Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...

Subject: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: CRANKY YANKEE
Date: 29 Jan 03 - 03:30 PM

Heard this In Soho (London) in 1958. I only remember the first verse and Chorus, as follows:

If you belong to London Town and read the daily press
You'll be convinced by this time, 'ther's a monster in Loch Ness
The cockneys always laugh and say, "H'it don't arf make yuh fink,
Them Hairy Highland laddies get far too much to drink."

Chorus
There is a monster in loch Ness, the fact yuh can nae hide,
She's got more guff than a movie star, and a wiggle three miles wide,
Oh, and a wiggle three miles wide.

Plese helf if you know this song.

Y'r Ob'd't S'v'nt
Jody Gibson.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: Jim McLean
Date: 29 Jan 03 - 04:32 PM

Sung by Jimmie MacGregor and Robin Hall I think, off the top of my head. I can hear the tune so I'll get back to you.
Jim McLean

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 30 Jan 03 - 02:46 PM

She's got mair curves than a movie star
And a wiggle three miles wide.

It goes to a tune a bit like Ian Campbells version of Marilyn Munroe. Like Jim though can't remember the verses. I'll keep searching.
Giok

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: michaelr
Date: 30 Jan 03 - 07:09 PM

Oh, please, somebody post the lyrics. I want to sing this!

Cheers,
Michael

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: Strupag
Date: 30 Jan 03 - 07:30 PM

Robin Hall and Jimmie definately did it and I can remember the chorus a wee bit different to your's Cranky

"There is a monster in Loch Ness, A fact ye cannie hide,
It's got mair curves than a movie star,
An a wiggle three miles wide
An a wiggle three miles wide"

Iv'e just found their Scottish Choice album and it's not on that!
The search continues

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: michaelr
Date: 30 Jan 03 - 10:38 PM

This site lists 17 MacGregor/Hall records, and it's not on any of them.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: michaelr
Date: 30 Jan 03 - 10:58 PM

This page shows what appears to be a 1960 Decca single, with "Monster" as the B side of "Sinner Man".

No lyrics in sight, though...

I learned something interesting, though -- these two lads (who I hadn't heard of) were in a band (The Galliards) with Leon Rosselson (who I had).

Cheers,
Michael

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: GUEST,Tam Hamilton
Date: 30 Jan 03 - 11:31 PM

I know that's it's on a Alistair McDonald record and also a Tommy Scott CD called Hail Caledonia.
Unfortunealy no Lyrics on either of them.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: michaelr
Date: 02 Feb 03 - 02:32 PM

refresh -- cam on ye Scots!

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: Jim McLean
Date: 02 Feb 03 - 05:02 PM

I'm afraid you'll have to trawl through McGregor and Hall files to find it. I'm afraid I haven't the stomach.
Sorry,
Jim Mclean

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: michaelr
Date: 02 Feb 03 - 08:25 PM

Where would these files be located, Jim?

Michael

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: Jim McLean
Date: 03 Feb 03 - 12:03 PM

Michael, give Decca a ring or whoever handles their catalogue. If you're stuck send me an email [e-mail] or post me a PM and I'll give you some 'phone numbers of singers already mentioned.
Jim

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 06 Jan 12 - 11:35 AM

I think the song you're looking for might be NESSIE (THE LOCH NESS MONSTER). There's a recording by that name on Stuart Anderson's album "Acts Naturally" (1995). Authorship is credited to "Garden."

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 13 Sep 12 - 05:18 PM

There is a monster in Loch Ness
A fact ye cannie hide
It`s got mair curves than a click box star
An a wiggle three miles wide.

####################################

I remember a song, by Robin Hall and Jimmy Macgregor, called Nessie the Loch Ness Monster, I think, I can't remember the words, but the chorus went:
There is a monster in Loch Ness,
The fact ye canny hide,
She's got more curves than a movie star,
and a wiggle three miles wide

Both from the www.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: GUEST
Date: 18 Sep 12 - 06:04 PM

I learned this song years ago and am now looking for the words to teach the kids. I remember the words "but one wee wiley sassenach believed the thing was true and knew if he could prove it he'd be worth a bob or two. Then maybe something about up he came from London ..... and the chorus was Oh there is a monster in Loch Ness, a fact ye canny hide, she's got more curves than Racquel Welch and a wiggle three miles wide. Would love to get the rest of the song, but searching to no avail.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: GUEST,999
Date: 18 Sep 12 - 06:30 PM

The song title is

The Monster of Loch Ness [not 'in' Loch Ness]. It was recorded in 1961 on Decca Records (in England): DR 27771.

Writing was credited to McWharg and MacGregor.

Sung by Robin Hall and Jimmie MacGregor.

You can view the 45 rpm at

http://www.45cat.com/record/f11340

Click on the 45 and it will enlarge so you may read what's on the label.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: GUEST,Allen Murray
Date: 24 May 16 - 05:15 AM

It was done by the Joe Gordon folk four. 1955 or thereabouts

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: eftifino
Date: 25 May 16 - 03:42 AM

It's on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sq-T-3aTWs

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: Megan L
Date: 25 May 16 - 07:42 AM

Eftifinos link

If you belong to london town
and read the daily press
You'll be convinced by this time there's nae monster in Loch Ness

The cockneys laugh and say cor it dont arf make yer think
these great big hairy highland men get far to much to drink

CHORUS
There is a monster in loch ness the fact ye canny hide
she's got mair curves than a movie star and a wiggle three miles wide, and a wiggle three miles wide.

but one wee wily sachennach believed the thing was true
and he knew if he could prove it he could make a bob or two
so he travelled to the country where the beer and the whisky flows
and the wee wild haggis dances while the bonny bagpipe blows.

he met a man in tartan trews and said pray tell me sir
have you ever met this thingumyjig that's causing all the stir
a thingumyjig he answered I think ive hear enough
Our nessies Scotland's pin up and a gran wee bit of stuff.

Chorus

at last he met the beastie that he had come to see
she said yer welcome laddie wid ye like tae stay fur tea
I rarely dine with monsters but I don't mind if I do
Pray what is on the menu and Nessie answered ...........................you

chorus

the yanks arrived from Hollywood tae make the beast a star
and they offered her a contract and a monster Yankee car
but the lights and noise and cameras made poor auld Nessie groan
awa and boil yer can she cried I want tae be alone

chorus

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: GUEST,#
Date: 27 Mar 21 - 07:52 PM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sq-T-3aTWs

Sung there by Robin Hall & Jimmie MacGregor - The Monster Of Loch Ness - 1961 45rpm

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: There is a Monster in Loch Ness...
From: leeneia
Date: 27 Mar 21 - 11:55 PM

Thank you, Meghan and #. That's very clever.