Lyr Add: In These Old Lavender Trousers

Subject: Lyr Add: Lavender Trousers Music Hall Song
From: *#1 PEASANT*
Date: 24 Feb 03 - 11:36 AM

LAVENDER TROUSERS

I know what you're looking at me for,
What you've got your eyes on I can tell.
You're all looking at me lavender trousers;
You all wish you had a pair as well.
My grandfather gave 'em to me so I would look a toff.
Since that day till the day I die,
I swore I'd never take 'em off.
Oh, in these old lavender trousers
I've often skipped and skittered;
I've drunk brown ale and I've drunk champagne
And I've twice been vaccinated.
I've been up the pole, down the drain;
I won the heart of Mary Jane,
Yes, I won the heart of Mary Jane
In these old lavender trousers.
La-di-dah, la-di-dah, la-di-da-di-da-di-doh.

One fine day I walked into Lipton's;
Didn't have a penny or a bean,
Crept behind the counter,
I thought I was not seen,
And it's down me legs, well, I stuffed some eggs
And a pound of margarine.
Oh, in these old lavender trousers,
My state was simply shocking,
'Cos the margarine, well, it was turning green,
And it was running down my stocking.
Then the manager he sent for the boys in blue,
'Cos ten little chicks went cock-a-doodle-doo,
Yes, ten little chicks went cock-a-doodle-doo
In these old lavender trousers.

One fine day I took a trip to Blackpool;
Didn't have a case nor a portmanteau,
Stuffed all the things down the back of me trousers;
I was a travelling portmanteau.
When we got to the station, well, me wife she had a brain;
Said, 'Now look you, Hughie, don't you pay for Sammy.
Just a-smuggle him on the train.'
So in these old lavender trousers
I stuffed our little Sammy.
I walked right through, only paid for two,
That's meself and his dear mammy,
And then when the guard he came around,
He got me pinched and fined a pound,
'Cos he stuck his nose through a hole he'd found
In these old lavender trousers.
-recorded by the late Ron Spicer (Son of George Spicer) on a
cassette entitled "Following My Dear Old Dad"

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: In These Old Lavender Trousers
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 02 Feb 11 - 02:15 PM

The University of Oxford and the British Library have the sheet music, described thus:

IN THESE OLD LAVENDER TROUSERS
Words and music by R. P. Weston and Harry Bedford
Sung by Harry Bedford
Published in London by Francis, Day & Hunter, © 1912.

First line: I know what you're looking at, people.

First line of chorus: In these old lavender trousers.

Subject: Lyr Add: IN THESE OLD LAVENDER TROUSERS (H Bedford
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 06 Feb 11 - 03:58 PM

Lyrics copied from a blog:


IN THESE OLD LAVENDER TROUSERS
Words and music by R. P. Weston and Harry Bedford, 1912.

1. I know what you're looking at, people. What you've got your eyes on I can tell.
It's these dear old lavender trousers, wishing you'd a pair like them as well.
My granddad left them to me so I could look a toff,
And I said till I was dead, I would never take them off.

CHORUS: In these old lavender trousers I've skipped and jumped and skated,
Laughed and wept, worked and slept, and twice been vaccinated.
I've drunk four ale, I've drunk champagne, been up the pole and down a drain.
I won the heart of Mary Jane in these old lavender trousers!

2. Late last night I toddled in Lipton's. Everybody yelled, "Here's someone big!
Who's that in those lavender trousers? Henery the eighth or Lipton's pig?"
I ran round the counter quick, and when I wasn't seen,
Down my legs I stowed some eggs, and a roll of margarine,

CHORUS: In these old lavender trousers. But soon I did feel shocking!
I turned green. The margarine was running down my stocking.
Lipton called a man in blue, then all the eggs were hatching too.
All the little chicks went, "Cock-a-doodle-doo!" in these old lavender trousers.

3. Once when I was staying in Brighton, mashing all the girls on the prom, what-what!
Dazzling them with my lavender trousers, suddenly the girls yelled out, "Great Scott!"
Some old chap was running round wrapped up in wet seaweed,
Shouting, "Dogs, they've pinched my togs!" so like a friend in need,

CHORUS: In these old lavender trousers, said I, "There's room for two, sir!
Though you're fat, and I'm like that, I'm sure there's room for you, sir!"
And all the girls began to screech, for he and I had one leg each,
And arm in arm we toddled up the beach in these old lavender trousers.

4. Last year we had a week in Blackpool, hadn't got a trunk or a bag, and so
Packed the things in the back of my trousers. I was a walking portmanteau.
When we reached the station, Oh! My missus, what a brain!
Said, "don't pay for the kid, you jay! Smuggle him into the train."

CHORUS: In these old lavender trousers, I pushed our little Sammy,
Walked right thro', and paid for two: me and his dear mammy.
But that kid, when the guard came round, got me pinched and fined a pound,
'Cos he poked his head thro' a hole that he had found in these old lavender trousers.

5. Once I was a tragedy actor—thirty bob a week, and a real big star!
When the limelight shone on these trousers, ladies in the stalls would faint—ah, ah!
In the drama "Dirty Dick" I fairly froze their blood,
Till the lords up in the "gawds" started throwing lumps of mud.

CHORUS: In these old lavender trousers, to act I wasn't willin'.
They kicked me on and the limelight shone, and the heroine said, "Vill'in!
Have you no heart for a woman's woe? No tender feeling at all? No, no!"
Then I rubbed my patch and I said, "What oh!" in these old lavender trousers.


YouTube has two recordings—not by the original artist, unfortunately—here and here.