BS: Australia falls into the trap

Subject: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: greg stephens
Date: 07 Nov 02 - 01:18 PM

Ha, these antipodean colonial fools. Fancy not realising that our wily bowlers were deliberately encouraging their batsmen to tire themselves out. We've got'em where we want them now.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Nov 02 - 01:48 PM

Ha! not so foolish that we failed to recognise your fiendish'ly clever plot. (you swines) To prepare them for the ordeal they were fed multi vitamin pills, washed down by good antipodean colonial beer. The only thing that will stop them now is rain or intestinal gas.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Linda Kelly
Date: 07 Nov 02 - 04:56 PM

Nobody does failure like an English cricket team.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 07 Nov 02 - 05:20 PM

The thing that we plucky Brits are best at.... snatching defeat from the jaws of victory!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Nov 02 - 05:58 PM

I just that Australia really give the English team right gubbin, (Gubbin in Scotland means a right kickinggg at Cricket)

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Helen
Date: 07 Nov 02 - 10:09 PM

Sorry! I've blundered into the wrong room. Here I thought you would be telling us about how little Johnny Howard fell into Shrub's trap of publicly announcing that Oz would go "All the Way" with Shrub's warmongering announcements, and that's why our people were targeted in the recent Bali bombing.

Sorry. Thought this was about something that just "was not cricket" but what you are talking about *is* cricket. Yawn, just *yawn*-leav-*yawn*-ing.

Helen
;->

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Hrothgar
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 02:56 AM

We've just gone quiet after the second day's play.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 08:59 AM

Yeah, Hrothgar - maybe Greg was right after all?

Still, did you hear that the poms have run another of their navy ships aground; a sub this time, somewhere in Scotland, I think.

Nyanya.

Allan

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 09:42 AM

Thanks Greg. I hadn't understood why we had put them in to bat. The best guess I had made was that we had developed a new techinique of whacking Warne for sixes and wanted to wait until the pitch turns at its most to demonstrate our ability to the full, knowing this would leave the Aussies completely demoralised for the remainder of the series.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: EBarnacle1
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 10:23 AM

As a member from the other side of the pond, I find a lot of the above completely incomprehensible.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: greg stephens
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 06:34 PM

Sorry. I dont understand baseball either, it's a kind of rounders isnt it?

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Helen
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 07:27 PM

Nah, Greg, I thought it was more like that girly-game called Vigoro.

Helen

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Hrothgar
Date: 08 Nov 02 - 10:53 PM

There is, I admit, a tendency for cricket lovers to not really care whether or not other people understand the subject.

Couple of quick wickets, greg. Poms in trouble again.

And you have to play the All Blacks tonight (our time), too, while the Wobblies take on Ireland.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Nov 02 - 09:49 AM

greg, it looks like you were wrong. I have just read that the pitch is starting to show signs of inconsistent bounce and is taking more and more spin.

It sounds as if conditions will be perfect to test my theory. It seems I at least got that bit right. I wish I was more optimistic about our execution of the plan than I am.

Seriously, why the hell did we put them in to bat?

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Big Tim
Date: 09 Nov 02 - 11:24 AM

Well they did in Dublin at the rugby. Ireland -19, Oz -9. Ireland's first win there against Oz since 1968.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Hrothgar
Date: 10 Nov 02 - 03:00 AM

The Irish only scored 18 points - don't exaggerate. Just remember, you're in the same pool as us for the World Cup.

...but we made up for it on the English cricketers. 79 all out, and a monumental loss.

We'll find out next week what the English Rugby players can do to follow their narrow win over the Blacks.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Nov 02 - 03:18 AM

Like I said, snatching defeat from the jaws......

It's what we do best, but you lot all practice before hand which spoils the fun.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: allanwill
Date: 10 Nov 02 - 09:49 AM

There should be a Royal Commission into the English cricket team.

Fair dinkum, the Poms are an absolute disgrace! They are doing so much harm to the game by their unprofessional attitude and total inability to provide even token resistance to a side that could only manage 3 draws against New Zealand last year, and is going through its own inner turmoil at the moment.

Hey fellas - a test goes for 5 days, you know. You don't have to play it like two one-dayers.

Allan

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Gareth
Date: 10 Nov 02 - 03:21 PM

Wales 54 - Fiji 14

and the Canadians next.

Gareth

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Big Tim
Date: 10 Nov 02 - 04:00 PM

Sorry H. my mistake. I got carried away. I don't understand rugby let alone cricket!

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 11 Nov 02 - 01:10 AM

Oh, I get it. They're telling screamingly funny jokes about cricket. I guess the closest analogy for us Yanks would be something like Michael Tyson and Barry Bonds doing a standup comedy routine.

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Hrothgar
Date: 11 Nov 02 - 04:08 AM

Don't be embarassed, Tim. Some of the Australians played as though they didn't understand rugby, either.

But, gee, the Irish defence!!!

The difficult bit, Mark, is UNDERSTANDING all the really funny jokes about cricket.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Nov 02 - 05:02 AM

What I don't understand is why one earth we had someone run out. Over a day's play left, early wickets lost cheaply, etc. Survival was the only thing that mattered so we go and risk a silly single and throw another wicket away. These people are supposed to be experienced professionals.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Bluesmike
Date: 11 Nov 02 - 06:51 AM

Well now!
Australia is giving a few young'uns a run to 'blood' them before the World Cup. Likewise the All Blacks only had- I think it was 5 permanent players on the park on saturday night. Now to (all kneel) Cricket!!!!!! The Steve Waugh invincables have done it again. the saddest thing I have found is that a number of Australian Talkback people were belittling and gloating which I found offensive- pride cometh and all that. Australia have earned their place at the top of the world ladder but remember 20 years ago when the West Indies swept all before them. Australia responded with the institute of sport getting into the act. By re-invigorating the Sheffield shield so that each State team could now take on any international team. We have alsoheld onto our p[layers through rough patches to maintain the cohesiveness of the team. Most Aussies would prefer to see tests run the full five days and true Cricket lopvers would love to see the poms take it up to us. Sadly this team are already on the run.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Bob Bolton
Date: 11 Nov 02 - 07:14 AM

G'day Bluesmike,

Spot on! Pretty much what I tried to say, just after Hrothgar's posting, on the second day ... but the poor old mudcat went into a seizure trying to comprehend this foreign cricket stuff = and the posting kept failing!

Regard(les)s,

Bob Bolton

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Terry K
Date: 12 Nov 02 - 02:53 AM

Controversial, maybe, but Nasser was right to insert. We have to be realistic. Out of their last 28 tests at home, Australia have won 20, drawn 6 and lost 2 (something like that anyway).

The first test in an Ashes series in Australia has got to be the most intimidating occasion in cricket. Therefore the odds were 75% in favour of a home win, 25% the draw and 0% for us to win. If we had batted first, it would have precluded the draw, making Australia 100% likely to win. What Nasser did was to give us the best chance of getting the 25%.

If we had batted first we would have gone in like frightened rabbits and been bowled out for less than 200. Oz would then have got 500 and bowled us out for an innings victory on the 3rd day. By putting Oz in, then batting fairly creditably ourselves, we did succeed in making them bat twice.

So we lost - but we were expected to. Now that we are feeling our way in to the situation, we may get the odd draw, which for me will realistically be a good result.

And for those who persist in belittling the efforts of the English cricket team, we are currently probably second or third best in the world, even though so far behind Oz.

But, that run-out, oh dear!

cheers, Terry

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Bluesmike
Date: 12 Nov 02 - 05:42 AM

Oh dear
Suth Efrica have probably got the wood on you- but you are right. My ex partner was a yank and trying to tach her about cricket was well- I thing it might have been easier teaching her Martian- Northern Martian not the simpler and more commonly spoken Mid southern Martian- which of course is taught in Australian Schools.
A simple googly belted through cover for four was completely beyond her.when I mentioned deep fine leg she thought I was admiring her girlfriend and that was a dry week. A catch at silly mid on she assumed to be a peculiarity of Australian contract law while four slips was assumed to be a celbration of the gay lifestyle. I am now single and at 47 thats a sticky wicket.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Nov 02 - 08:27 AM

Terry, I'm not sure how much importance to put on them but the ICC rankings place us 5th in tests and 7th in one day internationals. In both cases Australia are 1st and South Africa 2nd.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Terry K
Date: 12 Nov 02 - 12:17 PM

correct, but as you imply, the ICC rankings are not too indicative of real-time, which suggests that SA are slipping away fast. I'd love for England to play them just as soon as the wounds Oz inflict on us are healed! I reckon that it's fairly close for second and third between us, SA, India and Pakistan with the rest nowhere. (You have probably gathered I don't count the one-day game. ;-)

cheers, Terry

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Hrothgar
Date: 13 Nov 02 - 01:43 AM

Aren't you glad you didn't try to explain "bowling a maiden over," Bluesmike?

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Bluesmike
Date: 13 Nov 02 - 07:50 AM

You see Hrothgar, I thought about it and decided that as she was American and had no sense of humour, discretion was the better part of valour.. Brilliant scholar, intellect a mile long but absolutely no sense of humour. Tell me Is it an American trait. The English and Aussies can laugh at themselves but Yanks don't quite seem to have the same ability.

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: Hrothgar
Date: 14 Nov 02 - 01:54 AM

No, I'm not coming into that one. There was another thread on comparative perceptions of humour to cover that a couple of months ago.

Could be a female/sport thing, too.

Ducks and runs, weaving all the while...

Subject: RE: BS: Australia falls into the trap
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Nov 02 - 08:39 PM

Cricket is (almost) logically explained in THE HITCHHIKERS GUIDE TO THE GALAXY. Nobody has yet explained Ruy.