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BS: The Mother of all BS threads

Little Hawk 25 May 10 - 12:29 AM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 12:30 AM
Amos 25 May 10 - 09:37 AM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 11:03 AM
Little Hawk 25 May 10 - 11:32 AM
Amos 25 May 10 - 12:03 PM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 12:17 PM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 12:20 PM
MMario 25 May 10 - 12:45 PM
Amos 25 May 10 - 12:56 PM
Acme 25 May 10 - 01:05 PM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 01:06 PM
Amos 25 May 10 - 06:21 PM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 06:59 PM
Amos 25 May 10 - 10:25 PM
Rapparee 25 May 10 - 10:40 PM
Amos 25 May 10 - 11:15 PM
Amos 26 May 10 - 10:47 AM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 12:00 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 12:13 PM
Amos 26 May 10 - 12:51 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 12:54 PM
Eiseley 26 May 10 - 03:09 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 03:46 PM
MMario 26 May 10 - 03:53 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 06:43 PM
Amos 26 May 10 - 07:26 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 07:38 PM
Amos 26 May 10 - 08:38 PM
Janie 26 May 10 - 08:51 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 09:47 PM
Janie 26 May 10 - 10:19 PM
Rapparee 26 May 10 - 10:36 PM
Janie 26 May 10 - 11:07 PM
Amos 26 May 10 - 11:23 PM
Acme 26 May 10 - 11:30 PM
Janie 26 May 10 - 11:54 PM
Amos 27 May 10 - 12:06 AM
Eiseley 27 May 10 - 12:28 AM
Rapparee 27 May 10 - 01:47 AM
MMario 27 May 10 - 08:41 AM
Amos 27 May 10 - 10:17 AM
MMario 27 May 10 - 10:46 AM
Rapparee 27 May 10 - 10:55 AM
Acme 27 May 10 - 11:30 AM
MMario 27 May 10 - 11:39 AM
Rapparee 27 May 10 - 11:48 AM
MMario 27 May 10 - 11:48 AM
Janie 27 May 10 - 12:16 PM
MMario 27 May 10 - 12:48 PM
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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:29 AM

Do you have to act German to Rolf?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:30 AM

But how does it explain my love of bayoneting people while I play the Scottish pipes? It's like my favorite song:

Take the town and kill the people
Rape and pillage, loot and burn,
Be very careful how you do things,
Be sure to do them each in turn.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 10 - 09:37 AM

Gliding like a fallen leaf,
Mom sinks toward the bottom.
Quick! Hit "Submit".


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 11:03 AM

Amos, I urge you to seek psychiatric help quickly if not sooner. Forcing Mom to "submit" to your libidinous urges indicates a deep-seated and quite ugly defect in your character. Herr Doktor Liebenscheiss could perhaps have helped you were he not currently undergoing therapy himself at the NYCFTTS. Please, seek help -- if not for your own sake, do it for Mom.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Little Hawk
Date: 25 May 10 - 11:32 AM

(chuckle)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:03 PM

Rapaire:

Your endless well of talent in the fine art of twisting and distorting reality never ceases to impress me. It is a pity, really, that such a skill has no redeeming soicial value.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:17 PM

Amos, Amos, Amos.... I have a degree in English Literature. We were trained to see in writings that which is hidden from others who are less enlightened. For example,

Little Bo-peep has lost her sheep
And doesn't know where to find them.
Leave them alone and they'll come home,
Wagging their tails behind them.


No one can deny that this is, on the surface, a simple children's rhyme. Dig deeper and you will find a tale of a young lass who was betrayed by a callous lover (probably of the Upper Classes) and is now pregnant; unless she interferes with the pregnancy her "sin" will "come home" (vide passim. "chickens come home to roost" et al.) and happily (for the child or children will know nothing of their mother's "sin") coo in the cradle.

ALL writing, all communication, contains deeper levels than appear on the surface, even this one.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:20 PM

As for "redeeming social value" it keeps quite a few people employed in colleges and universities instead of having them hang out in low dives* and rob convenience stores.




*Some do this anyway.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:45 PM

He could be a politician. That seems to be a necessary talent for them.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 10 - 12:56 PM

IT's a pity you don't have a viable theology to throw into the malarkey stew which you are peddling. You could outstrip the POpe.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 25 May 10 - 01:05 PM

MOM! No explaining needed! I spend a lot more time outside than inside, is all. The sun sometimes makes your brain a little dizzy. I can barely keep up with all of these retirees who need to go get a job! Another one!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 01:06 PM

I do. It can be summarized as: Siddown, shut up, and give me you money or Baby Jesus will pee on you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 10 - 06:21 PM

Humph. That's no theology at all, Rapaire. A cheap, two-bit beaverboard sort of religion, if you ask me, tawdry and steeped in midden.



A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 06:59 PM

Better'n some and good as most....


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 10 - 10:25 PM

Last-Word Mike, defender of the indefensible, Senser of the non-sensical, and knight errant to the Aberrant. Go to!! :D


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 25 May 10 - 10:40 PM

...There was a king reigned in the East:        
There, when kings will sit to feast,              
They get their fill before they think        
With poisoned meat and poisoned drink.        
He gathered all the springs to birth        
From the many-venomed earth;        
First a little, thence to more,              
He sampled all her killing store;        
And easy, smiling, seasoned sound,        
Sate the king when healths went round.        
They put arsenic in his meat        
And stared aghast to watch him eat;              
They poured strychnine in his cup        
And shook to see him drink it up:        
They shook, they stared as white's their shirt:        
Them it was their poison hurt.        
?I tell the tale that I heard told.              
Mithridates, he died old.        


             --A. E. Housman, 1896


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 25 May 10 - 11:15 PM

Oh, bravo. You are redeemed and washed of sin for your donation o f such gems.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 10 - 10:47 AM

It is Wednesday, of Wodin's name,
A day for joy, a day for fame,
A day to dance with style, aplomb,
And gravity, as suits our Mom.
For gravity, when we keep stalling
Drives our sweet Mom to fits of falling.
And that, it is my true confession,
Demands some sort of intercession!
So here from now, to there back when,
Is Mom, now raised up again!


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 12:00 PM

Just for that, Amos, I will post the entire poem. It's well worth it.

Terence, this is stupid stuff
       by A. E. Housman

'TERENCE, this is stupid stuff:        
You eat your victuals fast enough;        
There can't be much amiss, 'tis clear,        
To see the rate you drink your beer.        
But oh, good Lord, the verse you make,              
It gives a chap the belly-ache.        
The cow, the old cow, she is dead;        
It sleeps well, the horned head:        
We poor lads, 'tis our turn now        
To hear such tunes as killed the cow.              
Pretty friendship 'tis to rhyme        
Your friends to death before their time        
Moping melancholy mad:        
Come, pipe a tune to dance to, lad.'        

Why, if 'tis dancing you would be,              
There's brisker pipes than poetry.        
Say, for what were hop-yards meant,        
Or why was Burton built on Trent?        
Oh many a peer of England brews        
Livelier liquor than the Muse,              
And malt does more than Milton can        
To justify God's ways to man.        
Ale, man, ale's the stuff to drink        
For fellows whom it hurts to think:        
Look into the pewter pot              
To see the world as the world's not.        
And faith, 'tis pleasant till 'tis past:        
The mischief is that 'twill not last.        
Oh I have been to Ludlow fair        
And left my necktie God knows where,              
And carried half way home, or near,        
Pints and quarts of Ludlow beer:        
Then the world seemed none so bad,        
And I myself a sterling lad;        
And down in lovely muck I've lain,              
Happy till I woke again.        
Then I saw the morning sky:        
Heigho, the tale was all a lie;        
The world, it was the old world yet,        
I was I, my things were wet,              
And nothing now remained to do        
But begin the game anew.        

Therefore, since the world has still        
Much good, but much less good than ill,        
And while the sun and moon endure              
Luck's a chance, but trouble's sure,        
I'd face it as a wise man would,        
And train for ill and not for good.        
'Tis true, the stuff I bring for sale        
Is not so brisk a brew as ale:              
Out of a stem that scored the hand        
I wrung it in a weary land.        
But take it: if the smack is sour,        
The better for the embittered hour;        
It should do good to heart and head              
When your soul is in my soul's stead;        
And I will friend you, if I may,        
In the dark and cloudy day.        

There was a king reigned in the East:        
There, when kings will sit to feast,              
They get their fill before they think        
With poisoned meat and poisoned drink.        
He gathered all the springs to birth        
From the many-venomed earth;        
First a little, thence to more,              
He sampled all her killing store;        
And easy, smiling, seasoned sound,        
Sate the king when healths went round.        
They put arsenic in his meat        
And stared aghast to watch him eat;              
They poured strychnine in his cup        
And shook to see him drink it up:        
They shook, they stared as white's their shirt:        
Them it was their poison hurt.        
?I tell the tale that I heard told.              
Mithridates, he died old.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 12:13 PM

And just because you've been nice to Mom today, Amos:

Dover Beach
by Matthew Arnold

The sea is calm to-night.
The tide is full, the moon lies fair
Upon the straits; on the French coast the light
Gleams and is gone; the cliffs of England stand;
Glimmering and vast, out in the tranquil bay.
Come to the window, sweet is the night-air!
Only, from the long line of spray
Where the sea meets the moon-blanched land,
Listen! you hear the grating roar
Of pebbles which the waves draw back, and fling,
At their return, up the high strand,
Begin, and cease, and then again begin,
With tremulous cadence slow, and bring
The eternal note of sadness in.

Sophocles long ago
Heard it on the Aegaean, and it brought
Into his mind the turbid ebb and flow
Of human misery; we
Find also in the sound a thought,
Hearing it by this distant northern sea.

The Sea of Faith
Was once, too, at the full, and round earth's shore
Lay like the folds of a bright girdle furled.
But now I only hear
Its melancholy, long, withdrawing roar,
Retreating, to the breath
Of the night-wind, down the vast edges drear
And naked shingles of the world.

Ah, love, let us be true
To one another! for the world, which seems
To lie before us like a land of dreams,
So various, so beautiful, so new,
Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light,
Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain;
And we are here as on a darkling plain
Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight,
Where ignorant armies clash by night.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 10 - 12:51 PM

Matthew Arnold was a sop, to my mind. Not so deep as a well, nor as wide as a church door; but he was enough to serve.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 12:54 PM

I have a book of his criticism and I must agree. I do like some of his poetry, however.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 26 May 10 - 03:09 PM

One memory I cherish is of a late autumn afternoon sitting on the couch in the poetry library in my parents' house and listening to Dad read Sohrab and Rustam aloud to me as I did some sort of needlework.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 03:46 PM

In Persian?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 26 May 10 - 03:53 PM

Persian stitch makes some very nice patterns.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 06:43 PM

I thought it was what the vet used to sew up a cat.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 10 - 07:26 PM

If you can't read Eiseley a poem in Persian, at least send her one by mail...


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 07:38 PM

The last thing she needs is another male in the house! She's living with three guys now!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 10 - 08:38 PM

Yeah but she wouldn't dare misbehave with Eiseley watching.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 10 - 08:51 PM

One memory I cherish is sitting on the porch, listening to Pa recite "May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose."

If I remember correctly, it was that what convinced MOM to marry him.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 09:47 PM

One memory I cherish is sitting by the campfire, the wagons drawn up in a circle and off in the distance a coyote howling, eating s'mores and drinking Coke.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 10 - 10:19 PM

YOu'd a cherished it more if you had a snorted the coke....well, you would a cherished it more if you had snorted the coke if you had remembered it.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 26 May 10 - 10:36 PM

I tried snorting coke once and damned near drowned.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 10 - 11:07 PM

Know what you mean....and those brown buggers that result endear you to no one but Shane.

Sum Yung Sun is off on a two week hiking/kayaking trip with 2 teachers and 12 schoolmates in the Adirondacks. Hope he comes home with his southern accent intact. (Do moose and elk sound like yankees?)


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 26 May 10 - 11:23 PM

No. But there are some Northerners, notably from Brooklyn, Queens, and the Bronx, who sound like mooses and elks when they talk.


A


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 26 May 10 - 11:30 PM

Oh, darn. I lost the train of thought. I'll have to wing it (no way am I as nutz er dedicated as Eiseley to read the entire thing again.

MOM, I mowed the front lawn tonight. It looks so purty!


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 26 May 10 - 11:54 PM

Stream of consciousness....Adirondacks-New York=New Jersey-Moose, Elk, kayaking/canoeing, Gluon, phreds, Theodore B Taylor, The deltoid Pumpkin Seed, roadkill....must catch up on the writings of John McPhee.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 10 - 12:06 AM

When we waltz together, my world's in disguise
A fairyland tale that's come true,
And when you look at me with those stars in your eyes,
I could waltz across Texas with you.

I could waltz across Texas with you in my arms
    Waltz across Texas with you;
    Like a storybook ending I'm lost in your charms
    I could waltz across Texas with you.


My troubles and heartaches are all up and gone
The moment you came into view;
And with your hand in mine I could dance on and on
I could waltz across Texas with you.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Eiseley
Date: 27 May 10 - 12:28 AM

Oh, I can never get enough of John McPhee!
I want to stop the car at every roadcut and examine the strata, I wish I could join the merchant marines and go looking for a ship, the stories of acquiring treasures for art museums intrigue me . . . What an amazing life, to be able to do so many fascinating things and meet so many colorful characters and then write about it all.

Hey, that sounds like exactly what happens HERE! I guess that means I'm "livin the dream!"

By the way, it's not the Persian stitch, but mighty fine anyway!

Eiseley


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 10 - 01:47 AM

You realize that the "h" in his last name is silent? So's the "h" in his first name, for that matter.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 May 10 - 08:41 AM

off in the distance a coyote howling, eating s'mores

If he hadn't been so greedy and waited for the s'mores to cool down a bit he wouldn't have been howling.

I'm going to have to water the garden if it doesn't rain today. Don't want to lose my new plantings.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Amos
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:17 AM

There is no greater betrayal than a Smore which burns your tongue. It is a complete violation of trust.

Is it Algerian??


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:46 AM

@Janie - Moose sound a bit like down easters; and elk usually sound more Canadian.

But since the white tail range moved north both are pretty scarce in the Adirondacks; elk moreso then moose, but both, really.

And the White tail deer has maintained a genteel southern accent thorugh the generations.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:55 AM

White tails have also moved out here, bringing with them effete Eastern manners and discriminating against the local mule deer by cutting them dead socially. Mulies aren't invited to the soirees of the "Better Deer" and are snubbed in the streets. I've seen it, the white tail does looking down their lorengettes at a hard-working muley and then turning up their noses and mincing off, fanning themselves.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Acme
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:30 AM

Ah! I also love John McPhee. I can see several of his books on my shelf from here. And his articles in The New Yorker.

Lots of dead critters on the road this morning. Something McPhee could (if he hasn't) write about. My tour of flattened fauna included a well-fed pet cat, skunks, and, I think, baby possums near their mom, knocked off when she was hit by a car. I didn't stop to be sure, but I think that's what I passed this morning.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:39 AM

Of course, dialects among the larger deer relatives can get confusing, as "moose" in North America = "elk" in Europe. Caribou in North America = Reindeer in Europe. "Elk" in the US normally refers to the Wapita, which is extinct in it's eastern ranges, and essentially has been since the War of Northern Agression;

however the Caribou was often referred to as "elk" in NE and in more recent times in NY.   But there are also Wapiti in ONtario which can wander south, though they are not Eastern Elk, or may not be Eastern Elk; their population has grown more rapidly then expected from the 24 western elk imported. All of which gets even more confusing as wapiti were thought to be the same as european Red Deet, but have since been shown to be genetically a seperate species, as indeed was the eastern elk from the western elk.

Anyway - that's the story on elk and their ilk.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Rapparee
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:48 AM

Well, not completely. "Reindeer" are actually domesticated caribou in North America but "reindeer" in Europe. The Irish Elk had characteristics of both the moose and the wapiti, but it was misnamed and was actually a deer.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 May 10 - 11:48 AM

@RApaire

How true! White-tail Does just don't appreciate the hard working Mule Bucks; wheareas the pushy White tail bucks impress the Mule does...but infant mortality is high in the mixed marriages.

BTW- did you know Mule deer are the descendants of a white tail/black tail cross "in the old days"?    Up to recently people tought 'twas the other way round.


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: Janie
Date: 27 May 10 - 12:16 PM

Stilly - he did indeed write about roadkill in "Travels in Georgia."

So.....just what creature did run over Grandpa?


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Subject: RE: BS: The Mother of all BS threads
From: MMario
Date: 27 May 10 - 12:48 PM

just what creature did run over Grandpa?

I think it was a Harley....then a Peterbilt; but it could have been the other way round.


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