Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies

Subject: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: Haruo
Date: 02 Apr 03 - 09:01 PM

My fiancée and I were doing "Blest be the tie that binds" and various parodic offprints while waiting for a bus today (On mules we find two legs behind; I wish that my room had a floor; The frog he am a queer bird...) and I was quite surprised just now to find that there doesn't appear to be a "Blest be the tie that binds" in the DT, nor does a search turn up any threads on it.

So, let's get with it, eh?

Haruo

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: wysiwyg
Date: 02 Apr 03 - 09:18 PM

Blest be the sty I find
In either eye to be
For neither a mote nor a beam would I have
And the sty it will still let me see.

~S~

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: GUEST,Nancy King at work
Date: 03 Apr 03 - 05:24 PM

I once heard one that started

Blest be the tie that binds
My collar to my shirt...

It was pretty cute, as I recall, but unfortunately I don't remember any more of it.

Cheers, Nancy

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: Joe_F
Date: 03 Apr 03 - 07:44 PM

I'm wasting no dollars
In buying new collars
To hide that ring of dirt.

. . .

This college grows better each day.
The seniors will soon go away.
We'll meet them in Hades,
A-necking the ladies,
And there'll be the devil to pay.

From _The New Song Fest_. The nine stanzas I have omitted include several that have independent existence as limericks, and it strikes me that most limericks could be sung to that tune. For example,

From the crypt of the church at St Giles
Came shrieks that resounded for miles.
Said the priest "Goodness gracious,
Dear Brother Ignatius
Forgets that the bishop has piles!"

Or that great rarity, an actually pious limerick:

God's plan made a hopeful beginning,
But man spoiled his chances by sinning.
We hope that the story
Will end it God's glory,
But at present the other side's winning.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: Haruo
Date: 04 Apr 03 - 04:29 AM

I don't know why I wrote "On mules we find..." in the intro. That's an "Auld Lang Syne" ("Miller's Daughter") text, not "Dennis" (Dennis being the tune name of the "Blest be the tie" tune).

The others we sang were

I wish that my room had a floor—
I don't care so much for a door—
But this walking around
Without touching the ground
Is getting to be quite a bore!

and

The frog he am a queer bird,
He ain't got no tail almost hardly.
When he walk, he yump;
When he yump, he sit down,
Where he ain't got no tail almost hardly.

and of course the tie/collar one given above.

More would be welcome.

Haruo

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: KateG
Date: 04 Apr 03 - 08:16 AM

A tune that works with limericks! I'll have to dig out my old copy of Song Fest and learn it.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: raredance
Date: 04 Apr 03 - 11:24 PM

I went up to see Mrs. Brown
She didn't have on any gown
I told her to slip on just any old thing
So she slipped on the stairs and came down.


rich r

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: raredance
Date: 04 Apr 03 - 11:58 PM

The froggy one is in the DT

The Froggy He


Blest be the tie that binds
My collar to my shirt
For underneath its silken folds
Is half an inch of dirt

Blest be the tie that binds
My collar to my shirt
It make me look tidy
It covers my nightie
It also covers the dirt

I know that my face is no star
I know I'm not lovely by far
But then I don't mind it
Because I'm behind it
It's them that's out front gets the jar

I'd rather have eyes than a nose
I'd rather have fingers than toes
And as for my hair
I'm glad it is there
I'll be sorry when all of it goes

Blest be the tie that binds
My collar to my shirt
And cates the gravy
From my vest
And saves it for dessert.



rich r

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: raredance
Date: 05 Apr 03 - 12:10 AM

The Pie Dream

"I'm hungry," she said with a sigh
"I'm so hungry I feel I shall die
They don't realize
That a girl of my size
Requires a great deal of pie.

"What's that?" she heard someone demand
She never could quite understand
Stare hard as she could
Before her there stood
A Prince with a pie in his hand

He promised if she'd be his wife
She could eat custard pie with a knife
She could help herself twice
To everything nice
And do nothing but eat all her life

So they rode 'til they came to a gate
With a legend upon a brass plate
"You should not put away
What you might eat today."
So she ate and she ate and she ate.

She ate 'til she grew like a ball
Her eyes they grew dreadfully small
She grew out of her clothes
And as for her nose
She didn't have any at all

They set out on a wondrous plight
And arrived at her home after night
And her father said, "Ben,
There's a pig out again"
And she woke with a terrible fright


rich r

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: GUEST,celtaddict
Date: 05 Apr 03 - 01:58 AM

The Limerick's furtive and mean.
You must hold it in strict quarantine,
Or it sneaks to the slums
Where it promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk, and obscene.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: Joe Offer
Date: 05 Apr 03 - 04:00 PM

Rich R - where did you get those versions? They're great, but I have this thing about attributing sources...

Subject: Lyr Add: Blest be the tie that binds
From: Haruo
Date: 06 Apr 03 - 03:20 AM

Since at least the first stanza of the original is naturalized in the hymnody of English-singing Christians, we'd probably better have the text of the hymn in the database, too. (And Kate G., no need to go to Song Fest to learn the tune; click on the Cyber Hymnal link for a MIDI rendition. It is after all a hymn tune, albeit one that, owing to its perfect adaptability to the limerick, is hard to sing, I find, without snickering.)

---

Blest Be the Tie That Binds (Cyber Hymnal link)
Text: John Fawcett, 1782
Tune: DENNIS (Hans Nägeli, arr. by Lowell Mason, 1845)

Blest be the tie that binds
Our hearts in Christian love;
The fellowship of kindred minds
Is like that to that above.

Before our Father's throne
We pour our ardent prayers;
Our fears, our hopes, our aims are one
Our comforts and our cares.

We share each other's woes,
Our mutual burdens bear;
And often for each other flows
The sympathizing tear.

When we asunder part,
It gives us inward pain;
But we shall still be joined in heart,
And hope to meet again.

This glorious hope revives
Our courage by the way;
While each in expectation lives,
And longs to see the day.

From sorrow, toil and pain,
And sin, we shall be free,
And perfect love and friendship reign
Through all eternity.

---

Haruo

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: GUEST,ruckerrocker
Date: 03 Mar 17 - 10:52 PM

The New Song Fest, 300 SONGS-WORDS and MUSIC, Edited by Dick and Beth Best, Intercollegiate Outing Club Association contains a parody of Blest be the Tie that Binds that includes the "collar to the shirt" verse, as well as ten others.

Subject: RE: Lyr Req: Blest be the tie parodies
From: GUEST,the hills of West Virginia!
Date: 07 May 17 - 11:36 PM

I know just how ugly I are
I know that my face is no star
But still I don't mind it
Because I'm behind it
The one in the front gets the jar!