BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 22 Jan 03 - 01:02 AM

...when the only parts that don't hurt are the ones that don't work.

O hell. Getting old beats the alternative.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 04:45 PM

When you have to keep checking posts like this because you can't remember if you posted that really interesting thing you thought of last night... but bugger me if I haven't gone and forgotten what it was....


LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: beadie
Date: 21 Jan 03 - 04:23 PM

In Wisconsin (still America's Dairyland), oleomargarine was outlawed until the early 70's. There was a State Senator from Darlington named Gordon Roseliep who made a huge name for himself every year by arguing passionately about all of the perceived evils of the dreaded white stuff with the little yellow dye packet. A lot of folks made regular "butter runs" (for fun and profit)to Illinois and Minnesota to smuggle cartons of the stuff back into the Wisconsin.

Incidently, Roseliep was also the legislator who once argued against allowing pharmacies to display any contraceptive information, advertising, or items where customers (of any age) could see them. He reasoned that if poor folks learned about these immoral things, they would quit having kids and the military would run out of people to draft (the man actually said that on the floor of the Senate in open session).

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 09:23 PM

You remember when oleomargarine only came in white, with a little packet of condensed yellow food coloring inside it that you would press open and 'massage'into the margarine inside the plastic package to make it yellow.

For you youngsters, this was because the dairy industry had lobbied to get legislation prohibiting butter's competitor (margarine) from being sold with the yellow color already added.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 09:18 PM

You remember Grapette and Nehi orange soda.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Gray D
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 07:51 PM

This is a "man" thing as far as I know (ladies, correct me if I'm wrong) but the surest sign of ageing for us chaps is when we start making that "Eeeeeyuhh" sound when we have to bend down and pick something up . . . or get out of a chair . . . or lower ourselves into a chair . . . or . . . well, you get the message.

Men who have not noticed themselves doing this but now start to do so may sink into gloom and despondency when they recognise the trait in themselves. Don't worry, you'll soon forget all about it.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: wilco
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 05:49 PM

I don't know if there are restaurants that are decorated like our "Cracker Barrel Old Country Stores" in other countries. The walls and ceilings are covered with old tools, farm inplements, household appliances, metal signs, etc. bascily, they look like an old junk store, where everything ahs been dusted.
    I knew that I was getting old when I could identify all the old junk.

    My first real "old age scare" was when the children of some of my former teams' players started showing-up on my soccer teams that I coached!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 20 Jan 03 - 04:43 PM

You remember Richard Crenna from "Our Miss Brooks"

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: alanabit
Date: 19 Jan 03 - 12:38 PM

When the most exciting thing you do in bed is finish the crossword.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: gnu
Date: 19 Jan 03 - 07:46 AM

Falling asleep in the rocker just before the show that you were staying up for comes on. And I didn't have the sense to put the VCR on record ! Even moreso, after sleeping in the rocker for 2.5 hours, my neck wasn't sore.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 19 Jan 03 - 07:26 AM

The joke about young Police Officers came true last week - he really MUST have been straight out of Police College, even tho he looked like he would have had to produce Proof-of-age if he went near a bar.

My latest office ID (taken on a digital camera) makes me look like a Russian grandmother - greying hair pulled back from my face (incidently into a pony tail on top of my head!) - but I do look like a Russian woman I knew 20 years ago. Still it's better than my first ID, taken 13 years ago, where I looked like a something on a police poster - armed-terrorist-shoot-on-sight. Intervening pics were better, but ...

sandra (51 in 3 weeks)

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: rock chick
Date: 18 Jan 03 - 06:58 PM

Instead of getting taller you found you have shrunk 1/4"

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 17 Jan 03 - 11:50 PM

The measure of your life begins to weighed in MudCat postings.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Roxanne
Date: 17 Jan 03 - 05:21 PM

Being too tired to go out on a Friday night.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: beadie
Date: 17 Jan 03 - 03:53 PM

Kaiser Fraser automobiles (what old man Kaiser did after the Navy had no more use for liberty ships)

Brusha brusha brusha, new Ipana toothpaste

Car 54, where are you?

Mel Brooks, Howie Morris, Larry Gelbart, Woody Allen, et al as staff writers for Sid Caeser's TV show

3 speed bicycles were called "English bikes"

In rural Wisconsin, directions were given in terms of cheese factories. (Go north on highway C until you come to the third cheese factory, turn left and go about a half mile past the first cheese factory on the right)

One-room schoolhouses

          Ahhh, . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 17 Jan 03 - 03:06 PM

From the DT:    Every Year

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Jeanie
Date: 17 Jan 03 - 02:00 PM

I had not intended posting to this thread, imagining that it didn't apply to me - which, in hindsight, is probably the most telling symptom of all....

BUT... to my horror I found myself getting really rather rivetted to the Indoor Bowls Championships on TV today. And that set me looking for other signs:
- I have started fancying men with grey hair
- There are good programmes on Radio 4
- The Edinburgh Wool Shop has had some lovely sweaters in stock lately
- Most of the songs on "Top of the Pops 2" the other night were *after* my time

Is this IT, then ?

(I have set my daughter on "Hot water bottle, talcum powder and Damart catalogue alert")

- jeanie

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: MikeofNorthumbria
Date: 15 Jan 03 - 10:34 AM

When a friend you haven't seen lately asks "How are you?", and you tell them ... in detail.

Wassail!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Amos
Date: 15 Jan 03 - 09:45 AM

From a friend:

I. started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.

3. I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

5. All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

6. If all is not lost, where is it?

7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

8. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few...

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

16. It's not hard to meet expenses.... they're everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter ..

      I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after.

19. I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU OR NOT!

20. Funny, I don't remember being, . . . absent minded...

Now I think you're supposed to send this to 5 or 6, maybe 10, oh send it to a bunch of your friends if you can remember who they are.

Then something is supposed to happen, I think. Maybe you get your memory back

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 13 Jan 03 - 10:24 AM

When Twice a night means getting up to pee.
When your arms get so short you can't read the newspaper or put your socks on.
When you get given the Seniors concessions without asking.
When people ask you "what is skiffle".
When your clothes are back in fashion again (again).
RtS
(I think I'm losing the will to go on, Nurse, the screens!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: GUEST,Claymore
Date: 13 Jan 03 - 10:07 AM

Hey when God made the Sun, I was bitching about the light...

But seriously I got all forty some odd of them, although I thought Froggy had a Magic Bonger... "Hiya kids Hiya", and the really old Coke machines had the bottles sitting upright in a maze of rails, and you slid the bottle down to a little door, put in your dime, and the bottle lifted out. If you were a Juvenile Delinquent, you waited until everyone was gone and hosted yourself up on the grate to pop the tops off with an opener and stick a straw in to drink several of them dry.

If you can remember:

Riding in a Studebaker next to your mothers feet so your face would be next to the air vent.

Running behind a DDT truck fuming the neighborhood.

Moving out of the city during the summer polio season.

Duck and Cover drills in school.

Coloring books that taught you how to pick out a "Jap" from a crowd of Chinese.

Zoot suits

When television was black and white and round; you went to your neighbors to see one, and there was only one station, which was on for four hours an evening, and the rest of the time displayed a target that went doooooooooo!

But you are really old when you wear your "Hello, My Name Is..." sticker upside down and refer to it frequently in conversations.

And for the ladies; if your 36 D's went to 42 Longs

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Amos
Date: 13 Jan 03 - 08:45 AM

Smilin Jack wasn't on DIck Tracy -- he was a separate and equal comic strip in his own right, alongside The Phantom.

A

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Troll
Date: 13 Jan 03 - 08:40 AM

For me, it was the day I called from the bathroom,
"Honey, I don't look like a 60-year-old man, do I?"
And she called back,
"No. But you USED TO."
SIGH
troll

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Ebbie
Date: 13 Jan 03 - 02:28 AM

Does anyone remember 'Smilin' Jack'? (Was he on Dick Tracy?) You never saw his face full on, not more than a three-quarter view, too handsome, I guess, but one year they promised that soon he would turn and face the reader. Lots of little teasers. Then on the Christmas Day strip, there he was- full face, in all his glory- behind a Santa Claus beard...

Eb

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Bert
Date: 13 Jan 03 - 12:27 AM

Just a few things to add to Rustric Rebel's list.

The biggest aspisistra in the world
Vera Lynn
Alvar Lydell
Pom
Chad
Whale meat
The smell of air raid shelters
Land Girls (and yes of course I was in love with one.)
Coupons
The Marlow Donkey
Conchies
Spitfires
Monday Night at Eight O'Clock
Much Binding in the Marsh
Sam Costa
British Restaurants

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 12 Jan 03 - 11:55 PM

Yuck. What a mean-spirited place, that "ugly people" link. And they have the nerve to ask for money. Hope they go away real soon. . .

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 12 Jan 03 - 11:50 PM

Ooooh, Rustic Rebel, I'm not so old as to not read your meaning into that! Whew! Did I forget to take my HRT this morning? What a flush. . . (ha!)

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: *daylia*
Date: 12 Jan 03 - 10:41 PM

If aging is starting to get you down, check this out!
Not even musicians can run and hide ...

daylia

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 12 Jan 03 - 04:08 AM

Thread Drift;
What was the dirtiest thing said on T.V. in the fifties?


"Ward-You were a little hard on the Beaver last night."

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: GUEST,Genie
Date: 12 Jan 03 - 03:46 AM

-The original Smilin' Ed (with Froggie The Gremlin and Midnight The Cat, who played the violin)
-Kukla, Fran & Ollie
-Big John & Sparky
-Buck Rogers serials at the 25-cent movies
-3-cent first-class postage stamps
-glass pop bottles that had a 10-cent deposit on them
-Captain Video and the Video Ranger
-radio dramas like "Johnny Dollar and His Action-Packed Expense Account," "Gunsmoke," "The Shadow"
-Betsy Wetsy dolls

and if you're REALLY old,

-Lydia Pinkham's Vegetable Compound

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: open mike
Date: 12 Jan 03 - 02:58 AM

has no-one mentioned drive-in movies?
curb feelers? and we had one next to the drive-in:
a trampoline place where there were pits and the
trampolines were set sown in them so the tops were
even with the ground. and how about burma shave signs?
(the Verse By The Side Of The Road is a book about them)

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Stephen L. Rich
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 11:44 PM

What about "Andy's Gang" or the twenty-three different farm kids who owned Lassie.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 09:41 PM

Princess Summer-Spring-Winter-Fall? Big Chief Thunderthud? Clarabelle's seltzer bottle and Aoogah horn? The original Kowabunga sound-byte, long before turtles had names? Nash Ramblers and "Love Forever True" on AM? National Velvet and Tom ("This is my song! This is my song!") Thumb?. Hand-scooped doubledecker cones for 15 cents? And "Wait for Meeee, Wild Bill!" (Sugar Pops are Tops!). Guess you hadda been there, huh? When the only serious cutthroat competition was between PF Flyers and Keds?

A

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: ballpienhammer
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 09:33 PM

open mike, there's still lots of Lionels around BUT do you remember
Mar-X trains? Or, going to the savings bank at Christmas time with Dad, the teller gave each kid a tin bank.; shootin' marbles, playing mumblety-peg? Dig? Boom or Bust? Flinch? Howdy Doody, Ding Dong School, Flash Gordon, Bobby Benson and the B Bar B Riders, Space Cadets, Sky King? Hudson Hornet cars?

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 08:04 PM

Genie - you've met Manitas then..... he's rather older than me....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: open mike
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 08:00 PM

what's moxie?
and Lionel trains got left out of the list...
esp, the ones with the little pellets that
made smoke come out the smoke stack!
mine didn't have smoke except fromthe transformer
when it ran too long and too fast!
i sure do remember the smell of that transformer
when it was hot, though!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 07:10 PM

Glads to hear it Mark. In the Fifties it was still a contender in those parts, as I remember it! :>)

A

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Mark Cohen
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 05:58 PM

They still make Moxie, Amos. At least, they did when I was in Maine (Topsham/Freeport) in 1990. Good stuff! Wish we could get it here in the islands.

Aloha,
Mark

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 04:49 PM

Don, I was gonna add, "You know you're old if you remember:"
Kaiser-Frazier automobiles
Packards
Nash Ramblers
Studebakers
The Edsel

You're also no spring chicken if you ever worked as a car hop. (My nieces and nephews probably have no idea what a car hop was!)

Genie

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: ballpienhammer
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 04:44 PM

First thing to go is your hearing; Second thing to go is your eyesight; and I can't remember the third one...

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 04:42 PM

"Met an old flame, and she was so old, she didn't recognize me."

LMAO, Kendall!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: brother
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 04:32 PM

You know you're getting old when people say "do you remember" and you do.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Don Firth
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 04:20 PM

The first automobile I remember my father owning was one of THESE.

The next one was one of THESE.

The first time I ever flew (in the early Forties, a scenic flight of about twenty minutes duration for $5.00), it was in one of THESE.

The first time I flew someplace (Seattle to Spokane in the late Forties) it was in one of THESE.

The second time I flew someplace (back and forth between Seattle to Denver several times in 1955-56) it was in one of THESE.

Don Firth

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 04:05 PM

"Gee! THANKS, Missus Cleaver!"

"You're welcome, Wally!"

"C'mon, Beave!! Let's go!!"

"Awwww....I can't. I got homework."


LOL

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Tiger
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 03:36 PM

You betchum, L'il Beaver!

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: GUEST,Gloredhel--too lazy to sign in
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 03:13 PM

Rustic Rebel--on that list, the only two things I actually remember are way down near the bottom--metal ice cube trays with levers and Studebakers, because we actually own and use both.
Of course, those items were manufactured when my dad was in high school....

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Joe_F
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 02:57 PM

All the candidates for U.S. president are younger than you are.

The hair on top of your head isn't thick enough to keep the front hairs back.

You get another meal when you floss your teeth.

Before you do anything, you have to do something else, usually piss.

More people pass you on the sidewalk than you pass.

You catch yourself thinking of people in their 20s as kids.

You see an obituary & say "Was that old bastard still alive?"

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Amos
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 01:46 PM

You really gotta get on in years not to recognize Kendall!! LOL!!

A

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: GUEST,Kendall
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 12:45 PM

I went to my high school class 50th reunion. Met an old flame, and she was so old, she didn't recognize me.

Subject: RE: BS: Top Ways To Tell You Are AGING!!!
From: Genie
Date: 11 Jan 03 - 12:29 PM

Or, Liz, how about: never really getting drunk any more, 'cause you fall asleep after two beers!

Genie