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Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!

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Subject: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 12:58 PM

OK, youse guys! I wasn't gonna start this thread 'cause it seemed kinda in poor taste (at least if you take it seriously). But that recent thread on Changing Song Titles For Aging Audiences proves that Mudcatters don't always let that be an impediment to their fun, so here goes.

Some songs don't HAVE to have their titles changed for senior populations -- it's just that the songs may take on new meaning or relevance!

For example, when you are doing a gig at a nursing home, you might want to steer clear of:

Try To Remember
Don't Fence Me In
Dry Bones
I Almost Lost My Mind
Urge For Goin'

and a few others I can't think of at the moment.

Got any to add to the list?

Genie


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 01:00 PM

Oh, and it doesn't have to be the title that takes on new meaning. It can be a line such as:

"...Suddenly, I'm not half the man I used to be..."

or

"You promised that you'd forget me not,
But you forgot to remember."


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: JedMarum
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 02:07 PM

LOL!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 02:11 PM

Also:

Please Help Me, I'm Falling!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: JedMarum
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 02:12 PM

Well - it won't add to the humor of this thread, but I frequently sing Goodnight Irene to the old folks, and at regular shows. But when I sing to the old folks,

if Irene don't come back to me, my tears will never run dry ...

At the other shows, I don;t mind taking morphine to die - but the old folks cringe at the morphine comment!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 02:20 PM

And in a similarly SERIOUS vein, when I sing

There'll Be Some Changes Made*

I change "...Nobody wants you when you're old and grey..." to "...Life is for living, so we're on our way..." or something like that!

Genie

*This is another title that can take on a new meaning in a nursing home.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 02:21 PM

Just thought of another:

I Wonder As I Wander


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Anita Walker
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 02:39 PM

How about "The Wanderer"?


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Nemesis
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 04:48 PM

"Has anyone seen my teeth?"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: vectis
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 05:15 PM

"Ain't it grand to be bloody well dead"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Banjer
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 06:07 PM

I always thought Grandfather's Clock would be a horrible thing to play for the old folks.

'....and it stopped,.....short.....never to go again.....when the old man........died!

Maybe not though, I guess it all depends on the audience.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: kendall
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 07:15 PM

Blue hairs driving in my lane


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: JedMarum
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 07:22 PM

I sing My Grandfather's Clock to them all the time. They love it, and many sing along. I tell them a bit about the background of the song too.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Charley Noble
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 08:15 PM

Kendall, that's terrible!

I probably wouldn't sing "Bloody Well Dead" unless someone requested it. However, I think they'd enjoy burying "Old Stromalong," especially if we added the verse about "Throwing in stones and rocks, and we don't give a damn if we break the box!"

Cheerily,
Charley Noble


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Mr Happy
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 08:25 PM

'ohhhh! its nice to get up in the morning- but its nicer to stay in bed!'


'maids when you're young never weed an old man'


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Willie-O
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 08:36 PM

Could it be that you're maybe being over-analytical here? If the repertoire is those well-loved, familiar songs, it's not going to be real shocking to any of them...

Once I was at a fiddle contest, and the emcee--you know the type, real cornball all the way--called the winners of the "oldest couple" contest up on stage. They he sang "You're too old to cut the mustard" to the gent and "The old grey mare she ain't what she used to be" for the lady.

Now that even I found a tad disrespectful. Talk about getting personal!

Guy's name was Cletus something-or-other...
W-O


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 09:23 PM

Kendall, Charley, I sing "Grandfather's Clock" for senior audiences every year (on Grandparents' Day and on Fathers' Day, too). They don't seem to be bothered by the "old man died" line. They just think "ninety years" isn't really THAT old! *G*

Mr Happy
"Oh, How I Hate To Get Up In The Morning!" is a favorite among the WWII generation (as it was for their parents).


And, oh, maids should be advised never to "wed an old man," too -- not just never to "weed" him! *G*

But actually, folks this thread was intended to be facetious!

Genie


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Mr Happy
Date: 01 Dec 02 - 11:00 PM

it only hurts when i laarf!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 01:21 AM

Smells like Teen Spirit?


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Jeremiah McCaw
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 05:28 AM

Forget the songs; I'm glad I remembered to take my bass in its gig bag instead of the hard case I bought for it. Somehow I feared the casket-shaped "Coffin Case" (really - that's the brand name) upon which I'd had an artist friend paint a white lily might not be seen in a respectful light!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Declan
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 05:44 AM

Myself and a Friend of mine were entertaining some old folks a while ago and my friend did "Try to Remember" - I managed to stop myself from dedicating the song to anyone suffering from auld timers disease. I know its not funny, but I think that's why we tend to laugh at it.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Sir Roger de Beverley
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 06:53 AM

Anything by that Mr Zimmerman might be in poor taste too!

R


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Dirty Old Git
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 07:35 AM

I'm not allowed to sing any songs in this bloomin' nursing 'ome any more. As soon as I starts, one of the nurses blows the whistle an' they all jumps on me - Big Bertha usually sits on my kisser - which I'd enjoy if it wernt for her flatulence wot knocked me out cold last time. I woz only singing the one abaht "The 'airs on her dicky-dido 'ang dahn to 'er knees". Mindyer, Big Bertha's start well below 'er knees and go all the way upwards and when matron 'asn't shaved for a week, 'er beard goes right down 'er neck.

If any of yer poncey folk clubs wants some real songs - why don't yer give me a go. That also goes for any of you young birds like that Liz the Squeak (I used to 'ave a bird wot sqeaked - but a bit of vaseline used to cure that) or that there Mrs Duck (I like girls wot ducks down) an also that PussyPiddle or whatever she calls 'erself - they all sound like real young go-ers.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: kendall
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 08:40 AM

I'm Heading for the last roundup.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 12:30 PM

Declan, lots of times the nursing home and retirement home residents are the first ones to make jokes about Alzheimer's, arthritis, and even death. I can sometimes join them in the joke, since many of these folks are my parents' age, so I'm not far behind. But if I were a 20- or 30-something telling arthritis jokes, it'd be kinda like a honkie telling black ghetto jokes, I think.

Genie

Good one, Kendall! LOL!
(That's the kind of song title I'm looking for!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 12:32 PM

Never sing "I Can't Help But Wonder Where I'm Bound" -- or, for that matter, "I Can't Help But Wonder Why I'm Bound" in the "locked unit."


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GutBucketeer
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 12:46 PM

Old and in the Way
See That My Grave is Kept Clean - Blind Lemon Jefferson
Fixin' To Die - Dylan
My Back Pages - Dylan
I Want A Good Man (And I Want Him Bad) - Annette Hanshaw
Get Away Old Man Get Away - Frank Crumit

More later

JAB


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Kim C
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 12:50 PM

In the movie Ishtar, which the critics hated but I absolutely loved, Dustin Hoffman's character wrote a song for some regular patrons at the restaurant where he played: I'm Leaving Some Love in My Will.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,JennyO
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 12:52 PM

What about "Me 'usband's got no courage in 'im",
and there was a line in a song which went "I never knew what day it was----"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Scabby Douglas
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 01:24 PM

Definitely not Shel Silverstein's "Still Gonna Die"



Cheers


Steven


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Marion
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 01:53 PM

Genie, I sing "Don't Fence Me In" all the time, and people seem to like it.

Also, I often sing "The Gambler" which people also seem to enjoy, but I'm a little uncomfortable singing the line, "The best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep..."

Marion


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 03:34 PM

Marion, everybody, THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A SILLY THREAD!

I'm not really looking for songs that are inappropriate for nursing homes -- just song titles or phrases that have at least a double entendre in that setting (at least to the staff and many residents)!

If you gave the activity director (or nursing staff) a playlist for an Alzheimer's unit that inlcluded
"Urge For Goin'"
"Don't Fence Me In"
"The Wanderer"
"Headin' For The Last Roundup"
and
"Try To Remember"
they might have to stifle a chuckle.

That's what the thread was about (sort of a sister thread to the one about changing song titles for an aging population).

Genie


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Bill
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 03:50 PM

Get up and go by Pete Seager might just provoke a reaction.
Bill (the sound)


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: X
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 06:28 PM

We once did "Sam Stone" at a VA hospital.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,JennyO
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 07:32 PM

So that the Parkinsons people don't feel left out, there was a song in the 60's called "Shaking all over", not to mention "Shake, rattle and roll".


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Strupag
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 09:20 PM

How about
There were two in the bed and the little one said;
Roll over!

Andy


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 10:36 PM

Jenny O, that's the idea!

And in psychiatric units, never sing:

"Do You Hear What I Hear?"

Genie

Strupag, I always heard that song with a lot more than only two in the bed (usually it started out with about eight and it finally gets down to two).


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: khandu
Date: 02 Dec 02 - 10:49 PM

Dem Bones, dem bones ,dem dry bones...

My Farewell Party

Oh, That Smell, can you smell that smell, the smell of death's around you. (What is the name of that Lynryd Skynyrd song?)

Just Enough to Keep me Hanging On

"Feel Like I'm Fixin' to Die" Rag

k


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: vectis
Date: 03 Dec 02 - 11:24 AM

"In heaven there is no beer"
That's why we drink it here


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: DougR
Date: 03 Dec 02 - 01:52 PM

"I'll be glad when you're dead you rascal you!"

Someone told me Alzheimers isn't so bad. You meet a lot nice new people every day!

DougR


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Argenine
Date: 03 Dec 02 - 10:32 PM

Yeah, Doug, and you get to hear new jokes every day, too!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 04 Dec 02 - 07:46 PM

Oh Death

CB


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Spreznib
Date: 04 Dec 02 - 07:54 PM

either best or worst, depending on the particular nursing home. Harry Nilsson got a british senior citizen's choir to sing along with him (on the album Son of Schmilsson) "I'd rather be dead, than wet my bed.....I'll tie my tie, till the day I die, but if I have to be fed, then I'd rather be dead...."


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: kendall
Date: 04 Dec 02 - 09:12 PM

Doug, you can also hide your own Easter eggs.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 04 Dec 02 - 09:43 PM

and be your own Secret Santa, too!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Genie's Secret Santa
Date: 04 Dec 02 - 11:43 PM

Ah Ah ! there you go trying to sneak some clues out of unsuspecting 'catters, like poor old DougR. I'm not DougR , or M.Ted. I'm just me. Anyhow, they both play much better than I do.

Here's some more songs to what I have already posted:

Feed Your Frined with a Long Handled Spoon.
Grandpa's getting younger every day (a song to sing)
It must be swell to be laying out dead
Let the Zoomers Drool
Long As You've Got Your Health
Never Let Your Left Hand Know What Your Right Hand Is Doing
Papa's Getting Old Mama's Getting Hot.
Please Don't Talk About Me When I'm Gone.
Frank Crumit's "Prune Song"
Shaking the Blues Away
That Chick's Too Young Too Fry
That's My Weakness Now (oi)
Unloved and Unclaimed


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 05 Dec 02 - 12:28 AM

Santa, you already posted to this thread? That'd narrow it down a bit, now, wouldn't it?

BTW,
"That's My Weakness Now" is a perfect one for this thread!

Genie


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Genie's Secret Santa
Date: 05 Dec 02 - 01:01 AM


0
/ \
/ \
[|||||]
0j0
{ <-> ) ---Ho Ho Ho (Heh Heh Heh) .....
( )
(_)


Oh! Christmas time is coming, Christmast time is coming, It's my busiest time of year!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Jenny O
Date: 07 Dec 02 - 03:55 AM

" Everybody's talking at me....I don't hear a word they sayin'...only the echoes of my mind...."


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,JennyO
Date: 14 Dec 02 - 12:08 PM

Just thought of another one:

"Try to remember"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Amergin
Date: 14 Dec 02 - 12:14 PM

Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie - PM
Date: 04 Dec 02 - 09:43 PM

and be your own Secret Santa, too!



is that what you're doing, Genie? bg


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 15 Dec 02 - 06:56 AM

Do you mean am I being my own Secret Santa, Nathan? Nah.

But here's another of those song titles that takes on new meaning in nursing homes:

"He'll Have To go"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 01:45 PM


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 02:00 PM

That "Papa's Getting Old Mama's Getting Hot" sounds like a good 'un. I'd like to hear it.

Genie


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 08:55 AM

I had some friends who were about to start singing 'Lord of the Dance' at a concert for paraplegics. Stopped themselves just in time...

Slight twist on a comment above - Anything by Robert Zimmerframe;-)

On a serious note one of the best songs about getting old is 'Growing old with Naome' by Ralph McTell. Another good one to find, dunno who it is by, is 'Bonny belle of Broughton'.

Cheers

DtG


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 09:00 PM

True story: I once phoned a Life Insurance company regarding cause of death: while they investigated my enquiry and put the phone on"hold", the unmistakable strains of Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust"!!
TB


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST
Date: 01 Oct 06 - 09:40 PM

It's Later Than You Think!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 04:16 AM

there is this line in one version of Knees Up Mother Brown, which contains the line, "I'll saw your legs right orf!"

Not one for the amputee ward.......I have found!

Also in George Formby there are things in Cleaning Windows about spying on old ladies undressing..." more like 80 than eighteen.and theres another verse bout an old maid.......

Okay til you get an audience full of octogenearians. the two verses together....hm. I think not. One at least has to go.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: pavane
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 06:57 AM

Mrs Pavane avoids "Killing me softly"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Mooh
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 07:20 AM

Predecease me, let me go...

Peace, Mooh.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Mooh
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 07:22 AM

Who was that anyway, Engelbert Humperdinck?

Peace, Mooh.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 07:28 AM

An entertainer using a karaoke machine recently visited the nursing home where I work and sang the pop song "Sexbomb". What a choice!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Splott Man
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 07:37 AM

I used to do a lot of geriatric wards and old peopples homes. One of my staples used to be I Gotta Woman With One Leg (by Wizz Jones & Alan Tunbridge I believe). I'd just got to the very funny verse about a glass eye, when in walked the warden, and guess what? she had one.

I didn't get a return booking.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,ibo
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 08:27 AM

If tomorrow never comes    I remember you      litle boxes


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 09:19 AM

I've recently done two short concerts, one for Age Concern, and one for a local hospice.

Most enjoyed songs?

"Hypochondria" and "I'm Awfully Well for the Shape That I'm In".

They laughed and laughed.

Don T.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 11:15 AM

One that actually would probably go over very well in many assisted living and independent retirement residences - but that I wouldn't do in a "Memory care" facility - is the parody of Tom Paxton's "Last Thing On My Mind" written as a tribute to him for his 60th birthday: I Can't Recall What Was The Last Thing On My Mind.

I'm not sure I'd do "If I Only Had A Brain," though. ;-D


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Cruiser
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 11:32 AM

Knockin' On Heaven's Door (at least better than the alternative)

The Devil Went Down to Georgia

Tomorrow Never Comes Slim Whitman

Beyond on Sunset Hank Williams (actually a beautiful song to sing)

I Just Told Mama Goodbye Hank Williams

Long Black Limousine

Little Rosewood Casket

Streets of Laredo (Dyin' Cowboy)


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Scoville
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 11:37 AM

We actually got a REQUEST at a nursing home for "Streets of Laredo". The guy said he was celebrating that he'd lived long enough to avoid dying young.



Swing Low, Sweet Chariot

The old woman's lament (life is a toil and life is a trouble/beauty will fade and riches will flee...)


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: SINSULL
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 11:38 AM

I was waiting my turn in the doctor's office when in "walked" an elderly man with one leg. He was accomapnied by a very concerned son and daughter-in-law.

I have learned to recognize mischief in a man's eyes so I started chatting with him. Poor circulation and diabetes had claimed his leg. He was very frustrated at relying on other people to get around.

"On the other hand" I said "now you can be a pirate." His family looked at me as if I was insane as I crooned "You can't be a pirate with all of your parts." As expected, the "invalid' cracked up laughing.

Might not work in every venue but...


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Cruiser
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 11:48 AM

I Just Don't Like This Kind of Livin'   Ole Hank

I'll Never Get Out of This World Alive! Hank

Slip Slidin' Away   Paul Simon

Slippin' Into Darkness


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: fat B****rd
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 12:32 PM

Warren Zevon has the line "Granpa's pissed his pants again" and The Crash Test Dummies "Someday I'll have a disappearing hairline, someday I'll wear pyjamas in the daytime"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Cruiser
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 12:40 PM

What Time Do You Have to Be Back to Heaven Razzy Bailey

You've Got that Leavin' Look in Your Eyes

Must You Throw Dirt In My Face Charlie Louvin


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 12:43 PM

I don't think I'd do "Old Maid In A Garret."

Not sure about "I Wish They'd Do It Now." Some of the old guys I'm sure would relate, but ...


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Cruiser
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 12:48 PM

Waitin' On Ice

Where are We Goin' From Here?

When the Fire Gets Hot

Your Daddy Don't Live in Heaven


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Cruiser
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 01:14 PM

Life Git's Tee-Jus, Don't It?____Walter Brennan or Carson Robinson

Also "I'm My Own Grandpa" (Lonzo & Oscar) might get a little confusing to them elders 'cause it does for me?ugh, you don't think?nah, they ain't NEVER gonna put ME in one of those places!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Crane Driver
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 06:03 PM

At a folk festival many years ago, a concert was being recorded for the local hospital radio. Vin Garbutt was singing 'The Chemical Workers' Song'. He got to the chorus line "Every day you're in this place, you're two days nearer death. . ." and suddenly realised what he was singing. He kept going, but you should have seen the look on his face.

Andrew


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Fliss
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 06:26 PM

If you think that someone at 70 might be in a residential home. That makes them 20 in 1956 at the height of Rock n Roll. Perhaps we shouldnt be singing White Cliffs of DOver with them, but Elvis numbers.

I do hope they have reinvented homes or abolished them by the time Im a geriatric hippie. We should all have instruments and have a all day session in some sort of senior commune. I wonder if we will all be still contributing to Mudcat.

fliss
ageing hippie


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Geordie-Peorgie
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 06:34 PM

A couple of year ago aah did a charity gig for The Southampton Parkinson's Society and the buggaz asked for (honest).......

Shakin' All Over
All Shook Up
Whole Lotta Shakin' Goin' On

And when aah wez playin' stuff like Jim Reeves & Don Williams one little owld wumman says tiv uz "De ye not knaah any Dire Straits?"

So aah sang So Far Away and Waalk Of Life and the buggaz joined in.

Aah did the gig aboot fower or five times before they decided that 'disco' wez better twice a year than live music

But Great funsters aall of 'em


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Cruiser
Date: 02 Oct 06 - 09:56 PM

I Don't Remember Loving You___John Conlee

What's Your Name (Is it Mary or Sue..)___Don and Juan

Your Memory Ain't What It Used to Be___Mickey Gilley

What's Your Mama's Name___Tanya Tucker

Stone-Deaf, Dumb and Blind___Charlie Louvin


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: InOBU
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 12:14 AM

True Story:
I am singing Irish ballads in an old folks home in New Jersey, lot of Irish folks there... as I am finishing up, an old dear askes me to sing "God Bless America." (I'm not big on patriotic songs... per se... ) SO I explain, and it is true, that as a Quaker I don't swear oaths, or make outward religious showing, that we Friends would not, in our faith use the expression God Bless... anything ( we don't say God Bless you when someone sneezes... ) So the old dear says... "Well you better LEARN to sing it!
Hmmm
lor


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 03:55 AM

Do you realise that songs from *MY* youth (that is, songs from when I was younger, not the toy boy I have tucked under the bed) include such gems as

The Wombling Song - Mike Batt & the Wombles
God save the Queen (and the facist regime) - Sex Pistols
Sing if you're glad to be gay - Tom Robinson
Grandma, we love you - St Winifred's School choir
and The Floral Dance - Brighouse and Rastrick Brass Band with Terry Wogan.

Anyone comes to my nursing home and sings those for me, I'm going to smack 'em with my zimmer frame!

LTS


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 04:08 AM

Van Morrisons 'Precious time, slipping away'....

LTS


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 05:18 AM

Oh ye canna push yer granny off a bus
Only just come to this thread. Makes a nice change to be described as a bit of a goer eh, Liz!!!!!1


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Scrump
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 05:37 AM

What about the one Billy Connolly sang at the Secret Policeman's Ball?
Words here


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: DaveP
Date: 03 Oct 06 - 02:35 PM

What about ---

May the Circle be Unbroken


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 01:06 AM

How about "Goin' Out Of My Head (Over You)?"   

(Maybe that's one to avoid on the psych units.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Ingrid Frances Stark
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 02:31 AM

I'm surprised no one has mentioned the Beatles song with the line: Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I'm 64?
Then there's a song I think was called The Very Unfortunate Man, where his bride takes off all her clothes and then various body parts...

Ingrid


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,Scoville
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 10:27 AM

I was thinking of the parody of "After the Ball" where Mary takes off her wig, false, leg, glass eye, dentures, etc., until "there was nothing left of Mary, after the ball".


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Lady Nancy
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 11:16 AM

A good friend of mine with a somewhat warped sense of humour wrote a wonderful song called "Botox Towers" in which he gets his own back at the nursing home now, whilst he is still able.......... I'll pressure him to let me add the lyrics and tune, cos that was self-penned too. It always goes down well.........

LN


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: The Villan
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 05:11 PM

Don't ask the residents to take their false teeth out and use them for percussion whilst you sing "Smile"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: pattyClink
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 08:15 PM

We were in the middle of singing Mood Indigo in a hospice, having never really listened hard to the words before, "I'm so lonesome I could die" and "cause there's nobody that cares about me, I'm just a soul in misery", felt like an idiot singing that to someone in great pain who needs more visitors. Cross it off the list!


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 07 Oct 06 - 10:07 PM

Ingrid, I do sing "When I'm 64" at retirement and nursing homes.   I point out that Paul was a teenager when he wrote it, so 64 must have seemed really old to him then.   And then at the end, I repeat the last line several times, increasing the age till it ends with "...When I'm 104." :)

A song I definitely don't sing at oldsters' residences (at least without rewriting the line in question) is "There'll Be Some Changes Made Today," which includes the line "Nobody wants you when you're old and gray."

Of course, as I said, this thread was intended to be silly and focus on things like songs whose titles take on a new meaning in the context of the (frail) elderly -- songs like "Urge For Goin'."   But, yeah, there are some songs that seriously ought probably to be avoided in those same settings.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 08 Oct 06 - 12:37 AM

Whoop-Dee-Dee - Whoop-Dee-Doo

I smell a diaper and its all full of pooh

Whoop-Dee-Doo - Whoop-Doo-Dee

I smell a diaper and its all full of pee.

Hand me down my walkin cane, point me to the next latrine

Whoop A Doodle DooDee Doo.

Sincerely,
Gargoyle


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 08 Oct 06 - 09:05 PM

Well, that certainly makes it in the "silly stakes", garg...


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Soldier boy
Date: 08 Oct 06 - 09:44 PM

What about :

Will ye go lassie go
Maids when you're young
Look at the coffin
Rolling home (for wheel-chair escapees!)
Willie McBride
Mothers Lament (By Elsie Houghton - narrated by John Cocking ("Uppards" CD))
Grandma (By Kevin Collier - narrated by John Cocking ("Uppards" CD) )
The Recumbent Posture (By Marriot Edgar and Stanley Holloway -narrated by John Cocking - "Uppards" CD)


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Soldier boy
Date: 08 Oct 06 - 09:58 PM

Also :

The woman sat by the old church door....
( A song I first heard when I was a Scout!)


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST
Date: 08 Oct 06 - 10:02 PM

Don't let that nasty Gargoyle spoil a perfectly fine thread.

I know GANG!!! Let's take his lyrics an make them one better.

Whoop Tee-Gee, Whoop Wee-Wee

Your teeth are green... just like stale brocholi

Whoop Tee-Wee, Whoop Tee-Wit

Your breath smells just like a bucket of sh-t!

Call the ambulance again - I am havinh an attack again.

Whoop a Tilly, What silly, Whoop the tilly-dilly-DooWhap A DooWhap.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Soldier boy
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 10:10 AM

Also :

Growing old with Naomi - Ralph McTell
Ain't no grave can hold my body down/Ain't no grave gonna hold my body down - (See thread with same title here on mudcat)


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 11:51 PM

Good idea Mr. Guest

no one wants a gargoyle making fun of old, fat, crippled, non-gardening, fat folks from Colorado. So, here is MY verse:

Whoop T Chance, Whoopt T France.

I've got a party here in my pants.

Whoop T Dee, Whoop T Dumb

Sit on my lap... You ain't feeling my thumb.

Whoop T Deedle, Dee, Dum, Bun.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 09 Oct 06 - 11:54 PM

SCORE - 100 poster!!!!

Ring Up 100,000 requent flier miles.

Sincerely,
Gargoyle

should one take payment in United, Delta, or Camsco records...one is in default....the other two tetter-tottering.


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: The Walrus
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 03:11 AM

The Parting Glass?

W


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 10 Oct 06 - 07:42 PM

Tom Paxton again - "Can't help but wonder where I'm bound".
From "Steady boys, walk on" - "this will be the last trip home".
And Adam McNaughtan "You're all gonnae die".


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 08:33 AM

Why does brocoli look like a cartoon fart?


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: GUEST,steve benbows protege off line
Date: 11 Oct 06 - 04:16 PM

What about "Burn Baby Burn" or the crap song "The only way is up"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: Genie
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 04:31 PM

Can't Help But Wander, So I'm Bound


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: SharonA
Date: 24 Oct 06 - 06:52 PM

"I Don't Look Good Naked Anymore"


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Subject: RE: Songs NOT to sing in nursing homes!
From: oggie
Date: 25 Oct 06 - 04:26 PM

Tom Paxton again 'Forest Lawns'.

'Life is a Lemon (and I wantmy money back)' Meatloaf (or 'Bat out of Hell')

All the best

oggie


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