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Which songs would YOU ban?

Dave the Gnome 25 Mar 03 - 04:38 PM
DougR 25 Mar 03 - 04:50 PM
InOBU 25 Mar 03 - 05:16 PM
Beccy 25 Mar 03 - 05:21 PM
Rick Fielding 25 Mar 03 - 05:46 PM
Bill D 25 Mar 03 - 05:56 PM
catspaw49 25 Mar 03 - 06:02 PM
greg stephens 25 Mar 03 - 06:19 PM
Rick Fielding 25 Mar 03 - 06:33 PM
Tweed 25 Mar 03 - 07:14 PM
Sam L 25 Mar 03 - 07:27 PM
Gareth 25 Mar 03 - 07:40 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 25 Mar 03 - 08:50 PM
Thomas the Rhymer 25 Mar 03 - 08:59 PM
Callie 25 Mar 03 - 09:29 PM
mack/misophist 25 Mar 03 - 10:04 PM
Sam L 25 Mar 03 - 11:25 PM
Rustic Rebel 25 Mar 03 - 11:41 PM
mg 26 Mar 03 - 02:42 AM
Dave the Gnome 26 Mar 03 - 04:48 AM
GUEST,banished 26 Mar 03 - 05:21 AM
Catarina 26 Mar 03 - 07:12 AM
Dave Bryant 26 Mar 03 - 07:49 AM
Coyote Breath 26 Mar 03 - 08:48 AM
GUEST,Guesty 26 Mar 03 - 08:49 AM
artbrooks 26 Mar 03 - 09:15 AM
JennyO 26 Mar 03 - 09:34 AM
Little Hawk 26 Mar 03 - 09:48 AM
outfidel 26 Mar 03 - 10:50 AM
Rick Fielding 26 Mar 03 - 11:19 AM
harvey andrews 26 Mar 03 - 01:29 PM
Bill D 26 Mar 03 - 02:05 PM
Big Mick 26 Mar 03 - 02:16 PM
Jeri 26 Mar 03 - 02:49 PM
Big Mick 26 Mar 03 - 03:18 PM
Jeri 26 Mar 03 - 03:42 PM
Rick Fielding 26 Mar 03 - 03:51 PM
Peter T. 26 Mar 03 - 04:37 PM
Tinker 26 Mar 03 - 04:59 PM
Jeri 26 Mar 03 - 05:31 PM
Kim C 26 Mar 03 - 05:41 PM
Little Hawk 26 Mar 03 - 06:06 PM
GUEST,Guesty 26 Mar 03 - 06:43 PM
Hrothgar 27 Mar 03 - 04:59 AM
Alasdair 27 Mar 03 - 05:19 AM
Bullfrog Jones 27 Mar 03 - 06:21 AM
Alasdair 27 Mar 03 - 07:51 AM
Little Hawk 27 Mar 03 - 08:11 AM
TIA 27 Mar 03 - 08:13 AM
GUEST,Redhorse at work 27 Mar 03 - 08:21 AM
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Subject: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 04:38 PM

A whole silly debate was going on BBC radio 2 today about whether certain songs should be banned from the playlists during the current crisis. Anti-war songs were mentioned of course and ones that would it be insensitive to play at certain times. The silliest one mentioned was 'Billy don't be a hero' by Paper Lace. I would ban it outright myself, but not because of the war...

So, come on, get your thinking caps on. Can anyone come up with a dafter song to ban? And Why?

Cheers

Dave the Gnome


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: DougR
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 04:50 PM

Dave: I don't think ANY song should be banned.

DougR


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: InOBU
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 05:16 PM

I would ban all my songs so everyone whould hear them. Larry


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Beccy
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 05:21 PM

Which songs would I ban? None- that is ridiculous. If people don't want to hear it they can change the station.

Beccy


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 05:46 PM

Hi Dave.

BAN? Only on the basis of taste, and certainly NOT on political content.

Feelings
You Light up my life
A current country flag waver that rhymes "Forgotten" with "Bin Lauden"
About five of mine that I wish had never got recorded.

Cheers

Rick


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Bill D
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 05:56 PM

"ban" a song?..Ask King Canute about related tasks...


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: catspaw49
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 06:02 PM

Hell, I thought Yuban was brand of coffee.............

Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: greg stephens
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 06:19 PM

Lonnis Donegan's "Nobody loves like an Irishman" was banned by the BBC because of a humorous reference to the Koran, and I believe still is.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 06:33 PM

Greg, if I'd been (the late) Lonnie, I'd have BEGGED them to ban it! And quick!

He's not a song, but I'd ban Catspaw.

Oh.....and "A Daisy a Day".

Gettin' sillified...time to clean the basement, or make dinner or anything!

Rick


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Tweed
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 07:14 PM

Az a honorary Grand Duke of the Kingdom of Mississippi, I hab petitioned hiz Highness Kingkhandu to ban "Stairway to Hebben" from the Royal playlists. I hab it on good authority that this song waz the beginning ob de downfall of decent variegated radio programming. Song banning iz never a gud or pretty thing but "Stairway" iz a special case and needs to be done. If this works purdy good then mebbe we cud get Yes' "Roundabout" off the air fer a while too.

Sh*t....now it's in my head.....gahhhhhh!

"I'll be the roundabout
The words will make you out 'n' out
And change the day your way....."

I can't stand it....
Yerz,
Tweed


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Sam L
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 07:27 PM

Oh, come on can't people take the spirit of this "ban"?

I'd ban any song containing a capital "N" or any reference to spoons, just so we can later plead a national insanity defense.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Gareth
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 07:40 PM

Don't ban them - laugh at them.

Gareth


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 08:50 PM

As a resident of the Florida/Alabama Gulf Coast it is my great misfortune to have to perpetually deal with the fans of another Gulf Coast resident, Mr. Jimmy Buffett of Gulf Shores, Alabama. Don't get me wrong. I like Jimmy Buffett. I like Buffett's songs when Buffett does them. I don't like them when anybody else does them. I don't like it when people ask me to do them. And I sure don't like it when some drunk Spring-breaker at an Irish pub where an Irish session is going on keeps hollering about how much she wants to hear some Buffett.

I think that Jimmy Buffett covers should be banned from all beach bars east of the Rockies. And if it hurts the pocketbooks of some giggers for whom Buffett songs comprise half of their repertoire, so what? Let 'em learn some John Prine instead.

Bruce


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Thomas the Rhymer
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 08:59 PM

Fred, you just made me day... ;^)

Lets ban all songs that do not encourage mindless and immediate procreative behavior between strangers... Lets ban all songs that make any refference to injustice... But most of all, let's be sure to ban artistic expression of any kind... Bigdaddywarbucks needs your support! ttr


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Callie
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 09:29 PM

I'd ban the "music" of Kenny G


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: mack/misophist
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 10:04 PM

If some one twisted my arm and threatened to hurt me if I didn't ban something, I might see my way clear to banning rap, and disco, of course.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Sam L
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 11:25 PM

Hey there, TTR, g'day.

BWL that's not a bad idea either. Nothing against Jimmy Buffet, I LIKE Jimmy Buffet, I'm just tired of Jimmy Buffet. I was born that way. Prine ain't a bad alternative.

I've been working on a cover of Freebird, for requests. It's just the diddle-diddle lick for a half hour, while I sing Lord help me I can't chaaaaange... over and over. It's kinda HARD. Maybe you could do a cover of Margaritaville--I'd focus on the "Elvis" spot where it stops... and then starts agin'. Maybe you could just do the part where it stops....


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 25 Mar 03 - 11:41 PM

Well you can take "Proud Mary", float it on down the river, until it sinks to the bottom, and a fish eats it. The fish is later caught, and eaten, in return is shit out down the pipes, comes out into some river and, well... it's rollin' down the river again! What a damn vicious cycle. Just can't seem to get rid of that song!


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: mg
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 02:42 AM

Barrett's Privateers.. mg


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 04:48 AM

I'd ban all people from taking silly questions seriously...

But aside from that I love Freds idea as well. Kind of smacks of John Milton, or was it Milton John, censoring every vowel. 0r was it every consonant? (Do I remember my Catch 22 properly?)

I think I'd also ban Bolivian unicyclists from public parks and make sure that Captain Sensibles version of Happy Talk was played at every opportunity during football matches;-)

Cheers

DtG


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: GUEST,banished
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 05:21 AM

"I'd ban all people from taking silly questions seriously..."
I understand how you feel Dave, some of these people? have terminal righteousitis. Incurable.

oh yes "polka dot bikini" by Timmy Mallett.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Catarina
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 07:12 AM

I still remember when LOTS of songs were banned from portuguese radio. It was even forbiden to buy the records. We had some banned recordings at home, and used to listen to them at night, with volume on the minimum so no neighbours might listen. My parents had great difficulty in convincing my younger brother, who was six or seven by then, the he coul NOT sing "Bandiera Rossa" during school chorus classes, even if it was his favourite song...
When I was twelve I went, with my Dad, to a concert where most singers were only allowed to sing one or two "harmless" songs- all other singing was forbiden. Of course, one of those harmless songs, that could safely be played on the radio, became the sign for the beginning of the military uprise on April 25th, 1974...
It is silly to ban songs from public playing, isn't it?


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 07:49 AM

I believe that the first record to be banned by BBC Radio was Tom Lehrer's Masochism Tango/Poisoning Pigeons in the Park.

I've also heard that Leon Rosselson's Little Tim Maguire was banned because it might encourage arsonists.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 08:48 AM

Ban Burl Ives' "Pearly Sands"

CB


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: GUEST,Guesty
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 08:49 AM

Isn't this really music, despite the BS prefix?

I believe in the if you don't like it, don't listen theory, but there are a number of songs that are self banned, earning a fast station change. I can't name them, because I don't listen long enough to know what they are. Most rap, sappy country, self-important singer songwriters, more not worth the trouble to name.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: artbrooks
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 09:15 AM

I think I'd ban "Tiny Bubbles." Never have liked that song...and don't care much for champagne either.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: JennyO
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 09:34 AM

Achy breaky heart

Ruby (don't take your love to town)

Some days are diamonds


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 09:48 AM

I'm not in favour of legally banning any song, but there are numerous ones I'd be delighted never to hear again, needless to say...

Like... "Morning Train", "My Way", and "Having My Baby"!

As for "Billy, Don't Be A Hero", that song is enough to make any intelligent peace activist fall down on his knees and puke. It is probably among the ten worst written songs of all time. It's downright embarrassing.

Fortunately, I don't hear these songs too often, except in malls and retail stores, cos I don't listen to the F**king radio!!! (It's just a vehicle for bombarding people with inane advertising.)

- LH


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: outfidel
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 10:50 AM

If I were declared Maximum Programmer for life, I would immediately ban from the radio:

everything by Michael Bolton, Celine Dion, and Kenny G
"Feelings" by Morris Albert
every version of "MacArthur Park"
anyone who calls themselves "shock jocks"
everything by Billy Joel, Huey Lewis, and Phil Collins
"We Are the World" (great cause, horrible song)
everything by Journey, Survivor, Foreigner, Toto, Styx & REO Speedwagon
"Say Say Say" by Paul McCartney & Michael Jackson
"Ebony & Ivory" by Paul McCartney & Stevie Wonder
"Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time" by Paul McCartney
everything by Barry Manilow, Lionel Richie, Bobby Goldsboro, Air Supply
the entire "adult contemporary/soft rock" genre


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 11:19 AM

Gee...this is pretty good. NONE of us, left, right, or centre, would ban songs for their political content....only cuz they make us ill. That's progress.

Add "You're Having My Baby" to my list....oh and I wouldn't BAN Paul Anka (my countryman) I'd definitely have him fried in Texas for writing that song.

Rick


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: harvey andrews
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 01:29 PM

Anything by Elton John in that dreadful fake accent.
oh and "My boy lollipop"


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Bill D
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 02:05 PM

well, there are very few songs I'd consider 'banning'....but there are a few you'd better not sing near me more than once a year.

"Waltzing With Bears"
"Lovely Agnes"
and "I Wish I Had Someone to Love Me"...which I cannot hear without imagining it done on a Calliope, or by a German Brass Band


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Big Mick
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 02:16 PM

no song should be banned...........EXCEPT......
THE UNICORN

Mick


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Jeri
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 02:49 PM

I drove all night, lollipop, lollipop
Trying to forget my feelings of you
Though there's something in the air tonight
It's melting in the rain
And I'm wa-wa-wa-waltzing to the bad song blues

Ruby, don't take your love to town,
Just take it on the run.
What a lovely way to say how much you love me
And you know we've only just begun

There's a madman across the water
I know you've got a friend in Ben
But you're rollin on a river of tiny bubbles
And I'm wa-wa-wa-waltzing to the bad song blues again


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Big Mick
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 03:18 PM

MEMO

TO:      MSGT. MUDELF CORLEW

FROM:    PETTY OFFICER THIRD CLASS MUDELF LANE

SUBJECT:    YOUR VIOLATION OF THE UNIFORM CODE OF MUDCAT POSTING

------------------------------------------------------------------

Sarge, I know you are wise in all things and that I risk extra duty in posting this, but your continued and flagrant violation of the "warn posters to swallow all liquids and food before reading this post" rule is causing me a great deal of anguish. In addition to it causing me to have to expend a great deal of elbow grease, you know that I am a left wing labor organizer and don't like to support the capitalist tyrants that seek to enslave us all. Yet since I have begun reading your posts, the stock value of Acme Screen Cleaner has risen dramatically. If you do not cease failing to post the appropriate disclaimer, I will be forced to take this issue to Rear End Admiral and General Joe Offer for resolution. This could very well result in you being brought up on charges. And I will administer the punishment personally, with a spud, of course.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Jeri
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 03:42 PM

Spanking? :-T


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Rick Fielding
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 03:51 PM

I FRIGGIN' KNEW IT!!!

More SPEWING, more projectile crying, more fluids on keyboards!

Jesus Keerist Michael! Will you get a hold of yourself!! Whoops......NO....No.....I didn't really MEAN that!

Oh lord, I need a new hobby!

Jeri.....that's brilliant, although my keyboard is still completely dry.

Moi


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Peter T.
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 04:37 PM

Neil Diamond songs. There has been much discussion of the Geneva Conventions (weren't they a 60s band?), and these records violate them. yours, Peter T.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Tinker
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 04:59 PM

Jeri, I bow before thee....

Note to self: tell investment banker husband to investigate Acme Screen Cleaner....


Tinker


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Jeri
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 05:31 PM

Well, Peter got a whole category with Neil Diamond!
Now, maybe we should figure out who would have made up the supergroup most suited to play the Titanic. Maybe not.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Kim C
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 05:41 PM

When I was in the first grade my big brother, whom I still adore to this day in spite of his foibles, took me down to the record shop and bought me the 45 of Billy Don't Be a Hero. I believe The Night Chicago Died was on the other side. That's been a long time ago, though. And while the song is goofy, I have fond memories of my brother taking me to the record shop.

My picks, though: Telephone Man and Brand New Key.


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Subject: RE: BS: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 06:06 PM

Yeah, Paper Lace had a genius for recording unbelievably bad and unintentionally ridiculous songs about oddball subjects...

What could they have been thinking of?

Even Barry Sadler was subtle in comparison...


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: GUEST,Guesty
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 06:43 PM

Thanks to whoever moved this thread where it belongs. It isn't an essential thread, but a fun one. More people should see it here, once the original posters find it again. By now they should know the drill.


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Hrothgar
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 04:59 AM

Doesn't Leonard Cohen deserve a jersey here?


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Alasdair
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 05:19 AM

I would ban the following because of their intrinsic annoyingness, nothing to do with the war:

Annie's Song
Summer of 69
Everything I do (Bryan Adams strikes again)
will Young's cover of Come on Baby Light my Fire
Britney's cover of I Love Rock'n'Roll
Sospan Fach, but only the "who beat the wallabies" verse

All this "to each his own" is well enuff but these songs make me boil

Al


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Bullfrog Jones
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 06:21 AM

Maybe this is the answer --- the troops set up enormous sound systems outside Baghdad and play these songs till Saddam Hussein comes out begging for mercy. Of course they might be banned under the Geneva Convention as Weapons of Musical Distress!

BJ


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Alasdair
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 07:51 AM

I would also like to ban the lyrics "fol-de-rol", "derry-dum-do" and similar. Surely we can do this better than this.


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: Little Hawk
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 08:11 AM

Bullfrog - I think your plan would have the reverse effect, and break the moral of the coalition forces! Why? Because they mostly speak English, and really terrible songs are far less annoying when they're in a language foreign to the listener, so the Iraquis (many of them) would be relatively immune to the crap. Example: I can happily listen to dreadful French love songs on the radio, cos I don't know what they're saying, and the music is passable or even good!

As I am utterly opposed to the invasion of Iraq, therefore, I am in favour of putting your plan into effect at once, and driving the Americans and British out of their flippin' minds with those dreadful songs! Ha! Ha! Let's do it!

- LH


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: TIA
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 08:13 AM

Kenny Roger's Lady. Far worse even than Ruby. Oh, and what's that one of his with "...the Gatlin boys came callin', and there wuz three of them..." (last bit spoken in ominous tones).


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Subject: RE: Which songs would YOU ban?
From: GUEST,Redhorse at work
Date: 27 Mar 03 - 08:21 AM

Tom Lehrer "Masochism Tango" wasn't the first BBC Radio ban: Frank Crumit's "The Pig Got Up and Slowly Walked Away" was banned in the thirties according to my mother; I also believe several of George Formby's songs for fairly obvious reasons.


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