BS: I've broken my car #(8-(

Subject: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 07:22 AM

Yes it's true, and it wasn't my fault. I broke the wheel and the man at the garage says "sorry it's a write off, the chasis twisted" and my car so old it's not worth spending big money trying to get it streight again. Now I have no car. Only a bike and I know it's going to rain soon. Can I tow my lemonade trailer with a bike? And sessions are at night , and winter's coming. Boo hoo!

I know something will happen....I bought a lotto ticket!!!

Sad Sal

Subject: RE: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: smallpiper
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 08:53 AM

Well when you win buy the garage and sack the man for not fixing your car!

Cheer up Sal things could be worse - you might have lost the winning ticket or not bought a lotto ticket and your numbers come up or you might not have broken your car - thiis an opportunity to get a new one.

Subject: RE: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: catspaw49
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 09:06 AM

Can't help much from here but for at least a laugh, I give you Adam Sandler's infamous "Ode to My Car"....generally known as "Piece of Shit Car." The parts in parentheses are sung by his backup chorus.

Ode To My Car

Here we go

Piece of shit car
I got a piece of shit car
That fuckin' pile of shit
Never gets me very far

My car's a big piece of shit
'Cause the shocks are fucking shot
And my seatbelt's fucking broken
I got to tie it in a knot
(It's a piece of shit)

I can't see through the windshield
'Cause it's got a big fucking' crack
And the interior smells real bad
'Cause my friend puked in the back
(It's a piece of shit)

(Piece of shit car)
Piece of shit car
(He's got a piece of shit car)
It sucks royal dick
(That fuckin' pile of shit)
100% crap
(Never gets him very far)
Oh fuck you car

It's got no CD player, it only got the 8-track
Whoever designed my car can lick my sweaty nut sack
(They can bite his ass too)
And I got no fuckin' brakes
I'm always way out of control
Eleven times a day I hear "Hey, watch it asshole"
(You fuckin' piece of shit)

(Piece of shit car)
I got piece of shit car
(He got a piece of shit car)
Diesel gas sucks my ass
(That fuckin' pile of shit)
That pile of metal shit
(Never gets him very far)

Oh what the fuck did I do
What the fuck did I do
What the fuck did I do
To get stuck with you
You're too wide for drive-thru
And you smell like the shoe
But I'm too broke to buy something new
Oh fuck me

Well the engine likes to flood
The car always fuckin' stalls
And the seat cushion's got a big rip
So a spring always pokes the balls
(Ouch, ouch, ouch)
Plus the door locks are busted
I gotta use a fucking coat hanger
(What a pain in his ass)
And if a girlie sees my car
There's no chance I'll ever bang her
(He never ever gets da pussy)
Hey shut up
(Piece of shit car)
You piece of shit car

(You got a piece of shit car)
You piece of shit car
(Piece of shit car)
Bald fuckin' tires
(You got a piece of shit car)
No rearview fucking mirror
(Piece of shit car)
Seven different colors
(You got a piece of shit car)
Fucking rag for a gas cap
(Piece of shit car)
Tailpipe makes the sparks fly everywhere
(You got a piece of shit car)
(Piece of shit car)
(You got a piece of shit car)
(Piece of shit car)
Oh the whole town thinks I'm a loser
(You got a piece of shit car)
Cabby give me a push
(Piece of shit car...)

Spaw

Subject: RE: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: GUEST
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 09:42 AM

Lovely!

Subject: RE: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: breezy
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 10:44 AM

I've had my bluebird since 1989, it had 44,000 on the clock, it now has 268,000 and still on the road ,m o t xpires May 2003.no reasonable offer refused

Subject: RE: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Thomas the Rhymer
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 11:37 AM

Go to someone who CAN fix it. If the frame is bent, and I doubt it is, you can drive it anyway. If its all ya got, make it work. Get a used wheel, and a few used parts, and get on with it!
I got a sweet little car that no one would buy for the very same reason, and all the negative talk was BS... a coupla pawts twas aw it twook... and yes, many mechanics, and insurance companies had written it off! ... of course..., I did it myself... ttr

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: harpgirl
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 11:47 AM

...Nathan is going to laugh when I show him this.

I bought him a 1984 Chevy Caprice Classic Wagon for $450. (hey, it's all I could afford). The paneling is peeling off in strips and the paint has faded to rusty brown. It has bullet holes in the windshield....

It has broken door locks, a broken right door, a window that doesn't roll down, the cassette player doesn't work, it sucks oil and antifreeze, it belches gray smoke out the tailpipe when it starts. We put $275 into it to make it street legal when we first found it.
It takes $27 to fill up the tank and it only lasts six days. The starter blew out a few weeks ago and I had to have it towed and that repair cost $175. The mirror fell off last week and we had to figure out how to glue that on...It costs a fortune to insure....

But hey, it's got good air conditioning, fuzzy dice, and it gets him back and forth to community college and has liberated me from chauffer duty on top of every other damn responsibility I have...


He gets to keep his piece of shit until he can buy himself a new one!

I hope you find another beater, Mrs. Lemon...good luck!

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Amos
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 12:26 PM

Mrs Lemon:

Thomas is right, If you still have the car, something can be done to make it runnable, even if it isn't all you want.

A

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: kendall
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 12:30 PM

A word of wisdom to all who need a car. Get someone who knows what the hell they are doing to find you a good one! Otherwise, you may as well just bend over for the first S.O.B. you meet.

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: catspaw49
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 12:49 PM

Kendall ol' friend....that's impossible.

I spent my entire working life in the auto repair business, ASE cert since 1972, ran a great shop with a top reputation, blah,blah,blah.........We looked at many cars for our customers and we always gave them this final piece of advice (Had a checklist with this printed at the bottom):

While we are good mechanics and a couple of honest schmucks, we are not clairvoyant. We can tell you what is wrong now, problems with this particular model, and things to expect at the mileage on the odometer. What we cannot tell you is that this is a good car. It may be great and give you a lot of trouble free service or it could have a multitude of problems that have yet to appear and aren't showing or even suspect now. We've given you our best, knowledgeable opinion on what this car is like mechanically. Unfortunately, all of this could change tomorrow so please keep that in mind. Thanks, Denny and Pat

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: kendall
Date: 05 Oct 02 - 02:34 PM

I have also spent many years working on cars, selling them and cursing them. What I meant was, get help finding a car that is in good working order NOW. There is never a guarantee. You can minimize your chances of getting a piece of junk if you get help. I've checked out dozens of cars for people, and, never had one turn out bad because I overlooked something. Any good mechanic can diagnose trouble that exists NOW, and that's all any reasonable buyer can expect. The people who built the damn thing only guarantee it for a short period of time, and that when they are new!

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Mudlark
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 03:05 AM

Just want to add my sympathy, Mrs. Lemon, and get well wishes to your car. Serious car trouble is even worse than serious computer trouble...both are frustrating and stressful. Good luck....

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: GUEST
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 03:17 AM

Wow, Spaw!

I's a shame that your not still going.

I'd travel a long way to do business with people with that level of honesty

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: GUEST
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 04:22 AM

your should be you're (of course)

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 02:21 PM

Sorry to hear that Mrs Lemon... my car was sent to the great scrap heap in the sky last year, basically because I could't afford the repairs needed to keep it legal (comfort and looks were never my top priority, as long as it moved). It was a Lada and whilst 8 yrs ago they were much sought after for export back to Russia, since the bottom fell out of the Russian economy 2 years later, you can't now give them away free with a bottle of vodka. Neither can you get working parts because most of the useable ones were sent of to Russia 8 years ago!

It's like losing an old friend, and can be quite traumatic. I hope you find a good replacement soon.

And taking a knowledgeable friend with you doesn't work. I did that when I bought my motorbike. He declared it good value and in working order... it is for him, I seem to have a bad machine aura that just makes it want to stay in the front garden!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 03:07 PM

How did you break a wheel?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 03:08 PM

ive got a Larder as well, it is the top of the range luxury model, with a sunroof and 5 speed gearbox, 9slow,slow,slow, really slow and a bit slower!), it is 5 years old, 1 owner from new and genuine mileage, it only cost me 50 quid, including a good Blasubunkt stereo and an immobiliser!

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 03:23 PM

Hey John - What the hell's an "immobiliser"? A can of pepper spray? A stun gun? An accordion?

Don't leave us in suspenders here, my man.

Bruce

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: catspaw49
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 04:41 PM

No...Probably just has Lucas Electrics.....They immobolized British cars for years.........

Spwa

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 05:09 PM

What's the point of an imobiliser? Lada have the world's best steering lock, the only one that most carthieves think twice about trying to force.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Grab
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 07:06 PM

You can maybe get a second opinion on it?

Trouble is that if the chassis is twisted then, in spite of what Thomas says, it's basically dangerous (both to yourself and to others). If the write-off is due to expensive parts then there may be ways round it (like getting recon parts and doing the job yourself) but if the chassis is gone then the car is beyond any reasonable repair, unless its value is *really* high. The car won't corner properly, won't brake properly and won't drive in a straight line.

But in the UK at least, second-hand cars are getting better value all the time. Used to be you could only get some rust-bucket for sub-£500. For 10 years or so now, though, anti-corrosion has been the order of the day, so car bodies on older cars are now mostly OK. And engines and stuff go on for ever as well, they just get noisier.

Graham.


Graham.

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 08:06 PM

Spwa-Lada's are Russian, not British!
Liz-they will nick anything round ere, Hull has the highest rate of car crime in western Europe, but Humberside Police have recently decided to disband the Veichle Crime Unit!
Graham Graham is right, try to get the bits, and fix it yourself, or look at the car auctions, you can get a good cheap run about for a couple of hundred quid, ask your local main dealer where they send their part exes.

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Thomas the Rhymer
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 08:49 PM

Yeh, grab is right... if it is really bad... but quite often it's minor, and easy to fix. Will you hand me that sledge hammer please? Stand back!!! ttr

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: kendall
Date: 06 Oct 02 - 09:46 PM

I heard you could double the value of a Lada by filling the petrol tank.

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: sledge
Date: 07 Oct 02 - 03:29 AM

Have you heard of the new 16 valve Lada, 8 in the engine and 8 in the radio.

When I was working in Russia, spare parts for these things could be bought almost anywhere, I remeber goinginto a music store and seeing spare doors lined up for sale? another one was a food store that had a Lada Bonnet (hood) hanging from the wall for sale.

Sledge

:0)

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Hrothgar
Date: 07 Oct 02 - 06:28 AM

I'd like a windscreen wiper for my Lada.

Okay, that's a fair swap.

:-)

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: catspaw49
Date: 07 Oct 02 - 06:45 AM

I believe that Lada's are featured in the latest action flick shot in Hull, Punch the Horse Gets Their Hat Blown.......Available on DVD.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Schantieman
Date: 07 Oct 02 - 06:58 AM

Hi Sal

What a pain! Have you tried a bike on the trailer!? Hope you can sort it out.

Steve

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: GUEST,Used Car Salesman
Date: 07 Oct 02 - 07:08 AM

Make sure the next one is not a:

Lemon
or make it a red one (oh wahtagiveaway)

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 16 Oct 02 - 07:37 AM

Well this is the story so far:

The man at the garage had a good look and decided he could fix it after all. I phoned this brill number called 'Find a part' and within half an hour two breakers yards got in touch, and are supplying the parts needed. I have a Mitzubishi Colt and there aren't many of them around that have been pranged. Anyway we are just waiting for the parts and hopefully all will be ok.

Mean while a fellow Rapquillion has lent me a 12 seater bus. Now I want that and travel around living in it. My kids do not agree with me, but they've always said I'm crazey! I can dream a bit tho' can't I?

Thanks everyone for you encouragement.

Sal

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Guessed
Date: 16 Oct 02 - 10:49 AM

So do you now sing - "She, car go. She, car go - that toddlin'...."?

d8^)

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 16 Oct 02 - 11:10 AM

Yes..well....almost. Also 'Three wheels on my wagon'

You should see the song sheet for one of hymns that Rapsquillion sing. The word we are s'posed to sing is 'reserection' but our dearly beloved Keith put...nah, I'll leave you to work that one out but it does contain a colour!!

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-(
From: Mr Red
Date: 17 Oct 02 - 09:19 AM

res? what colour would that be? but I think I understand the constructs involved.

"Wheel meet again - don't know where, don't know when......."

chassis left, chassis right and ......... and (turning) circle left. The hornpipe will drop off next!!!

Subject: RE: BS: I've broken my car #(8-( uk
From: the lemonade lady
Date: 04 Nov 02 - 01:38 PM

Wheel definately meet again Sir, all's well and my little car is back on the road. I must recommend 'Find a Part'. You phone 'em and they put your needs on a web site and hey presto!! Breakers yards from all over the country phone within half an hour with the bits you need.

So I won't be keeping the 12 seater bus I've been driving around while my car was off the road. I do want a bus tho' I loved driving it so much!

Sal