movie too.)
I know a lot of people love that song, gets them clapping their hands and singing along but I just could never stand that song - other then that song I love the music of John Denver and even remember where I was when I heard the terrible news about his death.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 04 Apr 16 - 12:02 PM

Disagree with your premise, keberoxu. Nothing to do with how many times I have heard it, which has been as few as possible. Nobody has 'forced it down my ears' any times that I could avoid it. I think it qualifies from my pov for the thread title because I think it is a patronising & unwarranted attack on the legitimate aspirations of ordinary people. Tom Lehrer described it as "the most sanctimonious song ever written".

Sorry if even this much conflict has made you 'squeamish'; but you chose to defend the song against my animadversions -- on what appears to me the irrelevant consideration that you once heard Pete Seeger, whom you admire, sing it. I have always been much surprised, indeed, that he ever gave it any countenance.

≈M≈

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: keberoxu
Date: 04 Apr 16 - 11:35 AM

Little Boxes is only the worst of songs if you have had it forced down your ears too many times. Only time I ever heard it sung was in concert by Pete Seeger, where the song was enthusiastically received and then we all moved on to the next song, as one does. So thanks for the memories, Mr. Seeger, sir, and nobody else is going to spoil them for me. As for a "do you like" thread, conflict makes me squeamish, so that thread may carry on without me.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: David C. Carter
Date: 04 Apr 16 - 07:34 AM

"Atlantis"
by Donovan,anything by him makes me cringe.

Same with David Bowie

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 04 Apr 16 - 04:19 AM

Little Boxes.

Have refreshed my old thread about it.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Apr 16 - 04:15 PM

Probably something I can't remember or switched off to.

Many would agree that Agadoo is bad but it is catchy and can get one listening.

There is plenty that hasn't even passed my own "listening filters".

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Guest
Date: 03 Apr 16 - 03:29 PM

Fields of Apple Pie / (Athenry)

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,DTM
Date: 03 Apr 16 - 01:23 PM

Though I really like Smokey Robinson, I've always loathed his song "Being With You". Does my nut in every time I hear it.

Also, as mentioned by previous posters, Honey by Bobby Goldsboro is a total pukefest.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: keberoxu
Date: 03 Apr 16 - 12:42 PM

"Dear Santa, Have You Had The Measles?"

I haven't heard the hit version, supposedly by a daughter of Cab Calloway.
This thing got arranged for mixed-voice chorus, and the arrangement turned up at my high school back in the day. Everybody in the chorus vetoed it except for one cheerleader -- I'm not making this up.

The plot of the song is that this little kid's house is under quarantine ( although the lyrics don't use the Q word ) and the kid is afraid that they won't let Santa Claus visit the house with Christmas presents.

And with the choral version, the final chorus pulls a Barry Manilow and jumps up one chromatic half-step, in the major mode. Whilst the chorus in the background, sings in waltz time:

[oomp] Mea-sles!
[oomp] Mea-sles!
[oomp] Mea-sles!
[oomp] Mea-sles!

I was never so proud of my high school chorus as when they refused to perform this song.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Genie
Date: 08 Aug 10 - 12:29 AM

Well, if we're not restricted to "known" songs, I'd have to nominate a song written and performed by a local Portland (OR) band called "The Pipsqueaks" back in the mid '80s.   These guys rode with me from Portland to the Bay Area in my car (riders found via the ride board at Portland State, long before the days of Craigslist), and, aside from their pretty much shafting me in terms of fair compensation for the ride and a couple of them drinking themselves sick in my backseat w/o my knowledge and then puking all over the side of my car, they quickly burned through the batteries in my portable radio by playing a tape of their own 'compositions', one of which was a rock song with everything about it forgettable except for the "hook" line: "She left me to suck another man's dick."

Fortunately, I've never heard anything anywhere near that bad on commercial radio.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Lash LaRue
Date: 07 Aug 10 - 09:48 PM

(God Didn't Make) Little Green Apples
(Bongo, Bongo, Bongo) I Don't Want to Leave the Congo (Danny Kaye and the Andrews Sisters)
Wiggle, Wiggle (Dylan)
Don't Think, Feel (Neil Diamond)
Fandango (Abba)
Sunny
Convoy
Waylon, Willie and Me (David Allen Coe)
Bohemian Rhapsody

Lash LaRue

PS: I'm rather fond of As Time Goes By . . .

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,I'm not here, right?
Date: 01 Aug 10 - 04:10 AM

Anything by Chinn and Chapman (The Sweet, Mud, Suzi Quatro, New World, Middle of the road). "We thought we knew her name/But she turned out just the same." What??
Most of Noel Gallagher's output - tunes are ok but lyrics are just a load of clichés collected together: songwriting by numbers.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: beeliner
Date: 19 Jul 10 - 04:55 PM

I see probably a couple of dozen above that are among my favorites.

"Transfusion" was absolutely brilliant, especially the tag line:

"Barnyard drivers are found in two classes: lane-crowding hogs and speeding jackasses."

When I first heard Peggy Lee sing "Is That All There Is?", I thought to myself, "Is that all there is to this song?" I guess that would be my candidate for the worst.

But give me a day and I'll think of a few more.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Patsy Warren
Date: 19 Jul 10 - 07:32 AM

I have a list of them old and recent:-

Any Old Iron.
My Old Man.
Time to get Ready for Love (what chauvenistic crap).
Roses are Red my love, Violets are Blue (infact any drippy ballad.)
10/4 Rubber Ducky (England's answer to Convoy).
D I V O R C E.
Old Shep.
He's My Japanese Boy.
Baby Sitting Boogie.
Shut Up a Ya Face.
Ernie.
The Smurf Song.
I'm Going Overboard with a Capital O.
Anything by Sonia.
Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep.
Anything that Tony Blackburn reckoned to be great.
But do you love me Daddy (Jim Reeves) retch!!
Any song where pop lyrics have been put to classical music
Motor Biking (singer was a part time Womble).
Chop Chop Chop(Sweet).
They swam and they swam right over the Dam.
Welcome Home.
Your the One that I Want (Hilda Baker's version).
Altogether in a Floral Dance (Terry Wogan).
Captain Beaky and his Band (Keith Michell).
I'm a Tiger (Lulu).
Billy Don't Be a Hero.
I've been to Paradise but I've never been to me (had two crying infants then and I just wanted to grab singer by the throat).
Motown doing Christmas songs (including Michael Jackson just on this occasion).
The dopey song from Pete's Dragon, I love you too.
Gypsies Tramps and Thieves (Cher).
Patches I'm Depending on you Son (depressing or what?).
Bridgit the Midget and the equally bad They call him the Streak both by Ray Stevens.
Any manufactured pink clubby pop pap.
Jive Bunny.

Time to Get Ready for Love is the ultimate worst song I have ever heard.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Midchuck
Date: 16 Jul 10 - 02:50 PM

Surfin' Bird?

D-I-V-O-R-C-E?

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Jayto
Date: 16 Jul 10 - 02:36 PM

I was waiting to see one of mine listed haha. I DISAGREE with olddude as well. 100% totally disagree with you my friend.

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Larry Saidman
Date: 16 Jul 10 - 02:04 PM

Musically: It's a toss-up between What's New Pussycat and Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head.

Lyrically: I have to agree with those who chose "Honey".

On the other hand, I think MacArthur Park like many of Jimmy Webb songs is fascinating. And Seasons in the Sun is a great song--but not the Terry Jacks butchery of the original translation (listen to it by Tom Rapp (Pearls Before Swine), Kingston Trio, or Bud Dashiell).

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: GUEST,Patsy Warren
Date: 16 Jul 10 - 03:57 AM

Grandma we love you (r-e-t-c-h!)

Subject: RE: what's the worst song you ever heard?3
From: Peace
Date: 10 Aug 08 - 09:52 AM

I vehemently disagree with olddude.